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my name is Kristen Shawl and I feel relieved about being calling o Brien spread their welcome to Colonel Brian needs a friend. We ve got a lot to talk about here today, first of all, Sonia is nothing and be joining us on, the Pied cast and she's pretty good excuse. She did give birth to her twins. She has twin boys. I think it's Mikey and Charlie. Confirm

This, for me, is that right, sorely item is air. It online Michael yeah, it's Charles and Michael, but she calls are making and Charlie so she's, embracing her Armenian passed on she now has these these two children and it's so funny because I became like us a grandfather figure or something I don't know what happened, but I was on the EAST Coast had to be on the east coast when the baby's came, and I was so nervous and I kept checking my phone and pacing and my wife kept saying it's gonna be fine I did say my client heard. Yes, I haven't heard, and I was acting her husband. Like any word what's happening and then they came to think I wanna see pictures Pictures and then I wanted more pictures- and I totally turned into this

I don't know like it was my shoulder and at all upset with you that you may be didn't even act that way for your own. Yes, I said it's making Charlie she's had quit, which they move our children. I might well that's that's neither here nor there that's neither here nor year, and there is only one year of an end, this affair. That would be everywhere. That's all we need to know but I I totally lost my mind so happy showing strangers. Look soda had our babies, in which crazy is a lot of people, listen to the pond cast, so people knew so. I had people saying to me so so now must be having those children who know what data could last night look and I was showing them my phone and walking around just eat bellowing. It people in restaurants- I don't often Bello, but I was bellowing. I was very excited well you're, a proud uncle God, other girl. What would role as yeah, I think, evil, evil overlord citizen it

rain clouds? Brother brain? I don't know what my relationship is. But I think of myself his uncle Toby Uncle Conan that you sent me a picture that morning of the twins, before sound ahead, even texted yeah had them. I tell excited, was and by the way, let me make sure I ice introduce David hopping. David huh thing is the assistant whose filling in four so normal she's gone, which me is by law. You also have to be on the pie last year by law, so you David were we're, getting excited the text for me and photos before you even her. From sooner I realized I to luncheon use set. I had message you about something work related and your response. but have you seen a picture yet and then sent one with a year? The proof that I do have a human side. He does thank you and I, to. Let people know that what you think people need to know that now a strange guy strange- listen, I know, for that you have designs on Sundays,

There are going to try and take advantage of it fact that she's creating human life to slide in here and become a household name, and I've got my eye. You have me, it's been a five, the planned here. Is this You haven't telling sooner for years, have children in fact them twins. There was a weird things: between the railway on. Why that she has to show we out longer and you said triplets for while I said five but She said now well, David, have you gone over to see the baby's I think we're over there? I would imagine first of all she lives very far away in a part of everyday I'm not familiar. We are what no, no I'm not gonna it. Just a part of delay that lets you say is in part of my normal route. One needs, I think helicopter and then- a donkey and dogs led to get there. But my point here, that I live in a bubble the media who should know

we're by the surroundings, but no, I think they're just having family now God. Sooner has a big family because it was quite dramatic for lot of people. I know that lies and I went through it twice when when our children were born Sonia has all kinds of family their area, I dont, think she's held the baby's yet anytime. I take MR. I get a response within seconds yeah I'll talk to you going. I just woke up from an eleven our nap and eleven hour. Now someone's rubbing my feet and I'm thinking you ve got twins. I thought you two were just going to: u intact we're just gonna be laid out completely, but no. She says oh, my mother's with them, this ants with them that uncles with them this person just came over. We got an Amazon bags hitherto sonar delivered. It now has two jobs: she's taking extra work, oh, but she's too, tired to do the pod cast, but no she's

doing color commentating for the Olympics. She just bought a bait and tackle shop and she's working there she's what you say, she's getting a lot of help from what she calls the yards lightning. That is, he said Secor Armenian Turner, Maria the grandmothers we we didn't have that we didn't have that we didn't. I lived far away from my parents and also you know my parents said my mom had six kids did they fly out when you had your gets? Yes, they became from Boston to New York to see the kids, but again, as I was going to say before you really interrupted me so you'll have to learn, learn etiquette yeah. When I raise my hand, this motion that means are allowed to speak, got it and that's another rule that stone has never followed but anyway they came down on my mom. Had six kids, so oh they're lovely, that's on you. You know you guys handle that. I had six kids in four years, so

That's how the Irish do it. I was born for months after my brother, like yeah, true story. and then Kate was born. Two months after me were used. asked gestation, reuse, Sharon Womb time there. It was. It was like air The envy you know it was just people were like you fast, though, in the year when I was in in utero, there was an app I remembered I had. This is my womb time, but now I got to get out as cuz Kate's coming through so yeah it was complicated was a different time. The Irish were, efficient that way, but Now we can do that and lies as parents from Seattle, so they could come in and help somewhat, but they couldn't stay there, both very busy with what they were doing, which is meant. They live their toffee makers. They haven't. Toffee factory Dispread misinformation. Yes, I don't like to leave that where I met as they ought to be true, I love toffee so yeah, sir pairing. since Seattle have a famous old toffee store. They

mixed Toffee all day, it's up at the top of the space needle. Yes, it is doubtless base needle they they little toffee place. Their main would check it out. If you love your toffee fantastic, but they have to say the toffee constantly and they couldn't get away to take care of it. the grandchildren if you let the toffee sit for even a moment, and you can't get someone else has iconic they hire. Someone could not stir right. Licence parents of really get it at stirring that toffee just write with their little wooden spoon, but anyway again wasted time all around. just wasted babble. We were soon all the best make and Charlie we say. Mikey Mikey She has a mighty because I always hear her saying shut out. My gay I don't hear Saint shot MIKE. I have shot like a shot up. My is the bad one year and then Charlie's well he's also bad for both bad yeah he's already stolen stuff, our true they found all kinds of stolen stuff in his crib by

we wish you all the best we lover and shall be. back soon. Sorts very David. Her little scheme isn't gonna considered twins now. Do you want kids in your future, probably sends a very strong commitment. I'm happy it take you to lunch and talk to you about it. Any time. If you want to you life advice from me, you probably really look up to me as a role model. Jesus. My guest today very excited Yesterday, no one gives me less than you. David, David you glad that I'm alive didn't you glad that I wasn't murdered last night brutally, with with a hacksaw yeah sure, make yesterday is a hilarious commuting, an actress who voiced Louise Beltran Bob's burgers and now you can see her in the Disney plus Series, the mysterious Ben.

EC and she's done so much amazing work this introducing even scratch the surface various Why she's with us today, I do love her christian shawl. Welcome every time I realize we're friends like surprise, twicet, surprise you because, because it reminds the that I've made it. I this as a sign of making it now in the business. As soon as my friend that's a little bad, I mean a little bet that hurt my feelings. I mean I'm sure you have friends that do other things. No I'll only be friends with people in show business days of David a happy he's filling in fact, but he's my assistant, whose filling in for Cinema Cecial say hi David I, but we are not friends. I mean you're an employee, David Kara. That's that's fair! I sign something in you sign. Something is that we can never be friends, that's true that keep it easy. We

We have much to speak about yet because we ve been. I think we benefit for a long time. Yeah I mean when it was the first time you came on my show. It must be a big day in your life relation like that up We have that in your notes and when was it guys? Don't know, I don't think you is in New York. I filled it into your show. Tell you move TAT Lake. If you went from Europe tonight show which by them, I bought a t shirt. Did you buy tonight? Your teacher, as soon as I knew she was going down, I went online and bought a t. Shadows were worn it. Those are worth of a fortune. I think they're, pretty. Those are like owning a Dewey defeats Truman newspaper that it's a big dear yeah, it's like having a postage stamp of the biplane, its flying upside down, that's worth eight billion dollars. I see people right are occasionally with tone in tonight. Show merchandise, and I say you hang onto that because that is

historical oddity. That's worth of fortune yeah it's gonna be definitely gonna, be a memory data. Bring that up right off the bat we were. You know it now. I'm surprised, we're friends. Why were we were suddenly and show you tonight always relieve their great so great you're talking to an airship pilot, and you brought the hindenburg within seconds. Yes, because I don't think I did your shell in New York because it is less shifting to dad and then I was it amounted to pay. You did a very sweet thing, which is. I was on tour in two thousand and nine, no two thousand ten. I was on that big tour between shows, and I think you came stage and you had like crochet. That's not me when I don't know the name of the woman, they were led. The fan that nine

Is that what you gave it to me? I could get my God value rarity. You scared the hell out of me. I thought you just meant. I thought you just me. That was what you get into the realm of million lap gets now that you're about to. I was about to get caught like confusing my found when Miranda July it was you, you came back in age and that's what you gave me something that a fan had me but it was you and I thought that was really sweet, and here I find the conqueror and I really have always fought we're hilarious. You know you you're, always good. Your money in the bank is what we say in our business. Money in the bank. Faith can actually three it's true. How much money It's not. Ok, ok vanished in their sort of in better acquainted coin yeah. Oh I'd still understand that glance. Not real, though right, not real,

that's why you should be too excited by being money in the bank yeah, I'm trying to say about trying to degrade my compliments as much as possible. No makes me more comfortable. I've been watching you be hilarious for years about such myself. Where did this stuff? because I know you come from a different background, Then everybody else that I talk to our most of the people. I talk to you, which is you pretty much grew up on a farm. Did you yeah Elizabeth Eliza out in the middle of nowhere in its it wasn't like my dad's hobby finally, is actually a construction worker for money, but we would can a bunch of have her callous and get rent a ball once a year, and I would just sit and watch the bull just own all female cows, and it was the most terrifying thing you ve ever seen. If you ve ever seen that because the ant while penises are late, little snakes come out late like have you seen it well

yeah it's it's idiots land yeah. I mean I'm not a brag, but my penis, it's just What was I tell servants? Tell you come out of the house adopts it tell us that no girl but incredible length, the new you and, Can I use it? Is measuring, take some during construction binding. Yet nobody so wait a minute. So you, though, that you make we took up their voice. You grew up. Does it was interesting to me, as I love that you grew up in this environment that almost feels like nineteenth century to me? You're on a farm watch, Animals have incredible sex just credible set by the ball and again as with much of the animal kingdom, I don't think that those steer I'm game. The names run either heifers. I dont think the female cows were enjoying it at all and that they were trying to kid where he found a way to save their bodies.

that said, the media, a sack as I am able to give us a joy. I thought I would have wanted to think that animals really enjoyed sex I'd like to think that somebody's enjoying. So I think the male animals are getting it get having a great time right. But if you ever watch. Those nature shows I mean, have you what the hell for play a nature now so I play in ITALY. They call them what the Females Guinea like held down and just pop and she's just like staring had like make it and make it an right, I'm a guy. the Deuce thy business my dna and then in Dover Giver Watch bulls high five, each other afterwards, We only had one while also men, so the nail it get pregnant and enable we'd have calves and then would raise the calves and then we would sell them back to the butcher, though the butcher wait till you did our relationship. I named them. You named them off of Africa I knew it, I knew it where they were going so you,

grew up. Probably unable to really attached to a living thing. You probably have no idea how to form a real relationship with any human because of this upbringing may be made now. I know I know women's day, everybody. I learn, everything dies, it's all temporary! Ok! I wasn't at the word. I'm catholic we are, we I don't have it we gotta haven't. We hang on labour. We area we hang out with Abraham Lincoln on a cloud you still catholic. I am catholic in the way that anybody who is irradiated with Catholicism is a child yeah and four into their teenage years is catholic. Now. What does that mean? I think I embody a lot of the catholic values are quick to get angry. I use alcohol to feel better about things at night. Yet is all kinds of stuff that I think would probably make me catholic, but you are growing. What I really didn't like is growing up with the concept of how that really bothered me,

I didn't want my kids to think there's a hell because I dont see of do Lutherans, think there's a home yeah. In the end, if you're, not, if you don't believe in Jesus, that's where you had it and I would add to me tat. I was a teenager, belay wow, you they're interested in a lot of people. Like me, we revised of the world with seemed wrong view, teacher kids lake. My husband was raised without religion. Until so, are we call back godless yeah, like you married a numeric, Gaga godless man. I got this man a man without a rudder, a man going going to Hell but there's things about the two thousand lieutenant just culturally and also just being mindful with like some prayer before dinner on China? Do prayer before dinner and just them things that I think good about religion and leave out. The back. Like picking and choosing for her right, Zack gonna work. Now, whether you can you can teach kids.

is to have a moral compass without necessarily quoting from scripture So that's that's a possibility. I mean I when I grew up every single everywhere I went there was those realistic depictions of Christ on the cross. That, and I mean those are rough yeah and some of them are very realistic. It really does look like a guy who got stabbed a couplets. And when the Romans Spear and in his hands were nailed to the cross- and I thought that was very intense yeah changed. a whole manner. Look at you, ve brought up in such a short time: oh yeah model, so many intent, subjects and and I think it's a good at it. We need to go with it and that we need to go with it. ok. I was traumatized by those catholic images, sometimes growing up yeah. It's definitely painted a pig.

Awake and it was your fought like he died because of you, your own eyes of us, I would look at and go. I never asked you for anything. I didn't ask you I wasn't even around. I was always yelling at the cross that was hanging on. Why would I never asked you for a day when you look at me, for I saw a care about it. You know I like turning to a whole different character, so you upon this farm and You see life unfolding all around you and a very sounds very brutal way. But when did you say? Ok, I think I'm funny, I'm I'm a funny person, one that really did your parents know you're funny. Now I mean they would argue that they did, but I don't have any memories of my parents like the laughing at me growing, like oh, my God, Kristen, in two thousand. We really have any memories of me like performing jokes, for my parents either, but I think these photos buddy.

Those memories earners derivatives. I think in high school I was. I joined the forensics team, which speech in debate. I know you know it when I was in high school. I join the four in sixteen, because I thought we would be investigating deaf and dumb I swear to God that would be dissecting the bodies of people that have been murdered in trying to figure out what happened, and then I found out that now you get note cards and you debate these incredibly dry topics. I was enraged yeah. I showed up the first, namely human foot I swing in order to solve this said now now, five years later, G, dad. You have a very low it I'll be greatest investigate employee Is there anyone listening, renounce offended? You know you know the deal when you tuned in love tuned in completely wrong. I guess I'm from another era.

The whole idea of police investigation is a big deal. What happened here on the coroner's like there and he's like? Well, you know we're pretty sure he was alive and equipment to cross, but in these the less a roman spear and there they are questioning. people yet When you do sorry, it tell me to shut up, no. I like you, asking questions as I agree that we want to know about my work out routine, not really when you tell ye. That's? U pouring water by the way that last night, no one zero nobody's trolling when you'd You quit air shell and now Well, I didn't think you quit your, shall I think you are just going to start a nuisance. yeah. Well, I would have been acting like you were dead. I did not. I do not write it like that, but then I was well and people die. They don't get to see that did you enjoy on Irish, for I was surprised. While I was surprised that where I was

can do the night tonight in other land show anymore so, but I was gonna, go and do other stuff and that this is it true story, but we. Finish, the last show on a Thursday the next day, my family and I flatter the east coast, so we can sort of just the start walking my daughter and college campuses cause she's. Seventeen she'd never been on a college campuses have covered. We thought we should at least start looking at a bunch of schools just to see. Does anything ring about anything for higher Verna? Oh God, now, let's off the table. oh yeah sure you could pay, no, no! I let go, after what I did at Harvard my people no longer theirs. They occur

who's out standing, but we literally went the next day to the EAST coast and I walked into a restaurant like in Connecticut. This is twenty four hours after the last show airs and what an older woman walked up to me. As I walk, into the restaurant and said what are you doing here? I thought you were tired from television I've been thinking about that which is which is first of all. You know, I'm sorry, I didn't retire from television, I'm just not going to do the night tonight, late night shown more, but the second thing that was hilarious was

either that even if that were true, I am allowed to go to a red ass. She was so disappointed Levant. I bet you did that the eight, but I saw your firewall show and it really brought a tiered my eye- and here you are stuffing your face- was crowded out you fat fuck might happen. I ve been a dog, I my whole life always had dogs, but have also always head cats. In fact, my first pet was a cat pebbles. Did you know that then it yeah pebbles was my cat. Had that cat when I saw it was four years old. I wanted a cat, so I've always been a cat person as well as a dog. person, but I love cats. I have Do cats now the liver, their family being a cat person. you're looking for a way to make the situation easier and guess what they He's just got a lot easier because tidy,

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utter. Takes care of. That is a great job, but I see what what a drag it is sometimes he's in a bad mood because of it that puts in a bad mood and then I come to work and I treat you badly Dave exactly yeah who wants that? Nobody? Yes, that's what you want. The title that's breeze, litter system, the breezes works very well: takes care value, letterbox issues, makes it simple: tidy cats breed twitter systems available nationwide, Petko, Petsmart, pet supplies, plus Amazon, chewy and Walmart dot com where more and get a seven dollar Cooper. It tidy cats breeze dad come tat. He gets breeze dot com About anyone else, I will make it very clear that over the past fourteen fifteen months of this quarantine, I'll have ton his plan, my next vacation, whom the vacation that I can take once were free. To travel about her

You been daydreaming about that mean you have entirely dealing with quarantine, but also you ve got your ear. Selecting kids? Yes, so I know about you, but there's this whenever You can find. All you can do is think about when this is over, I wanna take an amazing true. Yes, that's all, I think about all day every day, NEA well, I've been thinking and mine, specifically, is Tuscany with low. To go to Tuscany to ITALY. That's one of my favorite places to go and there's a town that my wife, if an eye and our kids love to go to like to visit and a region, I just think I would like to go there. Yet. I would like to be able to drive around wander into restaurants and wonder the countryside. That is what I'm jouncing for Well American, except asked can turn those try, our dreams and reality. Every time you make a grocery store run that is correct. Just build up membership rewards point on select cards to day and redeem for that vague

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died com. Slash with annex terms, apply David. You know how long for the loom has been a part of people's lives. I doubt how many years take a gas while guess seventy now, a hundred and seventy wow. That's how long fruit of the loom has been around that's incredible. It's gotta heritage, that's filled with first, they were the world's first packaged underwear. Did you know that agenda? They were the first brandy air, an underwear commercial. Ever that's cool yeah was like a nineteen eleven and the first step. An unconditional guarantee on their products. They were the first. Trailblazers, then these other under whereas come along bellew. You me too, I don't think so bad. line its fruit of alone. That did it first further. Limb creates booty apparel at an affordable price

intended for everybody and every body, so they did their humanity, drives everything they do, for the loom is inviting and warm kind of like your favorite. Well warn t: will you further the loom? You feel yourself reflected in their products in the stories they tell it's amazing and they're. Just think pursuit Quality relentlessly, better fit better quality, better performance, with a hundred and seventy years of spark and soul. Further. The loom will for John DOE continued go above and beyond, and every standard and putting passion, Erin optimism into every step sown in every innovation, launched, frivolous, has never settled and leave no plans to start. But now I will, I know I'll, do something else, but I wanted to be something that really shows my athleticism

There are people see the central sight of me. Tat was hidden. I wouldn't wasn't copycats. I was wondering I guess I was even was the about it cause. I know you're what I heard you're gonna do like one show a month, there's something like a variety show, but it would be very special funny because now just outlined election, we're talking so much about me by what's so funny as that, wherever they put out in the press room.

A scanner morganti. Do a variety, chauffeur, HBO man and I never said European Maxie joe- did her low. Allow me I've got a format it's as do. I won't try on you know. What's so funny because it said variety show, and I had all these people saying cones going to bring back. The variety show like I'm Dean, Martin and women are going to come out at the beginning and go it's cone. It and it's gonna be sketches Rehman, a restaurant and yeah. You know today's guess: Kristen Show and then you're like crazy about it. I see my died, buried the tap tap and about how cool guy yeah yeah. I get a lot of this one over here. She's real, not a job! Well, I've gotta get back to the sketch invented it. Then. Why can't do this to me? Well, the thing is it was so funny is that I found it later on that someone. I think it Turner just

put variety showing their because that's the category wherein any enemies, and so they just put in you know it's gonna, be a variety show and I swear to God. I had people on the street saying I know We can get some dancers and other people saying I know you can get some singers that can go Conan, Conan Conan, it's the cotton show and I thought that's hilarious. So many people have different ideas about this. What this would be, but they like stay this yet live on with you involved to be seen. inessential away. I why fight me wanting to be a superhero quantity has not the king. So I want to ask you a question which is you have? I think one of the most recognisable voices of anybody on the planet not just goes about birds, because all the work you and when I hear your voice do other people that don't know who you are and then you start to speak and suddenly I should do a much better table at the restaurant. Ah, I haven't I

I've been to a restaurant in a very long time by, but I have, I have brought a joy to people on strangers when they hear me talk in a way that its very rewarding and makes me feel good and then too near yeah. They love Bob's, burgers. They really out of deliberately lab below Bob Bob spurious and they'll. But think about Mabel and gravity files, which was on petitions see them, but that did you watch it. Davy seem I dunno watch that one, I'm sorry germinal ally that had been years, this premature again he's feeling in four. So this is really awkward legacy away at all. I do you know that the conference is one of my favorite is ten years old. You only learned is that David's here he's sitting in because zone I couldn't be here because she had twins and

David filling it is my assistant in any thought- will just have David sitting here, and I love that you turned to him on the one thing he wouldn't know about mean asked. about the free, Brittany Movement of just last about reduce new land and he's all over it? Oh yeah. Did you go and lung capacity I went last weekend and there is great they really wasn't crowded as mass dinner, a day, but I just read that they're bringing masks back skimpy entire dead get tested after I do not have quoted from. Doesn't need David. Did you were you all now, even using? Where did you not break into Disneyland when it was closed during cove? I know you think I did, but I swear I didn't. You live on a little island for a while. Now that was someone else, I'm pretty sure I got lifetime ban, I can't risk that. Ok now that they did, I think so. Well, I'm excited, I guess you just can't live on it. Does me. I ll end for free, nothing's, free it does

yeah yeah. I like my voice. I didn't like it growing up because it didn't change when I changed into a woman that started stay the same, and that was a little bit of a bummer people would pointed out alive nl. I like yeah, sorry and I had to speak she Jerry College, who was so disgusted with how I founded that she said I will never make it is it true that you know it's stunning to me is that you can have each teacher, who is saying what you can't make it in the business, because your voices to distinctly, which is the thing that everybody wants yeah. I know I guess it's guys, time you know in in the early two thousand there were late. Ninety, they were t genome yo. You did Shakespeare monologues than you did death of a salesman and you had Dick shit, you know and you where you were a theatre actor, and I was just

lisping. My name you, like name and as a Christmas or what I weren't you like the live. She said you weren't per barrel, I'm here to register as I like to register we're glad name. Christians are all my gun, then she was like. I'm sorry, I cannot help you and I was standing a guy who is late. I had occasion I never want to laugh twenty two years in your face it yet, but the added- but you know that's the thing when you go to school. Sometimes some teachers think that this is how She taught cigani. We were so she thy everywhere. If everyone spoke like suborning Lieber. and they had a shot road. I didn't understand that it is what makes us unusual that I think that's where we're going

you know, that's always been my theory yeah. Some of it is just a few around for a while and an anyway I'm down, where am I not done, sounds, doesn't sound sexy, but by use stick around for a while and after while people say I guess a guy who's sounds like that and looks like that without weird name and that word hair candy, late night hast yeah. No, I did not as doing and that's the way should be me, where's late night guy in these days anyways I got you frequent asking restaurants. Amy obviously take her podcast for this. Why don't you just can't? We just say you know Kristen shall needs a friend and your guest confronts us. I've always wanted to deal interviews that people would you're good. Your naturally curious near asking questions and that's yeah late night going. I have no idea, I'm the guy that did just left. You go back.

The only option does eyes they get about you to lake yeah. You just quit, because the show doesn't really get cancelled. Were you just have to leave What's this very funny thing, I realized at one point that for the first couple here's my show back in the early nineties. I was always in danger of losing it. Then Euro Ward, if you can last, is that the reward is there will never end, but You think that never ends frightens the shit out of me like going ETA Catholicism. I Stan none once what's heaven and she said. What's your favorite thing to do, and I said color in a colouring book and she said well, is that for all Kennedy had never ends, and I was horrified horrified and so the concept of you know what you can't do this for ever you cannot? He sounds like TAT got locked in, for you are now no matter what you weren't you're gonna, be coloring in Heaven for eternity. Yes, but how with great historical figures,

Would they rarely with Lincoln, who still gonna be. Like I dont understand, I was at the theater I had my back turned and he's tear hosting and alive. I like that that could even be. I could see that being a booby movie yeah, it is not a home with your terrible judge of. What's all movie, that's not movie. Will you talking about now? I'm angry you can kick him off your partners. Can now it's your part, gas merit. I turn on you. You re an asian millionaires. This one, you, member at every minute, scattered appeal, three minutes catch given moment where you we wouldn't have been. I thought I was told that we lose our bodies and we're all those balls of white floating who told you that

my Sunday school teacher. I, whenever got balls of light zoning around, that your spirit highlight the movie. No, that's! When you go into that's tron thinking, oh yeah tell us all No, I don't. I don't think that I dont have. We have our body we have our bodies and I we sit on lose this free trade area. That way, the Lahti that you die. What you get like your younger bottles has another positive easier. If you're going to have in which an Elvis's there come on, oblige I'll, be there which obviously going to sea going to see nineteen fifty, five lean and mean Elvis need to see. Seventy two bell: Bottom Elvis, you gonna see heavy Elvis towards the end. Seventy six so as not to economic gonna, bring this tiller horrible place. What about kids that dialogue? They never get to be a dolphin. Haven't they get to keep growing in Heaven or do? Are they always gonna, be whatever sorry? Ok,

what was your question? We re so near that places you ve taken us dead children. It's been a tough tonight show which I think occupy similar categories for me and then and then tape measure penis, my career being over and yeah penises expand like telescope silver, scary, scary thing. I said this whole time: let's true, it's true bits flow telescope. Peanut such fine. You are going to ask me a better question and I caught you up with the ball. The blame for biogas where's the moment when it really sword too quick for you, when you really wait a minute. I sit in this business as a funny person. I know how to do this. One is that happens. Is that happen when you're doing improv? Is it happened when you doing theatre stuff might strike you College College with Greek Zealand ownership, is I'm wearing the meat,

my me I'll, show that he from college because and wanted to where something will stick in my armpit anyways. Yes, colleges, great southern, an improved sketch calmly to call me I'll show which had, as per the wealth, Stephen Cold an audition fire and dig it in that's how funny it was large and I think of him more than newsman Stevie goal there. He never really got into com, and I say that with great affection, do you to hang out? We have on the past yeah. He told a story on another podcast. I think it was smart less. He told us worry about me skiing. We ended up, into each other and and skiing. We are really good time and with his family, his lovely, but he later told this story about me having to use the bathroom when we are

a ski lift together and not number one but number two, and that I opened it trap door in my pants and decade on children who were scheme, which I thought was absolutely hilariously. When I heard it yeah, he told it with a straight face me. I had someone on the street come up to me and go is true. Man, and I said what true when they went, scheme- was even call bare and had seen shared, so you just chin all over these kids and tried to hit them with your shit below. When I went yeah yeah. That's, u have to yes end and those moments, and I do not refer used to be that the more her demand, the lady in there in the marks, brothers movies. You say I never I can't be. They are saying that is not true. That never happened. That's ridiculous! So I to go the other way, which is, of course it's true. that's what I like to do.

oh shit, on children when I'm on a scale that so he should have been in your improv group, because he could have done that quality work he's smart That's when I that's when I was like comedy forever, an impromptu when you start to he classes. It's like I'm like a bug yet to politically better at it right and then could stand up, was also really really fun in need I did everything I could do. That was comedy related. What did you like better the improv or the stand up at the end? data, stand that because the improv you know it's fun, but are the little nerve racking yes, and I used to get very in improv if universe chance is a big part of it. And people love to see the high wire act aspect of it, but I always wanted to. I wanted this. Certainty that every single time it was going to be great and once you want that, you can't really be a true improvise or I dont think

yeah. You had the bomb yet that yet they have no expectation. You have to surrender to the idea that well that went nowhere This is a candy sharp, no, it's not ever thinks it's a bridge interview where you with my daughter, I think writers I have noticed in particular- are not had that same feeling about improv, because I find writers to be a bit more perfectionists. What's having SAM early in the times up, What happens if you do something now, it's your call Christian is your show. You get to wrap it up. Why did you say I saw you are governed and I saw lights flashed over your head. You started moving around. I got a call same what's going on over the snow, but I am sorry that's where I know especially getting older and not as

does not the people here banal, Ok, so now I'm old, I know no yet in fear or understand I've heard before from, old. As I say I am on Wikipedia. Ok, how would you say you have forty one, for over forty one, I gave you a year later. I fifty eight in real life. Forty one on Wikipedia let deal

I go there every day and I have an David one of David's jobs. Embryos to be known as job is get up every morning and put me down his forty one asked someone always put the back only last about ten minutes yet a full time job here, but he just hammers away at it, and sometimes I haven't doing it during the day. It's like checking is stock. You have to just keep going back forty one reiterated on times we gotta thirty nine loans by now, but forty one everyone accepts if you have enough as a party one year old. Any do you feel, like comedy, I've heard my husband say that sometimes he gave a comedy at the young man game and I hate to call not like that, but that when he's lake really down, I don't agree with that, but I do think you can wrap up a number of times when you're all as you get older, when you haven't been fatty that you could convince yourself that you're not funny anymore.

Is when you younger you, don't have that yet, yes, first of all a number of times when you, when you're, not funny in a row, I can't relate to that. I just can't your time. Ok and that's just seemed weird and foreign to me David. Would you agree? Well anyway, I design a paper for that to know, but I understand exact. What's your husband's talking about- and I know he's a very funny guy nationally- and I know what he's talking about and then I see people around people like Martin Short stay, yeah, yeah Albert Brooks, who are devastatingly funny yeah and not just verbally funny. He purchased in a performative way, funny and and Bob New heart Bob New hardy. I think he's ninety one, ninety two and

he's still is so money and his put dance are fantastic and I think, ok, if I could have thought of that, an age Wikipedia forty one real life If I could have thought of that, I'd be very proud of it I think one of those guys doing how do you copy minors, another one now Brooks where you know very late in life very, very funny and coming up with funny and amusing ideas. I think there's a kind of hunger. Bitch We have when you're younger that fuel stings and helps, and then you ve got a substitute out with something else and the age old question in our businesses. Can you be happy and funny, and that gets tricky because the another at times right? I really love my wife and I love my kids and I can

did it myself extremely lucky, and I enjoy my friends and I look around at all. Then it wasn't always the case that in always have that life. There are times when I look at them and think you guys you assholes are keeping me from being funny you're, giving me I could bring you down bringing me down there me loving them in them lovingly bullshit. I gotta get out of this trap. I got applauded up, so I can reach the next level of funny guy failure to do so. yeah that way lies madness. Here's something that you call me when I was listening to you. It is. We are saying that you know the conditions have to be right. There a good good, committed moment, and I think that is expectations you right at us, and sometimes I found when I was starting up. I had my best lives stage performances of my career before fight conclusions before live you when you were, I went right. I could I

destroy as this wispy little hullo pull the palace their legs yes, and then show them exactly who I was well, I really got in my head later and I wonder if that's all the case too, where were you need to form? a condition for yourself where there is no expectation but mean no expectations from the audience. Renault expectations from myself. That's a question because I'm is both because I've seen it let go the other way to wear, because people know me they're laughing, sometimes before I say anything, the West

I love it. I know what you're talking about man knows last nothin, oh you talking about whom you killed it loud thanks. Everybody ha anyway. My way on his way here on my way here in my car, Yoda car me here believe he's gonna wow, the club owners like hey, you are paid more, even started. Talking is your money and have a good night. I don't know what you're talking love that scenario again and the erratic control well I don't wanna earn it every time. That's the worst why you want to get to the point where you phone it in?

people know it's you it's Christmas, shall we ain't? Oh yeah and your skills decline, but you still get paid and were worry www everybody had a jungle, her face. She showed up. Asher, look like she does when I see or on the tv yea, here's your money, that's the dream. Man pm learn a lot today, yeah yeah, but in disappoint you with my brutal honesty. I didn't the european value about what fun I didn't know, is so funny cause. I had all these things that I thought I was gonna talk about with you that were more about things. You ve done your career and we completely got off track because you'd over Yan economic questions for you I mean you're in a whirl turning point in your life. It's very exciting.

Citing it's it's it's strange to so much as wander the earth now spreading seed, screwing little trees, we'll island. When I ran into John Stewart after he had stopped. I was so worried about him because you know too, in my mind, his exists for doing a show every night when he was the happiest I've ever seen him right. You got to be with his kids, anyone got to watch them grow up and be with his wife and just relax and it was shot. It was shocking to me who always things you shut up, will constantly be making comedy road, but maybe that's you. I have no idea, I think, are spent enough time with my My wife I get it turns talkin about, I guess, like when they were hive and seven. Unlike I got it. You know, and now they're just you know so,

I don't know what that's all about he's gotta work that out himself yet, which is still in its clearly. Some kind of Dodge but I am I dont know I, but I'm definitely like to I liked to make things so it's all about the problem is, if I start making like Mama, planes you now yeah, because I did that over covert I started making balsam. Would I made a ballsy would plain that was really complex and I haven't done anything like that for and I got really obsessed with it and have you seen it David? its gorgeous. Why do we have you city and believe Jesus Christ? David? I mean, let's take a back. You know crystal. I built a model plan that above it was a sop with camel it's beautiful. I put Where is it has dearest hanging over my dad? Has he been? Oh, you have an opt out. You seen it as I was not seen it. It's great

Crises not just last appear. Thank you have been very great times. Show yourself out that I think you really hurt his feelings. I really didn't he doesn't he and I don't have failure? No that's one of the prerequisites of working for me, as I have already said here and go fired yeah so we'll see but yeah. I assume it's gonna be comedy, but if he really hilarious of I just started carving face he's out of apples and joined them and distribute them to the neighbourhood, but I'm like I've never been more creatively, says Will this and we got a rapid. I think employment for quite a while, but you are an absolute delight and it made me happy knowing that you are coming in today, because every time Canada with you you ve, worked with me in the past. You been kind enough to donate time to shoot a crazy things with me, a comecon and you're just, a lovely person and I'm very happy for you.

You found your way in comedy and you'd made so many people happy and its true just by time, Can you can make people happy, which is lovely? That's a great superpower. Man! Well, thank you write that gets things for being my friend guileless scripted here it is, and thank you for all is letting me come on your show and being met. Champion. I will continue to be your champion and I'll have a show just so you can come on it has had They will be. The reason for me to do is show obey, but they should do it, but not every night now, because we are a very place. If you do that down

you coming back at that. If I came back, you know like be funny if I pay back immediately without show, but there was no different than the other shelf. That's hilarious. I would love that daddy very and got media are even will go to Daily Ergo with Elsie. These doubts is still valid dissolute. We would never have done where we again. Yes, everyone bought at the other end then easily eat. I don't you did they give us a few weeks the greatly was a Frank Sinatra. I think in nineteen sixty nine announced I'm retiring, and he said I am, I think, I'm going to tee. But he was gonna go to Yale and teacher Courson and so Frank submitted this big thing like I'm retiring did. Is big financial? I think he was back and six so yeah. I should go back to Turner. We

if he exactly, I show at the whole thing is really no different and and then have a real attitude like you're welcome America yeah why that would piss people off? I can't wait to do that. Memorable Christian. Thank you so much and thank you for being my friend the little trademark. Next to it. Yeah you welcome a trademark agreement. That's great than I gotta be relieved to think. Legally, This is legally binding and small business owners are busy whenever these days her they are yes, you're right times searching for an interview in Kansas can take time away from managing and growing a business. You know I'm kind, the business guy. I've got a lot of it's in the fire you do. I cant do both at the same time. That's why Linkedin jobs is made it easier to get to the candidates worth interviewing faster and it

Free free is my favorite price David. The best price create a free job, posting minutes and linked in jobs to reach your net work and beyond the world's largest professional network of over seven hundred and seventy million people. Folks, on candidates with the skills and experience you need. You screening questions to get your role in front of only the most qualified people then use this. Simple tools are linked in jobs to quickly filter and prioritize, who you'd like to interview and higher see this cuts out so much time on ice linked in jobs. You find a candidate worth interviewing faster. Did you know three week, nearly forty million job seekers visit linked in post, your job, free it linked and dot com, Slash, Conan, that's Lincoln, Dotcom, slash, gonna deposed your job for free terms and conditions, apply Our big things are afoot over here: a team, cocoa team. Cocoa now has a tick tock and its at team. Cocoa. David

you're here to help us today I can I just say before we get into David. I have been the team. use this term loosely my team of experts, people there twice. Thirty's have been telling me for a while Conan you ve gotta make tick talks. I don't know what you're talking about sounds stupid, Anne and I know it's a big thing out there, but no I'm not me. Tik Tok, I'm a ninety five year old man- and you know I did great things in world war, one to save our country, and I resent being told that I have to make a tick tock when I don't even know what it is. Does Matt due notice, my tiktok, I know what they are and where they come from, but I kind of that's all I care to no matter how about you and I are similar, vintage Matt end. We aren't into this tik Tok Faint, a minute. What I'm just guessing by the look of you that Europe, these are my age, are much older.

There are thirty, eight sure, yeah, really you thirty, eight no ok was still moisturize manufactured apart. Make a TED talk about that. Whilst ok, you just piped up sorry, I know you tell me be quiet Neuro. I never reveal that. I tell you why you're allowed to say whatever you on what I was going to say to you was that you could help us. You can. C is crazies this sounds. You could actually be of help to us David. Ok, you could be useful and help. You sound shocked that I could be useful. No, I made it very clear, don't sound shocked. I am sure you could actually benefit us. This is insane the world is turned upside down. Tell us about this. Tiktok thing will first of all its super addicting. Once you get started, you're not gonna want to stop oh, it's basically like a instagram, but just for videos. I know you're doing really well on Tik Tok, whether or not you know at the team cocoa.

I think he's doing really. Well, I dont even know that I'm on what you mean, I don't make Tik Tok stu I you're on it. How can I be honoured? If I don't even know what it is this we were talking about? There is now a team. Cocoa account there's a team cocoa and what I put up our sins. I thought a tick tock meant that have to be dancing and singing with my not we're both embarrassing there's like different sites to tick tock for everything Oh, I always thought it was people singing into a brush. Some motown song You know a grandmothers doing it and her daughters doing it and a granddaughters doing it is awful. It's all awful. I thought that's what Tik Tok. What nuts I mean, that is, a side of Tik Tok right, pretty much any interest you could have like theirs. Hashtag history, talk fer, you know you like history and issues, people giving. three facts: there is Taylor, Swift, just joined Tik Tok yesterday, so swift talk is just trending of people making videos about Taylor. Swift, I swear to God,

But I didn't know that there were tick talks about history, the ass it talks about music, some of the things that I might be interested in it was all perform. It is, people ring LULU Lemon and doing like a funny dance, and then you know clucking like a chicken and bring churches on there I mean that's for sure part of bananas every part of it ok. Well, I would want nothing to do with that part by couldn't get heads would agree yeah, I don't wanna and also on a one to embarrass my children, any more than I have. My parent might much older embarrassed by everything I do so. I gotta watch that or are they just won't speak to me anymore? You're, a hundred and fifty eight thousand followers on Tik Tok, but but what are my tik tok? So I don't know what that what you're talking about they post lake clips from the pocket as close from your show, different energy. You have done so we're all on this thing, tat I think that on this issue, or what is this contraption? Is

on the radio people like the big tik Tok creators. Will by mansions. Together with all the living in a house making videos used to do for Instagram, it's all repeating it some out now time. You know only the platforms change an end. I didn't mean that Census that was our platform and bite. But you know what I've talked about this before but I worry that we are a few years away from nobody growing food, because- and I wrote an article about this once it's out there somewhere. I'm turn remember where I work it's on Tiktok, because until now, a dinner a peace and actually really liked right described a world where. everyone just got into it

revising and making videos and being wise guys and the economy collapsed, and farmers stop growing food because they were making ironic videos with a sort of pretend to grow food, but dont really in its Mehta, and it was this- is total collapse of society. I became very just told me that I think Tik Tok is gonna get us there. I really do. I really think that this could be the beginning of the very very yeah and David explain this. If Instagram has the same features, what's the deal, that's what get your stuff out to more people. So I kill me put up, for example, for there is, there is like a fool: Are you page and then a following pay what's happening to that person is the first many other popped up actually have some like that she's singing into a hair brush and pouring chattered she's on her head. Oh looks like she's in danger and is trying to get help, what's happening, so that's a filter on her or what it has heard getting ready. I think that's like heard me.

that's what she dies, but then there is also a following page, which you are actually not following anybody. You ve just follow yourself. Also, I see conning takes Jordan to be all of garden. That's a remote that we shot, and Jordan works for me and he's a big snob about italian foods. I took him to the olive garden and a bus that clipped here talk and ok I'll, go out to lots of people. Ok We have some examples here of of tick talks too. There are loaded up as a right yeah, that's what I think are some that I've done yeah. You ve curated these yourselves, because we should mention that you yourself are kind of Tik Tok yeah. Is it too much to say no? No, no, which the way is it? Is it what I say David? Is this correct you're quite that Tik Tok, that's correct! Do you engage in Tik Tok, very new relays, known just talk. I was engaged in skulduggery until Toggery. I became way to addicted to it over

work from home the last, so you may create tick talks. What if this turns into you, showing us tick tax, but it's an intervention for you all areas. We much needed. We have your family in the next room. They pop up indiscreet they're, not here they're, not here, for the intervention it just here for free food. what will show us show us which one first and will describe it as we can Let's start with so I started so my the time jasmine, an eye. Whenever we started quarantine, we would this drink wine, and then we decided to just make Tik Tok after we had a few glasses of wine, so I think the first one is like the first week. I'm gonna take talk of us working from home. Ok, let's take a look. This is you and jasmine, getting drunk and making a tick tock. This took away too long. Actually, ok,

cutting around there's a strip of whole. Was there a strip of pull in your jasmine? Had it yeah she like installed, it enter and Johnson was a roommate, and so it's you too and you're there's a lot of rapid cuts of you and what's the song pledge to the fifth harmony song work from home, because we were working from home now You are working it from home. This video. I have some complaints. The rug rug is very prominent. Looks just like a very cheap synthetic shag and looks like it's mostly made of scotch guard. So I don't like that. I think those new carpet, though they are well it's a great color cause it to if someone vomited on it you'd. Never. Yet I beg criticism about this tiktok. As you know, I think I'd be a good tik Tok director because I haven't, I engaging Tik Tok hurry, but I could be a director.

Of aforementioned talk isms, and I Could I could tell people lose that rug. What's that being hang in the, background is that of being. I chair, you guys, hurts you know I would. I would have a clean it up a little bit. The lighting isn't. Terrific, sir, is our first one, I'm sorry to be rough on you. It's ok, yeah swung into most people drink a lot before they make a tick tock. I don't think so. It's just like what we d like what else responsible working from home was done during business hours, so you don't want. Certainly ask one question: David you're employee. Did you see any cessation in payment in cove? It will you being? aid less you getting less money because you are working from home, you're being paid in full. Yes, sir, yes, ok and so oh, do you think it's possible that you are making tick talks on my time? I want it

it's not possible. Ok, it sounds to me like Conan. You funded this and therefore give production credit you're the producer of this tick too. I am I whatever I may and I hear you're doing well and Tiktok and I bet seventy percent of a tick talks. You ve made have and under my employ during business hours, true or false? True, you owe me a card, but I always I have my phone ready in case. You need something! No, but you understand its implicit. That between the hours of nine o clock in the morning and said clock at night or anything You do has to be pursuing my interests, one I kind of is cause I'm showing you how to tick. Tock for yours, nice ACE, David wow. You know. I actually think this is all the perfect set up. We ve seen one and that we should continue this as a cliffhanger segment,

ex part in the yes. We can't do this in one segment. This is gonna, be too segments. I am learning to tick tock, along with, Goarly Mcintyre, both elderly gentleman, but we're learning the fine art of Tik Tok hurry and we are being instructed. By my my assistant, David hopping, whose filling in for some ossetian and you're going to teach us more in the next segment. And things are

Creasy, Colonel Ryan needs a friend with Conan O Brien Saddam Hussein and MAC whirling produced by me. The mat goarly executive, produced by Adam Sacks Joanna Solitaire off and Jeff Ross at team cocoa, and call an Anderson at your Wolf theme, song by the White Stripes incidental music by Jimmy Vena Takeaway, Jimmy our supervising producers, an layer and our associates, talent, producers, Jennifer samples engineering. By will back the talent booking by Polish Avis, Juno, Battista and brick com. You can write and review the show and apple podcast, and you might find your review read on a future episode, got a question for Conan call the team cocoa Hotline at three two three four five one, two eight to one and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode and if you haven't already, please subscribed. Conan o Brien needs a friend on Apple podcast, stature or wherever fine broadcasts are down.

This has been eighteen, cocoa production in association with. from Iraq to strap tests. Theres many clinic at CBS see a provider fella prescription and grab essentials or cs online. With tell how options that's healthier made easier visit manacling, Got CV asked today, services very by location, seeming to conduct outcome for details.