I sit down with comedian and Howard Stern alum, Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling. We talk about being friends with Rodney Dangerfield, his time on Howard Stern, his favorite jokes, meeting Mark Cuban and much more!
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Is generally jamieson standing at the buffeted, nor with an open, bathrobe web
he's just stand right then the techies it all with just like, but it
It was just now that was
tops off toward this week in evans,
kansas city, wichita down
as used in bread, those anodyne, anaheim san, diego morrison, colorado, veil, colorado, hollywood fourtou shows jacksonville mobile abbots furred see
oh portland milwaukee cincinnati nest.
Bill little rock springfield, philadelphia, norfolk, wisdom, salem fairfax, roanoke right
chester, Worcester, newark, providence and all, but a new york december tenth a loved you documentary. I am so thrilled you watch it we're from
You're not a kid, you know what I'm so much older than you home in somebody. Do that thanks I'll take that,
I'm seventy five. So
a generation upon you. I mean we're
miles and miles and miles apart and I have never paid attention. The calamity net
had never pay attention to radio
people say who's, your favorite, no comedian, I still say Chris rock, you know,
mean that sounds crazy, but when we went to that stop because you were dialed in for a period of
I'm with rodney and in san oh yeah. You know, but that
in early eighties. You know I mean I started really late in. Oh, I see
the comedy when I was thirty, one saw
I should be. You know, but when I talk about
peers ashore copy. You not really p.
of jerry seinfeld. But if you start at the same time, you don't mean but
so much older, like god
like where more fool around the clubs and in nineteen. Seventy eight before that we started actual comedy on long island like I was thirty
but eddie murphy was sixteen, but in the same room you know and die the jet interest time
time is such a month. I remember almost everything about the first year or two
of doing stand up route and so much of it from then on is a blur. I mean just,
it just because you saw impressionable of on your member, be bad shown. I gotta podcast two courts than memories and my friend Peter
your bail started at the comic strip.
Lebanon in seventy nine. So he was, you know, care
leave her and shine fell, then pull riser Larry miller, Dennis wolfsburg wallows character and he drew.
Me in there and got me involved and we did too
you calm seasons on pod gets better
dick assumes you stop and start when you want. Just like cable shells. Were we to two seasons before we had a guess, we couldn't shut up just
what about all crappy would talk about our whole lives? You know we had for decades to go to
it's funny. How most of the stories were about one remember what happened in nineteen eighty, you know
mom I memories from comedy for for real
when I started and
does, and I think you are still on
they are sorted. Ninety seven, when did you lose stern, two thousand one
you're still and stern. I started nice of ninety eight and that whole, that was,
an open anthony were still in new york there that a huge beef with stern
that was a permeating the clubs, Jim Norton Bobby Kelly,
korea ali
Jim brewery, growing geraldo David, tell
Mitch Hedberg that I remember distinctly when I saw
I remember, meeting Kevin Hart outside the club. Some of my best
and to this day I met standing on the steps of the boston comedy
now all those people you just named
I know most of them. Of course know of
no lost them, but never worked with anybody, because just
A huge chunk, just came out of my
stand up because start
mornings and nineteen? Eighty six until I left in two thousand and one the only
and I was doing was one eyed fly to chicago to do a night or fly to las vegas do two nights and I wasn't it hang him with the gang they'd put up an older or whatever, but they
I get treated royally and go out there and get paid a lot because they are. You know one of the
Are you, nuts, I'm so sorry on the worst interview in the world now one of the one things I kept wondering was
was made anxious.
I I got
a problem like you're gonna be laughing my favorite,
However, the documentary is when you commented on the guy's beard, you go, you look like you went down with it. What is it you down
I came up with it. That's just the greatest death. You know day you age, old, age, old, age, old, probably from nine from eighteen ten. You know what I mean. All those things have been around forever, but the right line.
right time. You know it I want you to. I was literally like I wonder if I could steal them and have them come into the club with me tonight and watch my act and take the fat out. I am, I am full of fat literally and figuratively. I would I I can't do that,
tonight, but I would kill to do that. I would killed the just come in
I honestly, no nothing and I purposely didn't trying.
a chop with through you are what you walk ass. I want this to be all new. To make us uninsurable, knew too, you know you're, not a hundred or so of interests is. Oh, my mother. I was first introduced. You when I was thinking maybe
not another guy around. No, maybe maybe like fifteen I'm it's when you did the dialing with dialing dead, jacketed, joke
five one. Six, nine two two wine still operate, my cousin maggie. We were philadelphia,
as she said, do you want here joke, and I said I said yeah she called up
and we also on the phone listened and when I went shut up issues. Oh my dazzlingly best it costs money. She goes.
and it didn't costs money. It just cost. Whatever call question
for a long while he was a long distance while they were phone fond
answering machines and my mother's attic. I mean you
I call on my mother only she happened to be in
in new york. But I love that day. You know
the such weird stories you know when they do we
round tables like of the star shall went to the grammy's or
to the year is out there. The
scores of some like that. There would always have round round think whatever
a big ballroom like lead vision.
On the stable and try to the all the different show. A celebrity could walk around the circumference.
And get interview by all the different radio stations and it must be
nineteen, eighty, six or seven or eight way way way and beginning regret,
but who was already pretty big, but he wasn't rick reuben yeah.
he sat down across and when we run on the road I wish tat. It was
me and then howard and robin I'm and of putney stuff up lines up for him and rick Reuben sat down
and the first thing he said was Jackie. I called
two to wine. Every morning before high school and leader beach, on in our answer,
south shore of long island, and I was like that's great I've. I've never
no I'll catch up with urban and barrel
Why the story and then my stupid book, I I tried so hard to get my my autobiography published
and I'm telling you get. You got run around and rushed I'm about you, but you hit slam and gifts
louder dodger you gotta forget about that and get up. You know
can't even get a surrender. You gotta have allowed a hard bargain and I find it
steel and I go out the guys. I awoke and assign your book
said when he was a little kid? He was
old enough to understand the function of a phone, but he had no
What do you call cause? I don't know whether it was five years old for years old, eight years old, but his father
must I had a dial, a joke sticker, so this guy that
join me for my book deal. The first phone call he ever made in his life, who puts the five point: six, nine, two two, ninety four six three. He said he he didn't
No one who is listening. Do we just so excited? You got the call somebody you know that shows that. Why would argue is the biggest I mean this is little.
For that, but I thought I think thinking back. That is the beginning of the
at the beginning of a community of people that you don't know where you could call it.
and find information and get something.
Were we called all night long, my cousin maggie my cousin abe, my sister annie in me, and we sat in our cousin
jenny's room and there in the third floor in north town pennsylvania me.
all night long and just how
laughing there's something so pure. Like look comedies wanting
what I'm doing right now and what? What time
he's doing about what we're doing what
we personalize it. That is one thing, but man there is nothing better than a joke like a straight, no two distinct things in
Oh I'm I've never claimed to be a comedian. I've always said I am a joke. Teller, you haven't, have access to every job and I have never ever claim to,
written these jobs, a bunch of my voice
and, of course, I put my share sharon's pile swarm allowed to draw from the pile and, what's funny is
that all those years in fifteen years ahead writer on starch or I never ever handed him a joke. I had my comment,
if you were talking to your producer, Peter and I'm shit in here and we're having lunch together. You got we're all talking only with I have something funny to say. Instead of saying it, I wrote it down
and you got to say you know she was like an
it was like magical show. There was never any joke jokes, but my act is always been jokes, jokes, jokes, because that's all I did that.
It's just something I always did since I was a kid I just like to make people laugh unaware that makes me a nice guy or have such a gigantic cool in my soul than another. I connects very, very title
with it. Is that I just I just you know I I
If there is, I have a lot of similarities in you in that I love a party. I love to have people over use of these big fourth July parties for the stern for the furthest.
the whole everyone you invited everyone, whack, packers and and and
crew and the staff and
and so I really connect with a lot of of
nor journey their parts, and I can't that I can't connect with like, but I look like
I would have never been able to befriend ronnie dangerfield,
never benevolent friend. I would
we're gonna work, my way into that our stern shall, like you, just have an abyss
but what I seriously market your site, but I didn't work my way into notes that he's gonna stepped in that I wrote you in the right place. At the right time, I wrote to rodney blind really,
What happened? I don't know how much is described in the documentary. Little boy. Don't amount was so I'm not creating it. I you know, I know about you, but you drop a pin.
Near the course of your life, and I drop my pen in january nineteen. Seventy nine was the first time
my got paid to tell jokes and play the guitar
supposed to playing
guitar and tone jokes. Ok, this little play
called the rainy night ass in queens, and I got a bit of a Billy calmly thing as era. When will you kindly the iris comedian was, I think,
position first, but his jokes were
much better than his music right songs. You guys parallel to you, while in the seventies me and my partner, we we wrote storms and told dirty,
George and the common thing was they ask us to do.
play the songs and make up for the judge. You just tell us, which is still funny agenda. I got a great
bombing story I was. I was plan play migratory. Tell my
like by now my band splintering we're about to break up some plan,
eggs by myself, which is how I got to be friends with these:
guys, because that I'd plan a ball
with my amplifier and my speakers and I set their play, my
guitar torrent. Tell joke show. I had a space where people who I had stage time so the guys
the long island guys like which you intervene and rob bar lytton, eddie murphy, and only they would come to my gigs, because
moratorium to get on stage five minutes, because it didn't exist anywhere saws plan at this place and so funny
I am sure when you tell your bombing stories, it's like,
still there, I remember distinctly online shopping from it.
and under my shirt, fine everyone see a bright rise on stage along bar.
You're a long room and I'm at the end up on a little platform play my guitar and tell my jokes and it's christmas week is like that,
when he. Secondly, twenty third december, this like two couples in the place,
in its show shared.
unbelievable, and this for people and aunt up there
of course play my songs tell by jokes and play my shows us how many jobs in the garden?
scottish bartender and, of course I hit. I get him back with perfect straight line because jack
they watch outside, and I said who is at every Bobby. I can still hear that son of a bitch said up is like the perfect squelch. I like such an area and you dont forget those than but it was a great great,
I'm sorry, you know, how did you me robbed me again so that you could
You are good and know not why you didn't go off track it on all. No, no, I'm not really interested in you leave the gay think that aside solid on I've got no less.
So I met these guys. You know it either ike
no, I don't. I run the risk of always been too chatty, but I'm ok use your so comfortable on my ban. We,
terrible we're little to peace, and we became a three peace ban to guitars, coups d, guitars and a guy on on the piano, but he also
play debase with his left hand, so we are horrible, but we will fun in his
The club on long island called my father's place, which was very famous, especially for the place,
You know mick jagger and bruce Springsteen. Everybody came through. There was the spot on long island women when they were rock bottom rock bottom, but that swift venom
and at the guide owned it was Ebby Epstein, the cheapest somber bush than ever,
and he still is any still walking
and I remember when I first in a room what Robert Klein, unlike what do you say to an icon like Robert climbed anda,
I walked up to and showed a robber.
Api says allow he says: how much does he owe yet then that's what atlanta, forty years? Okay, so my band is playing
my father's place and we're not big enough to play my father's place, but all of our fans would come out.
Oh, if everybody mashed, we probably add three hundred but average gig probably had twenty five
the whole world, would come out. Shall we go? We go there for us
check. This is a big deal for us here we go for us.
Found check, and we can't was sound check, cause that cheap bastard, epic
Booked gong show auditions for a b c.
He be at six o clock to make
you actually dalia function there and wilson is a couple comics em like
what's funny as these guys and I walked up to one of them whose book but a lifelong friend for less fifty year? However, I should geez
you get to be a comedian any he. I had cards printed up and it has raised
which I still have
and I said you should stick around watch my bandy stuck where I said. Well you
funny how you should come to richard m dixons white house in so I go there and then
I literally had his face surgically altered to look like richard m Nixon now
can, I have your face. Altered said I jus
such a funny when he had a head start in this. Was richard m dixons white house in an eddie murphy and
I'll be collins and rob bartlett and gave forth
born in richmond have been all these got. We all started, but dixon wouldn't pay anybody. He just wouldn't pay anybody. He was such a cheap bastard. He only passed like five bucks
and we hated so me, enrich we found a restaurant. Let us have do comedy on a tuesday night
and you'll get some people. You shall some drinks shall some food and will take the door. So we,
that was so excited about this. For the time my grim
would pass swam living. My grandma's house would my girlfriend and richie is becoming a good friend,
What happened. Pretty quick and aid would stop over
so he comes in and you know I know about you, but in the beginning all the guys lie
Could you have the lie to try and met justify this stupid thing? You're trying to accomplish
yeah and richie comes, as is our man. What a night I want the danger fields I had such a great
shut up their men, rodney told me I was great and he's going to do
the way if you get some tea
stuff he showed it could have been better.
like show jealous, I mean I'm done
not started as a community and I'm just branching that put my feet in the water and where the run these at this time in his thing, not kadesh, I get no.
those women do Amory Kadesh actual carson hit. He did dean Martin every
week for a couple years and doing carson
three times a year, and I will
then a comedy ban, but that was big news,
would go round my front, hey robberies on road design and he was married murders and they have to do is done. We get each other on the phone and we spent his jokes back and forth
because I loved him cause. He wasn't a great. He was a joke teller. He was a bang bang and he would say what, when we're tiziano or tell where I live, er bara guevara, the joker I wanted jokes rick of the lead skipper, let which is was my thing from the beginning, so I'm so jealous that he did greatest danger fields and
she sat down and took every joke that was
My repertoire, wherever that I could think of that, I could make in terror,
knees voice and his point of view. I am typing away and I've got a regular typewriter
With a carbon copy, I figure in the sense that to him and keep the carbon copy a month before
you're, a friend of mine, is improved. I know this is a two week when other events region- I know you go in to show my friends in Peru with
while the guy's shell co, buying coke, because we
I thought it was a visit trap. You hey caused me up like this
four in the morning,
and he knows that I'm drunk because I was always drunk. So he knows enough to keep me on the phone for a few minutes. So I'll. Remember the Fogel chief. He used to call me chief with no respect at all
you got it written guy man does god? Does you bob to fund managers dominant funniest god? Damn thing you should tell us
bob said so. There's a girl mounted a tendency to bagger that's good
What show all show ugly in our only hope for a bag over her head? You gotta put a bang over your own head engaged her bag rips, his wife.
Well out of bed lamp and that becomes part of the jokes than I tell
sure that's one of these six paid
is a joke. I typed out. Ok, I take the six pages folded up.
Put him in an envelope, wrote rodney dangerfield
and the next time reduced option a couple days later to hate
please, you gotta give these to your friend, rodney dangerfield.
Goes all man he says he's he's. I didn't meet rodney.
I didn't get on stage. I I you know
but I was there. I was at any I swear to you. Go I shorty bertie, reaches, pluck and took out the match book would run
Do you want? You want one eight first avenue: where am I gonna? Do I already
I paid out. It's already arranged rod negate phil, I just road underneath
the address and mailed it. Why not
Two days later, I swear on my mother, I'm shitting in my grandmother's kitchen with my girlfriend, whose lebanon with me, nobody
Has this phone number everybody she had met is dead too, and the farm rings
So as a far lower belong, who is, as his rod I said,
be who I knew you a fucking funny. You know I knew you were funny then lowest like who is that is its rodney danger that war is reaching its?
is funny stuff is due by a funny joke ever heard you come too
spare your honour by a couple these robots and I went to me-
westbury in either
ponytail and torn
blue jeans, my girlfriends ten years younger it he's like
well she's beautiful. Look at that point. You want a piece of fruit at what with the blue jays with the hair. Well, what a message which is cute you're wearing a couple of jokes funny, jokes to beggar, best joke about, and my head is spinning and he bought for jokes and and we're off to the race
and that was, and he today died. He claimed the tobacco was his best joke.
I didn't write. I heard that the dog it's a great job and the guy that told it to my friend and write it and that's
then probably around since bags
were invented, but the right joke in them,
right place and he was just in
but I didn't get introduced and minimal
The dinner was just like you know, he's sure.
great joke, like a command.
Just gravitated to gravitates me and the whole crazy.
it is insured, but that which was fine and at what I went away with him for two weeks and I'm still poor
stories. Out of my ass from two weeks from the two weeks have already so crazy. You know wonder when fort lauderdale for a week,
and he wasn't work and he was soon vacation with his daughter and his son, and I was with them in a light
I wouldn't got the rent. A car took the girls and me food on flora. I rented a car down there than picked him up at the airport. It wouldn't it would
sound like I'm, making we gotta get his baggage and stuff he's got cardboard boxes.
wrapped in string in toys.
I am not making this up, and these he's
ready, unknown guy it shuts it just absolutely endless gino
da. I love little. I love little.
Interests. It is about my
heroes that I hear like I I remember someone telling me you know rotten
get off stage and put on a robe? They said there
taken in a robe and between shows the blue rob a class
ready blue rob, there's not a comic in new york.
Then she, the rally blue, rob and as you
hanging sack
You know just what actual units answer the door
maybe
you couldn't even make that up and you know we're in fort lauderdale and I shut up as he he brought a toaster oven and he brought the two cardboard boxes were toaster oven and the other one was just a big sal
the bull and you have them philip. Would let us whatever any would eat luck it so far
my nephew? Should I like a monster right, the eight like a much just chauvelin it in
so. I said on this is thing I took a couple of those little tables and promote,
up each other, so could easily access the toaster fill us not bad. You know. So we got the money
vegas. You gotta shut up the thing I said yeah well, you know give me a couple of two channel yana. He lays out the coke and boom we got. It was just it was
It was already set in stone, but it was only the second time in those last time it ever happen. What was it would? What was the partying like? Was it like? Get up good a breakfast? Have
drink was it now he don't drink. During the day he used to say you can drink all day, hell yeah, you know gama,
vacation, you're, the one working in one we we got the pool or at it when I picked up his daughter and her friend at his apartment, and he came out in his
the luggage would put their luggage in that trunk, so melody and job. But I said
boss. You got understand, I'm gonna live every
time. You open your manner, and this is what they want. What of it, because it just was
funny, he was, is done a footman, not he wasn't a funny guy. He was not a funny guy really, but
but it was the lifeline any was down,
finally funny, but he was that guy. He was that guy,
he was you don't like you walk into the hotel room
a black and white nuthin. Funny like oh, I turn the tv black and white nothin funny, but its not being too.
I'll, be in serious and issues
but the silly little things bade me not like we were
became more.
There were around his veranda
extending them little motel room motel, which was part of
I'm already stated in the high rise or our
was verandah smoke and a joint
and the sixteen year old, daughter walks in Rome adjusts daddy
No, you don't put me, I should do
I want to spend how exactly beers supposed to be captured spoken by she's catch a great just. So all this
joking for at Jesu jet they're, just your eye.
Who they had play that seen a thousand times year. Soldiers,
so it was of images phenomenal. Just
go on and on and what a great life experience to have had, I mean like- and I am certain that people have.
certain one day, I'll be sub, hopefully I'll get to seventy five and people would be like
What was patrice o neill or gregg, Geraldo, lichen and I'll say or
Jackie, morland and or
still be here. You son of a bitch I observe, and just in case you will still be here. The
but then guess you know, because you carry
the end the memories like every memory they just become the norm.
Eighteen, ninety stern show has become the nineteen twenty seven yankees.
when I type it is more and more and more and more bold, and it was, I would say I have to
recently about. I still think stearns
the best straight one on one interviewers with people offer him him emma rogan her neck and neck broken can do
three our interview with someone, but this
turn show
is no longer what it was
different. Shouted. We just don't have been shelves, but but
when you were on its it's interesting, because I think.
And I could be totally wrong, but I think you, your involvement, created the
someone walks in the room is time to bust balls. I think that was primarily you
I do not think I was the sand and the gears- and it was funny gary, would come
and sometimes in the morning. Oh, what's the problem, the crabs gonna fly.
there we got. No guess, though, guess days, a war which meant that the job
I was gonna, be on him on John on robin on me on fred on how all of us, in our view,
we're getting hammered. The trick was to you no more
the firing line. You don't like look over fret, you know and
around each other out from the weak yeah. The best, as was someone had a secret from the
weekend and you'd come in
and I knew it- and I do it. I know you know- and I know that that's I bought the man's howard ever got at me.
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howard ever got at me was because they had this gem. They do. They had this gem that that fred at at a huge knocked down blow hours,
wife at the rainbow room and mayonnaise
you were there with them and they thought. While you know
This is going to be some story and I wouldn't say a word and he still probably pissed really because it goes on
We also want no to for the show all for the shone like that's. My friend
and I didn't even say that's my friend, I'm not saying nothing. I'm unlike I just climbed up
was it you pal and your marriage. You know it's.
It's interesting to watch a friend change
My body, my best friend, has now
suddenly lost a lot of weight and his
The battery unease changed for the better, but there was a time when he was a sloppy fat. Fuckin weeds eating, just fuckin.
comic, degenerate bulls for a wall, tat paul. It was just the.
and these changes and I love him to death, were still with social partners together our best friends,
but I remember when a change because he felt he broke, his armor broke his leg and then there-
a shift re. My wife was part of it.
She told him you're gonna be a fat fuck after this and it for each. I think it, but with his head
Anyone. I will not allow that to happen. He nipped it in the butt he lives in the bud. But it's interesting to watch to watch friends.
change. I remember the first time. Rogan told us, you know people listening to this like when we're done is broadcast
If people are listed as you think about what you're gonna say before you come on and all of us like no
so you're, just a you know like- should think about
No that's why he has now. He has, I think, primarily
these brilliant minds. Long as he's he knows, you know an
wasn't: a change rose, a change in light from like the one we just talk, wild and smoke weed and get drunk as part of curious. Did you could you pinpointed
I'm, when howard went from this fuckin raw,
are you crazy till I
norton to shift. Was it when serious are now? I wasn't gone yet, but there were
the she drove, I think been a little song after he started to date. Beth, I think, ah
we are getting hammered, shall we, I always say we. I I apologize or citizen, as I always thought it was a team effort, and I say we, but I should say he ah we're get
show bad by them
if she see that you know
you couldn't say literally, he could say shit
you know and agenda so that all did things a little bit and got very, very frustrating and very crazy. But I love that because that that was the
challenge that was the five zero when serious started on it
does it- wasn't serious- accept ministers and his excellent right, o howard creed- I mean
when he moved to serious. That was the biggest I wondered. There's people listen, don't
understand. How big howard was like how big an out definitively and I have to go before
I was not a stern van growing up. I wasn't there no been anthony,
van growing up it wasn't. I moved to new york that I under stood
who he was, and I don't think I understood the fact he had on
radio in general until I saw this in open anthony and then I realized
and then the best would be. You had this huge catalogue of howard. I had serious,
had exam
and so I will, what a huge
he had on media in general because
I think maybe you Senator someone said it, but, like all the sudden rise,
yo programme, pr programme directors around the country,
try going you do the stern that was belly, Wes billy west, so I said that he was just saying what we believe:
for these things, Billy said is hollywood is, is a town full of people where, if lightning strikes,
they all run to that spot, waiting for lightning to strike again, which is just tells a story. You know the story of sequels billy west is under represented in in the stern history. I feel it you know, I I don't listen and I don't follow so I don't know anything. But people come
listen to me all the time that there is less and less billy and less and less jackie. Unless, unless this that- and I could
go on and on, but when I try
about any of it to so many people.
Comes across when you sit
and tell the truth. People like, oh you're, just bitter, is not better. If you told the truth,
you can read my book and say you know, he's bitter
making anything up, I got no axe to grind, and this doesn't mean.
if you just say what happened and the
little incision. Instances of things that happen would would the average person me like now. What's the big deal about that, but everything that happens is. Is it
Is it something that happens again and again against of your and at once?
If catch somebody still money, audio attitude, you you'd europe
draws. Why use women? That's not the
first time. At last time they gonna do it enormously. Like people set up agenda,
stop the one on and on, but why they they say:
that they chop out more and more and more
then some years ago I just heard this whole thing on the radio. You? U doggedness in you doing that, and this shit
makes you crazy. There was this whole thing where I got a hotel room in Florida me and my wife we'd never book the hotel
room in time cycle
the marriage or the florida of offence?
Maybe I should only stations dave. I can't get a red resonate. Can you get me a place to stay in florida? She got,
glory ass, the fawn sweet above the cardoza hotel, but she owned and we paid for it. So how
it gets wind of this and we come back from vacation and he goes on this tirade for twenty or thirty minutes. You use my name to get a free room, a piece of crap that that the app app app
Finally, I said: are you through now,
through I d like to tell you we paid for that role. They cut that out.
Of people they heard on the radio. You never hear me say why by militia
what people say. No univee you'd never say
you paid for the wrong so yeah
I study about eleven email wait right now. What are you gonna pay for the Cardoso hotel? You know, that's, that's
none of the cup things out like that.
it interesting as a rule number one and one in by casting is like.
I mean, but I guess radios did, I mean I'd say really was different, but that is kind of shit that dutch machine being
jerry was, is was his genius. You know, and you got further to I tell people I
No, I would never be back on that shall because the day I left that show vacation
started for robin and fred and gary
cause. I was the one through the sand and the gears and said fur.
Aids from margin and robin make fun of her laugh, ungarish, gotta biggest nobody's
we had to throw the sin and the gears this sailed on smoothly. But there was you know, people say you, don't the rubbish go on without the rub, you know. So, who knows you know yeah it's.
I mean you know. I have a hard time because I feel like without I it's it's on
psycho! Whenever I
talk about. Howard is kind like talking about my parents, but they all got divorced because every,
well I've always loved militia was left it like you and I,
are eager you, no obvious
the comic that third MIKE seat was a very coveted kind of apprised
see. That was where that was the father.
Then, unlike and like there's a lot of things, I've people don't even know of your contribution, like the nimble.
Web ui was there was because of you. Do you know
This, then a producer muddling not like that is the calling card of the howard stern, so bubba buoy, but the big, the big thing
as I said earlier the day, the guy who produce at my whose by radio partner for eight years, we had jackie's joke cunt.
on howard, one under one and he did she
you, didn't, talk the nancy Ellen,
interview. I was never there when people got interviewed the first time I heard her say the thing about baba boy,
When I was watching the screening of the movie. She had never said that she does
said that in passing and and its accurate
what is so funny- and I wonder if you go back and listen to the taper that day, if that's all of the written, but it was such a
anything. I didn't even know that card to just sounded. I remember how such weight and I- and I think I
fred. Firstly, we do way. You know is that ripe ababa show, so I picked up on it, but that doesn't mean Fred mine.
however? How might not oh yeah right, but that the greater
think thing about that is after you did that, then scott of course made the bubble
We bubble boy and brought down the cart
and we hammered away for like forty five minutes and then when we went to commercial, carries, could still see you you've walked out
it studio, returns it well. I guess you beat down the turf,
now, like verily infrared theirs in all rights habitually future.
Suddenly he filled with my aunt started. Endeavour heard it's crazy for me to hear some of these stores, because
you guys into insane with- and I have to, I have to say, open anthony because of the group. All these groups together for for my
time of what I listen to announce early in young, an instant stand up, but like it
based upon casting their progress in now, people feel like they know everything about you. U s kind of created that, like like, I was a big fan of kyoto, five and in florida, and I
Couldn't tell you much about those guys. I was a fan of ron and ron in in in florida.
rumbling can run. I
still never knew much about those guys on the show and then
and then run bennington sorted serious examined. I was like holy fuck
I knew not this. I love this guy.
you go in there, but there was no knowledge in a light. Cousin, bruces
because the aruji w b c, even mary, the K s famous as he was you
no sense of him over this
I believe you. I got a picture him poolside with George harrison, and I showed the people and I define
people to guess what is good he's not wearing his stupid port by hat so
could be any and george cherishes. The civil skinny guys idea. Sixty foreign poolside miami, you gonna, do I care actors, you're yourselves, and then you shared everything about yourselves and that and that that is one hundred percent couch gmt
although I will never defined in our that is, that is going down on the way to eyes and gettin the tin, man and-
the cowardly lion and the scarecrow, you know that it was a. It was just you know. He knew who to hang on to
You know that's why not let everyone strader out and then cast the whole thing.
if the whole show was killing like this
Sullivan show at solving. Never did a thing in this life except put together. This incredible show, and that's the name you remember his umbrella- was how it
umbrella didn't didn't even after all the marbles, but he did you know so was very strange.
I always wonder, because I know that there was such a discrepancy.
In pay from what he was getting
I'm not asking exactly what you got: pay we weren't stern but like how big was a discrepancy because-
as it is the reason you left and it
The reason I actually one of the sometimes, where I wonder you know, or in a bit
This were the name, gets all the money and then they pay
everyone else, and I always wonder
and I have said this allowed- how to incentivize the people there
you working with. Do not leave you because you'd there either
someone made it a great line. Bear the steel that makes up the building and you know
I'm not and I'm not faulty howard for taking the big pay day at all.
Without howard's native howard, is, I believe, a show, no one at jobs by not out, but I
what I am wondering. What was how big was
discrepancy, and was you know I just watch
beat the beanie bubble and
young lady, who was to create a their website about being a baby's. I did not watch tat. Yes, she got paid fourteen dollars an hour and she was she created the entire marketing
ever beanie, babies, any wouldn't regular rays, and so she left
and I saw that and then I saw your documentary and went. Maybe that is the key
greatness is finding out. You know you hear about
Tom Brady sentiment in pay cuts, we apparent get the best offensive, lineman blind man or these big, these big athlete
I'm gonna take a pay drop, so we can make sure we have the best team on the field. You know they just they did this.
she's in finale, a blue blood's. They should
a real lot of at my house a couple months ago,
and they do on another she's and I think they did a watch tv. I think they did twelve seasons, and now they can do a thirteenth season and all of them took pay cuts, so they could do not. The seas
and this is before the strike and over the so I don't know what's going on, but that's the kind of,
but there was no. There was
none of that on the stern show, was absolutely divide and conquer. It was two distinct ways of running a company like patent. Every
we are back in, and greece on the sand where a team we're a team and the other one is not better. We break
be scared, shitless that the job could be online. You know, and
Nobody knew anything reserve birds cards were played, show close to the best, and I,
never used. The word discrepancy because it's not discrepancy if, if its miles, you know- and I fought from the beginning-
I knew I don't want a boy, but when I first born reversing mornings, ah don buchwald represented howard dunbar was alleged and an robin quivers. Why of other words,
recital howard
and and fred and need,
I mean come on mornings twice a week, my home
all the time in the stern show. My entire job description
I said, listen we're gone. He called me up was on the road in virginia beach at the virginia beach comedy club. He said,
then we're gonna mornings? I need a price for two.
Days a week. I want you to come in and do
The thing with the notes that was my job description, that
the last was ever discussed- goes over the course of time it and b c and then a key iraq, india
are slowly but surely give him my dears, given my dears end and all of a sudden you he's looking
you know sure, wish the show. I started for two days a week and then three days a week-
pretty sure in five days a week because toothpick
He was a lot funnier when I
was there jokers, would two minds working instead of one though branch eggs to me. What on so he's killin, but I got paid crap,
and then I fought to get a little more. But if somebody paying you up,
a day and then they give you
japan, he just said: well, we gave you a hundred percent raised, but Jesus. You know I am exaggerating too. You know,
As I in Georgia say I exaggerate the clarifying wow. That's that's all
george. I've always said I exist.
Rachel. You know how I felt they were going. I do too
feel how I felt the story so I'll. Tell you a little bigger. Rather car was like the crows at what twenty four car. If it
the cadillacs. I need you to know that it's it's fuckin hugh. I need
I need to move your mind yeah. I need to move your mind to catch up with
now you're half fucking was auto. Otto was fucking amazing,
May I not all with
people in the seven,
in the late
he's already nine and eighty eighty one we were the guy
they couldn't get blocked, because we're too filthy always so widely as possible.
I bought a lotta shows, and I would book him
and I shall said I I can-
use you anymore, because you can't tell if you,
he'll come one out of three times I can have the headline, not short. I love you too, that right book and you
they must have forty. You know, but hang on, hang on real, quick, not a degree,
from this now conversation, but like people, men,
no, who auto in george our d rachel.
Who also ensures our christine diego halting? Do you know
how otto and george can you did
Explain ato and the act about george. The easiest way to explain ato and george is that george was maybe the worst ventriloquist's dummy
a scary, is anything in those movies
the years that Georgia's mouth did not work and otto had to reach over and work with this
And possess so stone he couldn't get it to work and george, the dough
would yell at all for being to stone.
or too high, or to cope up. The dummy would yell at ato and ato cut georgia's head
cut the his scalp.
Under the hare, painted it read
and he would say- and here's an impression
november twenty second nineteen sixty three and it would take the dummy and jerk and his hair would fly back and like us.
that was just blown woven, be all red and was like.
I mean that is so foul and so wrong, but so it's just a script of how completely over the top didn't care. He was he
does. He was one of those tapes that you'd go to a friends house and they drove you seen auto georgian you'd say no and they put it in any
watch the person watch him for the first time and you do your mouth would be openly shut. The fuck up
So many of the four I would argue- and I dare any
when the challenge this so many
The phrase is we have a comedy today were created by otto
created by out of that. We just kill yourself. You know like it is
our zero. You know that
I can still remember that you know where were you when JFK got shot? I remember where I was. I was at the rent that place the rainy night. I was a little skinny room opposed to the stage thats a man rob bartlett are sitting across like this room.
The stage and then roamed the waitresses and then one line of two tops where the stages I mean a sitting there and I I think
actually ran tape, because I Gaza wonders she was going on, but we neither
said she and ato before, and he comes out.
And when you she summoned- and I was so new- the comedy and select nineteen. Seventy eight, probably
I realise that this is the guy's act, so you think they're working off the top,
and he comes out and all the innocent
jane girl, sitting right ringside any puts the dummies face right,
remained nosed and elsewhere.
goes. Name is azerbaijan,
ready. I know you
people are happy unless you be encouraged by a fuckin monster. I thought my heart
we're going to stop me a bottle like you. I can't believe- and I have been bought alike
You know the kind. No one can get your breath. I thought I was gonna die like global, and but that was his
I thought that was off the top of his head. You know like change, rice yeah, you,
He was outrageous, but pan and past probably pry, now ten years twelve years ago, guessing yeah junk
you know manual both in the movie comedy sturdiest dozen
I salute the young people I saw that hold on. I saw them
had. Who else was in the tim Alan chris rock bill? Hicks? Yes,
ato and george ass, the legend
John fox, oh wow out, and I was twelve.
I went, that I went on thirty. Sixth, because MIKE Egon would go up and warm up the crowd.
Bring up Ben creed. Who was the m, she would introduce the first comedian and they
armed with seven minute film canisters show after each comedian, they headed
change film canisters so even entered,
his creed creed introduced committee, a number one and we did sediments they'd redo. The cameras
in order to screen journals callum. So why would on thirty six? That would be a clock.
in the morning: can you watch it online? I'm pretty
even though, but of course it was just
just so much fun. It was so while so so wild and
they're all around like that. But I was then, as we have been on chocolate, kiss and money. Hoffman is one a new money, your money hoffman a new money. He he rubber stamped,
a story that I told we at robin williams and stern, shall once- and I dont know at what-
Why? Y Y? No we're already on ah mornings on w are extra kay
So it had to be nineteen, eighty six at the very very earliest
but I know what robin wins was promoting, whether we still more of what it was but
came on the show- and I swear
he's smelled, show ripe. I thought I was
to choke and he's really harry harry guy? You could see the hare poking out, but free
did not remember I should. How could you miss said he sunk so bad and nobody ever
leave me another. We did comrades thirty's dozen and I heard mighty hoffman,
about hanging our robin Williams. I should I gotta ask is something he came on
studies show, and he read- is that my crazy mommy said no. He never
took a shower. Does he did?
wanna shares coke
but it could not be around because it smelled so bed now.
Of money made- that up and lucy rubber stamp by story. Grey was a with such money was a car. They will all crazy gags reach us at the time of a lifetime sleep.
pearls amazing in know, and creed they're they're, all great. There were all great great great when you look back at the stern show. What was your
fondest like your favorite day. There were you, went god, damn it never get,
nothing's ever gonna beat that I got twentieth seemingly one.
I was sitting there and the door comes flying about about six fifteen and in walks. I can never think of the guys them from now.
Heart whose none of the other guy did the the really.
First. The need show the one of his work
One of his saw one of his patience yourself, but new forecast that just that just
erect the whole story than I know this, and I know the guy's name so well pursues a jack right. Reilly
Riley bloom, the door opens up and in walks
sam kennison, jack, riley, pat mccormick and chop mccann can
Further like it six fifty in the morning- and I got the mount rushmore of funny behind me
yeah we're in l a you know, we're dudes of coke and, I said, come on: let's go to the star Joe. We grabbed a big bag of coke and granted my jet and cape just gotten jet and flew out, and why don't? I
wonder. If that's on on the web, I've never look, but that was
Those days were you, George just dropped cause any any tore them. You know. I have a comment of chalk mckenna, we're talking about you're, tired childhood and your life funding. This gino
and then one day it's such a small studio. We have James taylor on not sit near,
is so small that the gas is sitting right here,
One leaves the news which
Taylor plays
for sure and are our knees, a touch it
And I'm thinking you know, nobody ever has shut,
close to him when he's playing a song cause- would never be any. Nobody would have a say. Let me shall close, I could I could and I'm sitting right and horrible things about him. You know when they wrote fire and rain. We keep in time by banging your head against the padded celebrate the almighty god, you know just just, but the story
like that go on and on you know, I'm in the feed knight of the of the film from air which was over the top
five reports. Yet we are, we did a week from abbe road from the.
Actual the room where they did it, where they made all love, but where the beatles that all we did a week there like you, don't like it was pinch me for entire week. You know like
and those stories go on and on and they would just you will creep memories. Oh christ. You know- and I may I wrote my book and I wrote enough for two books and I could, if I were there
get off my ass to sit down, but once read all the stuff, but
on and on and the crazy shit that happened, I mean I spent two days.
Next to a naked jenna jamieson for the for the thing and private parts where the first girl came in to take off a closure and you'll. But the
way. They shot private parts since it was hoped so hard with the radio show. God on that, there was no time set time for shoots, so called french service, which means the full buffeted is available
everybody at all time the whole shoot and his
jameson standing at the buffeted nor with an open bathtub, were
she's just stand right then the tackled these techies it all just like bumpety
she was just ballads: thou back was a movie flow. The mayor glows, one of the best movies just
just check was your. Was your? Was your road money going up it exports exponentially during this time? Yet you know it was. It was crazy because I'm working five days a week from gettin up it forth there
and killing yourself and you not you're, not a early to bed kind of guy. What I think I got up at four o clock in the morning twice in my entire life, like once the go, fishing and wants to drive home verbs charitable my buddies family as that's out rare, I actually remembered it and it was. It was surreal. I Emmy dave deva herman who he is
cast the way in which, through whole pet of wild thing, he was twenty five years morning? Twenty five years
one guy on WMD w by eta.
And we got the mornings on K rock. He was the next. You know he came on ten o'clock and after a couple days, I'm telling you. I am bleary and I said herman you gotta tell me you did this for twenty five years. At what point do you get used to
And I can still see him, he got this maniacal smile and he said
you never get. You lie say, give it a month. You never get. He was absolutely right and.
So was so hard and I lived on will launch on commuting every day from beautiful babies mood garden spot,
and deliver the same house, you still lived in back then. Ah, no but they're around the corner, yeah. I I snuck up on. I lived a block from the beach and and half a block, and now I'm right on the water
but it was just that we just so great and I would do gigs like global gigs
I could do a show on a thursday or what
stay.
Take a room that would be dark. You're grass was gonna grab would be dark on thursday if I promoted it twice a day for five five
a week- I could shell out rascals and get the door and heat
Fortune I make a fortune which was a gold mine, but then we are big enough that would get syndicated and at the end of work in five days
I'm not ready to go on roads. You that a waggle some money, not of course,
comic and I want to go out, but I gotta be able rationalized, my wife looked kiss. I know this is a hundred times more
I have made sure wilson, I'm done
then go to chicago, and I'm going I mean I I think back. I dont know how like, for instance, I get up at fourteen
in the morning go and do the stern show.
I didn't leave to the airport.
Those days there was not a direct flight to las vegas after twelve o clock in the afternoon of shares or everything went through phoenix or america west, the whatever it was.
Shut up at four thirty, I do the stern. Shall I go the airport I felt like it not ruin exit fly from there to las Vegas.
and my show at the riviera- was ten o clock.
Which means that one in the morning I ve been options for thirty one, and not only that went on
With the show, the pressures-
Ah, I have a mite huge party which
I didn't mind, of course, but IRAN, where
guinan steam and they, the guy. The book me at the time was steeps. Europa
oh yes, Steve gotta go about their rights while he had, but he was the the entertainment directive. People forget,
sure, but yes, your back an ounce of fear before he got on the surprise and I'm glad because everybody that came to town where they were tv, booker's producers,
movie- people whatever he'd, invite him through riviera and get him dinner and get him to show that it would really just kiss
SK as you like this,
I guess it s. It's it's plan, D, J job, you know, and I
cabotage jackhammer, be in this Bobby. I went up and the cutting via river and all son
on the sopranos lama. Coolly question I called patricians secretary said I was
just out there, how did you get that fat confusion?
No, it's a fact suit. He was wearing a fashion
but he had such a neck like a bull here that the fat shoot it look like
that's the size you was rich. Younger good. Also,
as you know, but the money
got more and more because I didn't want to go
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Am I go. I am I am. I am talking here. I'm love love and I shall not be into no love liquid. Death is water yeah. That self funding is a good
This then, the noisy brothers on long island that sell ice and if they are
on the side of truckers evasion,
naturally eyes it's just hard border, which he pitch in future best MIKE engraved with you crazy
no, I could listen. You talk forever. This is
You know I think, for for true fans of us, and I think, even for the people who don't know the history of where how we got gotta podcasting is impossible without
how without two things without stern and without serious ex them. Without you
For example? We would have never understood that you could do for hours just of fucking car
just meandered into a long form you just because
Everything was tight. Everything was short. Everything was on breaks yet to make it up
quick, if you said five words incoming, say, don't say five words. She forwards. Yeah, you know know when I first started NBC the programme direct route that was accurate and movie
there's an idea you talk from,
on two minutes, our get more to it. You know I would still like that places.
Oh yeah. I went into a radio station now
I wouldn't go in, but I called and they were like
we do like. Would you like a five minute break with you and I was like element a pass and then at what, as I am
it's just that I'm existing iranian say hello, yoda aids and those those radio formats,
go and do their shows there just they're, not
phone you just started to well. Thank you very much. I m, like those abuse
of stone. I gives a stern there. Is it that whole?
energy out there
The stern show was that you'd get these long form wild interviews of Andy kong and drunk or or
in just a minute. Catalyzing being is a long form interview on his people forget just like you thought about people for
get that vision, millions and millions of people you know like,
the chevy chase forgot that millions of people will listening a robber climb forgot. You know a lot of people, I mean that was the beauty of it was like
but it was the beauty of what happened we started doing. Rogan is like you didn't know, people were listening and you are
just how you really couldn't conceive of it. You know, and especially with us, when we start
Gettin syndicated you couldn't
it was hard. You know if you're a comic anything.
Something funny you going to do in your act. That night like if I, if I found a new joke, oh I can't wait so that night you do it. Maybe it works. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe it works big time and then maybe
actually you could try it again, but if you're in a movie you may be, you say something funny. You get a couple lines with.
He looked more becomes out in a year to, and maybe it can make people laugh,
We're gone a million miles an hour and I'm writing something down put in front of him.
his share in it and instantly millions, not exaggerate millions
people are laughing at the same time, so many people said gamma expressway and you see all the heads morbid Kosovo or laugh and at the same thing, let's that's crazy, but that
just new york, but when you do that times fit
These cities, it it's a little in on you, you can in rapid brenner. You can't give up your brain round it. Is it because it really is I mean that the numbers? What was? Can you see what, if you can find at the height of stern syndicates fashion, what his listener ship? What
I bet it I'd, be that's pretty hard to gauge, because every time he shuddered at one up by five million, but that it was like fifty five stations I think, at the height
and you know- and I know I got you off track, but what what happened was we were doing so great and I say we,
You know the show is doing so great. They were printing money
they literally were printing money,
and I know damn well, but nobody would ever say a word in those like the people in line in auschwitz. At the death camp,
you know they are lying d gone the showers and nobody saving and I'm the guy gone. You gotta do what they can. You gotta be kidding me and dumb show at one point.
making three hundred grand? This is early, make it three underground and
I used to go on the road and going to look different.
Affiliates, and they love me because Fred wasn't goin guy
Wasn't gonna didn't have an active powered robin shall
the ambassador of the show, but I love glum, make money and selling stuff on end beaten, people, and you know capital and fun and
just just phenomenal, and then I was back. A three hundred grand was time for contract renewal.
and they offered me a seven percent salesman's race, and I should know no, no like what you don't.
turn that thirty seven thousand dolls us a lot of money is spent there like you know, and it was like how it said what you gonna talk to mail and melt.
I said you gotta talk to Tom and that and you know, when you go into the boss for a raise you get eager,
stomach and are not new light on the wind and you try and power up and its intimidating. You know,
in I'm the only guy ever opening his mouth. You know nothing against free.
But in forty years of fifty years with howard, I know he has never said the words I want more ever
and I'm the guy sit next to him, so they that makes me look so the guy from rochester seed.
our draft great guy small market.
And he only station and it was the manager- and he said, Jackie, listen.
no matter how small your market is.
Bottom line. If you want the stern show its two hundred and fifty thousand dollars, it's a quarter of a million
that doesn't cover the satellite uncover anyway. That's what you pay for the right to broadcast stern. Shall I said
much good to know. He said just remember, he's such a good guy said.
Your job is to go on stage. Make people laugh. That's your job
general manager. Illustration point: you come
international, more money. He falls.
This chair, that's his job
ok, let's his job. So I finally working with Tom chissano- and he goes. What are we talking here? What what kind of raise lookin for.
I said I, I want a hundred thousand dollar race and you would have thought I just chopped up his child and furthermore they should you want four hundred thousand dollars. Russia makes total sense. Is how would you come up with a figure like
I was pretty easy. Ah I know that the very
bottom line for a new affiliate,
is a quarter million dollars a year. Two hundred fifty thousand dollars a year
and since the last contract I know we've added ten stations
many of 'em way bigger than the smallest and
and they're all paying a minimum of two hundred and fifty thousand dollars a year, and I figure two hundred fifty thousand dollars yeah. I said if I'm not worth one twenty fifth of this show. What good am I you know, and so I figure one
of two hundred fifty thousand dollars. I mean one twenty fifth of toward him. Fifty thousand dollars is fair time,
Ten stations makes a hunter
thousand dollars, and he said to me Jackie one. Twenty fifth of torn fifty thousand dollars is not ten thousand dollars. I should go ahead. It turns the truth. Is that the ep
she did and he did it at the end and I soon got his shoulders drop. Six inches he's like oh, while still
you know, because I did the map in what was so fair. It was so fair and I tried to explain we're a team. You know if we're a football team, don't tell me were playing football and I dont get.
To watch the score? If we add a station gimme a few more shekels, if we,
lose a station, take away a few shackles, but let what
I'm doing what we're doing be reflected and they basically conduct it was
basically slammed the door fuck you you know and
was really crazy. I don't know if I put this in the book, so I I just walk
out and in which the monday- and we always argued about whether we can take Columbus stay off, but they want to work on colombia.
they and we went away for the weekend to the city and Nancy was thrilled because up its such
hard job. It is so impossible honour on it in on a marriage on family people of our time, putting a framework
on people like you or or johnny
and so or people have these great jobs, but at a certain point go there is
threshold of where I am no longer happy get away. You know you, don't you think monies that
You know the solution, but a minute you have enough money. Another problem just goes up there
but we all of our price, I always say
If somebody offers made you wanna come to doing a show in alaska, I dont say no, I say or
Fifty thousand dollars and if they say ok, we'll pay, what the hell you bite, the bullet
I would go to stop just make it the sun, moon and ozone. Thousands fair size are so at the on Monday. We come back from the city and a message on the answering machine and are not at all
It's always sounds like I'm making step up as I remember it. The phone rings and I get a phone just as the little tape clicks on. So I got,
the first minute of the conversation and we haven't got to the pre fatten got to the meat of the conversation which is just priceless
these, the classic all jewish joke is. I need fifty dollars forty hours. What do you need? Thirty dollars for failure just so funny, so I answered
well jag, it's howard. What are you doing? Man? I need you you gotta come in said. Listen, howard is this. You know we are so far apart. You know we're really far apart. He goes how
I said, listen, you know, but we already done a little preamble, which aid up
tape soya, no evidence of it, I said, were part by sixty two
thousand five hundred dollars or I was coming
tomorrow, give you two fifty grand now it
six two thousand and five or two covenant I'll give you the sixty grin, is sick
They chose our I paid for them
two years every two weeks I gotta check from howard's company, making up the difference between korea and thirty seven and the four hundred, because he here
needed me and that that was not be maybe being shitty. That's an indication,
I was part of the pact,
to the show, I'm dyin, why
who do so well and and people call me
he's making billions and billions of dollars, and I asked for more money has got. The listless won't call me cheap, which is just as brilliance. You know what power tube and then the happen. You know, and I asked for more one of the greatest things I ever did from the very beginning. I want. I worked at NBC for three years for free one day a week, but he plugged me at the end of the show
Sometimes, georgia, Jackie, is the host a runs governance, comedy shop, blah blah blah, which was
invaluable to me and I'd ideas, comics to come on, the show at me, I still have comic sans. I can't believe I didn't go on. Howard stern show would because
I tell you wanna come on tuesday and stern, showed me and they take watch it pay. So what's it pay?
You got the entire trade state area here and you. What are you? Are you what is stupid, but you can't come. You know comic, so stupid.
colleagues show so that was so great
at some point. One of them was no negotiations, they wouldn't pay me where I wanted there will. I say I'll tell you what
I'll take such amount of money, but I want an extra plug and what he did
he'd, always plug me at the the shell, but sometimes the showing that a ten but usually was ten thirty or ten. Forty five or love
clock and you know: desert bears a curve at eight o clock.
Millions and millions and millions of people at eleven o clock showing you, those people out there jobs is that many people listening
I said I want an extra plug mid show and they gave that to me
so what I would do, as I would, if I'm working at a club or on a theme,
if I'm at the chicago theatre. On monday, I put up my plug at seven, forty five and on tuesday I put her up at eight fifteen, because all these everybody's in the car at different times, it's really smart and it was It- was the most brilliant brilliant marketing move. I had with him
also need a you know. What was your percentage like verses, road earnings versus stern excited I'd? Imagine you had to be making over a million dollars on the road in what I I never will doubt not now know ways.
yeah. I was you guys. You guys had such access to such a fan base.
That was so you guys
but I really didn't care. I know you never did the road like that. You know if I'd I'd do the chicago theater. I did that world a thick able people have
If people listen right now and understand-
like
right now. It seems that everyone's doing big venues when you
we're doing this and ninety ninety nine ninety seven. Ninety five,
no one was doing theatres, robin hood
just doing debtors. Probably
Polly rubber climbs doing debtors seinfeld was pride to in
right. So I wonder when small theatres, but not making the fifty thousand,
so whatever they get paid. When I was,
the really the highlight the
there might have been ninety ninety eight, where I work the huge room on the bottom for with to emerge
Hence video streams.
On either side like, like, you know, billy, Joel concert, and but I made ten grand we know
ten grand friday, ten grand saturday- and god knows it- was probably forty five dollars a person god. I was so thrilled
to get flown wind and dined, and you know when I worked the chicago theatre or the state theatre in Denver. I was making-
to me- was crazy money, but it wasn't crazy money, but why was it? Would the german agent
Now, let me I'd worry, rose garden. I had him for a while
but then re ramona went to the moon, so yeah, it's a long story
so I met Roy Roy's still in a one of my best friend, who is a very sweet guy him. He was very kind to me when I met him. Yeah he's his grace couple of those guys or who's the guy,
I remember the guy you who had a big with bob court of machine.
Written is really mozilla written sailors verse. My first lab my first album literally at an l, p call. What did you expect and the front of the album is my eighth grade class picture of you fucking
it? Don't give him the bird and on the back, is a picture me, leaning on a bar? If that camera had a pin three feet to the right rip machina was the bartender really at this gig that we booked in bethpage
nineteen early nineteenth century, the abandonment, nineteen, seventy eight, because we didn't have that weekly show yet and he became partners
the show that mean richie started at this little restaurant ruin three side comedy club and rick Messina became a partner and, I think,
He was one of the producers of comedy sturdiest dozen. I think that's the point at which you,
came to mowing amanda and they went to mow. Do have like her. I mean you quit drinking. I must have been
what's interesting, is you quit the stern show, and then you quit drinking like
two weeks later divorce. I took a couple enough
Where's the internet was rife with, but the
you lost your job Nancy,
have you any and all in all the stuff you know I know I was in in a quandary. You know like you, can't make an omelette without breaking eggs out. I just
Should have been happy, but it was I was so overworked and so crazy, but so hard to turn down a gig you for that.
Money you're here there and you know, and then me and you would not get along for very personal reasons, and people like you
really go into your nancy breakin up odd on the year. In the documentaries item on its it's supposed to be fun,
and people of enjoying the show, and they know we broke up. You don't need to know more than that. You know, and I would be glad
Explain to you. I just you know we were for all practical purposes, kind of broken up for the less,
probably three years we will cut whip men and how good friends for years before we started working,
whether now we working together and of course, we start fooling around then than she moved.
now we got married, so we were like you know. We had come from a really great.
and she now what she's like one of my best friends are me my girlfriend double day with her boy
and she's just delightful smart, driven jews
wonderful girl, we had we had problems.
But the reason we didn't get divorced because I'm working five days a week plus sometimes
tv shows wherever they were going away for a week. If I finally had a free weekend,
The first thing I want to do is look through a fucking bachelor party enjoy good cook, a hot
play it. I'm not goin anywhere, I'm enjoying my I'll shoot up, so we we literally didn't have time to break up.
And there was no way was doing the show. Somebody's gonna tell me you could work that hard all week and I'm not going to get drunk on friday or am not going to get drunk after my gigs. You know if somebody in night,
if, if summit in two thousand and one said you're not gonna, have a drink for twenty two days, I would allow
after that, like what are you? What do you mean? I announced twenty two years it's over twenty two years yet, but I'm off the shell.
I move into a house by myself. I quit drinking,
you don't have a job and I'm get
divorced all at this
time and they share. If you do any one of those you shouldn't walter
anything else in your life because it's gonna be so rocky saw. It was a little touch and go
crazy for I mean I was a little noddy, but beyond
social, probably shaved, my life. Do you couldn't get drunk you you gotta get up before thirty more. You can only do so much so often and so
while I was tamed, but now we are
nothing but free time and after a couple
I said, I cannot spend the rest of my life every day, waiting for it to be five o clock
start drink, and so the only solution is that would never be five o clock and then I,
Did it know if you didn't have the cheese and stuff you weren't a drunk all right, I wasn't a drunk, but what's what's that sub got a claim to fame? You know I had and people say it isn't. Our problem. Like we'll tell my wife tell my family, I got a friend. I think this is my book and it might have been in documentary. I got a friend whose mother was an alcohol counselor for the
decades, asian long retired- and she said you know, jack- had never really talk to you about your drinking problem.
I said you know, I've never really been able to to the finer put a finger out because
I never got up in the morning and had a shot of vodka
never sat and yankee game and drank beer and never shut
their work and on my jokes and drank you know,
look and she smiling
what are you smiling at you said any body
uses. The word never to describe the drinking is an alcoholic
That's what you said- and I was like
It's always stood cause, I'm I'm bragging about. When I didn't drink you know, and so
So who are know, that's pretty crazy, fuck yeah,
and showed me while I'm all I'm at the end of the street, they should use better. All the time
yeah. So it always lying. I never drink on stage and then you could bind a bunch of times on broadway stage. You know it just you know like I used to never drink on stage, but I would have a a budweiser bottle.
With water and only would lead the people into the sea like the full pied piper I drink, and then we went to sharp promoting heineken.
Our heineken bottle for water. Like the first night,
I went on stage, rascals hey, you know,
workshop. Why didn't you warn me
I mention the owner. Rather, as you said, we only have
four cases a heineken we shoulder out in the first half hour,
because when you hold up behind it can bottle that drinking with you
than Heineken owes you, because when they got the next night they get a drink,
or can go cause is still drinking with you, our drink water, I drink water and then
a girl so should before to stop the job. Men raymie alight beer source
when I get done with the show and she thought she dumped the joke. Bed I put down the Heineken bottle full of water and they give
the light beer showed to the audience. It looks like I'm down shifting from heineken to light beer, William, while having my first step and but I'd still manage to get pretty ploughed.
You know you know, because you don't want you
thought the engine. You know it's all launched woods. Did you just quit just like me
done, ordered you were meeting. Did you get an hour? I I
literally I quit on shore
good the mile not by design,
Just I didn't even know realize it. I was at a christening with Nancy and
it was kind of low rent and, at the end of the meeting
meal, or whatever it was
the ceremony and everybody's shit around a big round table. He had a coffee cup and the girl would come around with a pitcher of beer. That's how high classes was. I was. We were always the first people at the party or the wedding whatever to make
so we took full advantage of that cocktail hour and I was always at the end of it all.
for we went to sit at the table. I get a couple extra. You know that kind of
thank milena. I got to the point where I
You always stand there waiting wife waiting for your wife one day. I said because I know I couldn't couldn't start trigger till we got in the car, which sounds horrible bike.
Start triggered till we got the car what s it what's hold it, but so do the beard also theirs. I take it
working time pick. Sometimes that finish a beard. I'd I'd hide the empty;
and start a second beer just before
even got there.
so here we are distressing and I know
at some point. I know how to stop, because I wait too
a free time, but I was march April myself was like may so
was like two months of of having too much free time and waken up with a
you know waken up with a hang over unrealized europe. Job and new marriages break it up above a black and wishes
this christening in the girl, cameroon and literally had the coffee in the coffee, dispel pitcher and are left hand and,
beer thrilling and right hand and
beer was being poured into a war goblet. I push back the water goblet and pulled over my coffee cup and turned it over
We would have known she was like she sure, fuckin ghost she said. What are you doin? I said I'm done and no girl poured my coffee cup and
that was it until the first weekend I was sober, mean and nancy went for dinner, which
on issues that southern John Susanna went, the sunrise
restaurant, the city. I sit on
What do he'll give you fuck you fuck and drink and youtube would mean you're, not drunk you drink any,
the guy in my life, the peer pressure me
next thing. I know me and John, and these two beautiful women are ride, neuron central power,
work a handsome cab with a six pack in a paper bag. You not blank and just so wrong.
But you know what that is. That was the only little slide I had back and anna. Then it's been over twenty two years. As was agreed, there is what we'd again please
Of course, all the people in a while. You not strawberries, no small part, I'm fucking
there's no rules. Of course. I smoke pot. If I feel like it, I lost my part. If I don't feel like it. Sometimes I go along carbon out. Small good I'd be grown for twenty two years, both him and I just give away you know
you have your own rules, you know
the worst thing about pod is. It could lucian up so you take a drink, but that's never happened there. You know and dumb and
It's really weird. I mean people at quit. Drink at every has a story. When you first stop drinking
I didn't go anywhere for, like I guess might have been a week or two weeks because I feel like I can't go somewhere. If I walk into a bar people like you,
posture. What are you doin here you not drinking get out of here. You don't realize it. Nobody gives a shit about. You know they noticed. I also like someone was talking about that.
With me someone who is a guy
sober moves on toward me in I drink a lot and
he's I feel so weird not rank in or out you around you and us. I don't give a fuck if you drink, I dont notice. If you ever drinking your hand and not all I care about, is me, I've got you,
number, you think you think I'm a cadet he's not fucked up enough. This is a bad, so lonely absolute unthinking. Everybody knows so. I said you know what I just said: anybody could stay
home and stay sober. I gotta go out and you got to a bar and you get a glass a tonne
I heard a stir in it. Nobody knows you not drink
nobody cares and they watched their that drinking tea
can somebody else. Then it's working to me for a half an hour and not even take us.
Supper. The Emily, I want to say, are you gonna, fuckin drink that are not hedge on your somebody's gotta, drink and
and you realize it. It just doesn't matter to anybody else now known as a whole at ets, as obvious is that should
be it is it and nobody can
here's your everybody says is ok.
Drink and funny dinner. I really like what do you know
family by whole family. There, all crazy dregs, we're all crazy drinkers, a near where I just.
in Egypt. You don't even I don't even deal with it, cause it's not an issue. I don't think about it. My wife's, the only one like I I'm not drinking right now and the first night I
you mean this afternoon or blow. Who knows
happened tonight what you may get taken it light time normal. I'm just I've been trying to lose weight. So my bible thing is my fucking.
Wait my weight as I've gotten so out of control anna surrounding it and country
my way? There's no way to do that. Would drinking from me drinking opens
gate to all the fuckin just
destroying pizza and and just like the little things I am weird about t totalling. I can
either follow a strict set of rules or I can just do whatever the fuck. I want it's, it's so hard to do it halfway. You know, yeah. You know that that's a problem with pot cause, I smoke pot and I'm
about your. I taught me. I should listen Jackie, you could small part which can only
more particularly the cookies and only the ice.
When I try to make a deal it myself and sobbed
I just got away with a job time to adults. Sometimes I smoke pot and say fuck, you, jackie, I'm having a cookie. You know which, which is
the low battles lose away,
is just so far. We went through her. We want to play and I ate some edibles and the began after your play. It was always beetle juice, Anna, the opening
Well bet he does is about how everyone's going to die and you can't stop it and I start having a panic attack and I ate an entire bag of skittles, like the big bag of skittles ate the whole bag of skittles, and I was like just because you're upset. I looked at the calories, I think it's at eight hundred on the bag and I was like I don't even want to see how many servings that is, but, like I ate a whole fucking bag of skittles. I
get out of control and marrow on the arm, but I'm weird about like mount the first night I didn't drink, my fucking wife, porter glass of wine. She never drinks, I go.
the fuck. Are you doing you? I'm always the only one drinking never wondering just drinking good wine.
and then the next page made it a signature cocktail. The foot
You do lads seated but
it's I mean that's that shit. You know, howard, never drank ever not a drop, maybe maybe in college or wherever he never drank a drop.
until I left the shell and then you start drinking wine with his new wife and and going out and now honey. Is that what cause he never ever sat and had?
beer he didn't like red or gary did howard.
hang on after the show? Go? Let's go to teach you have right is say that again did howard stern.
in two years that was never wow.
This has been a good year, we're number one or that what a great five years we picked up twenty markets, let's all go out to dinner, was never any kind of this, not even that the few pictures of us
together are so rare. This picture from way when we played softball
w n b at shade
stadium. But it was city field me how
robin gary and fred with art and be she uniforms altogether
then, when we got to see the channel nine show, the girl was the thea, the police, publicity person,
if we didn't get the memo source Genji
Urge us together and
The publicity shot of the fibre
wash and gary is even wear an eye. Stomp Jackie, the joke man d shirt and you can read on howard's face that he's not happy about this, because this is his show and here's what what this girl perceived to be. The show
which was accurate. Here's the shop, but there is no no group shots that no ever
it's all go out and celebrate or lets you know or even ned pats on the, but it just did not exist.
It's interesting. I would wish when someone dies, their therapists could write a book about them.
To read howard's over it out up to read an honest version of how
just the same way. They did it jordan, but when they tat, be jordan, talk about him and I think it's because everyone seriously could
a fuck jordan couldn't affect them anymore and they will
Oh, he was a fuckin lunatic like he was a demos competitive.
Person you'd ever meet? He would fight with you and brought like when they did the documentary on numb. I guess was on the us
anne, but when they did a documentary on him I would lie.
to know because howard is, is kind of tight lipped, but would love to know what made him
I gotta get his heart of hearts. What was what story or stories
Was he telling howard? You know what was
our telling howard, what what you know
well. I don't want to give Jackie more money. I don't wanna give Fred more credit. I don't want it
do this, I don't want you know, but ninety nine
in point nine percent of the school,
we were so on the money. You know,
he hated. Johnny Carson. I would bet dollars the dominance. Of course she didn't know Johnny Carson,
he hated Johnny Carson, because every
body else loved, johnny, Carson and now was the rub. You know you know what to say:
This is this is so wrong, but so funny when pee we first went the mornings in new york. I once again
I say we how its whole thing was that he fought in vietnam, which have
Do the math. He was like three us all and need told everybody here
half a in and have jewish, because wove well known.
See their tion or jewish, or have retired and have george whatever made total sense riah, and when we first
the mornings in new york. Nobody knew anything it was. It was like I hear
the rumor robins black zat possible is robin. But you know people really didn't know, and it was wasn't the first day a minute. It was the one
got out or whatever, so I'm playing a stump. The joke may have had the shuttles comedy club, and this is real early. Like you know, we ve been warnings, just for
while you don't have the guy stand up and ask the questions and undergo stood up and says
judge, I get asked a question. A luxury said, sir, is how
but really have jewish said. Yes, he said what
the other day I will I said, even
would you be in my business. They had lived ever, which is so wrong garden, a place where just bizarre, if you know what you just do, but you know we, let's wait,
I want to talk to you about. Oh, I don't like you too long by wanna talk to you about listen. I got no way to go on trying to keep you from drinking in the eu to keep you out of the fund,
refrigerator and the wine shell about museum hookah. What what do you? What do you thought about open water swimming.
Look you swim and use based in one of the big things in the in the darkness,
how you like to get out the waters swim, I'm a poor kid
from the north shore of nassau county on long island. I never had a pool
yeah my whole life from the time I can
imagine being alive. My air lib,
really a stone's throw from where I live. Now. Ok, you shall ever
We got my entire life, my uncles and my uncle Clem, and my any that lived on monroe avenue, which is one, but it's called the present, this assistance with present streets in baby. I never could talk about this on a genuine if people who, in a line which were now I dont care, you know, but it's called the president's streets monroe washing.
Ten adams- I live on Quincy. There is the whole precedent quincy, whatever fuckin idiot, make the president's three so armand quincy and my answer
on monroe and every week in my aunt and my mother would take me and my cousin and my brother and then as the kids more kids came along and we would
spend, but survey and sunday on the beach and the uncles would shit
watch the yankees and drink beer or booze?
my great uncle led was a huge politics.
Who is literally the nash.
chairman of the republican club.
He was eisenhower's campaign manager and fifty two and fifty six
so he was always on meat, the press, so here's the three uncles or for three uncles get drunk
switch in between the yankees and meet the press and get drunk or just it storybook riah. So I was on that beach all the time.
But that's where I always swam. We didn't have a pool and I live for
always loved that and now I'm literally twenty,
seconds from there and an eye,
If she loves, I like swimming, it's just so relaxing it's not weird about me. Is that like? Oh? No, I love it. I love it to look lovely my wife's, a big. My wife grew up on a a grew up in the on a lake technically and the shadowy grown up the bay used to go to every
again and she, my wife, we'll just swim
into an end like I have a healthy fear of
open water. Just I grew up on an ocean, and so I understand them
stations. I understand
That's a little bit. Scarier mileage will swim out deepest fuck
and just sit there in the water and float
swim back in june
my daughters daughter's like that to know, but it's so interesting and such an inch.
in part of you that I would have never thought
I just mean you know you never think of like how people
after exercise or or like or get out.
active and in the fact that you swim. I just thought that so sort of all you know. Sometimes I jump out about at seven in the morning. Sometime
I know me and barbara can have tea and toes first said diamond second cup of tea and I still
I still revel in not gettin up at four thirty island.
I to this day I look at the clock and it says eight o'clock and I'm like oh I'd, already be working for two hours and all- and I swim this big loop and I just love it and if it's and if it's raining
or if it's a little robbed and some mornings it's like a pond, and I and I got no
south to a shower. She took a long swam and then a nice hot outpost shower I come home, like I told the in one thing, the word I'm not
shamelessly plug in my documentary, a joke man that's available on amazon and itunes, but on in the in the documentary we spend a whole day. You know he comes with me in in the car to do a gig in south. The south filled that shell
Josie right near philadelphia and it's a long ride. We do this.
Bang amnesia shoots bulge shows and where they get the whole day, we're gonna great story view, but then we get home.
When I come home from a gig in the summer or in the october, a start and whatever the water is reasonable. That's how I and my night I strip naked, I put on my bathrobe, I go down, should
of my beard, tobin, gopher, nice, lung swim! That's how I
and my knights, whether I get home and eleven twelve one too. Sometimes I'm coming home from Boston. I get on it for because you gulf that swim.
And take a hot shower! You sleep like a baby s. I hope people don't think that we stage me
go on for a swim at the end,
the day. I looked very it looked very organic and- and I
stand that I have a
or plunge like swipe love coldwater. So to this morning
did two sessions of the added sauna polar blunt sonaput punch,
the poor punch here, a love, getting a polar plunge, new had that cold, yeah I'll, take us out of thirty
or ass. You know I'd die, did the tenth street bears in new york
and I've been to those yeah, they beat you with the the birch Bayh birch branches, and then you jump at the ice cold war. I mean for years when I was going there, there was to celebrity or semi celebrities. There was my eight by ten.
John AMOS equipment, saudi about what a cat
I bet that one a number of times. I love that one, that's great and the old, the you know the old jewish bandits. They they're built light ride day with that lang and sacha each other yeah. I love that net, the polar plunge there is ice cold.
but I love getting in a poor punch at the end of the day and then taken up even
which our I tell you. If you want to feel
a millionaire gettin out or shall I I tell people out you don't we?
an answer went out: fred norse and his wife. I mind I ve been his wife. Had he render the house in.
Gadget now. Now he shot a house out there forever, but they'd rent a house for a couple weeks, and nobody knew that me and Nancy would go out and spend a weekend with Fred nelson cause. I knew the whole time and shall be what fred like? What do you do? What rubino then and yeah? He was my buddy, so it was hush hush. You know not not severe,
simply soldiers it. None are you fucking business type thing, but they re a place, went out to a shower and I was like it doesn't.
Hey below this, I don't know why. It's not it's a she it's a shower. What is the difference? I fucking kiss our inside me more edge. I only shower outdoors. My parents came over
They with us for a week and my dad said something I said I savant use my outdoor shower,
it's off to that site. Where, where were my Jim is made
I dunno about that. I got completely private normalcy. One will see people think you're weird, it's so fucking
easier, it's easier outside its more,
joyful, especially at night, when it's a little cold and the world
warms you. It is the greatest feeling I've ever had, first,
I just wish our ever had was at my at our on our honeymoon, and I said to my wife, and it was wide open in the treetops. Am I said to my wife, omg I'm getting an outdoor shower like we will
I have an aftershock. We have an outdoor shower here too, but I'm not allowed to shower with a bunch of women but
here, I would not enough said he I get
yeah little legs into degas, apparently they're going to kill anybody, fainting yeah yeah, exactly just wait. How did you meet mark cuban? Oh okay, we'll get to that? Let me tell you where would I want to tell you one story? First tour, so it it's so great to have stuff that just happens,
that shows up in the dark. It's terrific aren't. We want to get already lange in the dock and is hard to meet up with people. In was trying to especially artes trying to connect, but already,
never connected. But already I mean woolly nelson was fully into during the year to coordinate,
so we could shoot. A may well have been exchanged. Dirty jobs for twenty years were like pals, not not yok around palace, but power
nonetheless, because he loves darted jokes as much as I do, but that took a year so already wants to do the documentary
that's in trouble, he's in jail he's in the hospital he's in rio. The dock in theory took
god. Damn long to get done that
it was cleaned up at rehab and out in the document
was done so we got. The interview gives us great. So we do
this too shows and south georgia wherever we get in
car to come home, he takes the video camera and puts it in the back. She puts it away and put in the back seat
And were driving home jersey turned back in the farm rings, hello jack
Its flouts to mark Baum enlisted men were on the role that we together door in everybody's club.
The walls were in Kansas city, I'm here with the council's, enjoy from bad finger and the whole gang is
we. I said you know what I call Mart lay one. I just call marveling sombre but john to speak of foam and he puts van der spiegel phone.
I blew them away for fifteen minutes and it can hear the fuckers, laughin and squealing. Imagine having that spontaneous
is what the cameras at the fucking like. So you win some you lose some. You know, oh so so I'm working so hard that I'm going to chicago or I'm going to Boston, because the pay me really well yeah I mean like. I forget the fact is fun. I'm getting
I think getting hot. You know it. It's such a joy and it's so hard physically, it's hard to wait. You know, if you don't. I might start my dead, nine, I'm starting to that for sure. You know what
so we have seen to all these places, so we syndicated to Dallas. I dont know more cuban
Furthermore, cuban I guess he had already made his millions or
millions in california and the
eyes call me from Dallas norman.
And of his name, but I wouldn't know his name anyway, jack
Here we are such huge fans, man. We can't believe the stern shows on here in Dallas. Would it's really huge without a new company gone called audio net dot com and we really want a cloud.
Do a promotion. We got no money, you know it's a start up. We got no money, but will give you a promotion and what it was
was more cuban went to, I guess, was a hoosier and want to
Is that Indiana stayed wherever does anyone people that you wanted himself and people to be able here
the college baseball games on the internet. Now, if your member long enough about the internet was just tat,
the air and then all of a sudden. It was the world wide web that look so much better, and then
pictures were added, which was a whole nother level and then sound was going to be added so cubans.
the cutting edge of this and he wants to have the india.
a state or whatever college baseball games. You want those wants us to play on audio net dot com and they they said. We want
you'd help should listen. I can't come out there. I said I'll, tell you what I do, but the one on
Send you a bunch of my stop and you do whatever you want with it.
I sent them everything I had, which I dont know what it was: biddy tapes cosette tapes
The other thing I had even cds yet because it would be a thick, was ninety three like they should look up the exact date you but
What are you on? The internet was brand new. It was a whole do. It seems
like a no brainer now, but there was a whole nor the level of costs, so much more bandwidth for a picture and so much bandwidth for for audio and forget about the bed with for video. You know that was so. It was a slow, gradual thing,
but now it's ridiculous because you carry the rim, one, the one email you saw, so they take all my.
soft and made a six, our endless loop and I guess, had a button on audio net dot com. So few listen
the college baseball game is half time. The college kids could push the button, india, Jackie's, dick jokes
like, but I never heard I never heard anything from it. They they fit promoting made that talking about me. So,
was great for me. Then they had me on the website or whatever.
Couple years later I see broadcast
start com cells for four billion dollars? That's enough broadcast
dot com, formerly audio.
bud com sold by you. Don't entrepreneur marked you would where I'm like? While you know won't, you know, but he
cops to that end,
job you see he did in the document and the us are funny because howard got him on the show. After I was gone and and mercosur in each of the sun, this peace, a videotape. I didn't you
Of course I couldn't use it because howard, I gotta. I gotta give credit to your guy jackie here. You know without him he really helped me. You know when we needed when we needed to content
boy, Jackie israeli sacks goes. That's that Jackie, that's fred, Jackie's, that
Is it well when, when jack
was fred. You know
joke about it. But then I asked him to the to the little piece of
rio where the nuts cassettes
wanna, let feel it I make up
I should like ours? A kind word last january was the one where I was they wait. I once you known Sean young, we did a movie together, we
If really well, you know she's a wacko and she's great in rachel. Do you know rachel? Do you know why italians wear gold chains, so they know where to stop shaving. Is my favorite my face the fate my favorite thing about you like I could I could
dive the stern experience. The the put the justified
can kennison the broad me
all that I so I had no idea what to expect
The idea of you are going to know who I was or, if you're going to say now, you're a guy that tells Joe, you really think that's fuckin comedy I didn't know.
you don't know about everything about you. Didn't you about you. Everything about. You is the jokes, but everything about you is that I am
Paraphrasing and correct me if I'm wrong, but you believe the georgia for us, and so you believe and asked the boy
many of the show I was like I, if I don't get you to tell me some jokes to Chris.
What do you guys come over here, so we can set in
and jack, you just tell us some jokes. I will tell us you're jealous whatever
You feel like you're, your top, you top favorite. Why
can't you do you know like Michael, whose of your favorite the pieces ass in your life. You know you came alive right you. I owe our that stock answer entwined silver here, I'll tell you one modern sagas, a high school problem and the next stages
your mother text in others know, I'm baddest remind the problem was great, but now I'm at the beach mom and a freak out I got common. My hair for mother sends a beggar text honey where the promise great
listen sometimes when you're blown a guy and he decides
What's a sure is one on your face and a anxious.
at the amount they can't really control. With that
of course. Sometimes something goes in your air, but it's not a big deal. Just go,
water and it'll watch right out.
She said some other back attacks, mom pace with information, but I meant
I come back class does grape it's it's bankers
any joke. I know you already know the punchline too. Well, if doctors
I have good news and bad news your wife's spent in an accident. Ah they that's already fifteen different jobs. Are you the bait? The drivers
the bad news is you're going to have to she's paralyzed you're, going to have to cook and clean for and take care of her for the rest of your life wipers.
ass. It's gonna be an ongoing process day in day out she's dead.
That word or I was only kidding you know, is one of the thing whereby the guy's wife is missing. They they say hey.
I come to the door and say: listen or you know we found your wife, you know we're trawling it.
troll trolling in the bay and we pulled her up and she had drowned and we're like lobsters and crabs. You know clipped onto her body and it's really disgusting mess of what should we do
and he said to give me the lobsters and crabs and reset the trap. Yeah, who alleged the best wife joke of all time is the wife says: get the fuck out get the fuck out as her husband walked up the torch
I hope you ll die a slow, painful death. So now you want me to stay by law.
You know, I love bordeaux, don't love all them! It's the best thing
I was in college one I am my body came in and we had we,
and he said: hey, let's just get high and just tell it
the street jokes.
One is that a joke book
and we are high and we laughed good joke, there's something to it.
His justice, so it it it's pure. It's it's pure. The greatest compliment I ever got. I was doing a show at the show, with a bunch of us at the friars club, in a little in the dining room that you know, small, not tiny, but it just
dining room and world and I'm I go on stage and I got jerry stiller and in the mirror and an mirror shitting on my feet. Yeah, which is intimidating, mean he's beyond fuckin brilliant and he always was- and this might even be before sign for whatever but I'm killer in on you. You don't know whether he's jerking off because he's leavened I got done. He said you know. I can't believe how much I enjoyed your act. Those
Should you realize you jokes there, each like a small one act play nor this a little premise and this distinct characters and there's an ending and I was like I got. The children was like the finest
like a compliment if they would like, if you will forgive voting man, you know who I was really interesting and I was very cool the fuckin best jackie.
Can best. Thank calls it downloads stock. I got diarrhoea. Can I take a bath
has it been got enough
good?
I am wearing out my while. No, no, no, no, no, no you're the best
I love you I
everyone should check out you documentary check out your book. The joke man is,
maybe the documentaries named the book also right name in the book is the joke. Man bout, a stern! You cannot just go bow to stern cause.
You got it back with a stern. You get a seven
rage sailing manual.
Allow the job man bout a start, but the better. The documentary is called joke. Man.
its oil and it's all a thrill bills, awesome and everyone that mrs pack, s nose.
Suddenly, when I get a piece of content for someone to promote a dry, read it or watch, it
just gonna watch beginning in the girl. I got it, but I
through watched, your entire documentary in one setting an absolute loved it you're such a huge part of
My journey into where I am today with with from comedy to radio to podcasting, so to get down to
down with you is a real honour. I you know I love
I mean already already language to come with me.
friends. The rascals laugh at most
majority loves you and I and its it shows.
one thing that shows in that documentary is that everyone loves you and I guarantee you. I guarantee you that I'll, let me know whatever I think an extern does too I I wonder he has to what his reaction will be. Seeing this
ill because nobody talks at a school they, but it don't mind me saying that I am right in the jokes somebody wrote me an email said how funny is at the howard spent all this money and time on psychiatrists. So they could talk about that
the fact that it wasn't you making him funny, which is so unfair, but it just made me laugh, you know yeah! No, I think I think I have it doesn't sound like if I get to,
If I get to be where you are today, I'd be a very happy. Man seems like you in there
One thing I left the documentary with- and this is the one thing I was dealing with- two
morning like how do I do my writing every morning and I try to have one original thought than work on that fought and
my one thought my one words. They was surrender a why I just said
Could I surrender to everything and looks a little bit of a control freak.
Curse, render everything. Let anything happen to me and you
smile, and, unlike my wife, doesn't smile and let things happen to me and be like
with where I am and good, where I go and just be like
because I used to be that guy and now I'm this guy
I really microbes.
Energy and I looked at your dark and I went he seems like somebody's really falcon happy. Thank you. Thank you
yeah? This episode
Transcript generated on 2023-09-21.