Actor Matthew Rhys feels blank about being Conan O’Brien’s friend.
Matthew sits down with Conan to talk about living out his boyhood fantasies on Perry Mason, passing down his Welsh heritage to his son, and the one thing he’d wish for besides world peace. Later, Conan and his team get to know the next Golden Ticket winner in a fated meeting.
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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say these things, hello, monies name
but I feel blank about being coding, o Brien friend working below and welcome too,
Conan Brien needs a friend kind o here, but I guess it goes without saying. I do have a distinctive voice
not saying it's my my best feature, but you know it. When you hear
I've actually had many people in situations just
you're my voice somewhere and say cones here in this room yeah, you do have a very distinctive vs, Gunnar pinched red
you're so mean to yourselves. I am I am, but now you have a great pied cast voice. Will. Thank you. That's that's nice. It's always been the. They aspect that I was always envious of other people's broadcasting voices and I always said didn't, love mind but dumb, but over time you know. I think people have gotten used to it. The way if you were
Gunnar Factory with a horrible, loud machine and eventually don't hear that machine anymore.
I'm joint is always by a sort of session sown, and I see a nice to see you and my my good friend and will pretty sir extraordinary Matthew, Goarly and an equally Matthew today got a sofa.
Former do you prefer Massey were Matt. I think I prefer man
I feel like matzoh, boring name but Matthew feels to fanciers yeah does yeah yeah. I
call, someone Matthew. Unless that person insisted they be called Matthew order. Trouble like my day, ass young ass, you, yes Mattie James Goarly. I don't care who started it. I'm gonna finish right,
All right, you are ever in a fight not only to fight you don't just area with my sister, you and your sister used squabble a lot. We really close relationship now, but man we used a tangle yeah. We still I mean I was one of six and especially their
so my brothers and I used to fight quite a bit. Who would win? Will that would be Neil, ok, the oldest, and he actually had? What are they call it strength? He had strength
and it was really strong in big. He would
laugh and Luke, and I away at him our punches just bouncing off of him like it,
You were throwing paper planes at a battleship,
you just be laughing and we would be
Pummeling him with their tiny fists, look like cornish hens and they would just bounce off kneel and he would laugh needs.
with our heads and slammed together. I think I'm very sorry, you're not exactly do not go together and then toss us aside and tat. He had a great this dismissive derisive laugh, but I had a fine day yesterday. Witches- and you know this sooner, but we were too,
I raise money for this charity, and so I got
gather with so my old ban me
Jimmy in Yep and make merit on base and James Worm worth and drums, and we just were banging out these
songs and I was on guitar. I was having a really good time, and this is the.
kind of people I have in my life. I've had people say: will you ever think your ego is going to get the best of you and I think, I'm surrounded by such talent,
cruel people can always deflate me in the perfect way. So I was really with recorded a few weeks ago. He recorded that was really happy.
and I thought he'd is actually sounds pretty good. This is it
Chuck berries long. I was really kind of happy with their nails. Like hey, I really like this, and I say this
to mad o Brien, no relation, but the head writer on the show allowance
other people to say just check this out until we know what you think you ve brought with me and all he did was sent me a link to a commercial and I pressed on,
and it was a bunch of guys, my age Roccanera with guitars, and it was a fine though it was a virus or a commercial, and they were there alone via growth. And the thing is you don't know what it is the first, so it's these guys, roughly my age around a guitar and a guys.
I can turn is icon viewing. None of what are we gonna do more by astern. There's someone else s in a way in everyone's is always perfectly ethnically mixed year. So it's a guy he's got a friend the same ages me and they're all the same at different races and nationality like their chairmen and having a really good timing and make it to the course
Why do we have enough? No man was so hilarious, so mean, and all my excitement about jamming with my band for a week to teach phasing out all was brutal brain last reform. But those are the people in my life. You know that
It's no matter how big you get you go.
Oh man, it's like ok, but also I want to point out. Even if I hadn't succeeded and had failed. I think that have gone out of their way to me.
me. Then they combine the alley that I live in an Billig nice alley using anything in the area are in or is that someone else's?
come on guys cure. Love now has only the light. Does runaway marrow Brian who is not related to you acting like here.
I have, but also heed, that's what any other writer on the show it have done there. What if he really thinks you need viagra? What if that was the message, what works? Well,
this will be of life. First of all, I ve made it very clear
to everyone around me. I need viagra
well anyway. I thank God that I have that I'm surrounded by a staff the days is
very willing and very talented at humiliating me yet weak.
be grounded. While you know me Jimmy grounded. You then grind me down into the ground. You don't just keep me at ground level that you actually grind me down hundreds of feet
beneath the soil. We can make it work in polarize me I own. I am thrilled. I am thrilled about our guest today. He is scary to
I did and charming. He won in Emmy for his portrayal of russian spy, Philip
Jennings in the ethics seriously. Americans he's also appeared in,
films as a beautiful day in the neighbourhood and the post and stars in the HBO Series, Perry, Mason
I'm just all kinds of thrilled that is with us today.
I ain't going say he's one of my fifteen
in man, crashes, honey. I obtain yet
actually. I think I have what twenty five men crashing give alive. I think I think I have a crush on most good. Looking man- yes, yes, this might mean something anyway.
Matthew, Reese. Welcome this.
is a, I think, a first which is, I went out of my way to book you on the path
cast myself. We ve had
pleasure talking too many great guests, and I think we ve just been trading on whatever have achieved in the last twenty seven twenty eight years in this
pretty business of ours, but you
where someone that I was at a dinner with Mr Rollin Jolly, as is one of the giant brains behind Harry Mason, when my absolute Lee, my wife and I adore that show that show an absolutely love it and I started singing your praises at the table and saying there's a man. I've always wanted to meet and Rollin said. Oh, he so funny. You'd love talking to him and I was sitting there thinking. If only there was a way
You idiot ask him to do your podcast and I,
I go down a shame, spire level, he won't do
when it comes down to say how we feel about me. My friend shall say I feel blank yoga something out spot on up and I'll. Be
in doing so, and then I reached out to you. He gave me your email and I personally reached out. I took the chance and said: would you do the pied cast? This was by the way six years ago,
three Mason. I knew you
eventually blade airy. May I love the long game you play. I see that I play always sixty five just moves ahead. Yes, no, I knew was very excited to talk to and I sent you
an email and you wrote me a hilarious email back and I thought oh I've got a contrived a way to make Matthew Rhys my friend against his will, and I think I've done
it's worked, thank you so much bits in real pleasure,
we meet again take care when I saw you. Thank you. Thank you. So much tat was Matthew. Recent trust me that's about as much as you want to hear from this man. Tortoises dull really have a cruelty underneath the no one ever you know. I had to sit here and listen while they were you
only on the line for about five minutes before with my staff. Before
I entered the room, I'm shaved and powdered before each pike
I can say is thank you and but I heard you just being cast.
he did with how much everyone loves the Americans and they they left
I may say interest house
world, everyone is to talk to you and I was filled with envy envy and re.
So that no one set. No one in this group is ever that happy now. So much excitement about you, yeah, that's the Irish in you and they re always been envious of the Welsh. I think. Well,
You know, I will tell you something, there's something more exotic to me about what
else than Ireland I risk. I know I risk hissing off all the Irish yes, but where a dime a dozen in this country but whale
and that an incredible timber that you all have in your voices and I'm assuming its all of you, I'm assuming its
the men and women walking around with Richard Burton heads, yes to set out exactly how it s something you wanna babies born. It has a full Richard Burton at fifty head. Yes, yes, I think I ve been. Doesn't I force it to stop smoking glue lies here, but you know that Irish, we, like I say, we're just oh, my god enough with the
Irish, I'm not out there on Saint Patrick Stay, cheering on the Irish, I'm I'm hiding in a corner, saying I'm sorry, but I do think my God, the Welsh and
whale such a romantic place, and so many terrific actors and some good talents have come from there. I just think of I think of how that's where I need to be that's the
I met, I need to be living in. My assistant will tell you. I cannot I'm living in LOS Angeles, and I don't belong here. It's cool
bring me the sun people walking around with v shaped torsos and people
with teeth, and I dont want ice. I'm supposed to be back in Ireland S with rickets and it yes well, let's rickety had to be shed. We're always told me, don't you
I mean at least you're living in you're living in Brooklyn is accurate. Bs saw I get. I get my fail of kind of gray drizzle.
The two you know which is like crack cocaine took out. So I am, I am lucky when me, no one that kicks in eggs or come alive, but the summer months I certainly challenging for me now I'm told-
that you you had to evict a teenager
from his room yeah, so that you could come into the room. Yes- and I join me on this zoom call and be part of this podcast. Yes out. What did you ask beforehand if you could use this sacred space? Now, always
the small breakdown in communication. I'd spoke to his mother about to idleness. I spoke to him. He
it famously and notoriously has a strong signal in the house, which is why I ve evicted him, but he was added, I assumed, as I've done.
daily basis that some kind of
indication be relayed to the children had inside burst in and throw him out
sounds like you weren't, maybe the most gentle about evicting yours
and from the round now, what about his reaction to you, I'm sure he said father or potter. I dont know what the Welsh equivalent is
I understand your needs and I vacate the space in your honour, as that is what you say. You are very close. You very close to its exact wording. It was an olympic level dismissal from from from him very easily said those you know, the classic Cairo attacked a bit of a shuffle. Many call me dick under his breath
but he said it.
that lyrical way. Yes, poetic way. Yes, it was. It was as if he was channeling Dylan Thomas, it was remarked. I know the word dick in the original draft of it a child's Christmas in Wales, yeah Dick is used nine times. Yes, you're right, you're right, you spot on with the numbers. They, however, three times, referencing algal Richard and one,
I'm Uncle Richards debt levels either. Is why yes, yes, he had a pass. He had a pass at everyone thought we see what he's doing and then he went out of his way to stuff it up our
Thank God, you tell me about you, I'm I'm
We want to know you grow up in Wales.
and something at an early age. You must realize you have.
ability you have talent, I've talked to many people
the UK or Kelson. They say that they watched a lot of american television. That was the same with you as well to thirty two
However, the warehouse as opposed to discuss the Irish, the coronation Manx, if you want to get into it.
there they have. This one element is the
That's in Wales, in incredibly revered and and
encourages. It is pressing you so twice a year that is national festival where all school children have to compete being it in
the tree in dancing poetic recital in any colleagues. This thing dates back some kind of pre too
because today age so there's always
is very big onus, especially the well speaking whilst of this thing,
could be a step forward, which is this enormous festival. Twice you away, your kind of pushed kicked
on two stages and forced to perform its like being a hockey player,
are in Canada, the it when you're in the fetal stage they give you a stick and you have to do. This is the same for Wales. It's you have to get on the stage we have to see which
got in you. Can you do it, but tat? Would you
watching at home, when you go home and you watch television was our awful crap
America seeping through this brilliant one.
Before culture, you haven't. Yes, that's that's right, I'm guessing win yea air and can cry again end of broadcast gaps. Buzzer xo at four o clock. We go watch a Wolf Baywatch, the
A team Stasi unhurt
he's what hutch you're watching really old seventeen, but
you're a young man. You were watching stir skin hutch, maybe thirty years after we had made it yes and you know what we always. They have to get rid of the absent jump on some form of livestock right down to the village hole where it was hand cranked on a project to screen through those people kind of shouted what they thought might be the audio. If those are you
right your own in the child's memories. We are all about you
riding a large hog down the road to the local you no sin of whatever they called the cinema drove yeah we're zone pose a crank and you are
Starkey and how yes, with no sound with no, yes, I'm told, is the way to watch
durski, and I would agree as you did. You think when you
we're watching that? Obviously, everyone
strain for the stage and you're, so
well aware of all the great Welshman that of that have conquered the screen? Were you thinking
I've gotta get to America, America's where I want to go, or were you quite happy to stay where you work? What,
This is kind of strange dichotomy because, because-
as we have this huge kind of stage history in- and you know everyone
everyone is aware of ever. Does it intend to appoint when I finally decided you know to kind of time given to go professionally. My pimps, like
This is what you do for fun your path,
your part time, you don't use professionally so, but what America held was this. It was incredibly exotic. You you own. The cinema, you owned television, you and those two mediums and without the king came this,
Incredible tentative
he's up. If that's a word,
and it was something very of something so soon saw the lure of of America.
especially Hollywood
was was enormous to me because
the stages, but I knew but those
So what was very of to me, I've loved you work in the Americans
and I love carry Mason. It is somewhat ironic to me that you have this fantastic accent. You have had to
an american accent for most of his very visible work that you have- and I was thinking you're.
getting to the point soon, where I really feel like you can say, look whatever role I play. I use my axe and from now on
care. What, if I'm Ronald Mcdonald selling hamburgers
to be in it with this beautiful. Whilst I sent and no one can say anything at this point mass you do that you could demand that I've been demanding for years, known as listen to my mind, a turning point,
yes, not secured me long believed the most powerful person
in show business, why anyone would laugh at that. I have been around a long time and I have the power to get an email. I have the power to get. Matthews email seems like a robotic response that may well have been a bought. Yeah,
still you slightly disappointed that it was an AOL account. I why? Yes, I. Why is that? Why you said the telegram? Yes, that's. Where are the telegram, and then I didn't understand why you needed my American Express number
happily handed over. Yes, I I thought this is it.
true friends, very, very kind of you, but you know
I had an experience
years ago I was taping comedy peace on the set of house with Hugh Lorry and
was I think, for the for the enemies, and he
needed to be Doktor House, and I said
Oh she lorry on the sat. He had a one of his ethical lighting, one of his lighting people or a cameraman spoke up. Who was
also from England, but he was using his accent and you Laura said you ve got to stop doing that Nigel it throws me, I don't do that and he said that he had. He told me quite candidly that he had banned I'm making up the name Nigel, I can remember, but I think it'll do in February and our right, you re an array of Austria that along scarf flowed in Britain.
And I ve Said- Nigel no cut it out stop because I've gotta stay in this american accents. You must
of that same,
situation. Where I mean, does it ever get just bloody tired that you have to say come on, let's get out of here. I sell that Dame what she's up to now. That's not really because- and it was never more so than in in Pay Mason, what
I always did as a kid was growing up in in the
the back out on the schoolyard. We friends is yours,
impersonating Americans you're, always impersonating in America known. I don't know
before we know- and you know, goes into school you to play down to Lobby- is wasted lobbying us out of the servant. None so zone, I am. I live in. Memories are like a friends of mine. Doing these terrible american axes. Remember going
terrible american accident. You can't be Ba brackish when it acts in
you can think what I tell you. It is a pity that it takes you to chatter here. That's why he's Nigel always showing growl yeas he's everywhere? You could smell the tobacco smoke from his pipe, damn damn him, but so who are you pretend to be a? But this is about you pretend to be American Moody stirs year from the past years. We who, who did you liked a chance so well so this is,
there is a danger for me sometimes because I attributed to Mama pairs of a musical and I think, a musical. You will always help you and with axes
but sometimes in the early days, and allay when it's going for audition and I'm the excellent by working, I'm just tryin impersonate person, people on the person. Like always,
to his was George Clooney, which is kind of dangerous, because he has been very distinct speech pan right, so sometimes you, the dangers. You'd you'd fall into impersonation, in mimicry, as opposed to kind of turnip, generate
the organic, but then when it
two petty Mason actually mean
Africans was the greatest, where the greatest
job any any
non american Arctic and asked for in that he was. I was playing an alien pretending to be american. My ass, if my ever failed I'll, just go worries these all minorities rushing to shut up nigel- then I'm not nice. In these. These he's he's from Russia by way of whale yeah laptop,
I mean Perry Mason. It was like the
such an enormous amount of of boyhood fantasies coming alive when I added
travel beyond a cigarette afflicting the cigarette and I'm trying not to personally Humphrey Bogart, because some of those lines which I blame, Mr Jones Ball with- that
who had kind of in oh, they would pepper it with this. Thirties speak this tool. Yes, I don't have to go now. Listen here, sweetheart in oh, so it was hot, because I'm not not to do that. You have the kind of reminds me self as an active, suspend making a real person. You know
I have to say I have no ones
ever been interested in seeing me act, but I
I have to say, like you,
when I watch Perry Mason, I think this is the kind of raw that would bring out the
child in me. So much because you weren't
fedora you ve got the beat up. Let
with the tie and yours.
smoking and you
drinking scotch its. It looks like it would be
such a blast, the moon. This add to this add to these moments way. You do think, that's every dream you ve ever wanted. It wishes to play. Those kind of you know those, but
got plans
when it comes to the moment when you smoking a herd, cigarette and drinking called t, you sort of go
This is discussed. This is called, tease, not whiskey, and then you realize you just want to be those characters. You know she went to be an actor playing. The part you actually I wanted to be those people. Last minute, though I did have a moment, Mason was, I was not quite so quiet
what I wanted, because I'm still I've still just pretend,
as you know, is as close as you can ever be, but still
element? It's like when you, you go shark fishing,
the first time I mean you going or you know you ve always pretending to be robbed, showing jaws young. Then you realise at now. I just wanted to be a shock fishermen, I don't. Why aren't we Robert Shore, pretending right airing wanna? Be that I want to be someone who's at the aquarium
seeing a shark behind
seven feet of glass, yes, but still acting like I've got the balls of Robert shock me ass, though, still acting like you and me sharp. Well, you know, look is called dead eyes, but it's behind a feat of glass and I'm eating cotton. Candy yeah sweetly protect it. I think I could be the beginning of something. I see that the kind of the pre quote as to how how quaint became king
He went to an aquarium. Yes, yes, recent gotten grandly legume. It is eight feet plexiglas if it weren't for this
Libya has you'd be dead. Shari here comes from very where his nannies I come along. Yes, it's just a big big, rich, a kid you know
One of the things that I I think place to a strength of yours is your very.
I can tell you're a very funny purse.
and are you have a great sense of committing timing, because you're so much about Perry Mason, you are the iconic american heavy, but you're always getting the,
is taken out of you. You're always put in humiliating situations, you're always down on. Your luck. Does
rate scene, where you ve, taken dirty
but I was ever found comedian, and then he surprises you. When you're in a phone booth need just kicks the shit out of you is so great because
you're, always back on your heels, in a way that I think allows you to be your admirable, but you're in credit.
We vulnerable and your also there there are times when you really are not that admirable, and I think it's that it it's fun.
great to see you do. All that I will allow is that was just a guess that gonna meet Rolling Jones in Rome Fitzgerald role.
And they said right of the ban on a first meeting. This look, we're gonna, Lotus bases he's going.
Incredibly fallible
he's gonna do a lot of wrong he's. Gonna do a lot of right wing!
We give him a lot of death
these guys got a hell of a hell of a journey to go on so I was I was.
From the the page, because you
is everything is evidence,
fun, to do something. That's interesting to do a major sly, rotate beautifully and couldn't just all be locked because you're, obviously you choose,
well, but in the Americans here
as you said, your playing someone who's constantly shape shifting. So to me,
the only reason I ever get into acting as if I could pretend to smoke a cigarette and if I
it were a wig and you
constantly you and carrier constantly wearing wigs there, some of them, sometimes they look like Highschool production, wigs by you still
and it's to pull it off, because its realistic that you'd have a nineteen eighties wig. You wouldn't have the mission impossible wake. No, that was now a kind of the beauty
in the fund in the kind of maddening elements of it is like,
there wasn't much among a wig budget is so
we had this incredible. You know ahead designer who had basically a box of wigs that she would this you'd
all out and then she try trying for unkind.
You said they should try and put on my head and, if it fitted as both, if she could work
but on to both our heads, it would be a keep any kind of throwing tube Heisman goddamn, wigs, notably the metallic my box. Like weeks, we shade those around. We call John Denmark as it look like John Danvers, hey. I was the whig, we more more times the Americans in any of the whig. Now we had the woman from the sea, I come in to kind of
who did the disguise of the day. She was like you kind of got
of elements, because some of them should, like all the whigs these sea I ever used were terrible wigs because you are only to be used from afar, like you would never use it. We give you getting close with a you know right, so you can't got violent than you do have a number of weeks that are far too good that we would never use. We never use the lace and all about so we do know we were. We were touching or the basis, but we did. We did have a lot of fun. The all the fun came in in the week
fittings where you were trying to give you
of as many characters in the make up room, given that one wig before you had to step on certain beheld serious again right
Explain why occasionally, because you are sharing a wig, your character, though mail was wearing a beehive hairdo, yes, and then I go to work
very happy to announce that all of our golden tickets have been released. If you were one of the lucky people who found a golden ticket good,
but to you and be sure to listen to how it all goes down on a future episode. Thank you all for playing and thanks to state farm for being a good neighbour and helping me realize my lifelong dream becoming sort of a weird, badly aging red, headed willing one euro. Weird really want that. You're, a withered Walker people thought will be original Willie Wonka was weird enough yet, and I was like nope I could be even weird, and now I've done it with my golden ticket competition anyway, very happy they're out there, but lucky
Can I take shaving pretty seriously, I got a manly beard. What what I said. I have a beard beards push out of my face all the time.
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hours off your first order? You come from, would you say it out? Dorsey people would you would you say that your parents were? I am trying to
a picture of are these? Are these people
that like to get outside and take a track through the hills, or is that something it's just in my imagination that people are doing in Wales? Is anyone doing that? Is anyone taking attract through the hills now help farmers
It's about it rains that laws are mostly in indoors. I electronics, oh now that ruins everything I'll tell you wouldn't come on. Tell me you didn't used to stripped to the waist and you and the other lads would hike up the side of the hill and go to the bar. Yes, of course you know the weed wrestler. Then you know haying time. You know we have these sizing reciting, swayed by slaves of grassland into hey Rex, and then it besides more resting
This is the kind of your book cider and then more ready here. That's the title. We're going to see you know sharing wings. You know the way to go to that. Yes, no, we did we had of childhood wise rules. We will very lucky my mother kind of
a wholesome food, some designs, ridiculous or malvolio. My mother hails from a long line of sailors on her side, so sometime in the summer time we would go in, I will go.
They play around on done
you know, I'm in my father from a big farming families. So then Nina we, I joke, but there is a lot of time were packed off to the farms to kind of Vienna. We say we helped with more of a hindrance, but he s always loved. I mean listened to by mid forties. Are they ve been roasting, didn't house at this point? Yes, they are, but we
it kind of Vietnam. We spend long summit in summer holidays on on the farms and waves now do feel at all that you have responsible, you have it
you have four year old. Is that right, I do affordable. Do you ever feel responsibly to ok, I've gotta?
him to Wales, so he experiences when I experienced you feel like you, ve got to do that. I do enjoy enormously aid. Its aim of it is like a celtic weight.
You know everything is everything is problematic for the count, I think, but I do
so I feel especially because, whilst my first language growing up and in the language itself as I
watch my parents who fought in camps,
incredibly further,
which to survive using it was it was in danger, has only just been kind of taken. A very honest go be no endangered language list, so I felt I felt
feel this incredible responsibility, especially by the language I always speak to him and whilst the poor poor thing
you're kidding. Now, let me such etc.
Ok, you are getting a gazelle and immediate, I'm sorry, you're not getting now. I'm speech him every everywhere else, which is why he thinks he's still in some kind of talk. Your novel bless him yeah. You could just tell him.
its doth rocky. His friends can think it's Elvis
It is a very real one. I've heard that language and its assenting I'll say the same thing with the yet when I hear with Gaelic I think that's not someone just took up
of continents and put them in
paper, shredder mix them up they're having a laugh at Yale, and I hope that we will
jump to the English snuck in one nine took all of ours. I haven't got it right back, I've done it again. You got the eighty passenger augured hovering over the hill got in a sack Zack over there and no, I I grew up and, as I said, a completely irish house and our grandmother lived with us and she used to just talk about
Lasher Marty. That was two hundred years ago. I've never goes away with eight hundred years ago. For us we still talk about it. I remember my passing my grandmother's room in my house very crowded house, lotta kids and I passed her room and she was watching the mood
he Cromwell
it has made in the sixties, and I want to say, was it Richard Harris yeah Richard Harris? Well, yes, and so it's Cromwell, who famously was
a friend of the IRA, and I just heard her watch what she's just watching it going.
Human. Unlike he's an act, you're playing someone who who existed hundreds of years ago, she may we may well have been talking about rigid Harris and some slight jihad that she had had a torrent affair. The air is yes, seventy years earlier, as it hadn't gone well now, and then to be fair, we would turn it to start skin huts and sheets. She say tat. Was this I'm trying to get an image? I was living in the right outside Boston, Massachusetts right and this is
I can the seventys and dumb your grandmother. You gonna this island. No, no! She was not from our allows. Did my people came over less right now?
they came over, you know they waited for this. I think for the civil war to be over so that they would cause back in the civil war they when an irish person, with short, they would basically just put them in a cannon and fire that that was the main weapon. We have we s other shooting or irish atta behind so who think they waited it out and then the minute that guided sorted out. They said, let's come here and let spend a few generations growing.
and who can be on television whenever that's invented yeah. I think an ass and along game again grandmother still,
I think she was born in eighteen ninety, so she had a long memory of Protestants.
its bullying her at school things like that which and she
would tell me, look out, look out the Protestants, you're gonna, get you when you go to school. I think what you talking about my my teacher,
you know got it wearing a dish.
He is from Africa like going to go to a very liberal public school. If we're talking about. No one cares about that shit anymore, and then I was beaten with a steady supply and unruly yeah sick. Mostly redress is unknown in here to say battled above board, but no, I
I feel the same way where my my children are growing up in what you, Mr Growth and in Brooklyn my kids are coming,
Age in LOS angeles- and I think I this is not- I feel like
betraying my genetic,
man soon. I feel like it should be raining out. We should be inside you
mother and I should be bickering instead, we're getting along sunny out people are get.
Are being adequately their emotional needs are being met. This has no bearing now on how I grew out ways your wife from why are you drinking by the way? Why is that, while it's an exact drink, we have here, looks s prick: it's called diet: Coke
you're saying I wish I had done, and I wish I had lied right now. I wish I had
said it was bourbon all DNS. Yes, I love Guinness, and so do I I love Guinness, because if you don't have time to eat a whole
Oh now hamper nickel bread gap, as someone has taken the time to grind one up in a blunder and turn it into alcohol. Yes, and then you can have it yeah and people think you ve got hair
yeah, yeah yeah, the soup of kings. You could probably get a free. You know what you could get. You could get a Guinness too
I've been your home. All you have to do. Massey was say
I sure like Guinness, and they are going to set up a Guinness tap in your house. There's one thing I could wish for Popham World peace. It would be against tap in my house. You hurt
here first Guinness, get on it, Matthew,
once again a tap in his home and it will remain there for three hours
Tell someone else in the house makes him take it down. With Islam is about three hours. They will write books on those three hours, quite a beard. You have right now with anger and faster guys. You look like an
orthodox jewish man. Look I'm going over. It's a very impressive beard. Thank you. Thank you.
I just wondered: if I could do it is not actually real this game with me from the Americans say: Julia S ring is yes, yes, because I have very correctly it's just my lockdown locks. I just you know I do
in these turbulent times. If there's one thing we d never be allowed to do is is growth
If some gonna go, I idealists fantastic. I decided to let the hare grow. I can see yet we are the ones before and I'm becoming a very attractive. I think female pop star,
from about nineteen. Seventy three may not a clue. Gimme the glue at sea
I am currently I'm about to date in a few years all day, I'll date, Scott Bail
wait around Scorpio from men, Johnny loves charge. She hath became conservative. I think now he's a trump support. Who was?
That was you saying, yea Trump right, that's exactly what I knew it s way. Who are you who are you? What book for seventy pounds? I you know I was making. I dont know Samaras enjoying as well. Are you reading it got me then I was I was in over my head. I was here
intimidated now that I was that I was writing checks.
with my mouth, that my ass couldn't cash, which is not a saying anywhere. It is you. Thank you. You Eddie First guineas
by the way get on it. Yeah will give you all the information we have get a tap installed in Matthew Racism.
And you know yes, and if Conan gets one two or that's your business, yes, I'd, Matthew, Reese. First then
yeah, I know I went. I would
much left to Sunday have against with you a united wish, I wish I was from Wales. I really do. I think it add so much. I think there are actors out there. They pretend to be from Wales because they think it adds credibility. Well, I'm one of them who are really from now on. We all time from Irene just outside England. I ended up. I looked it up on his website. Ice cube, says he's from Wales and I know store. I know I've gotta go. It emerged that pretty exciting ways, PA ways eyes. I rose and I just think it's wrong. What he's doing yeah, I don't know. I don't respect my scale reenacted. Are you guys? Are you trapped in your home, or are you able to get out at all you able to travel to some other safe place during cove? It helped me. Ok, I'll catch you. Yes, I'm very soon. I'm gonna do I'm gonna dress up as
a Guinness tap, delivering brilliant and I'm going to show up at the door and about what is not my accents here, not as good as yours, Matthews Gonna got judge can guide it kind of pace play. I just be patient
It's not your recent haven't Jesus. Maybe I'd want to feel better. I put me on the top is rather heavy could create a key tool. Could recover them back from may get it out the s? Yes, you only have one on for some reason. Let me first like the women themselves, are the lambs shut the door and whale very won't care now we're we're wasting by the time we get to New Josie Mae gets into Jersey, were in the back I'll. Have a driver, we're just drive a year and I will sit in the back drinking Jenna, singing polar songs, yeah this post, us that's on a side street.
on eight August?
I was the one guy said: Conall Oliver Combo, who read our motherland. I hope that you sent to Ireland's formulas for fathers gotta. Remember that I love my god up. Looking for us all
How do I set out? That's any Irish going now Darnay. What's the one yards matters from low or house from off I'd die, I think.
I lost my action towards you because I had a small I had a mini stroll. While no ends are saying that we die, I think, to be invited to Amerika
ass one last week anyway. Think we're gonna be really good friends. I agree
It would do me a favor I'll get you hooked up with Guinness. If you tell people I'm from Wales done, I grew up there and that I was if I was a fierce fighter. Yes,
that's why you have to flee to Massachusetts. I was such a good fighter. I had to flee. Well, you see, you know they will make up something like you killed a man in a Bay knuckle fight and and
Father the Gypsy King, O Toole or Father money, something and then you took off the Massachusetts. Ok going, I got it. I like it well allow treat this later. That word out their considerable help me a lot with my
what we call street crime. Yes, on this side of the pie, Verdun that well, you ve got plenty trust me.
you give me. We have a mutual acquaintance and Mister Tom Hanks, who you work with beautifully in a beautiful day in the neighborhood. He isn't he a lovely mag jests I mean if aerial I've never met. You know
every- was always going to find out what is really like see what the real Tommy
its persona is, and I came,
can I said
it's more than you think it is
I am in outline cited?
the sycophantic actor.
he was. He was above and beyond anything. I could have imagined. Yes,
He is he's one of those people who have sung his praises before, but I've when I was
concern, I lived in a wee lad. He he would come on the show, and so I've known him for many many many years and never seen him be anything less than angelic accepts. All I think I have as a key
Who is here all I think, he's competitive in a game begin again he's quite competitor,
and if you can lure him into may be slightly losing parlor game, a vicious prick may come out, I'm acts,
I don't think it's possible right. I don't know I've heard tell right
I have a MAC, as you know, is a terrible man stopped the room here. Yeah that'll take up only the dumping of forty years for people to believe it. Yes, you there's a saying I read this, I don't know it's true, but when you won the best actor Emmi in two thousand eighty narrowly beating me
for the role of cabbie. Yes, in a girl's Christmas, you you
I want to say something in Welsh. At the end of your
ceptin speech, but
you forgot and you didn't do
what was that you want to say or you ll tell me: oh yes, it was just a simple. You know it was a simple thank you to my parents and there were other lit. I know there,
these things I wanted to say to the to the to the people of Wales, or you know just to the kids away as everything you're kind of what I
suppose early everything, your kicked onto the stage do something.
Is it pays off? That's all I wanted to say, but then
when your bid is jumbotron, you get up you, they give you the Emmy and there's a jumbotron and as forty five seconds on it and it counts down.
so you become, you knows well, you know slightly mesmerized with accounting and they re
just one these, are flashing in these giant. Let us stop talking, stop talking and an AIDS kind of
Kipling in anywhere. What a crippled me, which is why I got off now.
that same sign. Yes, it's in my home does your. Why anyone whose Vietnam my white paper
That is also why I'd like to say something had happened to me and then I borrowed one from the army yeah. It's this giant known its term.
well, because I do wish
they would differentiate between people who can and should speak and people who we all know probably should keep it short
yeah you're someone who should be. I will say this: I started
my show, the
television show in America. The late night show in nineteen. Ninety three good god- and I have I know I am
as you can tell yes in my late, so
and yet very well preserved yeah I, but what I
I have said over and over and over again is that my favorite guess tend to,
be from somewhere around the UK or you because there is a
culture there of speaking something at an
telling stories and being entertaining
miss almost mandatory, it's in the culture and I've had it
experience where I was. I I've been in part,
to the UK and I've been around some very
funny comedians professionally trained funny people and in the funniest person will be the guy who's operating the elevator at the hotel.
he's funnier than any of us, and I think there's something
I dont know what it is, but the really is something magical about that culture and I think sometimes, american actors and tell me if you think, I'm wrong. They feel
they need to be difficult to speak to maybe it so
King James Dean, Merlin Branda started where it's kind of cool to be looking down. Monosyllabic chains
marking, and they don't understand that no one
was cooler than Richard Burton or re
Harris for Peter O, Toole or any of these people
come on a show and just blow you away with their wit and their story.
What, though those to me with a hero, see no o Toole Harris burden, though those the men I grew up, watching.
kind of taking greater fascination in India in they talk shows because I haven't it out,
how many times you yellow tool on the show, why don't I
if we ever had Peter Show he was banned
I didn't like it, yeah I'm getting. Yes, I I you know, I thought I thought
would have done better and learn of Arabia. I thought that any just another knows job, so exactly how I thought he had found it in yeah with Lawrence yeah, and I was gonna get
I'm a chance after the last emperor, and then I thought AIR Elsie's guy yet and then he passed away. No, I just never had the good fortune to have him on the show we had Richard Harris. How is a lie
He was just absolutely delightful. I never had one point.
He was telling a story and
It was so funny we all exploded and laughter, and he pushed his talk, show chair back and it almost went all the way over and I had to grab at this time.
From from going all the way over, like his feet, were up in the air. Just man.
Got. The end and
It really is something that I
Leave is in the culture where there's no sir,
thing is well, I'm an actor. I am really cool, and so I dont entertain people I become a character.
And I take it very seriously. There's this
Notion that you can be both. I agree.
a great. You can be a great actor and you can be the funniest person at the table.
His aunt referencing those men like I grew up with that. I was always aware that every element of this increase
business
is to be done. If you know I attacked with this same seamen,
fascism same level of energy like if your accepting an award fortune have to accept an award, giving a speech.
till in public that all this is that all the same elements degree so
yes, you did. I think there's is certainly a long line about in the damp
I feel that way when I'm, when I'm at a restaurant. I feel like a second,
to be for the waiter. You see,
that soon as its yes and they often say if you united trial so near the site is, do you find that? Do you find that India, you very aware that you find that very exhausting? Now, sadly, I don't. I find it very natural. I like to train I, if
completely alone in a parking lot at three-
back in the morning, if one person wandered in and we
started chatting. I would really try to give them a good time
I just thought I'd like to give a stranger, a good time and a parking refugees area we gotta stop sets out. Some of us are finishing. Yes, you know Matthew this
she's been as delightful as I was
bring. It could be an imagined it would be a girl. I really enjoyed this so much and I
like. I say you were the first and only person that I have reached out to,
my cell phone, I said please, please
talk to me many stood out to me? Please they pretend to be nicer, my friend yes for an hour and no pay yeah and you're it
What am I gladly narrow, say ass lower on one of my greatest performances, I thank you.
And ass. Yes, yes, why? Why? Why, at the end of the sixtieth minute, why why would you put the knife in that damn his eyes, Matthew, Reese? I bow to you. I am so grateful that you agreed to do this and I thank you and play
These be well, and I do look forward to a day when we meet in person, and you can see what an impressive physical space- and I am not yet said. Yes, I got no idea, you were so tall.
We were on zoom right now, so I can t I can tell by despite by merely by perspective of the hind tiny DAS tiny share that you dwarf so easily. You didn't, I had the maid extra Small, oh and yes, and I'm wearing pee Wee Herman suits. That's what it is anything to make me see beer larger. Thank you very much, sir. This was angle joy. It really was in a great honor, so thank you for the invitation or are you can now find and followed by needs a friend on audible, along with hundreds of thousands of other pod guests
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hundred. Obviously I worry a lot about security and an international figure figure known throughout
world also not beloved,
right of enemies,
I have enemies all over the place on this bog can on this fight guests in my office, mostly good.
Sonny, you probably know of many people live said, hey
Where exactly is gonna lives like a dispatch and injuries to go beaten with pipes ray, and I give them your address by now,
ninjas beating you it's such a waste of a ninja iron, injured, a beat you with a pipe when they have a veto.
Skills, but I do. I think security is not just important for a fellow like me known throughout the world, but for anybody
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Bt dot com, slash past decades time to meet the second of our golden ticket winners, feeling self conscious that we're not giving away cash for a four by four June. I mean
we're getting away nothing for by four like it puts a lot of traffic on the conversation. Yes, that's when I whereby for China,
what I want my four room. You thought we were gonna give them. We would give people a truck sure you get afore by four
Would you will earn yet to come here and go this beautiful boy. You know whatever you do it?
what a waste and will our nets time. It's the best use of his time now are right.
we're gonna, be ok! Well, the way this contest worked as you could find a secret message on the podcast on the television show or on social media and register to meet you Conan,
along with sooner and myself, and today's guest is banned from Denver, Colorado cool. Let's bring a man, hey
and ban a how's it going it's fantastic cronan,
Are you guys doing we're? Ok, it sounds like you're kind of a little bit crying. Are you ok bent yeah? I brought my boys were. May here, I'm I'm doing great, I'm just. I just can't believe this is real. This is really happening just showed to clarify for people who are listening to the pod cast when he said I got my boys here. He did not take out his testicles mine dogs. These are my children's. Sometimes, what are your dogs is too cute little scruffy dogs. What are their names, so this is teddy, but I was thinking of renaming him actually catechized airing eyes, Marian the no camp is God made as dog made has dog, and then this is this. Guy. Is Oliver danger? Oh my hurry cool. There are very few doggie and I was thinking to rename in him, but Gooch very nice. You know it is an act of cruelty to rename the dog well into its life cycle.
going on in your life first, while you're you're in Denver is our right of just outside Denver and Aurora, but
born and raised in a tiny little to stoplight town called Clay and which is up in a thousand islands on the canadian border of New York, a very
Well, we're known for our thousand islands dressing a and the two lies in the centre of town. Yes exact. You know what I love thousand now undressing on pretty much anything. I've really happened on corn beef. I like it on anything but a salad. I just I love it on a sandwich. You come from this small town there and then you made your way to the big city Denver I data or not
you can see my sure it says: o Brien staff on yeah, o Brien, was the first bar. I ever worked in my home town. I feel like I've just destined to meet you Conan. I really do yeah, it's a very uncommon. Let let me ok. I worked in an irish pub in downtown Denver for the past four years
Met my wife who has or Brian's and her family how my
and my favorite author growing up was TIM, O Brien, who the things they carry. So
There's a connection here is allowed this going on this a lotta irishness neuron and my apologies for that. It's a dark strain, but now guys could be related to is the last guest we figured out was related to Conan bring my way or that, where related only are we're all related sort of you would fit in very easily in my household, although you seem a little more sane than my real brothers, then I understand: big changes are coming in your life. What's happening, big change!
it's gonna have I got a story for you when people
day that they usually disappoint whenever land just telling you in my life when people go Conan of I gotta story, few they go so I had a problem with my.
muffler and I went to my Nicky. That's all right! So
by the anti way. I'm sure that's a big story. You go ahead. I write so the wife and I you know we we wanted to start a family fur for some time and we were having the best of luck. My wife is also a bar tender and bar manager, things where we were really go on that well in that department
So one day
this this old Irishman walks into her bar and he gave her a chaotic irish necklace to where the very next day she called me a crying, I thought
something was wrong, but she told me that she thought she was pregnant and beautiful story, so it gets a little bit better cuz. After about thirty pregnancy, test later at home, we went to the doctor and we found out that our baby is due on March. 17Th Saint Patrick's day
Oh my god, I saw you and unfortunately, this old man that gave her the inaccuracy he recently passed
kinda has a weird lion. King circle, life five too.
So I was wondering you know: do you believe in the lock of the Irish at all? I do.
actually I do believe in mystical magical things happening. I know people think that dynamic
cynical hard edged guy, but I do that
lovely story. I wanted to say that I was the old man I mean if I dont moisturize for two days. I look like a very old irish man and then I was the one that came in and gave that charm. But now this man is
asked on. I dont want to steal his glory
I think there is some magic to it. I really do at eight is magic out. There need Emma I'm a sentimental old softy give any
ideas for
the name of this. You say it was a genomics at the sex of the baby. It's a little baby girl actually just went and got a three the ultrasound yesterday. I don't know if you can see this, but that is a perfectly formed for that
faces more formed than my face and as a more that's a beautifully of what a beautiful baby girl here, you didn't finishing compete. I never. I came out at two months, not just like I'm gonna job right away. I were I to local court for the first three years of my life. She is gorgeous. What are you? What are you thinking of naming this girl? Give? Any ideas is a good story. Right is so the story continues. My wife. A couple years ago before we were married, you said I I have a name for a baby. I had a dream that we had a baby girl and we named or Florence
I looked at are really weird and- and she said why- and I said, do you realize that
my grandmother's name and she had no idea I got,
Ben. Are you living in a wrong? I know this is any love this year
you'd be played by Ryan Reynolds in two years line that I went
That is a gorgeous man and I can say, as a single shot me I made out with him on the show I did I they met and I that guy can kiss yeah yeah. I do him in a minute happening who I'm sorry. I was for a comedy bit bay. You ok! Well, I keep thinking about it. So I thought about says this is a very nice story. I'm I'm very happy that that your life has taken this this wonderful turn of year. You were very excited besides. You know this. This goal in the golden
ticket. You know this baby has been the but best thing that come out of this second investing when you think about it. The baby is this. Florence is the second best thing all to getting to talk to us, which is the first by society just so that our priorities restrain love. That's no! It's a really lovely story, and I really am now we're getting them a baby. Present
we're. Disasters not does not foresee any gifts, but I'm gonna send you some kind of baby pressed
and yet I see your ball whisky. Yet we
not sending you any peanut butter, flavoured whisky just because just because
sometimes by an add on our who think on our behalf can get em something a sponsor sent. No no you're gonna get a gift from me. The certain rules. Really, this is really so. We are all making now you're, not getting erected dysfunction, dream that doesn't seem to be an issue either.
we are, will take care of the solar. I'm really happy,
you been there you'll like it. You seem like a nice guy and it's nice to know that you're out there and which your wife's name her name's Leah. Lately you only are out there and that nice things are happening for you. Thank you, and I know that if it had been a boy, the child would have been
old Conan didn't work out. That way. I know I know- maybe maybe on the next year on now or if Florence, if you grow tire that name Cornelia since you're, into switching names well into someone's life I'll table it for discussion with the MRS Ban. This is
very cool talking to you my best to you and and and tell tell your wife that I'm think
of her and we're really happy for, and yet when a cinema was sent him along, it is a gift basket. I do for my friend Leah he had and we're going to send one of those two Ben and then I'm gonna charge disown waste. You won't even know.
So I just put it on your Carrasco card you'll, be he knows more about it
Can we do? I listened
you guys when I walk in my dogs so every day right after work, I walked down the street and people think I'm.
crazy, because I'm laugh into myself ism picking up dog shit
let most common complaint we getting about the five guys. Just people say they were at the Jemison
in that they were laughing and people thought that they were having a nervous breakdown. So
we'll ban it was really nice meeting. You congratulations and build up your sleep now. Thank you in and so on are eagerly. I love you guys through on the park ass to you guys are ability sandwich.
very nice. I would I be the big in no. You cannot you're the soggy toast because their tomato got it all. Soggy was so nice talking to you good luck, always noting C s egg, your shirt off go. This is for you check out these guns right, there's no,
There's no guys in here gives any chance that I was at all irish man, there's always a chance here, and I urge man and whenever you meet an old irish man in a bar, remember, it's probably me making your
which come true, then faking my death better. Turning to my point,
cast anyway, he was a lovely guy. He why
happy. I am that is doing for his manly, a young, our heartfelt congratulations and, of course, our thanks to state farm for making this whole golden take it
like this, I like talking, defends and yeah enjoy it. It's very mean.
And so thanks a state
when you want the real deal like a good neighbour. State farm is they're, gonna know Ryan needs. A friend was soon amongst session and Conan o Brien, as I'm self produced by me, MAC, loyally, executive produced by Adam Sacks, Joanna Solitary off and Jeff Ross at teen, cocoa and Colony Anderson and Chris Ban and add your wolf theme song by the White Stripes incidental music. By Jimmy the Zenith. Our supervising producer is blamed and our associate talent producer is Jennifer samples. The shows engineered by will back to you, can rate and review the show apple podcast, and you might find your review featured on a future episode. Gotta question for Conan called a team cocoa hotline at three two three four five one, two eight to one and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode and if you have an already, please subscribed. Conan o Brien needs a friend on apple pie, jests stingier or wherever fine pod casts are down
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Transcript generated on 2020-12-28.