As triplet every sunday nights at eight p m: seven central travel, gentle, I'm on tour, Cincinnati port, Baltimore, gotta berber com, get a shirt, love your family. This episode, Matt MIRA, The check check. Alright, I think we're recording yeah. We are officially recording sweet. Do you guys tape the show up there? We we've taped a few up there We built the we built a studio and now PETE holmes uses it the most. I just did one as you said pizza there you made it weird. I did have an advantage ten of them, it's interesting when you, when you, when you do broadcasts get a big response and then also

you do a park ass. It you never heard of in an you Life holy shit, that's a brain is an advance on every avenue exist. Actually it's cross over this is cross over. Are you death squad friendly? How do you do like red bands anyone's I've? I've never done it. I was going to the egg is starting to do contemporaries, podcast, which is sort of We are one of those who start from the fucking. Beatitude treasure assess the man cave. Ok, Ok, this whole started this all started because I was in a thousand minneapolis. You made a statement which I would not disagree with. However, I am I place, do you like that. Do not have a future to a fucking, be max rider. Here's what I said for those listening. I was home. It was a typical added air sunday. I don't know D, I why network was run a marathon

I don't have a have a man cave said that myself, but you know what I'll check this out say. I like it when they're building stuff well yeah d, I Y I work for the same family scripts write his own drone travel table and all and I worked travel gentle and and they own the. Why so keep going alright, so I'm watching it and I'm just I'm just looking at it, I'm enjoying I'm enjoying the construction of it. But then the thing that got me was just by the second, if I said I was like this guy's, a dick, the guy that wanted the man cave though, and it's always the wife it's like well, you know, I guess you should have his own space and get the fuck out of my house. That kind of bullshit, and I'm just like This is most insane thing, even the pudding, beer terms which the guy after you're out there that I can't afford. For eggs for them.

I will say I will say, keep going to remind me to talk about gangs yesterday that guy's not going to be able to afford it he's not going to be cooking steaks out there all the time it affords takes all the time. You're do anything in this wonderful room when I just wanna call it a finnish fucking basement, it's just a finn basement. I did something with the goddamn based, but you know you to call it. A man cave term itself is just so dickie list the fucking, not a cave and its. You a sex. Anybody can go down there. It's just. Usually you put a nice television laced with a comfortable chair uk. Call it a man cave because of that a real give. I want like a pool table to rise from the law yet for some like, like I just you know, we're like a bat cave how I like yeah or like gold fingers place in kentucky when you know them

the math, the total comes up. I don't perform it nervous meltdown. I don't get that reference for James bond movie, traditionally thought of as the best james bond. I fucking love your figure as a player. He shows all the mobs. This is the time when you hang out what to do with different interests than yourself like one of my good friends, my wife fucked this up, but one of my good friends was this guy named matt, I fought for gay as us, namely that of the above us when we the delaware miles, and he will. As an iso. I say this. I am peasant ever use the word nerd, because it was like a negative term when I was growing up, but he was a nerd. He was really into like comic books and superheroes, and that and he won, I we got high. And he was like whose I got. Why would you do any of this? I'm going to watch a movie. I saw a movie because you would like it, and I said why cause I'm a meathead, I'm a regular fucking, I'm a regular,

I never was called a nerd. My entire life growing up I played sports are lettered was like that. I was that guy and he knows me, but we We like cigars, and he goes it's a league of extraordinary gentlemen that you wouldn't enjoy it and I went what is it and he goes, I'm not even going to tell you cause you're gonna make fun of me. That I'm a forty year old man, I'm excited about this movie. I said we're just tell me about it and he tells about it may get excited no one. I this is cool or I'm gonna go technical seriously as a tool his room? We watched it orange juice out, his apartments watch it and I fucking loved it and I liked getting into the obsessive part, but the problem is, I don't have that. I don't have that gene that, like I can do, that. I don't have the gene that can sit and like read the walking dead, graphic novels or like. I can't like what you read. I urge the jive, ok yeah, I got a job and I got and then google myself,

of course so so so he lives any sort masterpieces inertia about surrendering so others backtrack. So then, so then you observation and yet needed a thirty percent are like fuck these guys. So, we treat was I tweeted After watching three episodes of dna, wise man, I've decided that I don't want Friends of anyone who wants or has a man came now. Yes, I start giving tweets. Yes, because that's what that's? What it is, it's just about a hall monitor bird bird he's already shit about. You know as I read it, and I laugh because it's a funny tweet and I watch this show too, and I in my head- I'm like it's like you know, look It was the first time I watched the show I was like. I want one of those. That's all. I thought I didn't think anything. Judging of the people When is it? Your idea was dear? What was its line on whose maya I believe in putting out

putting out what you want in life yasser hard core. I want a four camera sit, come the shoots in hollywood, love it that's what I want and yeah. There's nothing left to run. Them is only luck in talking about you put it out there and it comes to you right and my wife's anyway, that nerdy neighbour a heart. So I so we bought this house I this house, I was not a fan of the house. This room, area right here was attached to the garage. It was a walk. The walk through like right with that wine traitor. It is, of course, which you ve kept so nicely. If actually it's not bad, is it ok to drink wine? That is your favorite. Are you shitting me? Is a google me, though, so that was close with they close that off, but what happened is about me. I saw this area. My dad was like ma body, you get, you should build, a man came back it'll be really nice, but it was a woodworking shop. This area, when I was like I was like yeah, it would be nice in my head. I was like,

that'll be my dream by this house so that I can just ultimately one day I'll work on this and I like doing handy ice type shit on I'm not good at it, so he bought the house and then my wife. And there's a show, man cave, you should get or man caves, and I was again knew there was a cross over biting no work working. Then one thousand and up front. Dallas and I literally won't run up to the s. Vp of Why Andy singer? Who is now my boss sector, has an automatic cave and he was like out aims. I will we do that we should do that and he was like very like you said we should do some crossover stuff yeah. He was yeah. Well, you know we'll talk about that. so that everyone I was going to make it and then he jokingly said, but I went he went to nourish afford I to for state here's the I give you if I'm going, to put gators shit all over it. Hence those gator heads right there so, and so I got to keep them there out of respect, of course, but but so yeah I got a man cave. It was me, This was a major getting supposed beams and here oh hi seriously, it's beautiful it's it. It is gorgeous

act. It's nice to morrow. I will say of the three main case I saw you finished this is best. One Rainn wilson has the best one. Oh really, apparently did he do now? What's the deal here, do you guys split cost, or do they say here nigga you got it, you got it well, yeah, no, okay, you look around you like something fucking, it's a gift from the gods made here's the thing and townhouses yeah you look around here's I love! These are the things I love about it. So if you look at this, I can close this and that the map, the cost is online travel around our pretty fucking arise over there, innovation idea. You had some james bond shit right there. That is that's very much james bond shit and then you get the comedy records to get tennyson up there, tennyson Andy Griffith of course, box and then, of course, pryor. But I can't I got my wife's like you've got to take them down

the words and that one of my daughter's can read so tight, fuckin seriously and so then I got pictures of like things. I've done. It was weird to say just put those up and I wanted to change them out, but I never have yeah, of course, you're not going to and then yeah and then the here's. The funny thing about calculators. Yes, okay, graders are really a great idea on paper yeah, but man. It is a pain in the fucking ass, a lot of upkeep like dating a stripper like you've, got to clean out the holes like it's it's a nightmare. So, like I got to keg reddit and I was like this is great, bought the first keg and then used it and then didn't use it for like three months, yep cause you. Is it so much easier to just as is full of beer? Now, oh shit, yeah, that's it was to do tat is useless

I have some guy come in and clean the lines like you can't use. My bars have people that do that yeah for a living yet have they go clean the lines out? It's so funny, though yeah the but but I will say my experience with man cave was a fucking. I was like the best thing that one of the best things that ever happen to me I'm going to I'm going to walk. Episode I'm going to download it. Oh I look so fucking unmanly in it. I'm such a face like you're talking to a guy wearing cargo shorts. So I'm on board this not looking manly wait what sweet too! Okay! So that's a Yes, I dress sure, and then so, let's talk about the nerd concept than earth. Yes, are you are you? Are you like self proclaimed nerd, or were you really like an hour grown up? Now I mean I was. I was now yeah I was nerdy in the set there were found out. I was in sixth grade again. To a party, and I showed up dress like scotty from star trek.

Oh my god. Do you know how much and years you'd think that makes me like you so much see. There's a thing I have like that. I think I think everyone has is like. Sometimes you see people jump on the. Bandwagon try to make a dollar same way. People did with blue collar. I may be crazy when you do stand up. People like like, I just you know it's like. Oh, I, like those guys, I'm a blue collar guy. Let's fix my car, what you say, bullshit fuck you you trying to hold onto a brand. You don't be brave our rapporteur, has tell me what I read or to be who the fuck. You are in the end that- and I would like that you would like, but when I saw you walking up the of my for your nose, like I think, you're genuinely, if you're like yeah you're like are, you are who the fuck you are yeah yeah. I have a hoodie and a beard and a fat nerd off of the bat. Now I just it's a thing, and it's it's become a thing where your leg, you kind of sea nerd, posers out there and some people call hardworking nerd poser. But if you look at that, guy's fuckin background of latin, a p latin

as starting. The chess club is, if you listen, if you listen to your podcast at all, you understand that it is his passion. You know what he is he's a foot he's a nerd with a fucking. I lost his emerged with money in words. Why you see him on talking dead in like great looking blazers and ties that matches whatever fucking plaid path? a non chris for a long time. I've known him. I knew him, at the same executive producer that produce singled out produced my first tv show, so we used to pass each other just randomly and we were both on working comics and so, and we were always going out for like the same pilots yeah, so but yeah. I don't I never. I never thought of him. I never thought I never think of anyone in comedy, I think of as the same kin. Yeah yeah like. I believe that if you start in this business, as an open maker and work your way eyelash there there's a hard

I still run it. I still run an open mic at meltdown really on Sunday nights really don't show up to it as much as I used to, but that we used to. We used to be called Matt Myers day off yeah, because it was like my one day off from work for sundays and I would host the open mic and we'd have like eddie comics going up and it was it was great and it would know what stand up like there is it is it? Is it john, sensitive like do you have to like talk about comics and stuff cause? I was saying I was saying this as someone I was just there to do. Pizza thing, I swear when I say this not an ominous mean as disrespectfully anyone but like I was shocked that it was made for adults, because I was like at the store yeah like the store. I didn't know that that I was like I thought, was a kids store. I was like what the fuck we do, and then I was like oh shit. This is straight up for people who love comic books I didn't. I don't think I understood that at all and then I was like ours I was blown away, actual got a cup of coffee came back and then

a reassessment of it. Cause was like running late and and those like we where's the fuck. I heard that It shows there, but I didn't know like I couldn't put my head around it. Did you go? Did you go in the back and see the little space I did its put there haven't like some artist talking with all like using the billy afternoon evolution cool. It's a great it's a great space and the guy runs a guest on he is such a guy he's a guy that just loves comics loves the genre and the store it's the best comic bookstore in the country. I think like just the the sheer amount of stuff they have there for everything and they have like. toys. They have like just everything up yeah. I was like art in the back hanging up of leg, mickey mouse, fucking, many and stuff like that I was. I was genuinely jealous that I'm not interested in that shows like us. Well, I would love to find a place like this at something. Like I was saying to someone. I I go to sporting goods stores yeah, like I'm walking around sporting goods for hours, like I literally don't need to

I think dicks sporting good are already got too don't get me onto a. I work, the first floor hardcore and then hit the second then come back down and hit the weights. you know I got an idea. I fucking love, I'm as my dad boots, because my dad and will connect. He was a runner and we can by him going to get shoes are going sporting this or so we just gotta supporting this goods. Alex saturdays will go to sports on nice to go all the time with my my dad was in the army and then really yeah. He was a for twenty something years, like he retired. Really he signed up before vietnam cause. He was like they're going to pull my draft number and they actually pulled his number third anyway, but he was already signed up and he got out. He was retired, he had been rich, he retired and then the first gulf war happened and then they called them back up. So then he had to go to Iraq.

But as he was going over to Iraq, the war and because it was like a four day, yeah thing: oh yeah, all them up and like, and I was like sequitur you, the youngest yeah. It was the youngest of four really yeah, so my brother but my sister, while I sisters forty one forty two forty four brothers board and seventy six What's it like having like, like so I'm gabrielle, broad stroking, there's nobody's gonna go enabling the northeast. You got a sister, my age brother, probably my age too, but I have two sisters and a brother and then me but, like you are probably very liberal yeah, I did yeah, but they probably grew up a tad bit more conservative because their life's what they experienced in life was very different than what you experienced in life. I yeah, I think so, I don't know where the departure happen and here's the fun thing about my family in two thousand, for my parents sold the house and then they moved to Florida, we're orlando and I was supposed to move to florida.

because I was twenty. I was not transfer to use e f ones will yeah and though the plan was yet transfer to you see, I finish up collar when I was gonna move, we can either mutiny work or delay the duke harmony? That was my plan. So what happened? Was we move We got everything down there must that must have stolen storage by the way in orlando in orlando. Just for the record, it's fucking moldy a shit, I'm sure yeah, it's a climate, controlled storage facility, but okay, I don't even I don't even want to see anything down there, but the so we got there. And every time we were in. My aunt had passed away left my dad the con there, her condo, so the one bedroom, condo and my billings, who I don't know when they ll ever be self sufficient there, those types of people up so they my brother, had moved down with his wife,

kids. They lived in clear water over house clearwater above the above in florida so well, yeah yeah. You know what the there well here's the thing I got there It was a one bedroom condo that we were staying in and we're just staying there until they had the money from a house that they just sold them in in massachusetts, and they were going to the plan was to buy it. You know, buy a house as a guest room, a couple of bedrooms and a pool great, but we got down there and it says one bedroom place, and I was just I just fucking freaked out because, like you know, I would wake up in the morning and I'd be like what the fuck and do today. I need to find a job and then I will just go down seminal drive and go to the barnes and noble and I would just be Margaret I would like is this. My fucking life I walked out of the bar the noble and there's like a christ superstore across the street and like this. What is this place and only that it was june. I think when we moved

so all of our skin blistering humid I'd ever experienced my life, so I got I got home, it was, I made it made it six days and made it six days living in florida really yeah and I got home and I said to my mother, I was like I have to buy a plane ticket back to boston and and- and I can't I can't do this- I'm not going to really simple just move back to boston. I move back. Move back to buses stay with my buddies and lol, who ran a funeral home so there and work out your oh, you serious yeah, my god. If I could kill myself, I couldn't deal with death. Like that you get really desensitized to it. It really really quickly really yeah. I couldn't do it. I'd fucking put a gun in my mouth. I'm freaking out. I can't even talk about death of start up an anxiety, well sweets. And so then so then, when did you start doing stand up? I started doing stand up so my okay, so I went back up to massachusetts. Two thousand and four went back to school full time

I got into the improv thing at my school then I was like this is kind of I just want to. It was then arrested. Development was on at the time. So as two thousand and forty five and I was watching it, I was like this is this is fucking amazing. This is what I want to do. I want to write. I wanna write comedy that I want to write comedy. There really was a great show. I was so good. It was so good The cautiously optimistic about the netflix run. That's gonna happen echo. What a day doing it or something there their them. Thirteen episodes Really. How do you know this? Because I don't want to go I'm so of so I'm so I'm so fucking obsessed with my the tribe not including this one though I I heard there was going to be a movie or something while they were going to do yeah they're going to, but then they were like well, let's do some episodes that'll lead up to a movie; okay, they did they did like ten or eleven episodes and they're going to premiere in may now, I'm trying to think of effects. You might not

know that you'll be like shut up get outta here here, but those are the types and then I was I was in the writing program at school. I went to the art institute, which was, which is the thing that you see when you're watching jerry springer it's the school they play commercials for so it's one of those for profit, like I t t tech kind of are there art institute, is geared towards the arts or whenever my major was digital media production, which was encompassing everything and hung over the budget called grocery and then one of them is like my major's mass media, and that was the one major I could get into right. When I was going to college- and I was like I was like- oh fucking- god forbid, she goes. Oh you'd be great. Like we talk about twitter and I was like oh shit. Mass media when I was in college, was like nothing there like the news like there was no such thing as like fuckin. What is

technically mass media these days. No, it's it's! It's! It's a bizarre flashed that we saw we we lived. I remember, remember getting too addressing college and going I'll, never use this, you gotta dot, Edu and oh yeah. I was like yeah good luck. I remember that. I remember that one of our one of our things was one of our homeworks for creative writing was all you had to do was take the paper we had previously written and email it to the professor we had to email it I was so fucking lost. I can't even tell you I was like. I have no idea what how do I, how do I do that and they were like they were like what you do. Is you go in you cut and paste, and I was like all by their now. I know what I hear myself think about it. I'm like what fucking idiot I was like. I hope. how do I caught and there were like you caught you pay? Is it on one email and your email, and I was like I was. I remember thinking this- will never last no one's going to be doing this shit. Oh it's insane! I, when I got to school when I got to college that was sort of the birth of myspace was when I was in college.

I spoke to another friend. Yes, go sitting in venice beach, a pile of cocaine sitting on a table, three dude fucking gagged out of their minds. About this program and they're doing for a brand new thing. Could you hold on to you know, keep me comedian named dane cook and I was like yeah he's gonna be parties is a region with a guy like you, I would be the guy he's huge on we're going. italy, and also their programming, fucking myspace, german myspace dane literally months later called me to his house just to hang out and told me bert, you gotta get on this friendster at the time was one gotta get on friends. For you guys chat with fans. You gotta establish a fucking fanbase. These people love it look, look watch these people and I was like good luck. Can pass that bubble. I don't think I ever broke six thousand friends on myspace. My myspace page still exists. Oh everyone's does embarrassing. I wonder how many friends I have now I can't even I don't even have- and I looked to see if like if I had probably about a year and a half ago

see if I'd had any new followers and, lastly, really bad luck. Now, now you have a clue. You know what it does now it it pulls off of your twitter really so it it you're still updating posts, I space for people in the Middle east to just found myspace or whoever. So we go back or yellow such as cars and have it the site side. Note bad as I was in college when I was in college in boston when facebook happened when the facebook app and really I was like what is this: the facebook, because Zucker is like a year older than me, so I was like and it was like just these harvard kids that were lives like the offs awaits you gotta be in school to do it as a gay they're like yeah, you gotta, just so you're in college. So now you can beyond this fate because it was just after they'd opened it up out of harvard into other just colleges yeah

then I got a facebook page and I was like this is it this is. Nothing is going to get better than than what we have right now and the fucking is just in now, and I've had to like, take my facebook and like hide it and make it private and stuff like that, just because I just it got weird when, like Some old post, something on my time line of that my mother would write something I can't and on whenever the earth? As I guess it's just? Oh you just disconnect. I just disconnect. I don't. I have no connection to facebook whatsoever. I don't even I I go yup like people post on things. Hey your friend died and I'm like I had that happen. Like I go hey, I have no connection to anything that happens on. I think twitter and twitter I'm the same way with twitter. I don't have. I don't believe that I believe, if I don't read it, it didn't happen. Oh sure I just. I, like there are things like I've been so funny. I take a complement to the growing assault, fuckin insults or comments.

some really puzzled and I stopped going. I started ten, I'm not going to give it the power will give it the power to. Let me get depressed about it, and so I will like I use it in all positivity and in the end, I don't think so. Many people are fucking in saying that I grew up with that are obsessed with facebook and that's all they do is run facebook all day long and I look at them going. Oh, you haven't even figured out twitter, yet vine, Did you find a vine fuck? You lose your mind, it's it's a weird thing and like all these people that I went to high school with- and I just like that. At the point where you're like I don't care anymore, I don't I'm not. I have like a facebook fan page that tune as a user friendly, so I dont really do much. I mean I will every now and then I'll, look at it and go oh cool, a lot of activity or whatever no activity. Do you read like youtube page comments, and no, I see I made the big mistake of. Let me let me phrase that I used to

and then I of the native want to upset me and I just in care, and then I watch this guy. I was too few people lose their mind Those there s an end. I had. I had some very public beef with someone that I've that made me lose my mind, Rosa gonna. This none of this fuck managed to me like a I'm. Only the home for fuckin two days a week and I'm in a let other drama fucking dictate my energy out. That's that's crazy. I can't role home to hang on. My kids, the two days, I'm home and have been like shit. I can, in fact I can't change, and so I just I tapped out emotionally with all that shit and an end to get there. I have there yet, but I would like to get their own money and I'm gonna like there's a lot. You you'll changed a lot The next eleven years tenure yeah just a lot like creatively how long you been osanna six years. Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah, so you really care about the art form yeah.

This point will allow well versed in all of the comedy I its stated very interesting just oh, no, I'm reiterating old things are placed at a million times, but just when you get really good at it, and you start making money is search, become grind yet in the road really becomes exhausting like I do the road I road half of the year and I do t v, the other half the year. Yeah so and your tv is travel. Channel travel generally have some traveling, so I'm always gone and so like I, but it's interesting because when you get your voice, like I've, been doing it fifteen years. I think I just found I just go to a place, run very comfortable on stage nah. I don't I'm not trying at all. I found my voice very early though, but like I just wish that I had the passion I did when I was like four years in six years in because when you other passenger hungary in your fuckin, send me on the road I give a shit now scale on MIKE. I really miss my family

I want to come on home yeah, it gets it gets like that. I mean we'll go through, will go through stretches of the road traveling yeah we do like the like will take the nerds podcast on the road, sometimes really yeah, and I've done. You know. I've done some dates with Doug benson and. Stuff like that, so Doug's a great guy fantastic. He really is one of the greatest guys and dogmas guys. You can sit and learn like what he's really quick. his and the way he thinks kind of its like it's almost like staff fire. I love watching him. I love doing a with them with a big group people and watching him kind of dismay tall things. You say or pick apart things you say or yeah I get a real kick out of Doug. I would love to do a date with him. I'd love to do more dates with more people yeah, I just do a by myself here headline outrageously, dear dear, do you do Taken middle learn lay just deal with whenever possible. A lot of times. It is going to have you like its opinion,

ass may need one guy that you like married to and then you need him to literally drop everything for your schedule in order. take him everywhere and that just doesn't exist anymore. I mean. Do you have been doing like yourself like you, do have been doing it for six years. How have working jobs in show business or have very successful podcast, or do the do or love to work and allay like when I started you could. I would give up everything to go with someone harpy. Well, I just got readers. I just finished up the nervous tv show which we were doing for a bbc, so we shot him all and now still for those who are listening there and an eye, but should have said at the beginning of august, you're you're, a cop, on the very popular nervous pie, gala day, yes, so arrests are mere. I dont worry about everyone. Does it there's there's a there's. A big macs guy gave me as yet hours, he asked the difference. Myra with one arm is just fine. It's ok, I've got an ironic. I thought. Ben Hoffman was met hoffman the electorate are, of course, this will have a fucking, rogan podcast thinking.

what're, you shit, I'm not otherwise been juggernaut, fucking, half pint civil life he's great. I wish I had implementation game they measuring like the mere thought so weights. So you do you think I was about to idea. You did the geopolitical interests rather so what is in order to be sure it's it's. It's essentially like a talk show that on BBC after doctor, who and orphaned black their saturday night lineup BBC, z, maritime and air is unlike space, tv in canada and some other places in another country. Dude tore canada. I love That is the ban on canada, fucking Canada, unlike for five shows in canada, Every time I got canada, something love blocking they hack out. there were two other money. They're fucking sensibly he is awesome. I fucking. I'm obsessed with Canada right now up until like too ago I carried around canadian money, smells like maple syrup

its grave everybody likes leaving you twenty that are see through it's crazy it I came home with. a moment just anti shortsighted bugging. Staggered twenties and I was a kid way money? That's what I fucking love, kinda, canada, really, canada, knives. Others before me, Canada took. All of america's ideals and implemented them correctly, yeah, that's I'll, say that exactly what they they I had a blast. I had a blast. I don't wanna suck canada's dick now, but have you been failure I haven't been to. Oh, I hear amazing things about Austria, Australia, canada is hot sister, australia is ideal, but it's so fucking far away yeah! That's the thing! That's the only problem we can with australia. Is they just move that island a little closer enough? I can do it cause. I have this thing of like I have this thing where, at this point in my life, I've never gone to the bathroom on a plane like not number one just number two, neither what I've never even seen the inside of an airplane bathroom

I become. I would get a cd about it now and I am a cod about it. I just went to london ten and a half hour flight and eleven and a half the way back. How did you do it? Didn't get? Didn't I just I just spaced, incorrectly, and do you not delivering our broad, not on the plane I want to piss I drink like official I am not all that I took a shit on the plane today roger growler. I couldn't even imagine this would happen as I got up my folks early this morning and ahead, couple glass of water. I, when I woke up a drive to drink like about a war right when they go to a shower two beers on the hard drive into the airport and got the airport have like three beers. Before we took off and then all of a sudden all that liquid is built up, and I was on the plane. I was like fuck yeah, there's going to be bad and I almost did. It almost feel it almost said: shut the fuck up, when I'd read it too cause. I don't know what I said and I here's the point of what I was taught in a tweet

It smelled, really good smell, like oranges, and I was like what the fuck did. I eat last night cause I was in there. I was like this smell bad. I'm not embarrassed to this, but almost That knows again I'll pull them back, but you you I? I could never not well it's funny I drove when I moved to l a I drove out from Massachusetts and I didn't stop for the bathroom with a friend or by yourself with a friend, and I didn't have to stop to go to the bathroom the entire time. I have like this weird camel ability but but here's the thing that goes away as soon as I start drinking water like a suitor, our drinking water, I'm paying just for the right when you just read the zealous like, amazingly it's to me. It's just regular like if you drink. This is amazing. I don't understand where my pee comes out clear. I'm like what is happening. You drink you drink beers, yeah! I do okay, yeah, sweet, I'm a stout man! I enjoy the guinness you're drinking a beer and hear of yolen work through coffee, yeah, okay, when they tried that fucking like rocket beer that that had caffeine and if no, I don't

I I I've been through the. I remember zuma, zuma, oh sure, his email, no! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No, no! No, I wonder how I was I was goes zuma. Guy owes its demagogues when I started drinking beer is one zero came out like fucking just in time. If this is at an end of the year, clearly, canadian added so I've we, but we use, I and banners things. Do you ever, I tweeted ones that I would constantly order me enough ice. If not for the stigma like it to be in a borrowed orders. wife all the time. If there wasn't a stigma attached to it, yeah have been smeared off. I show up at work at attack of the show or show up at work and on. My desk is a fucking case and I open up the gate and it's a letter from the people at smirnoff. It said: hey matt, we know, there's a stigma maybe you should reconsider and is like a whole fucking case that I can beat that

Go ahead, I'm already so I was in the morning, I'm in san, diego shooting and shooting trip flip and the girls that we had gotten for trip flip and I just thought about combos and they gave me buffalo and blue these combos are like we were just at the store. We noticed he liked said something about combos. We got these as a present. I had to take a car back to the back to l a so get in my car and I start to run back into my god. These are fucking awesome. The next day I fly to new york and I'm in new york- and I buy them again like I was like motherfucker- saw a tweet, combos, combos, you're redefining my pal it right now. I said you're really blowing near the water. I said I'm going also they thinking of new labour combinations, anyone as five accommodation tweeted. the encumbers right. Within a matter of minutes, three thousand people treat decompose right, combo, direct messages, be, and it's like well man, what the fuck are you doing like this? This is ridiculous and then like

If the data like this is crazy man, you really get us a lot of heat. They only have like one thousand followers at the time and they're like us. Really appreciate it. How can we re you back? Visibly cupboards they were like seriously. I go Europe and so me an address they sent for huge boxes. do you love, but by the time I was cousin was stoner was living in. My marriage gave him in his best friend. They were living here and I was on the road. They fucking would smoke pot just eat both after combo. Heaven on earth is such a cool thing when you and then- and then I was I bet I started looking at brands. I wanted to be above with an earth like butter, vigorous butter, fingers, look it befits. Speed up eyes is not bad and give a morning flight out a texas, and you want like a bit,

or specifically, I died four and a half just by stuart story. Out of texas. I was like one night. It was like. I was like here. I am trying to put down beers in the morning to get on the plane. Why don't you trust me? It'll voice? Everyone fucking says it's good. It's really fucking good, looking sprite of beer yeah, it's really delicious, it's like a jolly rancher art, so good, even the watermelon, I hate watermelon flavored everything else, smirnoff ice. Why is it that watermelon flavored everything like you can't drink thing like watermelon yeah, it just sucks? I know I dunno. I was in a car with my buddy one time. Water is black and I had watermelon bubblegum and he was like. Oh we're going to go. You've got more dominoes a year ago, you'll love it it's water not not like meaning he's back, you'll love it, but meaning that's the best flavour bubblegum, and he was right. It was like. I didn't mean like that. He was like sure you didn't have your tag glasses bit about being in the car and trying to go to the watermelon festival and that they needed to ask directions,

They place. It is a black men like ask- and I know you can't ask first in bermuda respite. if you're wearing a t, shirt that says waterfront festival, two thousand and seven you can't get out of the cockpit that's complete retard is Todd's on Nerdist what are the network air work that iceland I started podcasting I started in two thousand eight. I produced todd glasses for a spike ass, tat glass. Heavy door, had a pike s called comedy and everything else. I know that I we hold on www there for that. Cease absurd problem of suggestion. or what you would remember that left. oh, it was the kyle was the kyle cease thing was that the whole stand up school thing I had left. I left right after Todd. That was the definitive turning point in my opinion for me for podcasting, where I was like,

I will be listening to all of these yeah I was I was like. I was hooked at the time. I remember him and stand hope. Had beef and kyle hadn't really spoke out and Jimmy Dore got up on his podcast. I don't know Oh, I don't know how Jimmy gotta monologue assholes like us, but by those fucking bitch oh punch out. What do you do when you're out of your fucking mind, but there was a two parter wasn't a two parter. Isn't it from a drive from Sacramento to l, a listen to the whole thing on a laptop, oh gee, I thought that a fucking rest area to a fucking. I dropped my laptop, so I keep listening to it. It was so fucking good that the air, those are all still those are all still up there. If you're listening and you have never heard that you should go download becoming everything else at kalsi. Is that really still up there? Yet, because how does that work that server? That comes out of my credit card? That's I still pay for that server to stay up. Really. It's like you know it's lips and stuff like that. Month, or something like that. So is that what that is? I don't. I don't really understand much about podcasting. It just stays there as long as it stays there.

which just to stay when you okay, so when you go to like say like bill, burr yeah you bill has and has a like all you downloading all his podcast. No, it stops and he has a brand new place where you can download his podcast. but you're not going to discuss the rss feed switched over because he switched over this First of all, a really change, a saving with fitzsimons did ok, If I don't ever switch out of and you're gonna states will stay, always union, always rather interesting, was you guys. Actually those guys switched was to go to libsyn, really yeah lives in a shit yeah. That sounds great. I'm on libsyn right now, emphatic yeah. I love it. If you don't, Do anything. If you do do you have access to to your nerdist podcasts lives in numbers. Yeah. Well me, hardwick and katie are produced. Are the only three people I know Katie, living and you can actually go in and again look at them One is that it's interesting. It's really money to see.

like the like: the like the Tom hanks spikes, like the number spikes like what you do: an episode Tom hanks episode of Tom hanks, oh wow, and just like cause when you watch that when you look at that graph- and at this point now, there's three- three hundred and thirty years, something like that three forty episodes of nerdist only ocean. How many put out a week three, what DA put a three a week. You do advertising yeah yeah. They do advertising and I say vague because I don't really touch that whatever the hell they were to advertising whatever you should look now pointless. Well, yeah, I mean so someone converging try to figure out how to skip ahead. Three minutes. web aug, like you do. If you do it yeah I mean I do I do I do enjoy by the way how your podcast starts. Thank you. Thank you anyway, that I just in my head, I'm mike

a being desert is I'm up this hour. I'll do this. Business was. If I choose to me, I just I don't ever want to be owned by somebody. Were there like? Listen, you gotta put out too weak. Is this: money's coming in your agents are involved in managers are involved. I don't want to do that, and the other thing is what I'm buying a vodka company. So I'm gonna I'm going to sell my own vodka, I'm looking at you like that, moving to the sheriff here by because what you may not in my past I was sounds so weird to tell someone who doesn't know but, like I was unfamiliar with the rolling stone article. No, I was involved with the russian mafia and I robbed a train when I was a kid. I heard that story so authorities, so so so I'm going to buy the I said that it's it's an interesting sentence like the rest of mine. I yeah, I rubbed it all so so! Well, what do you think of die hard? Five? mother runs the

so I was like I was like I'm going to I'll, just buy a vulgar company and then sell that vodka and it's and I'm going about- it is a little different, but its should. If this goes through, it should be fucking awesome So then also my product. I why why have? Why be the middlemen? If someone else around my product and accept I would love to have as a liquor. Linkage distribution works right. There is a middleman distributors. No, no! No, but I meant I meant like I want to get the profit so like. I don't want to fucking just advertise somebody, so I'm going to so because I'd want I'd, love to have a beer sponsor or liquor sponsor to this, but they just don't know that they don't know that the numbers work. Yet they don't know the instant download downloads. I just don't understand if people listen to it and think too that people are starting to realize, advertisers are starting to realize that when people listen to podcasts, they fucking listen to podcast, but here's here's. I know this is probably a bad business target

I guess but care, I'm cool the way we work on travel. We we make up the majority of our money. I think I'm I'm guessing at last little bit but like on integrations sure yeah you do yet so we definitely do an integration just about every episode and it seamless barely ever notice it does it take away from the show it's kind of cool. I wanna do integration, What aug, I don't mind doing advertisers, but I'm not going to do like stamps are not stamp com, slashed, nvidia, yeah that says this, but, like I don't mind, like. I want to do a state of integration. I will do something if you give me said product it can make sense. In my show, I will do that like if you know, like my buddy John man's made these tincomb system. Arms and then sent them over to me and he was like you know if you want to use these when your show used them- and I said of course I'll always mentioned inconsistent

integration integration, a seamless and the really cool, but like that's how I want to do advertising or progress, because I dont believe that I know for a fact that I listen do more progress than the majority of america. I don't use the products that they have does sure, don't even less than ever been to stand back and I've, never the whatever the one is where you can call your own business and we like legal, zoom, yeah fucking, really like seriously like I like. I don't mean to shit on people's products but, like I don't know where they're getting their numbers from it's not paying often radio, either radio is a dead market when it comes to advertising, no one's us into finance. So these these companies are not lies utilizing their advertising dollars and I'm not saying like looked like fucking bureau garbed advertising photocopiers. This is the wrong podcast do not, but there are products and, I'm sure com, those I'm talking about bull combo right here. It hey, have a combo, be like amazon com as every fucking episode I'll about numbers. You know like

fredo's. That's butter! Fingers like there's shit. You can integrate nor paw gas. It that's why I shall work noticed it like I mean you guys, and I mean like around three guys, replied littered with it, but anything tech, yeah sure And that's you fucking, listen to you, you have you like, give a little. I have a review on it once a week, I'd fucking! Listen to that! That's what I used to do an attack of the show he used to be the guy you're gone yeah, it's gone, got cancelled it in our last episode was december. Twenty first, are you shitting me? That's my it's a good show. It was a great show. That was a really really great show. It was fun too. I worked on it for almost two years: digital olivia month. I work I got there after olivia, so I was there did. They have horror stories about her yeah, really plenty yeah, she's, so fucking awkward, then, when she just stopped showing up like she wouldn't show up for the read throughs and then sometimes there were days. I've heard there were days where they weren't sure if she was

for the show so like you now, Sarah underwood, would have to be ready to host like they did now shut up in the way she left. I think she left leg. I think she leffler formerly ever leaving. It was a weird thing for from what I hear from what I've heard nausea zere say I came and after that everything you here in a project should be hearsay. There should be like upon. As law like it'd, be heard on the podcast? Listen we're just bullshit and are like don't fucking take for the things I've said on the podcast. I'd like and really are we really going to fault? You know they're, rebranding g, four, as the esquire network does you know that's happening. G force gone coming in the summer was supposed to be gone april, twenty something but they looked at the schedule realized. We only have one new showed a premiere. Let's put this off till the summer. Really esquire network like we're like like the magazine that's the idea. It is ridiculous.

Yeah they, the angie for I like to do for the way it was. I had a good time on there. It was a it was, a really Natasha was fun and then what did you do on a target show? I was the I would do gadget prompt. So whenever there was a gadget review, I would come in and do fucking kidding me yeah and then, after the gadget guy. I wasn't all that sucks I I I wasn't role guy there, when I did birth cholera, exactly as I get it, when you do it, but but I would love to get gadgets every week. Did you get free gadgets, yeah yeah yeah, I b subsec a giant tv in my bedroom because of virtue really yeah it was. I mean that part was enjoyable, but it just it just I don't. I didn't love gadgets as much as I should have loved gadgets to be doing that job correctly, like I knew I can process all the stuff, and I know exactly what I'm talking about and tell you. You know what a four k resolution tv is and so on and so forth like that.

No problem. I can read it and understand it and then and then review it yeah, but it just like everyone would ask me, like hey: have you seen the new htc phone? That's coming out, I'm like oh, they do get. I don't care, we used to do we use it to get a coaster enthusiasts would always be like dirt observation, we're. Currently there. Thank god, forty seven minutes perfect. I just always get this panic heart, my life in my heart, where I'm like. What, if I hit a new record coaster enthusiasts, would always come up to me and be like be like what did you think about bizarro, then I'm like oh yeah, it's good, it's great right, right and they're like yeah, but like what? What about that? Third, the conversion. Would you think any version of their it'll be like guys, I don't like I don't I'm not a fucking coaster, guy I'm still regular. Do you just do these is best you can attack away, get them get the information across the audience. What turned out to be We turned out northern realises that through two years A show. Railroad rollercoaster is intended extreme thrills.

an authority on it. Like I know more about rollercoaster than play. Ninety eight, with the population easily and and then all of a sudden you're like holy shit. I remember a dude from a park called me and was like him and I'm thinking about buying his ride. What do you think- and I was like as an I- had a fucking honest opinion I was like- I wouldn't buy it. Well personally, I think if you buy this and it be- and I was like holy shit- I really know my shit about roller posters. You did Can you can you and says you're coming too can make us there's. Nobody may use a high orla, very nice gimme a kiss on the cheek I'll, give you the I love you. I love you. Alright I'll see you guys

you love you someone's not wearing panties. It's me it's me. Did you see that as sneak about their kids yeah, that's she's she's got tactile issues yeah yeah. It's better when we're going through a fucking occupational therapists to get her things. Yeah, it's a fuckin. It's been a it's been an uphill battle for sure. I always thought I didn't want a battle where n is either a downhill battle to get someone to wear pants she's going to be a fucking blast in college yeah, but the thing would like to get like. So yes, you do, Javi, you do the job and then you sort of you're, obviously going to absorb information. You might not realize it. Yeah like I can give you an honest opinion on the brand new iphone as soon as you know, when it comes out I'll, let you know what about it. Now there will be an informed opinion, but I'm not frothing at the mouth for the new I've got. So what are you the most passionate about in life? You know

the I dunno. I don't. I always wonder that thing cause I I I collect guitars route yeah, that's the thing I do, which I probably shouldn't. There's one guitar threat over the t, w a is it in there on it. Oh my god how Listen, that's funny! You! I had a holy shit, a case of a tv way fragile sticker on it, and I looked at it the other day and I was like this airline even exist anymore, holy shit I don't even realize that be wasted courier. There How long have they been gone? They merged with delta lakes right in two thousand and seven say no, I gotta be more now I'll be there. I will know that because the fragile sticker on my guitar came from when I moved when I flew out from Boston to allay god, that's a little more than six

yeah well, what kind of martin b twenty eight I dunno I dunno superb! I know I are you a guitar player. Yeah, it's gone, it's gone, it's never coming back, here's the thing I'm left handed. So that's that's where I collect left handed guitars this sticker the stick her like that. Stick, her just ass darwin. Out of a taxi. Almost Second night ever doing stand up My sister and put all my guitar case, because I brought my guitar to do stand up at the Boston comedy club wow. So at the boston comedy club I did. I was going to do stand up. I did stand up with my guitar and I brought megatron stage and I put it in the back and I tried to first and everyone in the audience stared.

Actually. I talk to my guitar and the whole time that I was going to play the guitar. I could feel it and then, when I did play the guitar I bombed for like six minutes, and then I pulled the guitar out and I killed and I was like I will never take this guitar on stage for the rest of my life. One learn how to do stand up. And so end, but my sister, my cousin, stole that stick on the back of a taxi apollo my thing and I Ambrose them in the east village then so This is here this is my guitar look. How many appointment that doesn't have herring bone is the binding? Yes That is that between india, this was by thirty eight or that's it What does all this mean rate for his guitar? I wanted to eighty bucks or like six, our box, what lessons negative you'd, probably if you want to buy, judy eighteen you're, probably looking at like seventeen hundred bucks shut the fuck up and it plays pretty good when I haven't played the guitar forever. Let's see, if I can do it, torrent forever, I literally used to play the guitar ton, lots of fun mass

they wanted what he called out. It's called income, that's great man. except he's my camera man for triplet. Is it into it and what? What are the odds that in tune? It's a martin there? It's it's! It's high, odd that it's still into it's pretty close to the little flat I used to do nothing Mary. Oh yeah. That's why you know when I would radio you showing me, but I will not be left a it's gonna, be useless. Yeah! That's my that's! My guitar literally lasted through college, where the fuck up with this last college I mean I fucking dropped, drop. That laughs like I could talk to me so much pussy. It's it's a weird thing right. It's like it was like a magic trick. Playing guitar in college is like having an eighteen inch, dick or something it's like yeah its word travels play the guitar in has that's what you want with

is. It is oh that was my fucking. Go to that or brown eyed girl. You gotta remember. I was in college in the nineties. I could play anything. I can play anything nirvana listen, I was. I would just pump out all the dave, matthews songs that would go. You can play dave. Matthews, I've missed that. I really did. I was just like shy. I was just a we. So crazy. We saw him live in a small, small club and delicacy in like ninety four. Ninety five, that's us when he was like, and I'm a bribe rules. I you gotta, like we just column dave, share like yeah, you gotta, you gotta you to dave and man. I remember at my girlfriend was really into them and I didn't like her and I just I I couldn't help but like him, and he did not want to like him right, but he was fucking great. I love him and I still I still do I don't you know, there's a stigma attached to it. Much like smear,

vice. They madison smirnov ice of music. Daniel talking about eighty on your son of eyes devalues asked that cargo shorts. Nobody, if yeah and I still I've hung in there. I've seen that I've seen them in concert. Forty, like forty three times really yeah and I still get like I'm going to the irvine, show in august, really I'm going to go, see them again, yeah. What's he play now? Does he we like to have new albums yeah, it's been, you know they just came with an album. Last year, that was good. I have nine studio albums now shut down he was. He was great. I dunno why you got such a bad rep. You get a bad rap when you sell to people when you sell to, I think I've been to the concerts. They are seeing the people that, like him, That's why you got a bad rap, zealous anybody he put his. That is that I mean like I say this. I say this: knowing the people who should, I wonder about the saying, goes out what happened to deign mean? Oh,

yeah. No, it wasn't. The same. Guy was in austin at the peak of dane cook's powers year, like at the fucking, let's sell at the fleet center three or four nights in a row. You know it was that and I I didn't I didn't get. I didn't get dame, but I knew enough to when I watched him to go he's a fucking raising performer. He my was I was there. I was there. I was in l, a small I've gone raj tits t shirts, the thank everyone for buying teachers. The hum I was here and allay in like I move. I'm start for further cannot tell him. Ninety nine, I want to say when I and I saw him doing clubs and ninety nine, then I will tell you right now. No questions asked the strongest comedian. I've ever seen Instead of my entire life, he owns the fuckin stage. He oh and I was I I when a new york- and I were like people bombed people- obama

and I was I would bomb walked out here and he never bombed. Now he destroyed the second tat. He could go into the worst sat possible like Worst nightmare show ever and destroy the room, and I gotta be answered you. His material was top notch. I loved the shit he was talking about? I was like how come I'm not writing like this. I just felt like I hear it's ironic, that I say this because I'm probably guilty of it too, but I thought it was too referential. I thought that a lot of his stuff was, you know he would run. He would reference something that he knew, that the college kids, had enjoyed from their childhood or something you know like throw that and then they would go. Fuck a lot of people doing that at the time now is like a game with legs, the most proficient in it he was, he was, like he was that fucking that special. That specially has, I believe, it's from the I believe, as from the fleets and are in Boston.

At the t, R. I guess it's the tds that the one in the round yeah yeah yeah like if you watch the fucking special when he's like you, know it's a haman, a stall, every fucking ones that circle a riot people there like it. The people there could not have been more impressed by Jesus Christ lowering himself from from an arena like it's just they. That is like the peak of that is what Steve Martin the cr, like the reactions he was getting is like what steve Martin would get yeah in the seventies like He would do those huge shows. The arena shows a map in ireland. I will, I always give dankert credit for being on a map perform. An amazing stay, I can say, is amazing, stand up and still not totally joy, material craft too. san jose parameters that there's guys that I go there before I go where are they I am not necessarily fan of them, but I can appreciate them like there are people bottle like as a person

that I that I go first to understand, but I didn't Dan was a dane, but I wonder if it's the same, I wonder what that is, because your goal is to appeal to the most amount of people now and then all of a sudden you do and then, because you do, people start disliking you, because you appeal to like like Dave Matthews is the example yeah sure like he was the one who people started, making fun of people that, like Dave, matthews, very talented performer, using performer grit, good person there's nothing wrong with this guy now, but I'll sudden him endanger the examples they use and movies. If they want to say you had no takes yes, like the ida- and I remember seeing someone said in in some fuckin- thing us on tv, its south rogan and the dude Paul, not part, but you know the guy that kind of this innocuous, comedic actor

who is in everything that is not really funny, but he just he's not too aggressive, but he's just like there hasn't he books, in young and now he's still working, I do think of a few names, but I don't want to insult anybody, or do that always. that's the guy he's like fucking everything we ve been forty four and forty. Now of this forty area has authority. This is worrying poor, roger, alright, horrid, like he's like he's not like hilarious, regular use as an actor right, and then he just got into these roles. If you'd, like a writer entities as an actor him and south rogan or doing a m of about how gay they are. Oh, that's, indiana, and for your virgin yeah any, as you know how to tell your guy

as a you have all the to orgasm and in my head, I'm like a seth, rogen and paul rudder fucking, I'm making fun of dane cook. Dane arguably, is like they're like what. What is that like what in my head, I'm like? Why would they do that to him like in my head? Everybody take shock that everybody at some point and there's just happened to be in. It's a fucking thirty five millimeter camera right, it's like, but then all son, it's like, I can't imagine I feel like till I had four. My whole lives is of it on twitter. You know you're, not a movie, but it's like a guy with three followers who tells me I suck in italy, a diet, a sitting in a movie theater. I couldn't. I couldn't begin to grasp that I had a guy. I think a guy call into a radio show and try to stop me about some previous shit, my life and I was diplomats. In every sense of like I was like man, I was inclined to talk that, but I will tell you know it's about guidelines. Were all adults appreciate d love these parts

Thank you very much for listening I'll, try to be as diplomatic as possible and then the guy blew up on twitter and is like a called me, a thief and a hack, and I was like oh my god. I got so upset three followers ray people. That's read that and I was literally like us for I so bad We wanted to reply and correct him because he was wrong. He was just simply wrong, but then I just was like, and that's the thing too, when you look at them- and I bet those three followers were bots. They were just its trolls. I want to start my own folly. Twitter account and just draw people feel good. sure it does just to be like you saw a faggot near like what the fuck I would love thy riddler. I would love to do an end of it but not so much that I have it in me that I want to troll people. I just want to know what they get out of it. I just me I feel what they feel like it just be like what is it? What is it that makes this you're you're

his life's work right now. How long have you been in the public eye? Unlike twitter and stuff? I didn't join twitter until two thousand and nine. I was kind of a late bloomer to twitter. Let us pay when I joined jane during our own eyes I joined and Now I was on a comedy and everything else that time, so we, like and like a co host or just producing it. Why is producing, but I had a microphone so okay know yeah it to the to as much as della bottega talks on stern. That's like I would pop in and will, but you do have todd glass and Todd has never been taught he's, fucking hot, so far He is one of the flight. One of my favorite progress. Listen to cause. It's weird as falk todd is time I have so fortunate to have spent. I bet we did tat. I did like sixty episodes of that of that shown again and every every single time. I will

It would be tears from laughter he's so fuckin funny. I use one that introduced me that guy rory scovel never beth. I never met rory. I met him once I met him once by listen to a montage podcast and I was like the funniest shit roy's amazing. He really is. He is and the the thing I say with titles like the best, the thing that taught my love most about doing. That podcast was our drive because we would drive out to Jimmy doors house in pasadena really, so we would were driftwood carpool every time and just the fucking we were just die laughing we were just there did you did you think he was gay, I'll say this. I wasn't surprise. I wasn't, I wasn't surprise, wasn't surprised devilish prized. You once refuge right, I was I was, as I know it came out of reach of advice came out. I think you know, I think aegis

I mean, like you said he can listen to it. You can listen. Wtf am entitled speak for himself, but, like you know, he I think he'd just he'd, just sort of had enough with it and the the great thing about todd glass is that it doesn't fucking doesn't matter if he's gay or not, and it never came up in our friendship, a ton of very good friends and it never. It was never even a thing that ever even entered either our conversation. It's it's it's! It is the way such rally should We also talk about fucking, my wife. Exactly idle talk about chicks are like that, and I tried time your daughter's pay majority I might be emigrated from it favours for like that's way. Life should be it. It's not your such rallied. My sensual doesn't dictate me and I think what would I think happened sometimes. Is that people in position of, I will say, like what could be considered a minority where they need to fight for the right there. Sometimes while their sexuality or that that thing to define them yet be african american?

rico native american it so they d, be it be it fucking christian right wrath. They let that define them, and I think sometimes at bugs me. Some, like might just be like me, which is horrible sex on a white man who nothing's ever higher neuron organised in my life, but like put the every door. I've ever wanted to has been open for me with the volume I know. Probably it was my struggle could have been a member at augusta, forever, yeah That's right, I'm leaving. I wonder why am I like, we would like, but I just it's like I don't. I don't know my sexuality to find me, and so sometimes, when I see that I go will that tibet that that's all they are as gay like they should be more than that beg us. They are they just fighting for their rights, but that that's thing about tat is tat. Just todd he's just like everyone else. Does that that's

he's. The reason I stop saying I used the f word as a joke about a guy in this package. By don't use, I will refer to things as being gay cut, my u because at time and it's fucking great However, I would like to hear what he said. I statement I stop using the term gay. and like a negative connotations you're, because I've bought us really insightful. Thank you for sharing that with me. You just made a difference, and I will not do that, unlike in That'S- and I think that that's sort of that we're moving the direction. I think it's funny that you brought that scene in four year old virgin yuck, where they're just try insulting each other by call you to the gay and it just even. I think, if you were to watch that, if you were flip the channels and see that on t v now it would not said, the same at a dead man, it's in there that you really does introduce annex. I was like a member sit there go in and the thing the ship shocked me is that they were calling you gay and they like those a bad thing, and I was like it's odd and then these a dane reference be right away. sit? I said the other day we are doing up sort of triplet where we were in the keys and we take.

These are these jet skis two or to have. I feel so stupid saying this. Now we take it to a sam Part of the reason I wanted to do that is my they're. Like where'd, you come up with that idea. I was like I'm going to you're going to you're, how gay I am right now by saw that magic, MIKE an opening when I thought I was like. I really want to do that, but I thought we were saying how gay I was put. It is weird for a guy It's forty years old and married to watch magic mike go like that. There is a question of my sexuality when I'm like, I just watched a movie about a male stripper before I came over here. I watched three episodes of love it or list it. love it or lisbon. I know you're a big fire up out of the way they see their they buffer, the food network obviously don't get me started working with that there are lots of whenever it all day long. What's your goal in this business, I too, I think I want your job. I won't. I

a job like that allowed us to travel through so much fine, just fucking go around so much fun. You have no fucking idea I'll. Do man versus food. Would you sure really pick it up I'll go out new? What about about, like of you, could have if you could take if you could take anyone's job on tv right now, and they just plug you in that person quite safe. While you in audience accepts. You will show shown to be any show. If I'm gonna give you a cause, I want to think about this too, and if I get any job on tv any job on tv fox, everyone, feel free to feel free. I think about we'd us think about sweet both of us. They tell us what they're your dream job would be you know the now. Don't you know what fucking new job I take? Some of the brown should have a job I know. Well, I will general job. We have had one she fuckin. She literally had the job- oh my god, just

that's going on cruises for a year as the one I would take, I'm going on I'm ready oh disneyland for a year like she just she she's to her profile. Definition. Was the luckiest girl the world and she used to say that yeah she has she's the sweetest person checks in every hotel and oh we're going to upgrade you today. Oh yeah, you believe that they're going to I've got a pretty I've got. I feel like in over her role. Travel gentle. These days have, as I already was gone, dream vacations fuckin just every week, star, resorts and literally just have have activities planned from morning to night yeah and it's great, I dunno how the fuck she found time to get pregnant. I don't understand she took time off. I think she took time off the right when I started their strict time off here. I think, to get pregnant and then got pregnant them just like she still had like a deal. There this is still get paid, but she just there was no. Monday, shows of show and now she's like

in between! I think our places of I don't know. I don't know, I don't know what or dealers but but she's a sweetheart. He shows that there are more great hotels out there it. So I wouldn't mind I wouldn't mind I have a pretty good job, but you know I think, that two answers like letterman or like family? I was gonna, say Conan, but I dont want economies do exist and we will have to be in the world I want, I wouldn't mind sure, like during his and he's going to probably take over for whatever effort or whatever the tonight show for yeah now yeah. I don't see that it's you who they told me. There was no take over that the did. The duty does weakened update for I heard the air that it really is

you ready for my money bet go Daniel tosh! I really feel like tosh will walk away when he says he's going to walk away. What you mean cause tosh. Has that countdown on his website to when he retires really yeah, and it's like two years from now, or something like that, and it's just and he's had it up since since before he got touchpoint, oh really, yeah and there's a video there's, a video of me getting hit by a golf cart. I saw that okay yeah. How did that happen? That was on tosh point, oh yeah, and they never paid me for living there, like the only people that have never paid me for that video, but How did that happen by the way? How well we were? We had a golf cart is that the funeral home? Actually, we had a golf cart and there was a mound of dirt behind the funeral home cause. They were excavating to build a new house, and we were just my buddy, who I made. Videos with in college was was down because I was up in visiting msg

it's and he was like. Let's just make a video and I was like well, what you want to do is like well, why don't? We just drive the golf cart around and I was like alright. That sounds fine yeah and then there was the hill and I was like let's try to get over the hill, so we would constantly be trying to get over the hill and at one point it flattened out so much that the golf cart got stuck bottomed out on top of the. Ill, so I'm like well. How are we going to move this thing, so I decided to get on the back of it to rocket for those who haven't seen it. It is pretty fucking. What's even worse than that, video is the it's one. You don't even get if you like a certifiable talent and you don't even get credit- it's just like fat guy falls back. I hit my role, yeah, the one that says the original one that says Matt Meyer golf cart now and has like fourteen thousand views, That is the fact that one has nine hundred million every googled forgot fat people falling of its really is way to So what we say so it's a toss use that what yet tosh use that enables the video breakdown

and are you serious it was the video breakdown. Did he give you credit like, say your name? No, no, no, no, no, no and I ran into one of the writers of of tosh afterwards, and I says I was like that's me and they're like why that's the only way to go anyway, so the but they did the video with my my problem with it was that their video breakdown is when they just they'll rattle off a bunch of one liners yeah, and they were all just you know not great fat, jokes very good golf ponds real. I was just annoyed that now I want to say that I was better than what they came up with fear and if they ever want me on there for web video redemption, where we go destroy golf cart, I'm down yeah, you know cause, you know. Damn Daniel, though I know him. I just know I'm peripherally like I've. I've I've run into him at meltdown and stuff. Like that. He comes, he does the meltdown show on the night sometimes interesting did nay is is an age. I actually saw him at the santa Barbara bowl.

A year ago, really yeah, originally it isn't. The summer says you know like eight months ago, like taking two four months off a year like that is going to be important to the story, but I I saw him and it just it. Just like I was just I was impressed by his entertaining of of the crowd similar to his aid cook way, and it was just after that rape joke thing member. so, we opened it over the radio rape, as I thought it was very funny His is good for him. He's been asking wisdom I guess I just I haven't been in town the book. He's an interesting guy. We went we we went out. We worked one time a long time ago in miami right right. When georgia was born. I worked with him. I tell and Lucy K a feature for all them back to back, to back three weekends

It was a fun cause. I learned more that those three weekends then I learned on the road ever first weekend. I think if you should have a toast for it, it's a fun. She is interesting. During the first week and I worked with the tell I tell my hero in stand up always has been silently I just kind of been the way he works. I appreciate or like his writing. I, like his style, agree that so I want him to say. I'm funny! That's all I want. I just want him to go god great set like that. So I go up and murder like twenty minutes. I'd real tight. My feature set and kill gust ages. Like how are they I was like good, good they're, gonna love. You is a coup,

if the states don't say that I'm like fuck, so we do two shows that thursday night I began, I fucking destroy again. I go tighter, faster, harder, quicker and fucking come off like shaking and he's like he's like how are they said, they're going to love, you dave and he's like good, so he goes on again. Fucking kills so friday early show like this fuckers going to notice me. I was like he's gonna say something like I am not going to. Let him not say how funny I am so I go up again and I rip an asshole into this crowd like same set Titus fire. I know where the laughs are and do and facial fuck I'm killing it. I get off stage in years we get it, you can well how about writing a new joke and I was like, oh my god, my hero, has been watching every one of my sets, and here I am hacking it up trying to destroy and not writing

it's been and I was like ugh and I got in between shows at that friday. I was like I was like man, I I I was just trying to be like funny and he goes you're missing the point of all of this, and that is no one cares if you're funny this is. opportunity to write and grow as a comic wonder you can be a headliner and all these sort of crowds of pressure can be on you. You won't be able to write the way you used to. You should take this opportunity to write and have guys like myself in the back watch you and help you and I went fucking lazio friday. I sucked a dick on stage because I knew one orgy. I wrote everything was brand new. I was like fuck, I'm trying everything then came back with like two tags. For me told me a joke that I told he goes. That's really funny gotta stick with that. I told a joke them our special because he told me that out- and I was like motherfucker worked with louis- the next work. Utah's next week wrote the whole fucking week. I didn't give a shit. Louis wrote the whole week and then I was like

fuck this. If I'm featuring, I am not killing it all. I'm going to write and I got to a place where I can go for the feature and I could write I could. I could improv thirty minutes of brand new material. I could improv for thirty minutes and to this day I think my my stanhope is better. It's like insatiably, better, like just because of that hanging out those three weeks where I was like: oh fuck, so, the goal is to right. It's not to be such a murder, no one. What no comics once had a comics murder accomplish, what is he comics right and be funny it and so, and so we are, that was like the best I buy, but I think back to that we can. I go to my may improve still to this day and I soon agree room, thank god damn it. This is. I was this who just want to fuckin ribbit blow the headliner off stage without you I know who the headliner was only diploma stage. Everyone thought I was fucking hilarious, but the funny part is the next week and I work with tosh and, and it was all black, the whole room was black practically, and I just

fuckin soft shoot it for them. I was like I was like hambone hambone. Have you heard like I was trying to I was trying to. I was really that's my red red grants, choke my buddies. is apparently, as we believe every time we talked about title by because here about so regrets could be on this progress. He's fucking awesome. I love read so here toy count william some time to talk about that But anyway I will toss and I go out and I just ham it up for these fucking by pr dry, I'm trying to get them like me. I got to stage a Tosca. That's one way to do it. I go. I go to tough crowd and he goes well. You just gotta. Do what you do. He walks out his first joke. ike audience, I think Kobe bryant, so good, a basketball. He should be allowed to rape, women. place goes fucking nuts because of our defence attorney. I just put in a hollow real ago. Ladies and gentlemen, the jury, it's one white check ear and they ve

I own them from the second. I was like holy shit, so yeah I yeah. I promise I like tosh, I think he's funny Well, he's yeah he's great at what he does and I think- and I really do think that I think that he'll retire retire. I feel he'll just fucking go live in malibu, so what's your goal of tv show look what you're golden five years from now. Oh five years from now, I want to be a show. Are so rare, really yeah really going to be in the writing side. Yeah. Well, I already the noticed that, the notice BBC america show. I essentially Joanna nice. So what's the premise that is it Your show talk, show it's hard. Mercosur Jonah and I are co host. So we were Andy Richter's. When he's doing alter interviews and stuff like that, and you have celebrities yeah. We have like. Last week we had jon Hamm on the guy with the biggest cock on tv, yeah yeah. Well, I think so right it has to be nothing. I was running a bigger cotton. I d seen this picture of course. Oh god course I didn't,

That is aggressive good for him. Yeah fuck, yeah yeah. I know what you want to be fucking donald draper and have a big dick. Whatever that's fine, exactly fine yeah, that's fine! I just want to see him like do more shit like that, like laird hamilton shit, you know like fucking, big wave the earth and fucking catch tigers. I want him to take him to the next level. I don't need him. It used to be what I want him doing. His hunting fucking elephants. I want them to be the ext man like that. Take the man to the next level, but he's a sensitive dude who loves art and you're like what the fuck you have a big dick. You should be, shooting elephants he's a he, but he is a fucking. I mean that guy can that guy can drink, really can married a fuckin mercedes commercial, that guy he's a pretty, is pretty pimp ass, mother fucker! Is this guy and he's fucking he's great his isa every time I ve every time I ve been encountered, him he's been super cool, super awesome who spoke, wrote in real life. I don't know I smoke useful generates. I smoke fuckin cloves

back to my smyrna literally has dropped. My mike, you spoke. was still smoke cloak seriously. They taste so good. Are you in or are you a wiccan? I picked it up at the cure concert. I don't know where the fuck it came when I was sixteen. I worked at a drugstore and I sold myself cigars. A big cigar guy. I swear to god swear to god when, when we were starting to do this, I said I'm moment go by cigars. And then I was I well know because then I look like too much of what you dont like like the man came I've been because outside there's no way he's us. I was like I in my head, like sky judges, and cigars and me caves and golf and and big day all run in the same fucking category and I was like a beautiful many kids, that, like other microphone by cigars, innovative. Secondly, title I started the gulf team in my high school. You pick off like off.

I like, I am, might play football. I play baseball, shut the fuck up in high school, I'm not like one of these, like nerds, like I also branch yeah data cheerleader in high school. Should I fuckin yeah? I did all they love cigars, likes love. Seen. I've been smoking, a cigar loves guy If we continue with our schwarzenegger when I was fifteen or he's talking about his fuckin monte, cristo those- and I was like that's what I'll do that sounds like a thing really smoke. I still smug monte cristo the day this day. I love the way label. The new that woman, I say new. It's like five years old now by the white label, monochrome there's a big per drone, seven jerry. I will answer two thousand our cigar. Every time I am out of the country, I echo hebrews like in canada really I did not see it has come about about like. Are you a beer or whisky guy? I like

whether an online I like Mcmullen, really, I have always there's always a bottle of mcgowan twelve. On top of my bridge. Ok, all right, keep going yeah. Did you play baseball, catcher no, I was a first baseman really was a lefty one, catcher third baseman left fielder. I got I got recruited to catch because I have I'm looking at me for football and then shot. I would never have gotten tall enough anyway, but a fuck senior see was we have seen a senior year second practice after, second game. I was with retina I wanna play at as blocking me a block I was playing the nose guard know I was playing sri flake center block me. A block. The play was running back, runs b block. I block the a block for that. Either on player, something he ran into and that's why this arm only goes up that far. He ran

to my elbow and fuckin snapped, really just fucking snap and I spent the rest of my senior year in a sling standing on the side, really yes, shots, and so that guide that you're so different than what I'd think so now. So what the valuable my mind so so that cause when I thought nervous, I thought definitely like star wars. As far as star wars them. I, like I like star trek more than I like star wars like I, you know I own all star trek on dvd, like it's. That kind of thing, like really sure I can get down with some star trek, yeah no problem, but I will also sit and fucking yell at Tom Brady on sunday to see. That's the broad strokes, see that's what that's like regular people,

me too yeah, I fucking the second. You leave I'll, be watching game of thrones like a motherfucker sure, I'm obsessed with that. How come you're not you're, not I can. I can't deal with swords and shit. I hate lord of the rings. Oh I'm obsessed with game of thrones. Do they have a game of thrones podcast? Oh I'm sure we can't tell you what my goal is. I was just thinking the other day. I want to do my own comedy podcast network with like, like, like ten jos sure, but I do all of them, so I kind of like Kevin smith already I know- but I do them as characters. So it's like it's like everything you need to know about science, but it's just me doing. Characters of Herg like but like I'm not character, geier, ugly, better Oberlin! I go. Is easy I don't know anything about the guy Roy fuckin millimeter about what

I know about royce global yeah, I hope to god. Rory hears this cause. This is this. This is your footprint rory yeah. He was on Todd's podcast. He was funniest shit. I know for a fact that he's married and he camps all the time, he's always camping, because all his vines are about camping and that he is either on the road or, That's it! That's all. I know about words got like a beard, he owns it, but like we had him, are we able to set unnoticed the BBC chef hold on hold on gas funniest moment on a nervous podcast. Ever it is maybe one of a handful of one's episodes of listen to is that galvanizes Zagat sketch vest nope.

The zach just talking to you guys. Maybe it's just sketches, I dunno I dunno it was at a live show. I don't. I don't like live porno, listen to the podcast zach talking about and he took mushrooms with his brother and they went to the getty. That sounds vaguely familiar. That's that's! That's an earlier episode. They arrived very early yeah. He took mushrooms with his brother and he went to the getty and he thought he thought. The sign said why shouldn't you touch the marble, but it said why you shouldn't go to the marble they were just going through. The stroke in the marble What should you do? The horrible like it sounds like you're right was just touch it. It's called a dog and yes, I lose. I was in like a half in and out sleep and woke up. I woke up and started laughing terribly. I woke up and could not stop laughing. I was like that's the funniest thing. I've ever fucking nerves, yeah, no there's can help blend together

I'm sorry, I cut you off you're, going to say no to the BBC yeah there's music rory at a set and where it comes out and just fucking starts doing, is set in a german accent really does he does the first half is set in a german accent then turns on a dime to a southern accent. Really yeah. I've never seen a stand up. Oh my god, I'm afraid to look Like there's some guys, I'm afraid watch stand up cause. I I liked residing cosette yeah why? What yeah it's like? If, if, if, if, if like their people, that I get attached to on, say twitter or on a on gases that are really entertaining, and there also standards percentage was like, but they came at second or better? Something else may live in some afraid d, like afraid to watch sustainable in the area. Least rory with such a treat to listen to untie glass, prague castle favours worries that lives up to really him on targets. If I go there I introduced enter is one of the very few people, We went out of my way introduced him myself. It you see beehives their flight one night to do. Doug's. Think

and I went you're always go for an event. Yes and he's like. I was like my name's burt had gone a huge fan I think you're hilarious and he was totally cut off he had no idea where I was using you and I like, and I think you thought I was a fan and ass. I am, I had a run of the mill can be. Did you on a more of a fan than I am like. That's the cooling of progress is that when I meet up with people that listen to me and usually those reminded us and, like all reason, timescale in Joe, like Joe ideas. So, like I end up just talking. Bullshitting about things we'll talk, about new Brennan inmost cash or have a pug Escobar's camps, and so the one with riffraff this past week only chasms revives vine- and like your listeners? Podcast- is horrible. What listen and I was like an outside, but then I started. This sounds like mother fucker is a pretty good progress without riffraff view. Just just them is a prevailing good podcast.

I never see this, and so then I'm like fucking, I'm gonna go I downloaded everything I was like all the ones. I want to hear so it's it, but you ultimately are a fan. It's like I'm a monster, I'm a fan. I don't care you. Can you can't not? I think the day that you get into this business and the day you stop being fans of the other people. That are your peers, that you have to reconsider everything you have to continue to absorb. You have to constantly absorb stuff, and you have to you fucking of course, you're going to like some of it. Of course, you're going to have to stay a fan. You, have to keep an open mind to this stuff and you have to stay a fan of it. Otherwise than what the what the fuck go. Fucking walk dogs will, let you do the rolo. I do something as a with noticed yeah yeah in that vacuum like cars way this week. I I well last week. Actually I was looking at my vacation time from work because that the comcast one g, four and then comcast produced the nerd.

it's shell, so I just roll over from g for him to that. So he that work. Are you like an employee yeah like on staff, producer of I was. I was a producer on attacking no and I was on camera for the gadget brown, stuff, yeah and then after Kevin left in august was huge. I heard yeah yeah, I keep. I keep me and I keep getting asked to do it and it's always like on a tuesday night or thursday, some nightmare. I can't anyway after Kevin left. I I hosted you know like fifteen sixteen times after he left cause. We, it was a short window from him, leaving to the end of the show he saw it coming and we'll really we all We all think in our hearts we were like Kevin's last show is our was our last attack of the show. Really he was a really good host is great kevin fucking he's great he's great at live television. He was great at it.

and I got pretty good at it by virtue of being with Kevin and the but yeah. No, I looked at my have. I have not take. I hadn't taken a vacation day in two and a half years. It's called being a up. It's fucking is saying we were like just like every time. I would take time off work. It was just to travel to a gig like is that on a on a friday and go to a fucking, I can't I can't even I can't even express to you how much worse it gets. Oh I'm I'm I'm alive it like I came to tell you what what the future holds now, I can't I'm telling you it and then we had a monday off real, because we didn't we shot straight for which our saturday and sunday to episodes on Saturday

I it on sunday of the Nerdist and then we had a monday off just cause production wise. They couldn't pay us out for fourteen straight days were like yeah, we haven't, we haven't, have a shutdown day, so it was a monday and I got up on that fucking monday morning I was like doing nothing, but when we do doing literally walked into the office really by myself, fucking open up my laptop and started doing stuff cause. I had no clue of what to do with myself when I'm not working well. It also helps to find you it's not like. I know for a fact that a production will will kind of dictate my life like like when, when you get into a production, they become your family, they become your your best friend to drink with, to tell stories. Do it to fuck, sometimes, and- and I know for a fact that when I end a production, I get really depressed cause. I'm like fuck right, like that, was that those were my like it were an hiatus right now for triplet, but I'm like and I'm doing,

I by myself and I'm like god, I miss the shit out of them. I walked in today onset to a new crew, and I was like I was like, and then we we started getting really creative and I was like how is my new family, but I only have them for only have them for, like fifteen days total, but it's clumped out at my two days and I'm home so take a find their work tomorrow, wednesday and then leave thursday, fine ones it. So I are you all know busy tomorrow I got nine to go and sat, and we we work. We shoot until noon and then at noon I gotta do voiceover from. I don't get a lunch noon to one thirty: a divorce overnight, combating we shoot until six than six doing podcast with sure cashmere I love and then and then Evan I leave and I go to a show out it flatterers four times, whereas dog and then I come home. My gloves thomson, whereas what have burbank loves, danziger oh, his is dogged, got his dog got sick or something, and so

we're doing a benefit me him no fucking his dog adopted at the back door. you're exactly reputation operator how beautiful model, Why are they not gorgeous gorgeous? I could do this all fucking night long. Do you have what you have a set tonight? I have nothing tonight really so If you will take turns with my wife yeah, do you have a girlfriend, lorraine yeah? I have a girlfriend really yeah where she lives with me. Her name's kiki, really yep white yeah white as fuck blonde blue eyes, really is. She has shown us, allow interests yeah we do she's, she does she's an actress she. I met her actually at my open mike really there So she does stand up, she's a great ashes and much better accurate. I couldn't aid someone who up like cigarettes,

it does stand up at night and I and I she writes more than she does stand up so she's in like the she's in like the groundlings writing program and and that's cool yeah, so that that that part of it is fine like I go out and perform a lot more than she does, but when she performs she does Plays- and it's like yeah sure go, do that and the sketches and stuff like that that she does she writes, gets she's. Writing sketches all the time because she's in this class that was groundlings class, it's really hard to get into or whatever, and I just when she sits down to write a sketch. She fucking sits down that the two write, a sketch like she'll, sit down and actually do it really is. I will sit down check, read it for fucking three and a half hour which read it read. It is an aggregate, it's sort of yeah it's sort of the internet condensed into one page, so you like it may have different sub categories of things you're into or whatever so like. For instance, I'm into like I go to reddit dot, r, slash guitar.

and you know I need a very refined everything online about guitar or whatever they think is cool they'll post it on reddit and it's and it's just like it's a nice place defines really yeah. I see about read it all the time, but I never really knew what it was yeah. Well, if you ever go on reddit you'll lose hours. It's like the same thing when you when, when I was would like- and I think I know what this is now but you'd, see rss yet like when I was No, that was banal, unknown rss feed is so now I think it's the same thing right. Well, it isn't because its catered. It's me like its more user generated, rss feeds you subscribe to something and then its constantly updated. Whereas ready thing is like somebody post something like a photo.

Where meme or whatever I don't even know what a meme is. A meme is like a. How do I explain a meme and it's a took a picture ever seem like a lolcat like a you ever see like a picture of a cat that says I can has cheezburger or something like that. That's very I can has it's lol speak. It's a whole other internet genre. Don't worry about it I can has cheeseburgers, has Jeez we're we're here to show you a meme right now. I love this cause. It's these things that I'm too scared to ask people they got oh, what a meme is, but I hear about. Oh, that's a great meme right like call me. I swear to god where, I call it means- and I was so to me later- member jif, you know like it really did per correctly pronounced gift, but I forgot to give the go ahead. I have a mac faulkner from the child on here. And he knew more about the internet than I've ever have sat down is a is a kid and he was like either you couldn't bring up any that he hadn't seen on the internet? That's that's! That's those guys! The chive literally.

Everything there is about the internet so like so. This is a gordon ramsay mean what's going on right now, so essentially the picture but their own text. So you click on mass. Also, ok, ok, so it will be like that that's the main there's the beef is so undercoat its eating fucking, salad and then there's I said her ass, his people generally. This here at least hitler could use a fucking us like holy shit visa? The me? That's it mean, and people just generate like funny things. I think that would fit this picture and that's the bar. That's a mean yeah oh my god, I'm so that's there! That's of and that's oliver and read it is like really here. Red is the place. interesting, so who's, the biggest nerd out of the nerdist you genre or artist, Eric really yeah really yeah is he? Is he hard to deal with like just as he like,

so, focus now very sober. We see replace booze with work, absolute really and replace booze, I think I've got a sober up. I got a sober up just so that I can just fuckin make a million dollars back. I focuses like nobody's business, really works and works of work, and if he does not, you know it's always funny lad. He over the holidays? He went for like a road represent like that and it just always in when he attempts to take a vacation. Could he really gets into the same thing that I did that day that I had off, but it's like amplified with him or he needs to be. He needs to costly, be working. And that that back as work ethic, I admire the So I wish I had that out rather fuckin. She lacks like out rather fucking take naps all day, and if you, even if you, even if I building time for relaxing. I don't know that I can do it, I'm going on a vacation vacation in may, where you're going going to disneyworld cause I'm going to knockout, seeing my folks and I'm going to be on in a place where I don't ever have to drive, so I can drink coffee.

Really because you can just take a bus to going to orlando for the whole whole time, yeah yeah, I'm gonna fuckin, do another lando, my gonna if the studios are trying to think I'm trying to think what I know to do in orlando when you're there, like your island's gone, really yeah no longer exists, oh that sucks governor nice burner for the day, what new smyrna and what is that, where it's a beach, it's beautiful. What orlando isn't florida, nothing but far drawn new sport is thirty minutes with miranda was cut forty five minutes of attacks, but no cocoa beaches waiting all new sport as a straight shot, it's like like dictate owner it's just below eternal, but it's not daytona. You'd only Donna you wanna go to this smyrna new smyrna is a little more user friendly like you go. You can dry when I used to go, you could drive on the beach, so you just pull up on a beach and then park. Your car on the beach always wanted a sand permit. For my jeep, like I had a, I always had wranglers yeah and there you could get a sand permit for cape cod.

I never did it for some reason. I never did it. Oh, you can drive around on the beach in this morning and it's the number one shark attack place in the world that low rum great. I love it really. This works of art. I have time the little sharks But it is gorgeous in Anna maria approach What else you could do in orlando there's right around there. All you've got to medieval times. Yes, a medieval times, rolando talking the reticence, whereas we again do you really, which is of ivory. We're in a row. I go if Tom Lenin, in his wife and kid airum three years in a row, we ve gone really and its now. It's getting hold on. the thought, showman tomlinson appeal has shown that I think it I'm Lenin's kid. That's kiddos units I'm sorry old. They set off forgot tommo, enshrined at eight. I know looted on lessons from this day, so gay, but king literally

almost lost my shit about. You think that we should let it and wish I did. I wish they had daddy seems like an asshole I know about it so easy to get. Your problem is a little bit and I dont know how great you can be better yeah we go every year and but but what I noticed this last year was a little bit this year. It's like really fucking hipster it out. Really a lot of fucking ironic joining of a to show that the iwai called moat, crashers listening born already, so every man has a castle and every castle neither the moat goaded loads were like. Looking to build a moat like nolan, If you want one I knob go, you won't buy one burger and fuck it. Let's do a moat. I can believe why they passed on that is fucking awesome every

if we just take boats to the next level. About it. Right, ok, get a designer like a designer who really knows like fuckin out your outdoor design. I haven't build just a bad ass, fuckin mowers. I thought you were going to say it was going to be get a designer who knows medieval defense. Yeah though no but think about how Think about just forget it I'm sure, when their done, what the moat it'll be gorgeous mo crushers every house as a moat these at no one has moat everyone, everyone's credible, every episode, the middle of it, will be about the plumbing problem. We can't do this mode bird with you The house loses hot water. The best to find a way around at the best part, is the maybe the wife doesn't even and this she goes. Oh, what the fuck is this and it's husband cobbler. I think it is a great line of offence, though

it will break into your hospital. Can't I I would. I would throw my house up as the first moat crashed I'd put a motor in my house. I feel like you would run a dish. So much from like zoning committees as they would have to be They ve got to be illegal. I should like you can actually it's in here. We had them Are in seventeen hundred. You can't get motor are so dangerous. I mean you get books especially filled with crocodiles, yeah yeah like but like imagine, If you did like right, the perimeter of my house right. She literally Up to the house, you write to the foundation, obviously a knob burbage right when you go to my poor, it sets the drawbridge fucking also love it they passed. I would love it, of course, that it, I thought a really What I really thought I was thinking out, you I say said: I pick some pretty horrible shows. blind design, I'm listening, a blind Designs are, but though it be

before you. Also, there is a blind designer. I want all right it is that there is better, is bathrooms every every rule? We want to know whether a terrible brown look bad pool resources. Ten through the terrible with no better. It would be better if you have a tv you line of toilets www. Google pits those sit up is a show once I'm. That literally, I think is greatest show in the world and no one would do it known, would touch it with a ten football black verses. Wipe, I learned that the race war begin of care of me

and warren sap find out who superior races every week to contest okay, we go when we find something out of culture like say, churches or or or radio stations or debt or music or food, and we find we only explore both cultures was by other cultures. Asian pan, american, whatever we explore everything and then at the fourth act, we compete and of what we ve learned and he could be further by people who can be for the wife. bull and whoever wins the contest based on everyone, we'd better. Judge asked sure that's a possibility raised within that war. To me and he was like goes egos because I'll do it, but no one's gonna fuckin do that. let's go to travel to another like that, where that seems a little problematic, but it's fucking it's something. When I talk about an interesting, it's something you talk about, re superiority, who's talking

but no did not respect already. Obviously s tongue in cheek, like like the whole race purity, is a joke, but but what what What are you talking about? Who has the best food italian food? But yeah it's it's basically exploring like go to churches. Who's got the best churches by people, white people, white people asian- raising churches? You us some mexican churches right now and then and then a bit at that? am I in my head in this way. My brain thinks- and maybe this is too idealistic, but I'm like it's a great way to bring people together, because it's like you know, say you don't really talk too much to the guy asian guy. In your work. You go avian race wars or by verses. Why and he's like your church on earth or black eye, literally put that everyone's resource parent theoretical black races. Why that's the idle yeah? That's that

you ready for that. This is the home run, and this was a serious pitch. I took to Sharon levy at spike. Can I kidnap your child? I said no apparent, I'm going to try to kidnap your child gay. If I can get your child, that's the goal, you can't do anything different. I just gotta try to get Zhao yeah. So then the show starts. I have a van have a crew and I try to get the kid in the van. If I can get the kid in the van, He goes to the grandparents that we send them disney world for the weekend have a great time, but that's when the show really starts, because now they've got to negotiate the safe release of their child, so they've got to acquire the ransom money. They've got to do the drop right. Do they want include the police? Do they not? Wanna include the beast police and if they can do the drop off correctly, they keep the money. If not, I q money together kid back, but I gotta get back anyway past despite passed on. That is both their will. We didn't get out of the box. What ideas do you have, and I pitched asks- and I pitched a pitch like a sporting, a sports show. These are the

run. Deadliest worry, unwatched, deadliest warrior knows it's their show where they make with using science and like myth, busters type lake, ballistic, dummies and stuff, like that, they see who would win a samurai or a world war. Two soldier, like I, make the put up like the weapons that they would have had and everything like that. So on christmas, I'm flipping the channels, and I see spikes running a marathon deadly. Warrior, turned it on and it took a screenshot of at night and I and I sent it to twitter cause it was. It was pol pot. Very Hitler users of how can name sirens lab the fuck are they doing and they just like it was insanely washington's like ok, so pol pot, jane. They use a lot of guerrilla warfare survey legs suddenly it was it was. I was see. I would like to see our genuine. Let's see, animals fight like a bare file, a lion

like a big it did. I shall I be into that. Aren't really pretty good. Just watch like a david amber about documentary about no, I want him in the cage and I want them baited like meat around the necks like I would like, and I know that that is a step above what Michael Vick did but, like, I think, is pie fare of it. It's a step above or below a step below I'm sorry a step above it's like a little more polluting than what my pitbull. Oh, I just realized. I said that sounds horrible, but it is a step above because you did not incorporate rape stance, yeah, I've, I've. I take that statement back. I don't want to see animals, but, oh god,

god I'm laughing too hard. I I just love the the let's go back to the moat thing: moat, crashers, moat, crashers, the disneyland disneyland has a moat and a drawbridge that works. It's only been used twice what, if we just it's like what, if we, okay, let's let's ballpark a tv, show right now, alright, alright, what if you want channel or a pgr, why it's my favorite diy wise one of the best channels out there and I think they'd buy it. So here's a show I wanted to do. Okay, I wanna do a show about guitar is called, let's get guitar to get target This is the best politically uncorrected game. I've ever heard of my life. Let's get started where I have to go to I go to a factory, I go to the talk factory, they show me through the process yeah and they let me make a guitar with whatever limited skills

haven't would like homer, cumbersome somebody made a car right we have to then it's obviously We pretty guitar to then getting started, but then like we go, we have to lake, deliver the guitar to a to a vendor and they're there that they have to sell it. Like that's the thing, but I have to. I have to sell this guitar to someone. So someone wants a les Paul, I'm like I'm like yeah, you could I mean you can go with this les Paul custom over here or this handmade, this les Paul, which would probably I don't know what it would look like better his guitar, I can tell you I can not paint anything So yeah I see what you're saying so, let's get retarded and if and if they, if I do, if I sell it, then then then the the person that that that would have bought the guitar gets a five thousand dollar credit to buy whatever like gibson guitar. He want there were there, ok, well yeah, as every show just one just doing that.

I don't know anymore. Ok recruits floats, let's get, let's get fluted escaped retorted Let's get trombone trombone the fuck. Would I I would like to see a show here's one looking for I'm for and a title like that, because the title like that, it's like the jewish hammer this is a movie that I've heard on for five times, I don't want to see this yet but by then, but the title who makes you want the title makes me want to see it. Yet I like I'm, trying to think of like deadliest catch, was like a good title. These guys have a great time I saw you need us going. Titles was down in a wars. What I mean now wars. So, like cupcake storage, wars, beard wars like there's someone fucking barbara, by a race or race wars.

Is that why you come back to it is going to go on. Tell you mean wars that I got him in he's in the I would like I want I want do a show. I was thinking about the other day. I was like why don't we do show where it's like? Just you do the shit that you have the show based on stuff you ve, never seen on tv, like sorts exe, If you ve never seen on tv, so if it any I can go on t v. Anything can go on as long as no one's ever seen it on tv. Well so, like I dunno, that's like a stoned thought but like like so many times. You turn on things you're, like I've already seen that of seeing people do that three or four times like what is it you're show just a snuff film put the fever. Seen anyone get murdered for real Its were very sure ways way from their own. Oh shit, I mean shit, no shit yeah, I'm was interviewed the boston bomb

then, and they just playing over an over that all guy taken a like money. He had set the planet, in Oregon and I'm like guys were just watching someone get hurt like in you're playing it over and over again. You know, I want to see it again, yup and you it's like the the news to do better than that. It's like when I, can kid broke his leg in the n c double a tournament and they just played it on to that oh that I know who you're talking about yup yup yup, yup yup, I the first one of that Joe Theismann, oh sure when he snapped his leg and and all my god I remember coming school about that can be seen. That was at what, and there yeah. You gotta and I remember coming home, be like I'm watching all of news until they shows up yeah, oh weird thing that people are just so fat. I mean I'm fascinated by too it's just like, but there's some stuff that you want to stay like. I never watched the Kevin ware thing cause. I knew what it was, and I was like I'm okay, yeah seeing some of the bone. It's curiosity gets the best of you. I was in a hotel one time in sacramento and the people next to me. Section and there were like the girl was very

go and guidance. A word like shoes, I might have been me, are you and I'm sorry that you're exactly so yeah very sad when I do like the red october, I'm ready for silent running What do you make noise when you an orgasm? feel differently. I suppose. I am the exact same way, my wife, as I stared like about the dentist yeah like looking at me. Reflection or glasses, I don't make a noise. I think it's because I don't think I think I know this is mark. Cronin was one that told me this because he's so good at masturbating, yup yup, it's masturbating! It's all its were we he couldn't make noises as a kid. At twelve years old you can sit the bathroom be like, oh god, this feels good, because then I remember that girl he's jerking off in there, so you had to

be silent and quick and that carried over to my sex life. But what I'm saying is the in the room. Next to me, there was the girl was very vocal, very vocal and she was like- and I could tell she was by the way she was always off and is poised to get on that, and he wouldn't say a word and I was like. Is she doing this by herself like I sat by the door a connecting door and listened, and I was like holy shit, so during the weekend. Like I'm just hanging out there and one day I hear them getting ready to leave and I hear the door open. Believe yes, and so my I will see what they look like. So I open the door and its, and I see the black check she standing in the hallway waiting for him to come out and I see you're gonna go yes that is deftly who I heard and then comes out a skinny. Why do not? I didn't could now, but I went that makes sense out loud shouts and then

and then I was like oh shit. I just said that and then I walked back in, but I was like that totally makes sense like either skinny white guy he's just fucking, silent and she's. Just oh fuck is buddy. I dunno, if that's what you're saying, but what's the name of that type of that genre of porn, cuckold god what a plate I was. The first tv role ever booked out of an audition was played a coupled on the shield feeling a poetical called. I I was I was. I was a mock d, w p employee who, like to watch big black man fuck his wife. Yeah I've thought that as a genre for an artist the way this is a good story go so I go to do it and let me get a beer hold on a second I'm fucking. We, we should probably wrap this up soon, but I'm having such a fucking different. I'm talking to you so so I go to do the scene. I'm sick of flying

new york. That day, I think I just moved in with my wife. She was a blue moon, yep, a real dream, my two favorite beers, yeah good job and you've got a sam Now. If I can put him, if I had all, I know I love them, so I go to the set em sick. I just wondered from new york. I was formed at the motel son of SAM connecticut, for And- and I got- and it was like. The big blizzard was the big blizzard on the northeast in, like I want to say, like two thousand the rear, two thousand for do. You know that three, it was a hurry yeah. It was a big blizzard of same weekend. I flew to, I flew to l a to do the shield side booked it, and so I get here, I'm sick. I come in and I'd read the partners I get. It saw happening. Is date I'm sitting there being a window. The cops pull up in their time or someone else, but they spot me peeking in the window and then they me palmiest,

I'd like a day and I try to run and they grab me in the may cause me to take me the front and then they asked I know this guy and the girl goes he's my husband with a big black eyes like yeah and they're like what and it was awkward as the coupled. So they pull up in the scene and I'm playing with my dick, like that's what I thought that character would be doing and the girl cop says cut she gets cut ago. Whoa hold on she like what she was he's playing with himself to Michael chiklis and the director are both there.

He's playing with him he's touching himself. This is disgusting. Are you serious? Is this really what I have to work with she's a cunt she's, a fucking straight up cunt and I'm like I'm like a humiliated because I'm like did I read this part wrong? Like I thought I was a peeping tom like I thought I was playing right arm and I was like I'm just humiliated and I'm sick. Then she is exploding on me. They take her away and Michael chiklis like, and the director get right up in my face, and I'm like yours, where I lose my part and Michael Douglas goes great choice. I like it strong. I like it we're going to shoot some more of you playing with yourself we're going to hold her in position a we're going to put you here, just play with little bit, do it we're going you like sims snap ends and cut like getting shot you and then and then, when we bring her back, don't do it, but we're going

is you doing it and I went out nice. So it was alright action, and so I just fucking go at it as I play with my dick hard to the point: restaurant actually an art, I'm like I'm like fuck, for like three minutes. Four minutes. Is a very long time to do that, and I think I want one of my card even videotaping illness. Or did you see him the ability to, unlike let's see how I played my dick for so fuckin long and then find here caught em. I thank god. I was at an orgasm and then she came back the second time and I didn't do it and then I dunno, if it made it in the show, I don't think I've ever seen that episode actually, but she cuffs me and then takes me to the front and that's the scene. that's great slayers by one people like us, all that cracking eyes zeppelins from wall Massachusetts really, which is where I am from, his nephew was best friends with my brother really and I bowled with him. While he was on the commission, he took us bowling seriously. Yeah! Really What was he like? He was a cool guy. When I met a cool guy, then too yeah he was really nice commish. I remember him saying

I remember I said something about me and my wife is pregnant, maybe whoa. What are you going to have, and I was like a girl like that and he laughed and girl. That was shooting there is like seriously, and I got fuck was a joke. you, don't want to look that up now. Just to see I wish she was sure we can find out annex the internet movie database yeah. I am to be covered on that one. If I had a nickel for every time I started movie and I was like who the fuck is. This find out what oh, I know that mother fucker that's Kevin's soul, what anything else you want our up will allow. Don't worry about your flip, but well while our while we're here sure. So the premise of the show correct me if I'm wrong here now, here's here's the thing. I've never seen a shovel. If see me advertises war it, while I'm watching hotel impossible.

Oh anthony milk. Every day, as long as you're on the channel, that's all the math. That's all we care about is the premise of the program that you people are already going on trips and you flip it on them and you then make it their dream vacation or is it you find random people and say hey if you can leave right now, you're going on vacation season, one was we for the first half of season season, one we found people in the locations and flip their trip. No problem was that problematic, because we then had to make sure that every thing we did was a in times better than anything they even had planned. So so we we would find ourselves doing things that were also for tv Maybe they didn't want to do, and then we were kind of fucking up their vacation somewhere, like will falk like, and then it turned into like. We had to outdo have someone like that stupid and it was really hard to find couples on big it like on vacation it. It was its streaming,

are really extra. I can't tell you how hard it was. It was extremely hard so then weise. I said I said to someone: why don't we just do it like when we just get them and take them on vacation, because that's a lot easier and they were like and then at the network was like. Let's do that, then for the second half of season. One we just went and we went to like. I think we went to l a in vegas, maybe a couple of places and we went and found people and took them on vacation yeah and that worked extremely better like it was. It was so much easier to europe. Giving a vacation is on one. Here's my question, and that is how are people able just go our people able just go on vague, it's well in canada and also to some press. This is a mental problems, anus its television production. So there were, there are trips. There are trip, so we ve taken words that that night, there's deftly one that we did in vegas. Were we

we're leaving that night and then a wedding to go to and they build on the wedding and left her. Thus that was a fuckin, pretty amazing one. then usually like anything international is like a week out, sometimes like two weeks out yeah. So we tell them the day a passport to whether it will I I I sift through all that when a crash the location I go diva passport are you're could be certified. I like adventure. I mean the interview I do with people so that when we, when we go to action episode like what we find travellers. I I ice sift, what see on t v is, is none of what I actually do and what I do ultimately, as I find out, I know we have like have like nine to fucking second producer, already that what no no, no, I do all of it. I do all of it because, because you're there it's it's, I was very married to the fact that it needs to be real. Yeah like I was like. I don't want to cast people and just send them to there. I want it to be real.

these people? I don't want to say to my fucking fans. Listen, I'm looking for travelers and then know that we've casted them or I want people to believe which also sucks dick, because then I have fans coming out there like. I really. I would love to go on vacation with you and I we end up not taking them. Yes, but we don't take them for some odd reason and then you can see you can hear them in the tweet like bert. Please, please, please help me and am I like I really wish I could, but we know it's it's that when we know we're taking that year and we know what we have and we and basically but we're looking for people working for the right people for the right trips ran. So, like my my crap, is often like this like I'll. Do it right now go I'll go so, and then- and this is where we- where would you be places to travel into the: u s and economy. Kind of you ass. I would love to take a trip to seattle. Ok, we're like, if you name five top, I places you want to go. I wanna go to seattle. I wanna go to cape cod. I want to go to

lake Michigan? I wanna go to montana guy and I wanna go to texas perfect. Now no, my head as far as me that we have seattle and taxes are less, ok, so now my head, I'm like are we for now for those two trips, we have bull riding in taxes and we have the space needles and salmon, throwing in in in seattle, we have seen We have a lot of seafood, it thought so. My aunt, I start now trying to figure out those are the two scenario: do consumers of yourself share of core like how adventurous put a face well, I mean I would be on zip lines if the weight limit held okay. But what would you do you like? Barbecue love, bbq, if you'd like, would you ride a bull? Oh man, I would love to ride. Oh ok perfectly I what will come. You can do. Tough I've been sum it up. They matthews back, ok, visa origins, ok, ok and shooter agenda. Now I was now now I've assess data that that you like good,

second, you, like music played by musicians. So am I had I go now? I know we got the courtyard hounds which of the two sisters in the dixie checks. So no more I'm already like. Alright. This is a good one for austin right, you'd be perfect for us and you'd get on a bowl. We could take you'd, really appreciate the music you love bbq, so you're imran for austin and now have you're chicks, intimate unlike bam. So we had done. It was awesome and I talked to my producers and and they're like what do you think in austin like fucking austin, and that's all goes? Oh, that's, and so so you kind of like. It's like you know what trips you're looking for, and you know what people you're looking for, and you know you need them like when we are going to australia. First thing are asked for all those trips or do you have a passport and everyone's like yeah and like, and it's it's ready to go you see the might apply. I again are you sure scooby certified and there like yeah and then I remember one girl was like I am, but he's not, but he gets get certified. So, like you, you know what you're looking for and you just trend of

The perfect people for the perfect trip, vault amazing, you're, running into people that are saying. Yes, there are schools that you'd be shocked. A lot of people scuba certified and here's the other crazy part about that about this show is that we have. Also realised in taking this and making season two that a show is better if we customize the trip for them a tad bit. So we have like three things that we know we're going to do and then we find out, what they're into and we make sure we do stuff that they really love, because that makes for better show to its real. You know it's a process of may of, interesting process making their show, because I I m pot committed to making sure it's off into the guy. I want it to be as real as possible. That's good, but the abbot this, but it makes it really. It's really are to do. We will be so much easier for just bullshit where designer, like an ipod, iphone upon stars.

Rolling people were like he's going to have a sword? You're, like wow, looks like you have a sword on your end, I'm going to say that's fifty five dollars I'll, give you a fifty seven, okay or like fuckin or like the storage wars, that such bullshit loves. Third wars doors. wars is such. Let me tell you a fucking makes me, I, Right now, because now now this is someone who the to the best of my ability, I've tried to keep my show as honest in every way, fact every reveal we do for an activity. I don't want them know about it until we roll up. I want to. I want real reactions. I don't let our crews take like four or five retakes of a of a reveal. It's that that is what it is, is fucking the. The restaurant show where they come, and they goes your restaurants got problems

we regularly vasile occasion, nightmares one of the two I forget which one it is. But here's a drives me nuts. They set up hidden cameras, I'll fucking. Are you talking about fucking you're, either talking about mystery diners, which is such bullshit? talking about restaurant stake out. Restaurants take out which is also bullshit, but not as bullshit with their boat. Because they set up hidden cameras. Yet everyone, clean audio, what alpha This clean audio, edward signs releases yeah, who the fuck that makes me so It is a glaring at all my sound, I go. How are they king, this fucking bar. How is it that these people's audio solving our rescue to harmonise our youth involving shitting me you, Guys sound like big drug problems in their sleeping with people and they sign of fuckin release. You would never Let us show that fucking bullshit, it's insane. It's insane the fucking restaurant risks.

Bigger referencing. It's bad, but if you get a chance, it's coming back, I think next week, just fucking dvr one episode of mystery diners. Really, and you will lose your shit like to watch it just to get mad about it. Cause there are people there's some fucking. The some of the worst acting I've ever seen on tv happens on makes me fucking crazy cause. I'm like look. I know the ins and outs of production like I know how this works. that's not real that you put you in the hope that you will never find a couple of three really attractive people. One guy two girls sit at a bar, and then wonder out loud, whereas the bartender? How can the barton is not here? We ve been over fifteen minutes the wee bit here and then clean audio on that and I'm like, and they also releases. Makes me fucking insane.

I I get, and I get into that too, and I sit there and I watch tv shows- and I know, even though I know, even though I know how production with succes like. Like the last episode like the vegas episode, we did and I'm telling you all my children- this was the realest television's ever been is an were down at like sixty six sixteenth street mall, looking for travelers in denver, and I tweet, I am standing on the corner of this and this anyone want a free vacation. Come find me there's a couple kim and kyle that are three blocks away. They read my tweet cars are fans of my podcast defense joe's bobcat, and they read my tweet. They literally get on I fucking bike and drive up and it was so perfect. She's on the back of the bike. Keys in the front is like we want to go on vacation, they drive up, it looks so fucking staged. I can't even tell you like: if you see it, you go that Well. She even me- and I remember I even save the camera. This looks too good to be true like I was caught like this is fucking impossible,

but that's how that works is. Are you some sweden they common fucking to keep something real and it's not, as a potential rate could take my daughter's comment without panties on real you know, Pakistan is the is the right now. Podcasting, I think, is the purest art form yeah that that, at least in our includes appears choice of to use our voices apps. I think absolutely I a hundred percent agreed and you're on the big progress in the world. Just partners is number one. Rina, Jos, yeah, really governor. I wonder what I am your number thirty to sum up: I'm not getting a serious limited area really here Well yeah? Alright, I feel fucking good you're doing all that, while you're here you didn't know that I dunno. What does he do after he agreed after I'd agreed to do it I was, I said: I should listen to your pocket Oh really. Well then I went I went in and I look at the less than as I was like

if scrolling, because I was like he's gotta be in the top one hundred, so I scrolled shut the fuck yeah. I wonder if I could list the top thirty two, can't because what happens is the algorithm itunes uses some factors in nuisance. drivers have a brand new podcast drops and immediately will fucking skyrocket. You know so that's the thing it'll be aware of, but like people like rogan Allah, rogan crawler marin, as in what happens thing with the thing with corolla. Is he aggregates? He gets to aggregate five out of five fucking episodes a week so that aggregates into his overall numbers for the item girl? So he does. What do you mean? He does five episodes a week, what He doesn't like array, he treats it like a fucking racially divided more episodes a week. Would I get better numbers? Yeah you'd get up. You jump up a bit then onto to a week due to phuket, do to if you're going to play this week, then alright, fine, I'm gonna, be shit. Fucking, lock and load this bit and then, when you need me again I'll swing up

seriously, yeah, I fucking had a great time and it's been fun bird. I think that we did this. I'm really glad we did. As you are you're a guy I've seen I've seen on tv and I've gone. I you know I I enjoy that guy- that guy, like that guy until he's on his way to you or if you had a man, can and this was candle, was excited. He's gonna want the ten. Has my men give rate. I I, like the look of your man, gave a lot and I will say it's mostly because of just the just the way is designed. It's not like. There's a here's, the funniest thing in the world to me: there's a theirs of wikipedia article four stripper poles. Ok, so you go to the wikipedia article. Four strata know how the fuck I found it one day, but anyway, clicked on Wikipedia first river evolve and you know what you're feeling has a picture. Sometimes you clicked on the picture and it was in the picture of the stripper pull. It was everything you would imagine

getting laid about the house in a house that would have a stripper pole yeah. So there's like there's like a a goodfellas poster. That's not hung up on the wall yeah! It's there's like duct tape somewhere. It's like all these little things that, like the pictures huge, so you can, but it's the funniest fucking picture in the world, really everything you imagine when you think someone who has a stripper pole in their house yeah. This is what they like everything like that is in here now. Coming to your mind, when you think man cave, you think yeah, maybe the man cave has a stripper pole. Maybe it's that kind of a situation. But when you get here, I will say this: your man cave is very classy. Classy smells good tonight didn't finish garage, but anyway it's for that opens into the backyard with papers. You haven't even seen the outdoor shower, what your outdoor shower for what for me, showering outside can be a fucking monster. What you love showering outside its I will shower tonight as america. As we're sitting, you're talking or think ceremonies outside tonight.

if you were telling me that I was like oyedepo in you are outside tonight, so fucking best, it's like you're getting out of a public pool amid the going to look in the universe Our doors I mean I haven't even cabin oh? No! No I'm talking like professionally showered outdoors, no nobler, whenever Samantha out of jail? we shall address hours, bio waste may read excellent body undermine the ram maisie it's fuckin, as it has had twins good, reuse of gorgeous she's gorgeous and she's coolly shit and acts. Always that's it. Like about her being under our feet, up a narrow you I need to further. I just want to state arab. I love you I enjoy arrive one week. I got through

Sixty two episodes. I've seen every episode that were on netflix, yes, and it was great and I loved it, and I and I enjoy you quite a bit. I picked up your book, america, the edible yeah, but here's the deal, all I'm saying is go up a size jacket. That's all I'm saying is literally olives atom. I think you look beautiful. I think you have nothing to tell you that's great. He looked great looks so much better. In a jacket one size up one size up. I about that an attack of the show they put me in stuff that doesn't quite fit, and I'm like I'm not. I can't do this. I can't I'll tell you what I'm going to I'm going to say this an atoms bath. I know for a fact he took over his wardrobe duties are good. Started. I think I think he does does all his dressing now he's very into fashion, oddly enough What did the first through episodes? We shall pursue episodes you definitely get or pursue seasons. You deftly get note from the network of what you want to do. I look like a little bit.

so I'm sure he didn't have much to say on that, but he definitely has taken over his wardrobe. I mean. Have you taken over your wardrobe Adam hear me up. One says I suppose size we gotta get him and noticed. I will I've I've. Why wanted Adam? I noticed a mac I said that you'd be great with you guys. It sounds to Harwich. I was like I want to get him on the podcast he's like. Oh you think. So it's like yeah it'd be good. Like always happens with Chris. We that means sure, and then we just completely it just goes the wayside for some reason. I'll set you up without him, so you guys can have him on he's afraid, it'd be a great guy smart, as fucking shit yeah. He went to like yale yeah. He had one of those he's one of those fuckin yeah Alright, I'm going to go, have sex with my wife enjoy What are you doing to promote? It's the nervous on BBC america, ten p m on saturdays I say that download. If you ve, never listened to it, try it out. That's it! I'm unemployed with this up next week, great

I'm gonna do to you and curious sultan. A bit younger. I dunno care of harsh fucking amazing arrived. He rode warrior hey. I really appreciate coming over Thank you. This absolutely is brought to you by the machine.