In a special episode of No Stupid Questions, Angela Duckworth and Mike Maughan talk about unfinished tasks, recurring arguments, and Irish goodbyes.
- SOURCES:
- Roy Baumeister, social psychologist and visiting scholar at Harvard University.
- Daniel Gilbert, professor of psychology at Harvard University.
- John Gottman, professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Washington.
- Kurt Lewin, 20th-century German-American psychologist.
- E. J. Masicampo, professor of psychology at Wake Forest University.
- Timothy Wilson, professor of psychology at the University of Virginia.
- Bluma Zeigarnik, 20th-century Soviet psychologist.
- RESOURCES:
- "Life and Work of the Psychologist Bluma Zeigarnik," by M. Marco (Neurosciences and History, 2018).
- "Why We Need Answers," by Maria Konnikova (The New Yorker, 2013).
- "Consider It Done! Plan Making Can Eliminate the Cognitive Effects of Unfulfilled Goals," by E. J. Masicampo and Roy Baumeister (Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2011).
- The Science of Trust: Emotional Attunement for Couples, by John Gottman (2011).
- "'Let Me Dream On!' Anticipatory Emotions and Preference for Timing in Lotteries," by Martin Kocher, Michal Krawczyk, and Frans van Winden (Tinbergen Institute Discussion Paper, 2009).
- "Explaining Away: A Model of Affective Adaptation," by Timothy Wilson and Daniel Gilbert (Perspectives on Psychological Science, 2008).
- "On Finished and Unfinished Tasks," by Bluma Zeigarnik (A Source Book of Gestalt Psychology, 1938).
- EXTRAS:
- "Can We Disagree Better?" by No Stupid Questions (2023).
- "Would You Be Happier if You Were More Creative?" by No Stupid Questions (2023).
- "How Can You Be Kinder to Yourself?" by No Stupid Questions (2023).
- "What’s Wrong With Holding a Grudge?" by No Stupid Questions (2022).
- Somebody Loves You, Mr. Hatch, by Eileen Spinelli (1991).
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
This podcast dynamically inserts audio advertisements of varying lengths for each download.
As a result, the transcription time indexes may be inaccurate.
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Possibilities are beautiful either it's stephen dubner! This is the time of year. We, like
play for you. Some of the other shows we ve been making for the free economics radio network. Today, an episode of new stupid questions with Angela duckworth and mike
on. We started to show a few years ago with me as Angela's co host, but when it came time to replace myself well, I think you will agree that make has done brilliantly.
make, is an executive with qual tricks and does a variety of other interesting things. Angela, in case you
no is a research psychologist at the university of pennsylvania and author of the book grit. I hereby
predict that you will love this episode of no stupid questions and that you
immediately follow the show on your part, guessed at. So don't make a liar out of me as always, thanks for listening
yeah- that was basically psychology. A hundred years ago, just like went this restaurant. Let me go
happen. I mantilla duckworth, I'm like mine
and you're listening to no stupid questions today on a special episode of the show. Do you
closure in order to move on when a lottery to over one billion dollars, I call a friend in another state and then most him some money. Might we have an email
from schreyer bar gaza, and it is something
I have long wanted to talk about. Let's go home
like an angela? I recently read about this. I garlic effect and wanted to ask: is it true
that people remember unfinished or interrupted tasks better, then completed tasks. Anne. Could this be extrapolated to human relationships? Do relationships that have no closure
around in our heads more than the ones we ve been able to resolve an amicable? We close? Oh, my
Yes, now you're, like knee jerk reaction is yes. When you have
It's totally different it but leaves your head is out your intuition jar and just in
general, I love closer. I appreciate closure, even the ira,
exit drives me insane wait. What's the irish exit, it's when someone just like leaves and doesn't say goodbye, they just slip out of a party. Wiser club
irish into irish people. Do that I actually have no. He looked around and your like where's the
irish friends I had maybe it's a terrible thing to say now. I actually think could be it.
wildly inappropriate. I've done it before, though I mean haven't you
by the way, like you go to wedding, reception and youth,
and strategically I gotta be super visible later in the line of sight of the bride
the groom and brides family and goods valley. But then you know in this
whenever bees distracted the throne
ok, I mean I've totally snuck out. Have you not done? That
no? I agree with your horse and have also done that thing.
a wedding I went to this summer and the men
everyone was distracted and I made face time with enough people be aligned to the car, and then it was weeks later that the groom was like wait. Were you
for the dancing and as our yeah I think so I was that might be your first confession to me a fitting
now. I have to reevaluate everything we're urgent have to get closer on this risk. In a heap bothering me,
but until then I might be thinking about, and that is actually buzz. I garlic effect right, so you know this email from
traitor ass is this? I garlic effect real and I guess I should tell you what it is. I dont know that you ve heard
bout, it not so does iconic effect, is attributed to
lemme like our neck. She was
colleges and she was a student nearly a century ago. She studied with current leeuwen here.
A great psychologist himself, as I garnick says,
she was in a restaurant
and she observed that the waiter could keep
in their head, just like overdue.
he was number of orders and drink
and whose getting what then have they been served so she's just
warbling at this issues like how is it that you can keep all these things in your head,
but then she's even more astonished, because- and this is a little bit like myth now- you know she did write about it, but I think it's been maybe
bordered as myths. Are we ve mythologies all things that
for we do so maybe this is a bit of a screen written ending but ass
The waiter serves everyone's food answers at correctly. What happen
It is they finish eating this large group that bloomers, like our next part of and one person,
In a legend has it goes by
to retrieve an item that they left behind and this guest spots.
and asked for help and thinks that
This waiter, who can obviously remember everything, would remember
where they were sitting in the waiter looks at this
dinner guest
seemingly has no idea who they even are much less, where they sat and whether they had left something behind, and so the waiter had kind of like aris the hard drive.
of memory once the task was finished, so
those I garnett effect refers to keep it
in our minds unfinished tasks and when we
have closure on something is checked off resolved then that
exiting our mind. That's the myth here
really interesting corollary, and this is maybe I believe
because I went to school
If I'm way off on this, I mean how often did you cram before a test? You have all
information in your head or maybe not even cramming, but you studies.
How do you get ready and then you take the test and then it's all gone
have the closure of having finished the glass or taken the test and edges flow whose into the ether I hadn't,
thought about that make, but I think that would be an excellent demonstration of this. I effect for me, what is salient is being a professor.
Sometimes I will put up a slide in my class and
like verbatim the main point of the last class sort of way.
our goal is defined as blank and I think, to myself. Well class was
only a week ago, I spent three hours in every possible way
demonstrating these definitions. My
students, love me. They loved this class have readings to do on this subject, and I am sometimes,
astonished at the sub one hundred percent accuracy of these ease.
to me questions, but one could argue that if you are just like a great that classes over or take
that quiz like? I don't need to know that in one minute I gotta get fact is narrowly speaking about unfinished tasks, but you could
So just say, like you know, someone tells you pass code or a phone number and Europe
mentally rehearsing it in your head, seven
ass. You can do it and then you, like type in seventy,
or, and then you have no idea afterwards, and sometimes I can't even hold on long enough until I need to I now but ok sue
as I Garnett lived a century ago, and she had these
innovations, but let's just say that bloomers garnett was not running a lot of randomize controlled
interments, she was going to restaurants, yeah. That was basically psychology. One hundred years ago, she was like went to this restaurant and let me tell you what happened so more recently to social psychologists, eg, messy campo and
baumeister they had the idea of doing an expert
meant to see whether bloomers I garlic was right and
whether it was really true that unfulfilled goals persist
in our minds until they are fulfilled, and then they exit I'll just give you,
ample of one of the studies, they did to show that there really is. As I garlic effect, they said, you know the thing
Is that when you're doing something and you have to keep
in your head, like seventy four,
to force. Seventy four: it's like an unfinished task right, eats up cognitive bandwidth,
and it gives you by the way, an idea of why the brain doesn't actually remember seventy four after it doesn't need to cause. You want that cognitive bandwidth.
To do something else. We only keep in our minds active. What we need to, and so they just run, is clever experiments where, for example, they,
if people something to read that they needed to focus on like a passage from a novel, and if you had had a task assigned to you that you had not yet completed that you knew you were going to have to do afterwards. You
were more likely to mine
under and to understand
So what you're reading I mean the end
algae would be if I
go to a meeting
and I know that there is one thing that I wanted to to before when
the meeting, but I ran out of time what they found in this experiment is that your
a little distracted, the whole time you're doing this intermediaries task by the task.
You have not yet finished, but you know you have to, but is it not everything in life? I mean. How often do you finish everything that you need to do here? I mean I keep a pad of paper by my bed and as I'm going to bed, the lights are off I've
many fallen asleep and I wake back up and it's like. Oh my gosh, didn't do this close my eyes. Wake back up! Didn't do this
Ok, so you write things down on the pad before you go to sleep right. So then, in the morning all remember you do them, but when
gone to a meeting and he really wishes. I wanna go back to the patent. The ok, I've got something to say:
one is when we write things down is just,
external icing memory, yells you're, not gonna, forget the fight
things that you are supposed to do that you didn't do that. You need to do in the morning trade, but the other thing is yours
being those things out of the buffer of your head, so you're allowing yourself.
example I to like just go to sleep and not be seventy four.
Seventy four and that's what, MR campos,
and by mr found in a way, it's like the antidote to this kind of
occupation. We have with unfinished task as you're right might. This happens all the time, but also all the time we make plans
what they found in these experiments? That is
the volunteer, an experiment.
Was being subject to this. I garnick effect if they had an opportunity to write about a thing that there were supposed to do.
basically right down a plan, then they didn't suffer from it.
Gonna effect. So the idea that you have of keeping that part of paper
and a pen, your bedside, and I
As you know like this one dollar no book, you know those cheap composition, no books. I have this system where, on the
Outside of those pages. I take my notes. They're. All data can go back to my lab, no books from my very first year of graduate school because I have them all, but on the left side of these pages, which are often go
If I'm in a meeting or doing something
in a main task, but in my
had you know you ve ever those little thought bubbles you're like oh, I forgot my milk right like oh, I have to email that person. I have maybe four thousand of them a day and it's very distracting. So
I have all these plans and as soon as I write them down there out of my head
after member seventy four, seventy four because the next time
open, my notebook, it's just there for you so part of it is this
external asean, of memory
and that allows us their quota quote closure of that task, whether it be done or not, so that we can then focus on what's right in front of us yeah. I think
the way to think about it is your brain is doing what it needs to do its prioritizing and the brain
in is relieved of the responsibility of keeping something in
working memory like the kind of active memory of the brig
as you know that you ve written down, you know you ve made a plan and
we'll have to worry about it anymore. This is some would argue, one of the great leaps
forward for human civilization. When we have writing
wave extra analyzing, all the things that you don't have to like keeping you're working memory, yearn for
We even in your long term memory causing don't look it up, but this generally
is yes, you can free up.
Rain to do things that it more urgently needs to do, because you have externalize still to come on this special episode of no stupid questions. Angela MIKE discussed how this gigantic effect comes up in our relationships with other people,
I'll bet a mystery mike maun. Mystery goes a long way.
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back to Angela Duckworth and mike minds, conversation about closure and the gigantic effect on no stupid questions. So my when it can
to this. I garlic effect. I think, in a way, the more
listing thing is what happens emotionally in my favor
thinkers on this are tim Wilson and dan gilbert
They are a psychologist who have this idea that we all have like psychological immune systems.
what I know: rights, meaning so make usually healthy psychologically. Yes, just like the body regulates its temperature and its blood press,
or as metabolism we also regulate the process
think of emotion. Oh my gosh yes raise some times were so aware. I'd should not speak. I
I'm so bad at that yeah. I think so even keeled, but I think all of us have moments where we get thrown off
here the times when I think I'm least regulated emotionally, maybe f r. The times when
I have so much to do
and am feeling immense time pressure- and I just need people to be efficient and
their job and do it well and I dont have a ton of time to explain or walk through or be patient, and
Those are the moments when I have the greatest regret, because maybe I have acted in appropriately because I'm
so under time pressure and other pressures. So in such a stressful,
situation in one word. What would you describe your mood or your motion as deep frustrations
probably the emotion that explodes out? Ok, so let's
think of a time recently where you're stressed and people
and you were not doing what they need
what to do when they needed to do it and you got frustrated and then
Ask you you're, not frustrated now. Right so tell me the story of what happens with
that prostration. So I recently
through an experience where I was supposed to meet with this point,
in this unnamed person, and I needed an introduction to this person from somebody else, and it just never happened
to the person I said: hey we set up the meeting, didn't do it again,
to have this meeting didn't do it so
increasingly frustrated, and I think I'm gonna send them attacks, that's kind of loaded and darn. It just do your job type, a thing yet and instead,
I waited and then the next time I saw the individual, I said to them: hey we're supply
to be having this meeting? Can you?
Help me understand, are you avoiding it be
as you don't want me to meet with that person, our you feel
threatened by my involvement there or you don't care. I just
need to understand why are you not doing this and I feel
the conversation for them too then explain because I think so often
we don't want to have an uncomfortable conversation or we don't want to tell them the real reason. So we just avoid so, did you get
the explanation that you wanted. I got the explanation.
Person just said he, I don't think it's the right time. I'm working on
through them? I think that will be better off if we do it this way. Ok, maybe we disagree with strategy, or maybe I agree with that strategy, but regardless I'd never been told that strategy,
and none of us on our side had so we got some level of closure, yeah
then what happened to your motion? Were you as frustrated?
before and after the explanation, or did you're forestry
diminish, which is what TIM Wilson and then gilbert. You know, that's their big theory,
that emotions linger when there's lack of closure and emotions end.
When we do have explanations about what's going on here, what happened for you? I would say that
my frustration with the lack of action diminished
then a new frustration grew that either I
if not present myself in such a way that this person felt they could be fully honest with me and frustration that they didn't feel that so it was kind of a mutual hey, if I'm not being the kind of person that
I can talk to you. Then I need to fix that or you need to give me feedback or let's figure, that out versus just avoidance, so I'll try to give an account.
thing for like how emotion works and when we continue to feel frustrated when we stop feeling for
I buy. We want to say this applies to positive feelings. To the idea
Our feelings linger whether their positive feelings like joy,
or negative feelings like frustration, they stop when we have a,
fleet accounting for what happened so like the idea of
being frustrated with this colleague. According to this theory that one
They explain to you why they didn't want, have the meeting at least us
kind of frustration should have
down cause you're like oh, I get it now you can
the new frustration, but that new
Frustration is because now you don't understand why you don't have the sort of relationship where they wouldn't it.
Told you in the first place and when
get closer on that, the prediction is that you again
feel a diminishing of that prostration. So our emotions go up and down with closure or lack thereof. That makes perfect sense route.
negative emotions. This doesn't make sense you for positive emotion for positive emotion. I mean I want closure and joy. I feel like I want that. Keep going. Oh, that was so beautiful and now
Closure- and I know your joy that seems terrible yeah, so let me too
about one of their studies, where they asked college students to read text messages from other students,
in this case there are students from the opposite sex who had a valley
we did them positively now
if you were uncertain about which stood
had actually written the message, then your positive mood,
lingerers? Then? When you do know this reminds in high school, we used to have this valentine's day fundraiser every year and you could send car
patience to someone right. Yes, okay, I was gonna, say that's what we did too. It's always carnations. It's always kind of she gets so cheap dime, a dozen yeah. Exactly
Maybe literally so you know, you could of course sign the note or you could choose not to, or you could put like an admirer whatever
exactly you know. Why is it so intriguing and have a secret admire? It's just like you have lack of closure, and you know exe
nations bring an end to emotion and I think you're right
mike. You might not want that. So know that makes sense when you phrase it that way like I get it. I also think- and maybe this is not at all the same thing but part of-
the lottery
they always say, is not actually about winning the lottery cause. The chances are so small yet, but it's when you buy the ticket there's this anticipatory effect, where you think about
all the fun things you could do, and it brings so much joy just thinking about like others, would be amazing and then it doesn't happen, but nobody ever actually expects a dab in any way.
and that whole time, when there's lack of closure, you get to marinate in your low probability, fantasies,
what you're gonna do when you, when the lottery exactly, and it's actually really really fun. You have never
played the lottery MIKE man have I live in utah, it's actually a legal here, but what you can't buy lottery tickets in outta? You don't have a lottery in utah. We do not know. Can I just say that I need to move to utah
lotteries. Okay, this is
totally different topic, but I think lottery
exploit the general human inability to understand low probability, phenomena, they're kind of evil.
The age I actually agree, and obviously all the data shows what you're saying is that their almost a regressive tax? So all of the moral arguments that I agree with our
lotteries or bad so now, I'm gonna confess something that you're gonna hate when a lottery gets to over,
one billion dollars yeah? I call it.
and in another state now and then more handsome and eu do not sit.
Or if he can, I feel, like I've been caught right now,
Who is naturally, but only because I just think its blind, no yarn fun. Have the lake opportunity, the gis,
fantasize for a little bit about.
Thank you. I know I'm not gonna win yeah! That's almost like paying the ten dollars to go, see a movie,
ten dollars to spend three days.
thinking about what I would do
with the lottery winnings and that's really fun, and then you get closer that clearly it didn't work. Yeah,
you're saying the positive emotion goes away, but it was a really fun three days and I'm ok with that and you dont totally no you're, not gonna win but I'm pretty sure pretty sure right, yeah, you're, no quantitative idiot, but you also know
probabilities and zero. So I think relate only one of my favorites
is that tim, Wilson and dan Gilbert ever did they have this study where they approach, students undergraduates, who are studying in the library and they give them an index card, and the index card has a dollar coin attached
So it's kind of like cool and unusual. Just now, the shoe conditions in the uncertain condition the card
these this vague information about the source and purpose of the money it signed by
the smile society just says like we like to promote random acts of kindness, but is this sort of like why I'm in library just kennedy a card, that's the uncertain condition than theirs.
Certain condition, students, library they get hands,
index card, it's gotta dollar coin taped to
except now, each of those
Bits of information are proceeded with a very helpful question,
I have just the smile society which you're like what its proceeded with. Who are we to smile society
and then, instead of just getting, we like to promote random acts of kindness, you get. Why do
do this we like to promote random acts of kindness.
And it asked the question for me too: maybe anchor man
standing or yet I see that so that's the clever little experiment so giving
closure now cause you may just what's gonna
ben is, I need closure, I'm a first closure. Yes, let me give it to you:
so tumult and endanger brute knew all about I gigantic effect. In fact, that was one of the inspirations for their theory and the prediction would
that when you do have this closure, where you're like. Oh, I know why I got this dollar coin and I know who these people are, that the positive emotions would end
the sooner and that's exactly what they fell, so these
students who were saying library and getting these cards than they were approached by another experimental
a few minutes later, and they are asked to complete a survey and though
who had received the certain
hard meaning the card with the questions.
Explained everything that was going on were actually
in a less positive mood
then those who had received the uncertain card that so interesting, so you're exactly right mike you can use this to
you're negative emotions go away sooner and
You can use this to make your positive emotions linger. If you can
find ways to forestall or do way closure. This is so interesting amid there's this thou
times book that we always read his kids called somebody love
Mr hatch, is this the modern family? Yes, this is the modern family hush. I want to be part of this family thou mail, you this book, it's an awesome book, but there's this
Gentlemen, lives alone never had a family and he gets this big box of chocolates.
says somebody loves you any
after they had before he ate the same crappy
which, every day and aid alone at his job, not issue lace, factory and had no friend soulis factory. I mean he portray. This is a very success to fish. But the point is the guys life completely changes
as quote somebody loves you, but he doesn't know who right yeah right he's like. Maybe it was the person I buy the paper from. Maybe it was someone at work. Maybe was the neighbours and he becomes so involve
in his community and he starts making
annie's inviting people over and all this and then the postman comes back and says mister hatch, I mean a lot of trouble. I delivered this to the wrong
house weight and then what happens gallery the book? I'm just getting I'll tell you what basically happens is ended
man. Tells everyone in town had made this mistaken that it ends with this beautiful. Like everybody,
love. You, MR hatch, and they have this party
The whole thing that changed his life in this very short fictional children story to be clever.
not knowing who quote loved him and therefore he went on this
journey to find out, could it be any of these people and to open up a whole new world to him of like opportunity to
relationships in anticipation of positive things,
a little bit of mystery mike maun mystery goes a long way. Look you do.
Give you some advice from john gottman. Gottman is the most famous couples.
Counselling slash how to have a good relationship. So what is gottman say
you from the signs of trust, emotional, atonement for couples, and it's about how couples can build a healthy trust.
In relationship, and he says negative events.
in couple relationships are inevitable,
Yes, the way relationships fail is
Something called does like arnica effect. If a couples, negative events are not fully processed, that's what he calls it.
Meant right like getting to closure. If they're not fully process
Then there are remembered and reversed repeatedly. Oh yes turned over and over in each person's mind
then he says that you found
find some way to get a kind of closure by
bidding blame to the other person, the kind of spirals
and he says the potential role does I garnett effect is colossal.
If we engage in a tune, the process
Thing right getting to closure of a name,
emotional, then or regrettable incident with our partner. We will only
finally, remember it the details of become Hayes,
He and the event insignificant
On the other hand, if we dismiss and avoid
processing,
negative emotional. Then it will not disappear. It will fester ready to be triggered again.
Got me continues. There
This is why a tuning
right getting closer to an egg.
if regrettable incident is so incredibly important, like
the viennese waiters inside our next cafe. If partners avoid processing the incident with atonement, the event and
two negative emotion will lie inside each partner like an improvised.
was a device, and I e ready to
slowed if
certainly stepped on lemme, give you
and a man and a hallelujah going back to our relationship. I have this subtle fifteen,
twenty years ago. I don't know it's a long time ago anyway. If this
person lived in new york. I lived in arizona, they said. If I move out to arizona, can we date they moved out to arizona, didn't talk to her for a year? Wait. Why
I don't know I'm just dumb reason, but the point is that we then did date end. This fight came up
over and over and now the fight about like what happened. But then you did in calling for a year, and then you can call me for you.
So like. I don't know how to take government's advice on this, because I was like I don't know what else to say. I was wrong, I'm sorry
hey, you're wrong, but it wasn't a sufficient explanation. Then, for this anonymous person, your casey. This is where I guess we're getting too. There was never closure her. This is not why didn't work out, but it never ended.
Never got closer, and I guess we? U time as I am,
workers I never gave sufficient explanation, probably cause. There wasn't sufficient explanation, because I just did
I don't know, maybe either you didn't fully understand, or your explanation was in a complete enough explanation
for that person. When I was in french class-
in high school and I ll never forget it, my
future doktor rolling said in french, of course, two components le seek to popular, nay,
to understand, is to forgive
and I never forgot it because it's so true to under
and is to forgive not to
your stand is not too for here right away.
Nothing. I think we can generalised, because it's true for positive emotions to write to cooperate.
say to fanny, which I hope this.
Correct in french, but two,
stand- is to have it finished-
whether it's good or whether it's bad
and mike. I wonder if we might ask our listeners if they have an experience of closure
or the lack of closure and what it means to them so
If you have such a story mike- and I both would love you to record a voice memo in a quiet place with your mouth close to the phone email us at s, queue at for economics, dot com
and you'll get closure by listening to yourself on a future episode of the show and mike
may also add that if you like this, show and want to support us, the very best thing you can do is simply to tell a friend about no stupid questions
can also spread the word on social media or leave a review in your podcast up. They can all
send it to someone who goes to them. Hey, listen to this. I need closer
I can't move on without it, so why don't you give it to me? Thank you. Very much
but you can send it from a random email
dress and sign at the smile society, and you know the idea what's going on and then they'll be ruminating about it for ever and ever. Let me get some closure on this conversation MIKE. We, I think, have given some
you're too schreyer about her outstanding question, I yes
For me. You know you started off by talking about the irish exit from weddings and so forth. I guess I want to ask you: do you feel
like this conversation has changed any,
thing that you might do in the future, at a wedding or otherwise.
They mention- I love closer
I'm someone who I think generally needs closure or appreciates closure?
think on the negative side. It motivates me to be kinder and make sure that my explanations are thorough and that, where you know, if some closure is needed, that we're there, I think actually the most fun part of this conversation. For me, though, is thinking about the joyful
X. It can come from also maybe not giving closure on happy things. I think that's a really beautiful thing about
ran of heads of kindness, maybe you're, just like this. Somebody left
you, MR type idea that there's so much
joy that you can create out of this is well. Do you not my very favorite thing
is about this conversation that you're going just
Is there an end and then we'll have no closer until next time? No stop now
don't start coming up after the break a fact check of today's conversation.
A conan here very excited for you all to hear the latest episode of Conan O'Brien needs a friend. Do you guys have a chance to come over to see the I'd love to see the oval come on? Let's go do right, let's do it in this episode. I sit down with president Joe Biden from the white house. If you stay connected to these things, it embarrassed you when you were a kid, not being a good athlete having weird hair or trade related. If you want this hair- and I will mail you, this wig hear my conversation with president Biden on Conan O'Brien, radio, on the sirius Xm or wherever you get your podcasts
Yes that bring holiday joy? I had to ultra beauty- and that includes gifts for yours, truly like this dyson aircraft. This statement, gift of the season perfect for law,
and for me here
moral carolina, Herrera fragrance in tools, skin care kit, where my secret santa into I got these shimmering pat mcgrath and tart eye shadow pilots from my friend John ante up for me shop. They gives that bring joy to everyone on your list. This holiday sees it also beauty
the possibilities are beautiful
whether you're throwing an ugly sweater party or at least cookie exchange walmart helps you be the host with the most for less
we don't just have everything for the holidays. We have the perfect thing for yours, no stupid,
Genes is produced by me, rebecca leads douglas and now here's a fact check
Today's conversation in the first half of the show
like an Angela wonder about the origin of the phrase irish exit or irish good bye.
They wonder if its offensive. It certainly not a compliment. The expression
supposedly based on a stereo type of irish people over imbibing, the kind of
asian being that they would be to intoxicated to say goodbye before leaving a social event. Another theory is that the phrase was
spired by the mass irish emigration during the nineteenth century potato famine. However
The idiom is primarily american in great britain
leaving without saying goodbye is referred to as taking a french leave and in other parts of the world.
Its leaving the english way or the polish exit. It seems that which ever cunt
you're in there are sure to be a xenophobic way to describe this particular behaviour. Later Angela tells the story of how psychologist bloom as organic observed that
corrupted tasks are more remembered than completed ones. Angela adds that
Restaurant anecdote is possibly more folklore than fact, and indeed she's correct. According
who are twenty eighteen biographical review of zog, our next life published in neurosciences and history? It was actually a guard
mentor psychologist Kurt Leeuwen, who was inspired by the working memory of a waiter, not say garnick herself. We should also note that, while experimental methodology
wasn't practiced in the way that is expected of academics. Today, there was more to this research than just going to a restaurant and observing the weight. Staffs behaviour sank, arnica
Leeuwen conducted an experiment involving a hundred and sixty four subjects who are asked to perform a series of tasks that were either interrupted or completed. It was in
study that the garlic effect was officially documented. Finally,
mike an angelo reminisce about high school valentine's day fund razors, in which students
send one another flowers they get.
that carnations were commonly used for this tradition because of how cheap they are to buy in bulk. The reason maybe
Can we be financial carnations,
the tories less expensive than other popular valentines flowers like roses or lilies. Although there
not literally a dime. A dozen as Angela suggests, however, is also true that
our nations have been used throughout history to represent love
the victorian era, a red carnation was given to express admiration, dark red conveyed, an entire
love or yearning a striped carnation signified referred,
salt and yellow meant disappointment or disdain. That's it for the fact check before
we wrapped. Today's show. Let's hear listener thoughts on some of our recent episodes of no stupid questions. Here is what listener law
in thomson, they saw had to say after listening to episode, one sixty two: how can you be?
kinder to yourself I do they there's a lot of
nothing to having a conversation with your friends about because things you say to yourself. I did,
I did to ask what my friend, the space, she'll she's, very self critical. We headed
the nice conversation about it and towards the intervention to her like. I have a tendency to come home from work and think about some
done that. I sadder mistake that I made in cinemas.
I think I am
He looked at me and said I would punch somebody who said that to you
They made me do up in a moment,
since then I am indeed, how may I think to myself how you moron I'd, stop myself halfway.
When I think about that conversation. Here is what listen?
Jason Adams had to say in response to episode. One sixty eight. Would you
happier. If you were more creative decision,
I enjoyed listening to your episode, but happiness and creativity, buzzing
but I had so many feelings. I corrode the songs, god he doesn't know which appeared in the movie euro trip and too
four, and despite some
says this song has not made my fortune ass. A musician
I became a freelance software engineer myself to survive this way
can be dry and tedious, and sometimes you just cannot satisfy your creative urge with the work you do to subsist. I can say
with some authority. The creative work, like other work, has its ups and downs. It's got its own tedium and agony the greater.
He'll of creative work. On the other hand, I think is control and escapism
It offers the prospect. Perhaps,
illusory
of controlling ones. Reality you can take refuge
Ever briefly, in a world of your own and here's, what was?
nor judy bait said after listening to episode, one sixty nine can we disagree better
I wanted to share that the best tool I ever learned dealing with conflict with others, was to start with. The phrase help me understand that phrase put the other person
the mindset of explaining to me versus fighting with me and helped me
to keep my mind more open to opposing viewpoints. This ultimate
They lead to more collaborative relationships with my colleagues and
and results. Hope that helps thanks. So much to those
sinners and everyone who sent us their stories and to remember
We'd love to hear your thoughts on closure, send a voice mama,
Two and ask you at freakin mixed dot com. Let us know you're,
aim and if you'd like to remain anonymous, you might hear your butt
on the show
either Stephen dubner. Again again, I hope you enjoyed this special episode, no stupid questions. There are many more with this came from just search for no stupid questions in your progress that meanwhile coming up next time.
other show from the becomes radio network this one hosted by my for economic spreading co, author, Steve Levin. His show is called
people, I mostly admire him. You'll hear a fantastic conversation with cap bo hannan, the author of eve, how the female body
two hundred million years of human evolution, the most import.
the thing we ever did
was get our hands on the levers of reproduction to overcome our most basic problem, which is that we socket making babies that's next time until then take care of yourself
And if you can, someone else to bring
video and no stupid questions are both part of the freakonomics radio network. Our shows are produced by stitcher and Ren, but radio this episode was produced by rebecca Lee Douglas we were about it is the show's production associates or staff also includes alina coleman. Eleanor Osborne, Elsa Hernandez, Gabriel roth, greg ribbon jasmine klinger, Jeremy Johnston, Julie, camphor, morgan levy, yield, carruth, ryan, kelly, Sarah lilly and zach lipinski. Our original music is composed by louis gara. If you would like to read a transcript or check out the underlying research of this or any of our shows, that is all at freakonomics dot com, as always. Thank you for listening and wow, I didn't know,
No, what do you mean he portrait of humanity that you just painted their economic radio network the head inside?
of every thing?
the.
Okey tricks to guide and vengeance shall be fast and mysterious round and battle guys and most it triggers ass guards about available
request, learn more ask our draft to see toxic events. Online accounts for ten plus, as guards virtue is ready to seventeen plus.
Yes, that bring holiday joy, I had to ultra beauty- and that includes gifts for yours, truly like this dyson aircraft. This statement, gift of the season perfect for law,
and for me here,
north carolina, Herrera, fragrance in toulouse, skin care kit, where my secret santa- and I got these shimmering pat mcgrath and tart eye shadow pilots from my friend Jan ante. Up for me shop. They gives that bring joy to everyone on your list. This holiday season old soviet.
the possibilities, are beautiful.
Whether you're throwing an ugly sweater party, or at least cookie exchange walmart, helps you be the host with the most for less
We don't just have everything for the holidays. We have the perfect thing, for yours
Transcript generated on 2023-12-22.