« Lovett or Leave It

Lovett Gets Steamrolled: A Best-Of

2023-08-26 | 🔗

Lovett learns a lesson or two when his guests take the reins in this week’s very special Best-Of episode. Do steamrollers have reins? Well, they do now! Abby McEnany commandeers the anchor’s seat while presenting Gay News. Jake McDorman picks up Lovett and charges into virgin territory. Paula Poundstone’s Lesley Stahl puts Lovett in the hot seat. Luenell riles up the Swifties, and Ms. Pat challenges our audience to answer two truths and a lie, all while Lovett holds on for dear life.

All of these segments were recorded before the WGA and SAG strikes were a twinkle in David Zaslav’s craven eye.

This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
It wasn't a lover leaving I'm on vacation addition. As we speak, a poor speak a boys water, falling female colada into my mouth. Jesus. And the rest of the team is at home in their creator that they were averse to create during adverse. But I find it really helps with the separation anxiety, but before I dose them with better in turn out the lights levity leave accrue assembled a little best every year. As I said many, I'm the show is incredibly popular. Most of my guess, your honour to receive the invite. There is if he goes, whoever who might not be familiar with the show are familiar with me or they might just not care, and they make that incredibly clear. So here you have it the best of guests commandeering the show first up. Did you not get the assignment, or did you just choose not to follow it? It's gay news with Abby Mcinerney everywhere.
we take the show. We do our part to make that place a little bit gayer. Luckily chicago you're, doing most of the heavy lifting joining us now for a special, deep dish. Installment of gay news welcome back in the show Abby Mcinerney, the ones that good to see- and I just got a job offer been to that stage. It's like back in the abbey Thank you for being here John. I very honoured to be here with you tonight. now, typically with gay news, we say, but up up up up up up gay news together, but because we're in Chicago we're gonna. Do please join me in saying out about Deborah. Actually are you ready, I'm ready mother! Yes, what above it up at a bird the there
ravens home, which is set in Chicago made history with dizzy channels. First, trans character, Nicky played by actors: jewel a jewel and introduced an episode written by trans comedian, nor he read. Ok, back all the stuff I said disney. This is good! You do in solid postal if we work but I have brought about by the debate is closed bite and last week awarded sucker player, begging, rap uno, the presidential metal of freedom, the nations highest civilian honour. Do you know how good you to be a soccer, did make americans give a fuck. The woman should get it cabinet position, but up to bear red stars. What do they do? It says chicago's female factor team. You don't keep it at local gotta, keep a logo. she said receiving the metal was the honourable lifetime, or in other words it was her lifetime
I haven't read sir red sars nasa's release a spectacular new images from the james web space telescope has reignited, comes to rename the telescope which currently, on a former ass administrator involved in a lavender scare of the nineteen fifties when the tribune administration, purged algae, b, team q, employees from the federal government. Oh, what a twisted james web, we weave alibaba blah blah blah the those red stars ivy league, so I was like lavender menace, unlike that would be the fuckin borrowers nick? in the world so like I'd, be it they're like somebody would say so it can be like a classic lavender madness? It never picked up a stick. I think it's. I think it's a great thing to have you be called when you're, not there like hey, wait, wait, wait! A second
where's the lavender menace. You know it would be like hey where's that bitch she wants us to call her the lavender menace. It would be more like that. Hey you know that water was hitting us over the head with that nickname we don't want to honor with oh bye, bye, redirect shahrazad but bear doing So ok, risa, not resetting, reduce powering through that my forte, ok montana state library, commission voted against the proposed local for the montana state library over concerns that its prison design. Look too much like a pride flag. Yak we would want to compromise the raw heterosexual energy of the public library. We need to keep the library what it's always been a place, but red blooded straight men to get together with their brows quietly reed, but
but then I heard a barrister guy right now at quietly, red maintained, Japan announced that override equal benefits to employees and same sex unions. Even those same sex marriage is banned by job these law, all employers, what the hit a block with their heads in order receive their coins but I beg you never stopped? Coming on the show to the day I die. Ok, If you can do no wrong, it's going to be the shows that you are like out of the country because hosted once like: hey, we have a guest house enjoy guy mailman enjoy, enjoy gay news with guy branum. Okay, what's he like, he seems like a delight. We gotta keep going read this just read on your car. Read it out loud your news reader. Let's go the right way.
group, one million moms, nickname in college now, okay, sounds great, see! That's why it's all worth it! That's why we buy a ticket the right way and christian group, one million moms, has called for a boycott of disney's new marvel movie. Thor love and thunder complained that includes many lgbtq innuendos and an abundance of euphemisms. Perhaps they prefer the sequel, I'm working on thor, no innuendo, just queer fuckin up there in deadline, interview jane lynch insisted that she wasn't deliberately avoiding working the land, Michel and funny girl. I adore her. She just going to take the show and make it our own, I'm so glad she's getting the opportunity and relayed to do the show, and not just on glee sedley.
It's clearly reading from an egregiously misspelled blackmail letter can't get it up it's wrong. It's wrong! It's wrong, but up up above the I, when I got this, I wrote a smiley face that is so funny went ass. I received in every nomination for outstanding guess actors in a candy series for her role in who lose only murders in the building where she plays steve Martens characters stunt double. Martin short stunt double time. Crews was oddly overlooked, but very democratic nominee for Ellen noise. Seventeenth, congressional district, Eric Sorenson would be the first meteorologists in the u s house in nearly fifty years in illinois, first elected algae. We to chew congress person ever
I mean it is so awesome, there's a lot of places in this country where it can still be very challenging to come out of the closet. As a mediator, It's raining men. He said in tonight's forecast, hollow area, baron mcdonald, Ok alone may talk about a series of drag brunches and major cities, including chicago's by case india, as part of their leave moss pride level. It's in there it's gesture, but they shouldn't have scheduled it for brunch. It obviously should have been drag fourth meal, but I'm loving it loving. Oh yeah, okay, demi Lovato! Wearing a wig with bank set on Jimmy come alive that they hit therefore had on the large amethyst crystal and had to get three stitches. You gotta keep your healing. Crystal separate from your wounding crystals I've
There have been two maids I've. Why do you think still saying go, though, earlier this summer, justice, mueller added bruce bruce interview since his release from jail on sway in the morning where he claimed he didn't know about the backlash to his sage attack and do a full year after it happened. I'm sorry, but I'm certain you think this guy might have trouble telling the truth, but about the challenge and finally, chicago is home to the leather archives and museum. A museum dedicated to leather king fetish. And be the and history and culture and a fantastic little cafe, but you can figure out how to get some of that around the ball gag.
and that ain't news that I'm a huge fan I'll be megan. He is an american treasure, she's, like if extreme weather took corporeal form. Next up, I dug through a hot stray men about virginity. How did they think it will go? Here's jake Mcdormand our next guest joining us on stage stars in the new peacock show mrs Davis, which features betty gilpin as a nun. That was enough for us to go our next segment. What do the sage Jake Mcdermott things were being here, thinks you're hampers the ball. Let me just say: yeah I love this is as I do too. A good thing and people have tried to tell me what it is and it's like the matrix. He can't explain it. You have to see it for yourself really hard yeah. How would you describe it in one sentence? How dare you
Then your opening segment like impossible to describe how dare you attack me with such a hard hitting question right off the balance. I've done a press tour. I worked on your second one, one sentence: oh god, let's see I'm going to do it in fives and it's ok sure, there's no rules, okay, see by the way they told me to sit as close as humanly possible to you or you'd go ape shit. Is that right? I am I'm as close to you as I can possibly get without breaching the arm. That day that's just that they warned me yeah yeah, that's it! I love sitting closed to people already bygones avebury by mrs David, so god so, mrs Davis. Let's see it takes place in an alternate future, not unlike our own. This me so many send its red. So these are known. guy, not unlike our own, where a seemingly benevolence algorithm named mrs Davis, has risen to levels of ubiquity globally for ending hunger and saw
the all wars in the family in the climate change and all those things. By way of an app and my care, The wily stick with me is an ex bull rider and the ex boyfriend of a nun named simone played by the cosmic force of nature. That is betty gilpin or you get betty gilpin fans. Okay, you shouldn't be betty. Gilpin fan, she's fucking amazing. and we decide to take her down because we think she's up to some nefarious doings, generous heart, need you yeah right are you did I? Why would you do this to me? I'm sorry, Are you a virgin jake, I cool it's cool. If you were, you know, a new or its mind is highly listen. This would be exactly where I'd want to admit it. If I couldn't, Think of a better with than on it, as of people. Do you think that Amerika is willing to elect a virgin president. Let me get, you may not be a virgin. He may have thought we don't know for sure, and theirs
if he has, or has it that I feel about you. I am sure why not- maybe I'd be a great thing for us who knows, I would, by the way, we're going to visit the shows about a nun and work were going virgin because virgin mary, none yeah, that's it I got it all, we got a guy you're. This is. She plays a non yes and nuns bear abstemious from sex, correct you have my regular monitoring, Yadda yadda yadda forever. I bitterly from sister act, yeah yeah, that's that is The only yeah, that's the whole, none the background that I had going into this job. His sister act. I feel like you, dodged the question. Wouldn't it a vote for a virgin threats. It now took act is our rooted? Yes, yes, I think there would be a very small section of the conservative right there with love that
mom sit down. I've done its money right because on some level I think, culturally, we all believe single people are fucking freaks neeoka, the concept of virginity is strange? It's like whatever some weren't considered someone who has been in a pool until your whole body had been in a pool where I don't follow. I don't break them down a little before me. Moving on what do you want me to sit closer? No. This is good. I'm good at this level when you were a chasm is Davis. Did you know about it? as Davis? Did you know that it was just like from the last guy in the young sheldon lady, or did you have details? I had like a script, yeah, no yeah! There's I mean I knew about it in my introduction to MRS Davis was my audition for mrs Davis call yeah yeah yeah, it's funny to hear
you're very good in the shower? Thank you, man. It's great. It's a fund show is tickets best kept secret and god is america's best kept streaming Sadly, so true have you simple stuff men poker faces good to hey, hey peacock, its thing NBC decided to call their streaming services, because we all of us- and we all- grew up with peacock mascots, because we all with NBC growing up. We all love the peacock. We'd all say hey. Are you guys going to check out the peacock tonight yeah who among us hasn't gone as the NBC peacock for halloween? Are you afraid of ai yeah a little bit I mean I'm dabbling with it. Like everyone else is right now he did some dabbling doing a little devil. You make any art, I am embarrassingly yeah during jornada yeah. I do. I had them at whatever. We call it in it and isn't it
in I had it put my mom's cat on horseback, like napoleon in the style of a vermeer oil painting, how it was incredibly good. How is at school it's good. I want to get a blown up for our fur herbert their problem. Neat, that's where it stops. That's I'm done after this dutch dutch for mere oh yeah virgin I don't know over mere felt or not I don't I paint or the hands that leads me to think. Yes, and this is? Nothing and they're getting such a good idea of what the show's about yeah there's, also in the show you blow up a horse, I do yeah yeah.
Did they kill a real horse that was at the magic of hollywood yeah. No, that was a that was a real horse. Bummer, that's a bummer! That's a bummer. People are going to be fucking pissed, but remember that h, b, o show killed all those horses- oh my god, yeah. What that luck? Luck, yeah, Jesus yeah! runs like this. Is? U boring to killers as busy mentioned begin, I didn't we earn our horse. Does and so I would like to see it as a resource. Kay sacrifice its worthy smoking is a ride like a lot blah blah blah blah ready to have hit on luck. as previously mentioned the connecting threat of of this segment ten years thin. Just like the concept of virginity itself, Jake are you it's your questions about virginity and the virgins who have never had sex. Ok, do
now at cyber gamer, going save yourself for this quiz. According to a study, what percentage of the college students dont consider oral genital contact of virginity loss. Oh my god roquefort percentage, the percentage they don't count it yeah. I was who said ninety nine I'm gonna go is somewhere in the nineties its low? it's only sixty percent forty percent counted, oh my god. Everyone. So disappoint is what a weird thing to feel like you have a dog in the fight in two thousand and twelve. What did thirty six year old virgin trent arson not make national news for doing tat simple Oh, my god listen, I have to say I'm gonna try my best in this quest, but I'm not too bombed. If I'm not,
virgin expert. It just sounds like saying it out. Loud sounds, probably jake, mcdormand actor veteran expert better to be safe, then sell puts on their resume better to be a virgin expert than an expert virgin. You know what I mean: that's that's what it ends up with and what what's the tone that thirty six year old virgin made national news I'll, take it because you have been completely impossible, this great the FDA, threatened to fight in jail him for his d. I why sperm bank, after it was revealed that he fathered fifteen children, so for donating to maloney too much sperm, but he was a virgin at the time he was that was it. things like I'm, not gonna, wasted, wow decide. I was the thing too:
and the show is, mrs EVA all this and more rigid brands and shut down a satellite launch start up this week. What was called virgin galactic it was. It was version or by boat now going to have given the czech were giving its what inventor? What invent our best known for his contribution to the development of the modern, alternating current electricity system is believed to have been a virgin at the time of his passing a ninety forty three, but he did say of his pet pigeon. I loved pigeon as a man loves a woman and she loved me as long as they had her. There was purpose to my life to nickel, it? Is you gotta, if all morning, virgin cocktail, which I absolutely I'm not I might order my sober Roy rogers Jake. What is a really roger god, what's like what's in every roger, is cola, I'd marriage, she no cherry, and this and simple its
energy strategy, which is a true, just really saying sets its region. Could you imagine, having a coca cola being what could make the sweeter than the wild beverage? Have the alcohol roy ran the kids alcohol better? That way, rogers, surely temples now quality or I showed him with a ginger ale liquidity in the insane beverly crazy, crazy. According to some catholic teachings, say lucy, was a virgin martyr who removed what part of her body to discourage admiring. Suitor only forgot to restore said body par after her death. I really appreciate the hell was that Yes, it's why she's, the patron saint of ion is is It's a little bodies, eyes dave, MRS J. This is data. Can you watch it? We can watch it on p its he caught the let you watch the first one for free, but
a drug dealer outside school. That's how they get a peacock its a drug dealer out of school after school, special streamers for someone in virginity. Pledges were huge thing in the arts, I'm gonna region celebrities who were famous, Do thousands which one of these be did not publicly declared themselves a virgin, or maybe they held it? Oh god, ok, britney spears. Is the jonas brothers Selena gomez, miley cyrus tim tito jessica simpson? Was it I feel like they all. They all did you gotta yeah yeah arrive. And finally, what was the penny? see for vessel virgins who are found to have fought for they burned at the stake so close, buried alive. While there live buried alive god, I'd probably I'd. Probably
four burnt at this now you know I don't think so. What buried alive? Yeah? No, I mean it of such goods being with us. If we're not vans of either the, I know both are bad options, but peacock we're not vana being buried alive or being burnt. I've exactly does actually, The opening I'm is data, as there is the burning of heretics at the stake. That's why I said that I was trying to promote the show and that's what this did. That exactly what this to them Yeah Jake will be back with a rare wheel. Thank you! So much being a man, everybody go watch, ms Davis. It is really genuinely. Actually I get out of the gate. Don't go anywhere more of love it or leave it coming up this brought to you by rocket money theirs? scripture for everything these days from streaming services to fitness programmes, and sometimes it feels impossible to keep tabs on what you're paying for every month rocket money as a personal finance up that fight
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by exploring the inner life of his offer person. We already know she does cross vet plus Political opinions even worse, however, I reassured me but this is sixty minutes, anti g is gonna, get their business to detect it. Unfortunately, while our interview, unless we start push back, it varies pointed interview. There was this moment democrats or even Joe Biden. The president himself supports children being. Sexual eyes and having transgender surgeries sexual children is what pedophiles due to children and the segment dared to ask this question. question for her and the country is, can she expand her brash empty g brand beyond, the right wing populists base. So the question is that the question leslie: are you sure about that? or sure about? That's why
as greens, smear Democrats is pedophiles. That's what she does. That's like hiring scarlett johansson to be in your movie and when she hands in a flat, aloof performance, you get upset because you can't tell if its magical or nothing that's what you signed up for Was that amazing and real? Was it nothing? None of us now Well, we have some news. We love it or leave it haven't or several previous interviews, Lesley Stahl gave archival transcripts few new about that relate to the very holiday of pay. Soc that we marked evening here to help us reenact them in a second we're calling lovingly their presence, leslie stall theatre playing? newspaper self is the incredible paula stone? Have you on show? It's lovely to be here. It's also unexpected. I drove back to go to another country. I live at santa Monica so voice.
Level get getting here and my gps? I would come to like a freeway and the gps suggests that I just drive across it just no no light nothing just go just go. I was traumatic and then The parking garage would happen while the black garage had the reserve, spaces. The signs are in yellow as you can, I don't see that well to begin with, which is not a good thing to suggest what dr here, but, and so I would pull into the space and realize what the fuck there's a yellow god, damn reserve sign there. You would put it in in a different color. Don't you think I contrasting color? It was like.
whispering the four times I pulled into spaces four times, and I don't back up that well. Show everytime, I'm like mother fucker to another yellow reserve sign. You know if it's your space bike ride, put your fucking name on it in big letters. The franchise's is a dream. Come true for me. The way that you want to just talk, what's up yeah, what else is happening with you? Well, I did you know because you they sent me that your tail, a green interview, I'd heard, p talking about it. I have to say in this bad, as I actually expected it to be. It's over. This new wants to what I said that she pushed back at times, yeah, not a lot. Not sure that I rolling works with marjorie? Tell a green Yanks is not going to work on this woman yanks doesn't work with fascism,
you're know what you more powerful weapon that a yanks you know, I'm not sure about. I just listened to a book. bob Mussolini, can you remember from it was a powerful deterrent, yet that there was on it was ramos weakness. he was like he couldn't figure out what to do with a ye. Could not patton. Oh I'll, tell you something: Stalin give them a ye gods out of their peers. Are I remember about mussolini? It said that though he was killed in the end by their partisan. I believe, turned on him or something was held captive. Hotel for a little while and they put him in a truck one day with, I think three other captives and they drove him to the top of a hill and they shot them. and then they took Mussolini back down to the town square and they hung his dead body in the people was so angry with him that they beat the dead body withstand.
And they put a dead mouse in his mouth That was an interesting detail, whether there are also some dragging with their dragging involved by the legs, I can't remember any longer. Okay, here's the other thing. It said in the book. I have never heard anybody else say this, but I have not really talked about much lady to anybody, but you and I'm glad that you feel safe enough to do. Thank you for sharing this with me. I do. This is a really developmental time for me, but a one point. They contacted his wife girlfriend or whatever it was in. They asked her. If she one at that I live in a small house. I dont know where I would put it and appearance. The americans. I believe it was somehow a little sliver of his brain came to america causing added
they were looking at a sliver of his brain on microscopes line, which I just think it's funny What are you looking for? Work is well ok, ass. There is. There is your problem. I beg your brain was: where was up a global guy was a deck. Would you look at that same can't? Look before like I can't take nice guy, miss your kid is having developmental. Bravo, these are maybe act out alive. You can't just take a slice of their brand ago allocates of asshole, No, you wait until the brighton's dead to look at the brain by then it'll be in your hands. You can scan it. We've got scanning, but they're not magnetic about them, not with mussolini back, then they weren't mri was illini. There was that didn't exist, Now then,
in the matter. I realize you know, there's that that famous discovery albert einstein was famously said: hey leave my brain alone and then he died over like you're dead, we're doing what we want a very soon I did he say, leave my brain alone, I'm remembering a book I read. Much longer ago than when you read the mussolini book and as much as you're not covered in your mussolini knowledge. You'd. in moscow on solid ground with your eyes, but here's my question. So when they looked at albert einstein's brain they were hoping they were going to see like I dunno extra stuff like wow, that's a brain right there holy shit, yeah! No, that's not would help it. It just look like a normal human brain. It could have been anybody's brain. What if what we're dealing with here is the Mussolini brain and the einstein brain. Swapped got mixed up yet another classic like a wacky wednesday's the apparent travelling. I now know freely. He ride everything right, I had a anyone river, the book lucky ones. I don't know
fighting whacking whence? Why can't you just gotta admit you're wrong? I don't have it. I don't do that on the whole crowd ass to feel bad about their literacy somewhat remembers where he went upstairs and whack web anyone's. It was wacky reservoir, it with obviously ridiculous grab to try to get some freaky friday money yeah, you know really on it. Wasn't the right thing to do to write wacky wednesday? Seven don't go, things pay attention is focused on how we sound don't want you, google, in every area and he's googling I now I brought my voice, does is right, but there would exist right, hell, yeah shit, who pays echo, We, I guess I do how I let's do. It would seem to be with you so nicely with you this we as a dream, come true for me. You know I ve been a man to be added. Try here it is a higher not gonna. This is it wall,
Is it for me come on? Well, thank you. You know level was on my part. Cash was, and I had no idea. You never even heard me before you. A word at the time. Yes, I got is blocking now he'll jerry, like you were like as smoking, like I like bodyguards with a red shirt like I like the idea of a var of iowa, and I always started the job, we do a couple of jokes somebody or how about that alright for those listening at home. That wasn't me that was Paul's impression of me. I know that's exactly what he was like and as I got a couple of hundred I do this burgomaster is it's weird name podcast yeah. We on its heels, we're it really colleague them with them. If you say enough, it just feel weird sure them.
Them them. That's weird, isn't it. I came up with that them. I dunno. I don't think I think the thing that sort of evolved yeah, probably from used to be just It started with a lot of paul egg, is reminding everybody catching you up because previously on paul pounced on another leave it this was a leslie stahl. Some time ago. First interview we like to present and in others might might seem, implausible is an interview. Leslie stall did with the faro from the book of exit as the actual arrow from the past adversary. Paul? Are you ready? I am. Pharaoh You ve got some pretty radical views and a sharp tongue, but you ve somehow managed to capture the national limelight. Taking on the role of a half human demigod who rules over your kingdom with an iron fist. Tell me in the
words of your political rival, who you ve called a bush. Arsonist Moses Why won't you let my people go? Let my people go sounds like your average twitter trolling, my mentions, leslie. The edge of the question is simple: jewish people love their ups building pyramids as jewish people famously kill it on the manual labor front, and while I don't pay them and hold them against their will, a lot of people are trying to cancel me because I'm a boss and no one wants to work any more. Also Moses is up at a file already. Then What is its doll? Everyone?
I did paul a balance that will be back while I love pull down zone and by the time she came back for a second joshi, even learn my name, a woman who still might not know my name blue now, here's or second appearance where we didn't even bother to come up with a segment because we knew some battles are worth fighting the last time she was a lover to leave it. We quizzer next guess at the very specific details of last summer, celebrity jet scandal, drakes white times white lengths. The quantities of carbon emissions produced. By tell us who explained the host bang and are an excess really refused embrace the premise of the segment and took over the show completely so now we're just going to do whatever. Please welcome back to the show lou. Now the C'Mon, how you doing hi everybody, no notice me, I'm ohio, everybody, laughs, hi. There
I, when you are on the show. Last time, You have any idea what it was now I said really know what the fuck is going on? Do you think that that's why you introduce yourself to me backstage that's, probably. Why I've forgotten. Awhile, ok meant a lot to me. Clearly, all right! Here's the deal. I one get your take on themself, I'm basically going to go until malcolm or Brian says we have to stop okay. Is it okay? Oh, and this is a segment we're calling show in LA now What do you think about taylor, swift, potentially dating Matt Healy, whose, healy.
the singer of a band called the nineteen. Seventy five, ok, so his nobody. Why do I think about tailors were getting a if that's how you want to interpret the question? I think that taylor is always looking for love and inspiration. There are songs and that you know, every breakup should make a million dollars out there and everybody should break out, whereas you make one million dollars, you write a song about them, so I say Taylor. Do your anger, taylor, swift, manages slept but not look like when getting legato Hannah's given up given up the the taylor said side? Should google delete
count sediment inactive for two years, but gmail and you too yes makes more space for life We found rich, not smart. Rely mandy ma am you can give live change very and I'm having a clear answer. you're ready for my summer beach body nudes you now definitely changed my life max. are you going to see the new little mermaids disney make these live actually makes and which one should they do next? I absolutely positively what to see the low mermaid due to my schedule and things I don't really have a lotta time to go to the movie theater and if I send Nicole dark room, I have to be sure I'm going to leap out a lotta gluttonously grander little mermaid, so have I
get a chance to see it? I fully support it. I can't wait to see it looks beautiful and what was the other question? What other animated disney movies would you want to see as live action while they already dear papa? I Maybe the jetsons sure maybe love and exemptions always been ahead. They die That means that a bad rosy, the robot Do you remember how do these motherfucker anyway loving outside? No I'm thinking about it. Doesn't there are many unemployed sounds I already did. When zones rodeo john on and John goodman and highly bare, and how we bury our right, you now to make a very important decision. Ok, you're the deciding vote. This has been a tie score on the internet all week. I'm the decided the deciding vote for our society. I should wait a minute you can handle, it can come of brain
whose hotter young albert chino or young robert Janeiro. We have photos for your reference. Oh well well, wait a minute wait, a minute we are reminded everybody have second, give it a god. Damn sec, rice, locale, Regina Goddamn, Swag though I wouldn't use a straight. we're going, allow that fit and still again balls you now and How did she know was based a master so passionately with fan too. oh shit. My nipples is getting hard talking about. Girls is down because the charge where they're going to give that away. So I'm the determining fact yeah you gotta decide.
well, I'm gonna have to just give it to the boss. I'm gonna give it to de Niro yeah. I got two alpha channel followed in his footsteps. Deniro didn't follow. It is interesting, batting okay, so I have to give it to the boss the crowd. Thanks are, I don't know over fuck, you told me I was determined to do one thing now. What do you do I'm sorry I mean to offend. You aren't good into our I, how many people They patino how many people say Deniro, but buddy bows ass man she's, the one that we go get it What is you about? I worried about it not at all.
The other is it's take other jobs, robots will never be able to be barbers. It'll, never be able, god man say: hair gonna always needed human to do that, you're! Ok, that's one! That's one job yeah buzz! job every mother. Forgive me really good point the guy and funeral directly. Robots will never be able to do their university. That's a sensitive unita person. In a moment. You don't a robot brazilian whacked sex Jane, I don't wanna robot, knowing that I think it's cool that you went to brazilian wax technician before pilot Will you ask me, I know I am I let's actually blathers, don't flatter. Why, now by the facts, I
yeah. No added down there be up there, Remember plain beyond cruise control ass loud. I'm I'm allowed this. I currently, DR, hopefully for a limited time. Tesla and it's cool address itself, and how is it barely hits anything. You know it. Basically can recognised almost with love and that's the cool thing about it, is about the human form, get recognized that most of the time and that's you need. What happens when we die I hope to never find out and no blue. I I hope you know I don't know. Maybe then I ask other people here are at work
open this up. You can ask the now one question germ line when they do what they want to oppose it. Not what I'm going to go on. My one minute of begging was rallies got everywhere. Everybody. Also, let's go What am I do re there. I what's your name and what's your question, my name is emma and my question is you know, what's your last meal, why are you eating? Well, not watch my way. My blood pressure, because my ask me I'll, probably really love gumbo. If you know a gumbo, probably gamba was a beggar knows that yeah and like no diameter, from the going to die right, go yet
yeah man, containers and chin last august, nice butchers of it. What is mine god is it just fast food? Am I that disgusting come I'll? Do that I'll? Do like the last me longer to get on this beautiful planet and all it's bounty and I'm like? Oh, I guess a I guess, a chalupa book, but steak Allow me just meant something like a grandma used to make some money and the thing is I: could you you're doing its job. wish food, and so it's like I know I don't wanna ride. Brisket say good luck. I dont want to enterprise give her. Knowing my culture, yeah daddy, opted funds in new york, we gotta get nowhere. Your name is square knot around and looked around. I want to give a fuck what shape it is. Actually I like them, full of carbs kill you
hi. What's your name and what is your question? I am my name's marcella eminent, follow the same format of the previous question. If you could teach She a high school class for a day. What would you teach and what would you teach Genji well as two different quizzed? If I could teach anything to any class of any age, it would be independence and self worth and tolerance and he were enacted thieves, Jim z. Anything it will probably be too shut the fuck up and do it I'll fuck eyes
our romilly juice them their animals a bit about was vague because you motherfuckers judges, mad disrespectful. Most of you not all of you know. It's really not funny is really fucked We're Gaza does believe in you know, you don't have a right to talk to order For the way that some of talking over you write a right is your mother for compared they put their foot in your ass. Have you been raised, my mother, fucking habit? I put my foot and you wouldn't be talked about enough. Got them each a cause for the front, We do not do that as I try to be. As a member of Genji someone who is respectful, I try to put my best way forward on behalf of my generation generation, z.
as someone who was born and has no recollection of nine eleven, I was taught about nine eleven when I was an older child to me that took place a long time ago in the same way that, like my friends, went to law school and the end of it, they have to like study for the bar and find out what the law actually is cause. They spent three years like learning about philosophical nonsense, I think it is crazy. You graduate high school in this country, and then you find out what taxes are patient. teach about so fucking nuts lube that you graduate no idea that some bullshit yeah god damn it- I agree with that and now we're on the same page with that. Well, that's a great place to limit. It is you're. Not really now she'll be back, don't go anywhere, is more love it or leave it coming up.
I've been told us important that I read this verbatim. Room room beat beat positive. America is heading back on the road for six live shows this fall and winter we'll be in Louisville, cleveland washed. In dc new Orleans alcohol, that's the san diego verbs in San jose, we finally going to alcohol and the paris of the san diego metro area. They call it. There are no office in politics or political podcasting with important elections this year in Kentucky ohio, Louisiana and virginia works out the other breaking down the news, helping you find ways to make an impact. ok, home the sub, greater a word, get your tickets now, a cricket that comes out of it. hmm. While I was, I cared about this show as little as you know does, but unfortunately for big, I hear a lot about the work I do did someone say work so, with a question about work. If it's, how
excel you're on your own. If something stick your we ve got answers work appropriate. It must listen, weekly, punk ass, it delivers funny but useful work by advice for range of listened dilemmas her. How do I get my manager to stop taxi me after hours to what do I do When my company thinks are toxic. Culture can be fixed with taco tuesdays the once maybe lemon? Thus, but so are the solutions? Listen to a new episode of work, appropriate everyone say wherever you get your pack ass? Did you wanted? first probably debate where you horrified troubles, and I but so is the right wing clown car drafting behind him. Tat means I think we have work to do. Cricket is building a better progressive media company. As a counterweight to all the rightwing noise and vote. Save America is organizing on the ground for twenty twenty four and beyond. You can port that work by subscribing to friends of the pod. Today, a crooked dot com, slash friends, sign up! It's an incredible community! You Every episodes of our pods plus you get a bunch of other content that really fun in some of our loses, most stir of searches plus the better part of this court, so check it out And finally, if you enjoy this next gas buy tickets.
Atlanta show because she's coming back, we were lesson three minutes into the second before she threatened to eat me, and I still worry. If that was a threat or a promise is ms pat was and has has been a serious show so far little bit cipher to get even more serious. Now, it's not here to lie directly to our audiences faces. It's the incredibly funny the phenomenal your favorite comedian in mind, miss pat rafter, thanks for being here. Thank you for how arya just fine welcome. Welcome how ya doing I think you said I'm doing fine. Are you do at the moment fifty saw him sleepy raw sleepy, aren't so you're from atlanta, yes born and raise. Who is your fee?
we're politician in your hometown right now, Stacy I was wish you keep losing I now it's tough itself. We wanted a wind win away into place is something a scare in atlanta. Would they look after all she gad? They won't help. You think! That's what it is like but yeah the effort to scare away people when it is not moist? So if she will put a little more grease in it, why people feel unsafe or the fuck? Were you in October the great great advice? It's too fucking late everybody's trying to help her bar? That's not enough! It didn't work, by more than one vote. Where see. Now the comb her fuckin here, then you like our made lose. I were wake. Thank you. To the person in the mirror
and everybody else think I'm being rude easy and you can be no big old black lady with no smile laugh roll. You gotta balance the shit out the window to see me what hair on my head cause. I'm a big ass black one. I want you to know something with got to comment on any of this, the going to say you better, not catch the hour. Eto'o widen the spin. Allow dams, as I ate, a white man, the man I gotta say: yachty wale, the
I just know you pussy unity. We get it now this bad as an incredible storyteller as my window store those a tree, I guess we're just I'm just trying to transition out I'll get without so much as hinting at a comment and what you'd been for my own, safe it's so good in fact its act nearly impossible to know where her real life ends and the bit begins? so we're gonna need a volunteer to play a game again we're calling to choose and ally with miss pat here's outworks. I'm, a red three log lines of stories to our real stories from his past life. And one is woman made up if you correctly
which one is false. You get asked miss pad to tell the story of your choosing. She won't listen. You told her fuckin story one. That's the beauty of it is barely a game at all. hi. What's your name, biggie Vicki law right here are three entirely true things that must ban. You to choose which, when you think is the lie right. Ok, miss pat was attacked by an escape. Cougar kicked out of her coupon club, hit by a dumb truck where's. the coupon club. How did you know you are still show as when I other boss that happen there? happen, so you got it wrong. What come on now, so you you were kicked out club and hit by club and hit by a different days. We one really bad wednesday. The dump truck dumptruck come from me. He knows a monopoly and drive back the cubans
modes of indiana praise god playing for india, and I wanted to fit in air conservative look white neighbour, great neighbours. I was there for fifteen years and So I wanted something to do. My career wasn't taken up, so I tried to join a coupon gloss on a black, from the inner city of atlanta, and we don't. occupied by women is serious about this year. They keep their stuff like bursts activities, and so they had. You know you had to have a booklet that are lined up or you went to the store on that day. Well, drug dealer. So I bow minds up like don't mighty and put a rubber band around and give the biggest coupons on the outside and stuff it. In my theory, okay and they told me I had to go, I said I wasn't organized as horse shit, this doubt about tat, tide laundry detergent why you gotta be argonauts today and you are hit by a dump truck
jump, don't topple. Mikey is via turkey say. Having seen a jump over overpay cause. He would see me at a woman, the car, so a drug in a to I love, you we say said he me, love or make it you crazy love made me- do allow a crazy risen. no state- or he will streamlets observatory, I was walking over breeds and I look down. He had a woman in a car, so yeah and I'm think I'm spider man, a wonder woman at our jump, donut Damn who, at a level that has been achieved, Well, I'd say you know in fairness to him, you really
Don't expect to get caught that way. You know you may not think you're going to get away with it, but when you're on the highway you think you're safe. He can this big black woman fly like a guy laying on the windshield, that's cool, What was the best case scenario for you when you're like? What did you want to have an what's the goal when you throw yourself over the overpass you're coming down your land on the head of a car. You see him, you see here. What do you want to happen with the best outcome for you. I want to basically get out the car, that's cool, that's cool! That's cool: what did you think? I was therefore a raft. I just I dunno what you wanted. I don't know how to cheat. Do you know what you're doing?
You see outdoor valid throughout Europe. Your car. Sir, are you want to go next hi? What's your name? Ass Alice is here three truths. but ones ally at jimmy kimmel at norman, lear's, hundredth birthday party. She met Jimmy Buffett, a divorce court. She mentioned me carter at a mcdonald's in the first one, you'd be the first one's false. Yes, no, it's true wrong? Damn I'm their interests understand how you met Jimmy carter, mcdonald's I used to mcdonald cause. I was convicted, fell in and I will give my life by the us. Thank you for life because I used to say, oh Craig saw some we're gonna make dollar mobile roll on give my life by together, but I'm do what everybody else do you know begging I'll see if these are begging old. Dame
dollar pay three. Seventy five hour. You can't live off days. everybody, how to turn was still in out of the ratio, was my rage today to steal. So I'm sorry in that the registry in while these white dudes with plugs in their ears- and he was like an a look at a oh, my god- they caught me- stealing them go. My parole officer is somewhere this tuesday, I hear him say, is clear in in wall president Jimmy I thought: obama re, adding recognise as It gives to the on light. He looked for me. He probably sixty eight. It's our pay, injector net. is that hanging on one side, and so I look at him and I say why he looked familiar and the boy on the grill run up to the racing patricia as the president of the united states, Jimmy Carter and my
I told ya, know you the end. He said nothing, he placed his order. I never giddy order a water, a cup of water of cheeseburger and a size, salad and not going to say. Edward just sheet is free. You president, I didn't give me no money that they cause. I was still in, and I will keep is mine side, salad and a burger. and a water cup of water as a fucked up he ordered from a god of denying motivate donald. Doesn't it you get a dynamic donald? Does now you break secret service into my daddy's, get the hell out of me because I was stealing so sound and a bird no fries, no four, as it was a war hour. That's why only got the one term, you wanna went to germany's country. We gotta get fries but he was too nice tonight. We're fries a second
That's a good boy! Aright last one is somebody else. Have Betsy right. You're in the front, raise your hand, I can I betty betty comes every we hate bessie I keep coming, which are the following. Is it true? bill Clinton inadvertently started miss pats career present abroad Burma got miss pats. Car toad, ronald reagan, killed. Miss passed on see now No one got it the stories. two unbelievable. Let's start with this, so bill Clinton inadvertently started your career, yeah for bill Clinton because he was cute any great approach. I'm called the wealth that a work programme for lay a bit like me. I had to go, get a job and I hate it. Bill Clinton everyday because,
I couldn't was too young and arrest this anymore. So I get a job and I became a medicos. This, that's how I got my g d. I would never god had he not pay me back on about dignity. Is the school was very cool, brooklyn all your heroes now I find it hard to believe ronald reagan, killed your dog on a regular, actually give model fuck, so forget it was a second term me. My doll was suddenly stood a radio, I'm not lad. He was on a back porch. I had wonder and it was raining wheels so poor- and I would just like anybody- will Ronald Reagan, so I can get better lunch at school and You say your new president ronald Reagan, a mad dog jumped out
airport in hungary, seven I was like no laughing. What do you mean democrats? Don't care to say, as republican do don't do that, and my dog was like fuck Al Ahmad here. Yeah, ok, bye, no doubt fool, I'm tired of NP vs withdraw and my dogs is he jumped at the backboard What he's a words it's just georgia was it. He was all germans. Everyone knows that tv was. He had had so this is just jumped out the back poison. It stopped raining, I went out and got them. I was like hey boy. You should tell me which I liked you. Now he blanks, oh yeah, scared, lame khazar white
well. Here we are aguilar he had a black family reunion yeah. He was like this kind of blackness ain't, never been an issue, so he's screaming. Y'all scared lab little brother and I'll, never own another dog. I just got a doubt. My husband just bought a doll, and that was that's been. Oh I'm fifty so that had to be over. Like thirty five ford he is so mars, went out and about three can causal and they Like my real daddy interface face plunged up my little mother, like a handout, spongy very low. My daddy look just like these dolls he day, so we can lay the scene.
Them is patio is now be deep. Us is out that there is a risk that this was a delight. Thank you. So much for being here, I was so worried about his parquet. Is gonna, say you do political several, my address vote ma am I be. I don't want to get into these fights the trot. Free is all because my name be a really good faces, He was a trump supporter and I was not letting that go out of my life yeah. I know how to pick my battles. Yeah great fences make great neighbors. They do, and I am listened to out at trump stuff as was put an imposing maguire ass thy way to go. Miss
Everybody she'll be back the most interesting stories in order of magnitude, more boring them as paths least interesting story and speaking of stories. That might be boring. It might be interesting here it is the height of hey John. This is chris calling from a taylor michigan I'm. I am a very proud michiganders with gretchen whitmer. As my governor, I I live in a pretty pretty conservative town and I did kind of down and just disappointed in some of the the flags that are still up or like a bumper stickers or like the some of the things that people put around, because my town is a little bit more republican heavy, but on my high notice that everything that my governor has done a gretchen whitmer or as we call her big rats, her michigan budget is including lower cost, a historic education for kids, the money, investments and improved health care for mom,
yeah they are access to more public safety, housing free breakfast and, as you can hear, that's my daughter in the back seat- and it just makes me so happy and optimistic to know that we mobilized over these midterms and we got a Democrat in the house and the Senate and we're being led by big red self, though. My high note, as even though I live in a pretty republic and I had to pull up listening to your broadcast- that we have such a wonderful governor. Did the high note, and even like looking at gretchen whittemore nationally on she's, just such an amazing person and even wrestling with during the corona virus pandemic, but enough rambling? I I stand with a woman from Michigan and I will always stand and I love your show. I love you and I want to give a shout out to a my friend, tommy Tommy knew who your show and my brother dan so shout out to you tommy and shout out to your dad columbia.
Hey John. This is John calling from san diego hi load of the week is thanks to a body the administration after twenty five years in business and ten years, working for non profit as a theatre, production manager. My students, forget any under the public service loan forgiveness programs, boo hoo, I'm tickled thing, Did you john for all? You do loveless. If you every week, I love it, kristen christian in sacramento and I'm thrilled to share that after four long years of litigation appeals and with you by the California supreme court, my harassment lawsuit against the former fire was finally settled: every independent contractor and dig economy worker deserves to be protected from harassment and discrimination in the workplace. The rest pass legal protections in every state. Thanks level,
hi, my name, my name's karen, I listen portland oregon- and I know this week- is that I'm alive right now and I was hit by a car today afternoon and I came through for accuracy night terribly ensuring that I am. Laying down a my living room with a concussion, and I was just listening to your show from this week and laughing so hard, red shirt, which was terrible bummer by an overall, really a joy to be able to listen to you and your gas and to laugh about the state of the world, in a moment when I just really needed. Alas, so thank you for to do, and I'm really excited you see when you come to portland. Thanks
You call them with a high note. If you want to leave us a message about something they gave. You hope call us three, two, three five, three eight two, three seven seven, and that is our show. Thank you so much to abbe, magnanimity, Jake, mc dormant, paula, pounced on new now and miss pat. There are four hundred and thirty seven days until the twenty four elections will be dark next week back after labour day. Also, a big thanks to the team that makes us show everyday labour day when you but for me every day I have a great weakened. Everybody loves believing as agreed in media production. It is written breeze by me, John love it in the eyes and where a kindred james is our executive producer. Brian symbols are producer and Malcolm Whitfield is our associates producer.
We keep her as our head writer, Sarah lazarus jocelyn coffin, probably gonna on Peter Miller, rebecca kaplan, Allan, pierre and chandler dean are our writers Evan Sutton is our editor stephen cologne is our audio engineer and kyle segment provides audio support. Our theme song is written and performed by sure sure, thanks to our designer jesse mclean for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see, because this is a podcast and you are digital producer. Zuri urban David told me a kalman and magic route for filming and editing video each week. So you can, you could find those glorious videos at www, dot, youtube dot com, slash at love it or leave it podcast it's the best. We could do. I guess subscribed you love it or leave it on youtube for access to video versions of your favorite segments and other exclusive content. Don't forget to follow us, a crooked media on igy and twitter and if you're as opinionated as we are, consider dropping us a review on it or leave it.
Transcript generated on 2023-08-27.