« The Dave Ramsey Show

Should I Work Less to Spend More Time With My Sick Wife? (Hour 2)

2020-09-09 | 🔗

Education, Savings, Career, Debt, Relationships

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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
The headquarters of websites, solutions, broadcasting from the dollar CALL Rachel studio. This is day Ramsay Show where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life. Your money, my name, is Anthony O Neill join me this, our hosting with me, is the number one number why you too high ass doktor in the world to John Lonely is in the building with me today. How are you
this afternoon, good. I, like the imaginary, accolades I'll, take em imaginary. I repeat those two myself over and over and over your name is thought the giant right, correct, great and you do have a youtube. Shall I do and you just launched a park ass as well correct, correct and if it is number one in your in your category, correct it launched number one had a good first week he had a good first, we very go oh caveat. I will take it out until the truth here I still talk to my mom every day about it and good about you. May I saw you did a a youtube but the other day. I failure tell me about the man. You know one of the things in a really teaching young people. In this general comment is to accept failing at one of the things that I've taught myself, it is ok to fail. It's ok to try something and if its
it sucks. You know one thing that I've learned when I fail. I learn when I learn I improve when I improve I grow and when I grow, I fell again, because I want to learn so I can prove so. I can continue to grow, and I think this generation, and not just this generation thing a lot of people were, scared, a failure were scared of something not working right were scattered, something looking right and honestly. I really. I don't wanna fail on purpose, but I do want to fail. So I can know what not to do again and I think the failure to scare to the sphere of felling prevents a lot of people from building wealth to creating a platform that they want to create to creating the family, went to create, and so for me at one have a conversation so as over my youtube. So mad thanks for try me in about that. A toad forgot about it
I was doing so well yeah soon great in and when I saw it. I had an idea about me just what I'm experiencing amount house, the the challenges with home schooling, the challenge the school, starting starting and then try to figure it out and there's these these. I shall fears to ride. You know my wife is a patient education, she's brilliant, using an award winning teacher and it's hard to tee junket? Sometimes, yes, and so I've recognised in my own house, there's lives. There may be a fear of. Went home, a husband struggling with this or I come home, and I'm your Duna podcast use of our commitment to hate I'm nervous about this right and so unfair. I've got fear. Failing in my relationships have got fear feeling, and these are all relationship venom. An ordinary man instil everyday those here's surface and so on, do think. I think you're right, don't think, is just millennium. I think The body is struggling with what I try: something New
This is changing. My relationships at home are changing and with just a guy to say, I'm a jump you in both feet, unknown gonna fall down, avail anonymous, grew up. That's I'm gonna learn and will be in with real Yet again, the grace help me pick me back up. Forgive me part me: Do it again to again you'll? Yes, I love a man. I love it. What are you not out there not for temperature, where, if you have some concerns about failing, if you have questions about your money about your debt about your business, about your mind, I give a scotch triple eight eight to five five, two to five general, eight, eight to five five two to five Kelly is on a false. Formalize are now open, doktor dia myself be here. For this whole, our having a conversation with you about your life, your money, whatever you won't talk about, give us again
so this guy had a glad to Virginia and have a conversation with John John good afternoon. How can doubt the DNS server, who taught you, never met? Yet? How can we help the ardor, of course, another working, almost six get a hold on hold on quite JANET. You say it. Okey are you? Ve worked really hard and made some good decisions and picked herself back up when you feel that way it's not me some good, since we shall call it but of course lies a part of it, but I want you to own year your blessing and hard work to write this true. Thank you. There again, I continue or both
These we have an aching. Oh certainly, we say first challenge with out of a hundred thousand dollars in his account and he's been appointed to want a military academy tried a question of all his money, the greater its always done or courtship Banda. Put that money into my account for him. Or do we invest their money in something else now school paid. For so did he get a scholarship or it is the army paying fort worth? these are no military academy, solar. They pay for everything, everything gardener, what a whatever you learn, accomplishment and kudos to you and your family and your child man. That's really remarkable! Awesome. So here's the thing you have an option because I'm pretty sure yes, I still need some money to to live off up. So you have two options. You can
flip that over and put into like a Rothbury anything if you want to their or I forgot the name of it, you can reach out to the school. Get a letter from the school and you can withdraw. Whatever the cost of six, it is for that semester since they, for example, farmers. Apples is fifteen thousand hours without semester. Will you can withdraw that from your five twenty nine college fund, without any tasseled down penalties, because that was going towards college so you have to talk to your smart best approach. Maybe I'll get! You are the proper paperwork. If you want to do that Yes, I can still use that to maybe pay for some of these cool expenses that that are not covered by the programme, but like eating. If each decide who live off campus one day, I'm or you can go ahead and invest set into Roth our right either options are good, but if your site can get through four,
years, is a five year providing more idea of of without touching at money at all. I honestly do enjoy a really like the idea of just Goin hadn't flippin, that over and investing that money, so that we can have something go ahead to start working towards his retirement. John interfere college degree. It is a five year military command, yes resident in a nine year, she would have whenever we invested no one can be afraid, work which
I assure you they will pay, will take all fear of worked out of him at the military Ojeda. He's gonna have to work, especially in an even in a military for the five years that he's committed to program. So many congratulations on a giant you and you're doing your wife have raised sounds like a very smart young man. I loved emphatic going ahead and just talk. Gonna followed a smart vessel pro and you say: ok, how can we move our college fund over to a growth sought mutual funds? this way we can go ahead. I had this invested into him down the road I made from their man dashes. That's awesome remained but gradual. Tell you sign Philip me up when you too, because his features looking so so bright may well. Bob jubilant eight to five five did
Is that the deal myself here? What today Ravisher taking your questions, give support technique
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mayors who dare to your boy and ever ever since day, one, I guess. Even before we were married, we ve been silent. Beheld build a house one day. Work were up a little bit about two hundred thousand dollars. We we have about thirty thousand dollars in a market. Speak and the way we don't know should we should we be doing more with two hundred thousand than just put it in a faint ear or what will? What should we do? This bars risk version. What now, what are you doing with two hundred thousand hours are Arthur or we look an import purchase, a home, We want to build one day if you want to build, you know when you went to build or cry like about or about ears. Ok, cool, great and you're gonna pay, Ass work is due in two thousand as a lot of money, especially not in taxes. So Guess I'm waiting for five years. You won't. Let me just drop a half a million just build the home cash, well
figuring somewhere around three to three three hundred fifty dollar ok sounds good so here today you gonna. Keep that liquid. I want you depart. I didn t like the money market account or you can do. What I do is part that, on it I say this account to working in little more interest. The more return you dont want to. Lock it up. You don't wanna, put into some type of investment account retirement account because you gonna pay penalties in taxes. We pull it out. So now I want to gladden part then, to like a money market, or you can go a line which I suggest and which, in which what I do is going in and just do. A high Yoda savings account that today you get in here We would like one point: five right now: many market cows. I point seven to one one now. So what are the city rate said? They pretty low city, raise our new city, raise Amadou cities, you know those it has caused certificates, depreciation. It doesn't really go anywhere. You know from our cities it s just a piece of paper and
honestly when it comes to purchasing a home for a down payment, you won't keep it liquid gotta, go that way whenever they say, for example, he didn't it. He doesn't have a house at a policy becomes across something on January that he likes for a great deal that he has a cash liquid to make that move. If he likes it up, I maybe it's just gonna- be a lot like there. So we don't do cities we don't do binds. Would I do not have that? We just sit here for especially for savings and purchasing a home. We sit here. We just put into a mighty marketing go level over the lover. Love it Next phone call? Yes, sir, that's go to Hawaii and I have a conversation here with Eric Eric good afternoon. How can doubt the DNA help pages hazel? Are you set me up question my I've been married for you, I'm on top
more like concepts and she has single saw meal, so I'm workin on women's working in household schebitz, small disability check, so I'm working like one part time, jobs on a part time job, I'm tribes, Do you mean just like Calpers get by, but my wife is Willing warning he extended time at home because she feels like her is getting worse and I'm wasting my time trying to pay off our debt, so you're extra jobs that your take ah, my no hot Honolulu wise, been just beat up really bad with the tourism industry. Shutting down, sir. You work in a couple porthole.
On top of a full time jobs to pay off debt. Or are you work in a cup of part time jobs? He delights on milk in the fridge also, I am. I can part time jobs during the day. It's like thirty two hours for five days and then, in the mornings. I do his paper out An that's like you just enough and it goes along with, like our plan, to turn to pay down this dead like her her car payment and then
Like two thousand and credit cards are cheaper, anxious to get to get paid off. Shore Eric for managing questionnaire was more important. Your wife, your marriage, or making more money to pay dead off quickly. Wife is more important, a love your hustle cod into the day, Ramsay show so we we love harem people. How to do this alone. Do that. I want to do this, so I can get out of debt absolutely, but we will never see here and tell you that paying off debt fast is more important than being there and walking this journey and spinning time with your wife.
I don't know what the future holds for your wife tomorrow, but I do know something she's here today and your wife needs you more than they did in a bill collectors. I'm not saying to start working, I'm not saying stop going up to the journey, but what I am saying is start spending more time at your wife. And how the conversation with as a bay? What does it look like for you? I love that Anthony. I love the idea of say and sit down and in imagining a plan to gather cause more that this phrase more time can become endless, and the phrase I just need you around. I just need you present need you here. I'm sometime As a matter of attention in a matter of focus less Then it is a matter of. I just want your body sitting in this house right, so I think me and Anthony just nailed. It thinks it now you with your wife until you lover- and you know, she's in pain and she's hurting and she's struggling through a lonely and at the same
You guys have some math problems that you have to deal with come up. With a solution that your co create together work on this together. What is me being around home in honouring you at the same time, trying to hustling grind to end help her be of tangible solution? There, not just the aim, or more more more in it then he says man, you get one wife you get one may I you get one one you and finding balance between what your responsibilities are and that anxiety have about that too? Does no credit card verses, your wife's things, of missing you and feeling like she's, not a priority round home. This is messy tough duration, so I love give him the conversation that there was an end. Correct me if I'm wrong not to take your Mary, yet adopting an expert in this field give Eric what it, what are the first to questions here
Ask when he sits down his wife like? How does he set this up properly to where she she feels, as if she's she will be? heard and that he he sees her value and he understands her. So I think the first questions. The first questions. Not really. It is not a question. Its thanked, personal statements. As I hear you, I love you then the second than then he's gonna, ask a question which is help paint me a picture. What does time with you look like what am I not delivering here? What is gonna make you feel connected. And just listen and then don't try to solve it allowed a lot of extra hoppin back well, you know, I'm really do stop right and they were excluded. Doubt is: is his wife being hard on him? Is he tried distract himself from her pain by going and getting more work and more busy, including outside goals at his goals, are not their goals right, but just
in a conversation with a love you- and I hear you and I want to be there for you, you can hear his voice losses. He loves his wife in it. He hates you hear her hurting and he also hates the debt, may the Damosel the car they may need to make some other sacrifices financially, that the they haven't considered before that I could work it off and I guilty my own life of hiding of getting addicted to being busy and using those goals, business goals and hiding goals, as reasons do not sit with. So am I One thing I think the very first. I think I know that first Ministry: any bad has is his family, a priority thing else after your family up to live up to your husband after kids. I come second, so American here is clearly we want you get out again, but we also want you to keep
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going out Cleveland hold high overhead becomes a year with brandy in Britain it have to do it. How can I do to be- and I hope they I think, we're taking my god my life, and I were working on baby, you were to get it up and currently beside the house, we have fifty six hours in back looking about making it after that is in between two credit cards and thirty. Six thousand is between two cars. Currently estimated pay off big, isn't until December twenty, twenty four, but actually just registered for school. To use my g, I bill as a veteran, I want to pay me a housing allowance also. So, if I include all of that money towards the that its bill, not until March of twenty twenty three for the debt pay off day. I'm just wondering if there's something else, but I can be doing to trying to that bit off donor.
Maybe even using the my four along K now, if that was something that would work We don't touch retirement plants. Brother came when did the key thing? that I'm always cell in people s patience, part where dedication impatience. You know it it it it's. Unfortunately, here's a truth. It's it. You know tat to get any, but it's gonna. Take you look at a time to get out of it a lot less water to process here, because twenty twenty Ray sounds far, but it's not that far wash your household income right now I'm working on my face. Our I make about eighty thousand a year by I travel for work and I get a lot of travel benefit to its often over six years. I had just don't have an exact amount, eighty care year and your total day out as it is. What again, I'm sorry about your total debt? Again, thirty, six thousand to night.
Exclaimed Dan around your cars will Connachar. Do you have my driver twenties? Jim Nissan Rogue and my wife has twenty sixteen clear Toronto. Twenty six in Kiev surrender. Do you have any cash? In the end, the bank? Right now We have done that in our emergency funds from baby step one, but that at the moment so got. Why came savings this great city fallen the now, this rogue, how much is derome worth I am not exactly sure when I bought it about two years ago. It was actually Solberg fifteen hundred below blue book, but I've had a two years, I've been in truth under benders that weren't my fall. An oath bumpers actually need to be repaired. Side would imagine it's gonna be lower and lower value. Now, so his brain. How old are you in your life? I'm thirty one she's twenty thirty one, twenty way, twenty two sharp millennials
The very first thing here what we're gonna do and darted data someone get thoughtfulness as well. I want you and your wife to sit down to night before the end of this week. I want ya to come up with a clear vision to why. You want to get out of debt and I want to say- and I want to get into debt, so I can do this, not an old giddy. If you follow me- and everyone knows this right now- no alighted get deep. When you asked me, you answer the question: why ask us Why again, and then ask yourself why again, because I think the very first thing is you need is a- clear vision that you and your wife can stick to whatever that vision. Is you stick to that? The number two you just
hadn't worked the desktop while which is baby set. Number two. You already done, babysit number one, which is a thousand emergency fine babes at number two is pay off all your dead using their debt snowball case, so you that to credit cards you gonna, pay. Those off! You get your car note Juno pay those off now you have two cars that you can honestly speed up some stuff bre. If you all those cars Brandon and is go by to cash cars, so I wouldn't have a problem. For example, saying: oh, it next to two months by you- and I will vote against this stack up. Some extra cash wouldn't put away five, you know, six having Gran we're gonna, buy to cash guards and sell these cars so that where we can get it, that sooner pay off this fourteenth, thousand hours a credit card debt. We can also be debt free by next summer if we were really worth the same color, We didn't arrest of next year we can save more cash to go by new were vehicle.
You see what I'm saying branded I guess that's! If I'm? U, I'm having a conversation with my wife, I'm getting a clear vision and then once we get their vision, we're gonna walk backwards. Who want to write down all the baby steps we're gonna down? Ok, what can we do to get there? Hey DE? Are you call it a selling these cars? Yes bail get out, get ok coup that sell these cars, but then too much? Is my a minimum payments on this stuff. This distant globally cash a cash car now we're out yet about the Abbe a lot of money there. You know they now, but could be. The debt relief workers system, which eighty k a year John, I mean that they can be added yet problem by February. Of next year. I know my my close friends who are in the military. They love their car neighbourly. Do they love their car day, really work there butts off the day they like DR and I think in Europe. And you can unload a big chunk of this debt, real quick, even it
upside down, and you got to get a small gap loan there. You still find yourself in a much better situation. Almost almost half right- and then he's, making a killer salary a couple or things everyone, talk about is why she's staying home is our seas and wishing to part time job. Maybe kids there and here's another thing again developing veterans? I've worked with over the years, my buddies and military. They are driven. They know how to live gotta problem solving problems. Go accomplish it. They d get it done, and it's hard to look at a province. Isn't that three years now Sometimes you, like you, mentioned really just gonna- that patients you just gotta, keep chipping away and dig in and dig in clear that hole up and eventually it's gonna work out. Eventually, man he's making thousand dollars plus another twenty on the road he's gonna get a promotion. Broken heart, it's gonna do it will turn they ve always gotta, keep plugging a lamp looking to implement what you know. One thing sat
I find so interesting. I get a lot of questions, especially when hunk Chris hoping to now. We hit the road to a financial, peace, live and events in people come up to us outside ass, a man in how do I get out to get quicker? I'm doing this Your miss scheme up dualism duet. I want again to get quick, unlike it doesn't happen that way. If you got into a quick but they do not want to be patient to get out of it, and so then, what I find is- we'll come out there come out here and do these interested things to get out of debt and then what happens if they put themselves further into debt? Further, two more issues because it trying to cheat the system there trying to cheat the proven proven prove in plant, and you guys I do not work, You ought to do that. I just during the
and growth in that slow plan. Yes right, I'm telling you right now and I'll tell you yeah. This is why we are here, because we don't want you to take a short cuts. We don't want you to fall short of anything right now. I want you to ask yourself something what if you never again had to question what to do with your money? Never again. This is possible for you and you can fill in control and actually made progress. You just need the right plan, not just there
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You guys there's no need to cheat the play. It feels good, not get it right. I get it. I just want to get this thing out of here once once you listen to enough David realize what a monkey this is on your back, what a pain it is! You want he's gone, they ain't. Oh, here's a truth: Gaza must say Brandy, Rancho Dave, Ramsay Avenue John did only Chris Holger Rachel proves Chrissy Right call me. We shouldn't be you're, not one party you Be your number one person we'll get you should be the guy, the young, lady, occasional gonna, get myself out of it going to do this. I was gonna work. The player that day Ramsay the team teach, but I'm going to do it. You're thinking you're than Europe get fired up. I'm fired, I see I'm coming.
This is the day Ramsey. Here there. If you ever hear the mass fields, sea area, let me tell you why she come by studio. Does we have some of the best cookies?
Every Sharma, when I go out there to lobbying, I get one of the best chocolate chip in ages. Had this new cookie doubted, IE and nobody cause has strawberry in something in a taste so good. So I would encourage you if you're ever in a natural tendency area. Not only can you come by hearing here day, but here one of the personalities, but you can get greedy with the beautiful beautiful cafe with with with great drinks with great cookies and is a great staff of people, so we will have a lovely for Jagger. Yes, we will love to have to come back and please Charmante cookies, tell tell them Anthony O Neill said: try one of the cookies John, how you doin from good
tired, tired, tired, but we're doing well in and continue plugin man just make you I'm door. Well, I'm just excited just to be here with you on this beautiful, Wednesdays Midweek, I'm excited about the rest, it is weak and brothers getting married this Friday, older brother, younger brother, younger brother, under Otis, are run the things of my family. You you produce. Ok, so tell me of of Adsum relationship conversations in the past, where it's a hard thing for the
her brother, the elder sister, when the younger brother, sister, Mary first, I feel much Newhart Manasseh is an interesting and exciting for them. You know because my younger sister, whose thirty whiny vat she married my amazement brother in law, had four Maisie chocolate. Babies and there are viral in doing suffered apple and not a tab stuff and then a little brothers gettin married hopes in her life, ok lower, but I feel good cause. I'm I'm I'm excited that he found his best thing and I know that you know God is going to submit my best thing in due time. Bomb is excited about a turnip, my brethren and have a good time this weekend, what I'm celebrate his life celebrate, what God has done his life, very cool man very go so I've gotTa Arkansas and have a conversation with Amber Amber good afternoon how kinda today- and I hope Thank you for your offer taken my call, I think
well, I wouldn't have thought that's right, but a european voluntary service. Thank you and I decided to bar how, about an hour for eighty four thousand dollars, and never did I say though I would become an attic. I got really far behind Mamma how the work is almost being foreclosure well I would now five you clean two and a half years current on my home because they said what are old and loaded with the back of my mind already firing at is that it went below three point, one interest rate, because I have done the Ba Ba Long and one day
We it wanted at one point ten percent on Thursday and coloured in firearms then let me offer my about a week now and if you know, talking about with this year working Party- well man with authority- and I didn't know with the interest rate where they are now get ivory finance for So right now you add a four point: wine, if I'm not mistaken here. Ok, co and what's your outside of your mortgage right now? What's your other debt? Look alike thirty thousand their thirty Kate in debt and wash your gross income a year right now Well, I'm a movie where and near London my leg
well around fifty seven Catalan, seven K, newlywed Congrats on recently by a in also, can we just take a quick second to a cell great you on being clean layer live year. I was waiting till the end, but Amber may less five and you from Nashville, where that is awesome. I ass a mere. I think it's just des that's the most important thing, because we weren't sober. If you won't work, clean, we couldn't have this conversation today, so man, yes MA, am keep it up. I expect to see another five another fifty years of this lifestyle, but let's get back to how we can help you out here. Soap was a mortgage payment. My motives payment is well worth eight hundred and forty six dollars, I believe, a nine hundred and forty six thousand mouth. And what are you here with you,
fifty seven hey. What do you see a month which are net pay monthly. Well, probably about us about is it about one that's our guy! You know about that. Maybe it's basket. I ask it. Here's my thing here here: here's my thing: and you have thirty thousand thousand dead. You make him. Fifty seven k your mortgage famous at eight forty six. Fifty right now I don't have a problem, but you looking into refinancing your mortgage as long as there's. No, there is no fees, there's no penalties. None of that could you are paying a four point. One right now: interest rates are going as low as two point. Five two point: three all right now, and so our deftly going too far
Churchill mortgage and look into options, but here's my thing since you are already in the mortgage of honestly, wouldn't have a problem which you focusing on baby set number two go ahead and clearing out all of your debt not ended up at all on the desk, snowball from smallest, a large is getting out of debt and again they are fully funded emergency fund and then from near, and then I wouldn't have you having a problem there looking at now, if you want to go to war set now get that down to a fifteen year mortgage, that's what we teach and I have a problem with that What if I was in your shoes and if I was your husband, Saint Baino Wet, were already in the mortgage, ok, and so how do we go in here? and just knock out all this debt, because that's the number one concern is becoming dead free but now
forward. Churchill mortgaging the say you know what hey we can go ahead and gets reef. I get your get your interest rate down to get down to a fifteen year mortgage desk at S cool now, you're more experience, gonna go up. You're gonna go from eight forty six to about maybe right around thirteen fourteen hundred bucks because you are going down which is great cause. We won't you want you in debt as well as short as possible. But I would really prefer wash your debt was the other thirty K. Was cars cards that would have known about your thinner. I actually found down, because I was gonna try to get a lot he's gotta pay out money. I don't know, and I dont want, we don't do he locked luck. No new do so. What was the other? Thirty thousand dollars have we ever for twenty nine, You know me:
what's that corner one guy was the colonel, for that I to do in our money. What else and then we have a more vital period because the industry, the criminal money flows, procreation I'm gonna motorcycle. So you could be a part of a christian organisation. We are. We rapid eager aluminium, for Jesus do ok, Amber here's the deal have you got through Amber? Have you got you financial peace University, download the buggy. I'm having a really hard time with that? I certainly can cause you're going to do it so nation of your service? here's a service and celebration of your five years. Sobriety? and as a wedding gift from Anthony O Neill Dave, Ramsay and John Aloni.
Give you a year subscription to Ramsay plus for free, gave a loud, laugh power in a little banquet. I want you to use it. You're gonna have to go through financial peace only get on a digital class or if you have a local on there in Arkansas. I want you to use the budget. And I want you to ask the coaching questions as you need them want you to use it. Got a lot of cool successes on your bill ever less for years and now you're tackle that debt sell the car sales are you ready for the home, their value said the king S, the copper man, America. Thank you, John join me this hour when it think our producers, I've been social producer, Kelly Daniels, and you know why you, America, suffer some Santa Claus Yacht law. Absolutely amazing! I love you. This is the day. Ramsay show
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Transcript generated on 2020-09-10.