Today, I sit down with comedian, Orny Adams. We talk about having FOBI, what to bring to a party, the Seinfeld documentary, Adidas, and much more!
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Hey guys brand new
gasped in my movie. The mission will be in theatres memorial day. We can move of the mission.
It will be impetus memorial day. We can, you will hear me say that a thousand times
my movie. The machine will be only in
hitters memorial day week and I will see you at the movies tops offworld door were back in the: u s: baby williams, paupers, pennsylvania february, second february. Third, her she pencil
mania, Boston, a tv gardens is sold out. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Boston bang remain.
Happier as honour without into force should be wary of so many there for good.
For every night february, ten february, eleventh at the mullet arena
Savannah Georgia, the next weekend tampa afforded the Emily centre. The neighbours are banned,
me and will anyway tamper florida.
Orlando cedar rapids green bay, minneapolis grant forks fargo, I'm bringing in back with me to win a peg saskatoon edmonton calgary cologne,
bismarck sioux falls ass cars, where
I'm bringing, I think, we're doing. Oshkosh peoria rockford then augusta georgia to blow mississippi bows your city
a jonesboro charles charleston,
access to detroit and enclosing out the. U s leg at the store
cleveland ohio at the rocket morgiana mortgage center. I have my full terror ways I will be wearing them.
Going into new zealand in April. Seventeenth, wow, that's a quick turnaround.
Camera, tiara, maneuvers, eland melbourne towards will perth brisbane sidney on the twenty. Ninth. Today's guest is a guy who after
Probably, as long as I stand up, he was one of the guys he had. It was he's in the class above me
but ass being the same age. You started when he was younger than me, and so he was already working
comic in new york. When we got there, he has two specials more than loud and takes the third there.
This phenomenon is extremely tiled to stand up and I think he's finally getting is do his special
are blowing up on youtube. You can find them both on youtube,
name is Ernie Adams. He has a awesome,
You'd give em a watch, leave a comment. I think only with love
for me to say to him, if you can there's theirs
by getting give money on youtube now, but, more importantly, find them on tour. He is a phenomenal comic.
you go watch him. You will have a good time. You will laugh your fucking ass off
Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado my friend stanhope comedian-
Arnie items it is, it is the worst part
it will show you could have is nears is absolutely essential.
if you're on stage?
I say I know I'm not on stage for the countdown. Oh, I forgot you ve green eyes,
you well, you have a lot of green antonina, just flew by like watch, and I saw it as a green face now, as I like into the boat cream, and then I just got us for a christian
ass whew. How ok I have! I have a of. We started the balkans where we started out with it new year's eve. Don't ok this? Why mps paper
Never remember that new year's eve sucks
I always make the mistake about this down stage. Until the nears I get off
done I'm gone from the fund selling march twenty five. I got the then move cure.
go in itself like that. It's just that it's a disaster, I'm doing it because
here's here's what I say to my team are all.
new year's if it's a shit, tawny other eyes, all
I sit at home on the couch by myself, I'm not going to have plants no matter what yeah I'm not
going out. I'm not going to go to a party, god forbid,
We invite me to a poor lass yard,
invited to a party new year's eve. I don't wanna go rich people up in the hills right there
may I say I think I'm safe saying this. Can I bring something? What's what's the proper answer, europe
which oh no don't worry about it? We got to everything's covered just ingest, it maybe bring a six pack of beer or something ok, they don't even eat.
We need that now. I and I don't want to be there. I don't want to get what I want to people like.
having plans. They did,
fear missing out. Like me, I have ultimate foma. I have hard core foma to the point where, if
My family's coming over at four o clock and I'm in the dim at three fifty seven, I'm looking at my watch watching by through sixty
second, they come here my work out over because I
have such foam
It is sad, I'm the opposite. I have so be, which is fear of being included like I don't want to go to your party. I don't want to go to your wedding
to see your joy, I got a lot to be had hoped the whole time on their part. This is what's gonna. Do I first of all
say something that's going to piss somebody off and that's going to keep me up all night right, I'm going to without a doubt screw this up. I don't want to do what I don't need that feeling later, also
I'm also. Are you the kind of person that lays in bed the next day goes. I fuck that up big time yet and I call ten different people to confirm my fucking.
the thinking, somebody's gonna side with me? They ve never side. However, sides with me now there was a view or out of control. Last night yeah apparently grow.
The virus isn't real one night I was like. I don't believe in it. I give up on rules about all the fucking rules. Logan tried talking real, keep going yeah, so I yeah so I've. I I have a fear of being included. I just I don't. I don't need to
be the show they're like come on. You know everybody is going to be a small grippy. Fawn it'll be fun, so I just want to stay home and watch ninety day fiance, because I wish I had something on tv to watch that I that I don't have that warm blanket of a book. For me it would be
I'll call be a common open about the wine and just sit on my phone right. Why did I?
once I was in what was it some like india
when there was like a snow storm and die
treated myself, I was making a lot of money in those days and still not, but I bought
I spotted bottle of champagne for myself and I go back to the hotel room and
I'm smoking. A I passed out smoking a cigar in holding a bottle
shipping watching cops, and I thought this is
What's going to happen. This is how I'm going to go. How great would that be by die? That way, so I go to my truck. Can I brings the the answer's? No
we're rich. Maybe they got a house with it with me,
but we want to bring in office chair, but what am I gonna break? Bring? They say that ultimate thing to bring is breakfast next morning someone.
That's not your bring something Brigham bangles gazette. No one ever thinks about the next day who keep on
so I interrupting interrupt. You know I love you, I love so they said ready for this
Could you actually could you bring ice ice
that's the lowest forms a bring something the biggest
When the nobody says nothing says we don't trust you to bring an appetizer or does bring ice
Will you want me to watch the cars too? It's too early to show up with the bags of ice. You gotta be there early, because everyone wants a go drink and you got what I mean you can't just show, but ten pounds of ice you gotta come in with at least forty pounds of ice know they need ice and now you're covered in punk and ice. Your hands are cold, you're exhausted and it's new year's eve show the first seven eleven you go to they're out now you gotta go in and get the map this out. You have to have like contingency backup plans. This was an operation and then the end of the party comes in everyone's congratulating everybody for what they brought like, who brought the jar to the decoder, a board who brought the meeting
he's platter, thoroughgoing they look at all. I would like to congratulate each other who brought the three layer definite getting argued like guilty. Anybody notice I added an extra layer and watching this and now I'm drunk and I'm pissed off, and so we can go.
For a second- and I just I went right into the middle of the room away. Ah scares me did duck everyone
ensure their cold drink tonight.
it didn't just appear those cops. Somebody had to go to three seven elevens.
nobody wants another story. How rich are these people that they do not like?
fifteen million dollar house who, throughout makers the I don't eat. You know maybe
it was broken. Maybe they were expecting more because the data doesn't catering. Have I I'll tell you right now: if anyone listening the best gift you can give yourself is find a good ice delivery guy. If I slip
You guys have, nor. How would ice is fucking off
but causing them to walk.
are you in need of more ice than I was I'm big ice guy and more in our old house. We didn't have and I are ice maker broke, and so I would stockpile ice. I would do ice cooler, I'm big ice, skater yeah. I would do polar plunges in a tub of so I get three hundred pounds of ice like once a week and then I'd put I'd. I fill up everything all the freezers got ice. I top off all the freezers
nice. I take bags of ice to keep them in coolers, yeah and then, and then I do my polar plunge then use that ice throughout the week and cover it and and
why do you said you'd use it for like drinks or necessity or drinking? I think of a you know: ice water. Like oh shit. This was around birds balls. Two days ago I love cold
I love co. Beverages like I am so glad to see that an ice make round here and an icebreaker in there.
It was like my one tree to myself was, like my wife got two dishwashers, and so she was like that way. You know they ve never gets right, there's never dishes and sank right in europe,
If the party are always doing dishes. I was like oh and ice makers and she almost bought me the same one. I said no, I want different times ice. Dude I've been taking ice on that one and I it's that one's popcorn ice yeah. When I put my cup in there and then I pack it down real tight,
and poor whisky over it ha? What point of the podcast do we get to that half fuck? What what first one
fact that you know the different names of the ice, I'm fucking, it's I mean not just says a lot. I mean you ve got a problem, the problem of a problem of drinking in general, but I will probably come. I'm workin on two beverages right now: you're a drink water like crazy.
Drink water, so fuckin about its great by only drink it. Out of these. That would definitely guy, I think, as a deliberate method. But what is this liquid dat like? Why is wander liquid debt like? Why would you ever as your checking it and perhaps about to die? Why
you ever unduly aunt. I adds a liquid death. I just don't get the name like you.
I don't, get it either like edgy water, when I say what
studies waters are bad ass. You want a drink like what we don't have he's been grape
ramming his mother's I've been trying to get it off the counters who moms are like a guinea to get
Is this your water? Oh, I didn't
I'm sorry, I don't know it would get. Well, I'm up! I'm about our work with a company. I've been out early,
scupper of liquid death
through you, know, Colleen funnybone,
for her son yeah. Her son works for liquid dafoe cool, and so he brought me some when I was in san francisco and left it on a bus and at first I was like what a silly.
Okay, so there I wasn't so wrong was I I was like I'll, never drink this water, but it's sparkling water and we making double chitosan sodas. So, like all use a sparkling water tribe, we went through the sparkling water and then one day, I'm home and my aunt, my old house them thirsty,
and I think it was during the pandemic and I started drinking water like crazy. I got really hydrated letter my blood pressure. My blood pressure was really good,
think it's always high, because zombie hydrated, and so I started.
going. Oh you know it's super easy I'll grab a case put by my met, my recliner and I'll just drink six waters throughout the night yeah and then get hydrated, and I thought- and it was just because I can drink it fast. I like mma, but but the markings,
great because moms are tracking of aachen, tipper gore type moms or want what liquid deaf off eventually come up with that name tipper gorge,
he's been my go to lobby for making rules. Can I remember she was one that want to end up anyway and album cuba to be pulled off the shelf in those years. Yeah skipper gore. Ah tippit was typical
Al gore's, why should it not be can still be together? Of course they are those who live there
get divorce. If it's not good for business and politics and she passed now she's, not the hulk window.
Explain to me the drinking, so I can understand it because I'm not I'm not. I love to drink the fact
summer I rediscovered the gin and tonic. Oh, what a great beverage can I tell
What makes the gin and tonic show great. Please it gets better.
as the ice smelt she it, because it's the only drink that gets better you're like when they come,
this oil obey look just touched agenda. Let's get straw to get good.
and take the limes out of I make my new and I leave the old times and lime graveyard. All I got into like by all different tonics and trying it and go with different gene
and research? I love mum. I have two thoughts of jenin tonic. My first thought was when what we first, I georgia.
But eighteen years ago, yes, in june member nineteen years ago,
My sister worked a fox and on an abode, my sister's moved out. There lived in like a like right right of pico. I think that's bad out there, not by fox
And on Monday nights lemme get a tennis and
image was baby. I didn't know what the fuck to do with her and I'd come home Monday morning, I'd be drunk from flying home, and so I
over. My sister's house and we'd girl out and we make dinner, and I would drink jenin tonics and mice.
and they were thought
damage or so fuckin go we're gonna gin. I always go beefeater, so you do it
recital b feeders and
and by the end of pouring
little town, again, yeah
and then you know you always run out of the tonic before the gym I go diatonic to oh, I do I'm a whore retire now me and mine, but my money get an aftertaste. If it's dire a love it my buddy Ben,
Liquid death tonic water, never make it then
They sure sure they sure I taught one of such an interesting thing. I dont like tonic water, except with Jim. I care bobcat tonic. We had never kick.
I'd like the tonic water people to explain to me why it so
spencer,
I have a little camp, the city crappy six ounce ones. The sixth was at five, ninety nine. What what is tonic? What is in tonic? It's just it's soda- is carbonated soft drink with quinn at quinn and on your quintana
you know they put in winter night. It's bullshit is what it is and they got some splain did they can
Maybe in the people who makes a liquid get, what is it
time? One time, one of the worst experience I ever had marijuana. I was at my buddy caymans house
we are high and I was there. I had caught mouth and I was an austrian- have a little bit of a panic attack and I went downstairs to his fridge and I grab what I thought was soda water, open
and I found it and it was tonic ruined the taste of my mouth,
the wretched tonic water without gin
is sought is gearing up my death, my dad likes tonic water. What the fuck, what
quit him, I couldn't nine is of medication used to treat malaria and that bad
say: you're, always on the cure for covert sonata
treatment of malaria. Due to play
modem fell,
apart from this is that is really
center chloric, when no common side effects
quintin. I am ringing in the ears, vision, issues and sweating. All things have happened when I drink first isolated, first isolated in eighteen, twenty from the bark of the chin shown a tree which is native to where rue peru, everybody ooh yeah. That's fucking
the jesuit missionaries, a member at my buddy Ben seeber. One
We a college and goes he goes let's get drunk tonight.
With everything going on and I was like well there's nothing going on. He was like nah, let's just me and you go to a liquor store and buy ingredients to a drink. We've never had
Let's make those drinks and see I mean their big ought to be good at everyone likes them right, so the first one we bought was gin and tonics. I'd never had a gin and tonic
It was pike. Twenty two yeah we just never had one without the gin and tonics
interesting drink because you don't really like no one's in high school
sneaking jenin products? It's such a good drink. Your dad would have
We all see I right after around it and its yeah and an fuckin, then next you know
We were drinking gin and tonics all night playing pool getting fucking blitzed obliterated the next night we did. We were like, let's get drunk again, that was so much fun and we tried to make martinis
and we could not figure out the mix. Actually I doubt it. I don't see gin and tonic as a you get shit faced kind of trick. You never hear people say I'm hung over when the ginetta. I see the real and tonic people as like the James bond crowd that know how to control the liquor.
Take the war. You know, pusher
hydrated gotten down arrogant atomic is an irresponsible drink. It's an afternoon
drink it is something we shall begin
I can in everyone goes like.
One denies agenda time. Yeah do you know. I have a theory and I'd like this to end up on that the queue nine wikipedia page.
Site me. This could be the source, I'm pretty sure. Q nine kills. The hang over.
You see your face. The way you just
one love. I like cheetos, like a meme right in front of the cheat codes like that, can be found out that you don't get hung wrong on gin and tonics.
No but drinks. Do you have your price? You seem like seminars to, yes,
and then you go all that was good for me. Sometimes I don't like finish the second one just to show the table, I'm not an alcoholic murmured. Then I got home and found it. We can't drink. Do you drink by beulah by yourself? Okay, I do but here's the thing I am an unbelievable drunk, I'm like fun like every
I'm I'm drunk. I think I have ever seen. You drop
First, I say really inappropriate thing. So it's like you know,
it's it's borderline, you could be cancelled, but the unfunded tequila or any. If I,
was that guy all the time I would have too many friends and I'd I'd be over,
what the movement of a career was that was my ass, my implant, I know what what what what do you think they worked for you weren't, brilliantly yeah, but like if I drank today. Ok, I couldn't do a show tonight there. I could neither
okay, so things have changed. You used to be able to write. I used to be able to I used to be able to why just wouldn't I I could I mean I could I just I would be like I'd, be regret it and be like that. I said: that's irresponsible.
You because you can't I care who you are you
act, is not going to be a sharp. No, if you dont, even if I drank the night before I can do it affects
I could do that, but don't you this is. Why do I drink and then I wake up like two hours later, like the sugar leaves my body and then I sit there and regret going. Why did I? Why did I drink it?
What is that way? Next to me,
why did I marry your nineteen years ago? I re I have regret the morning but want to drink like I drink a good amount last night and I woke up regretful that I'm being
healthy, whereas last night you drank yeah. Well, that's why your eyes are a little glossy, so you not a shooting today honours park, it's my podcast going to suffer because you have drank last night. No okay! Apparently I have a. I have a. I have rope, a doped myself in.
that no one can tell the difference, I'm drinking and not drinking. I am I e the I had my pay.
Were in town, they relieving last. That was last night, so we had I've.
in doing something that I am not certain is the right thing, but I've been eating an edible before I start drinking me, and I think that's. Why am I like? I sleep
better at night. I don't get woken up in the middle of the night. I sleep so
I lived through the nightmare. Recoveries. Do the do the do the roof, but I'm having a hard time getting up and get going the next day which I've never had when I didn't eat edibles? What time do you sleep till,
late on this edible, like eight thirty around morning slight and I usually wake up a six year, and so
I've been sitting at eight thirty, unlike lying in bed, be unlike I get up,
Oh, my god, you go right back to find sleep. The guy
get the marijuana out of my system. Why don't you feel it slows your brain down? You're not processing is fast. That's what I like. I like that. I like that for the die like that for the next morning. I like that for the evening I like that, for they got. I started
published. Seven days ago my sister was like he gotta. Try these edibles yeah the really chill, and there and they'll help you sleep and I ate one and my recovery score was mostly recovery, was ninety eight percent. I was like mother fucker and I didn't drink, that much alike had a drink and then brought pretty fucking high, and I was like nice
feel fucking great, a really chill out under conversational and then the next night.
I can't do it. I went to the store bought two tins of a year.
parents doing edibles with your harrods regional sisters, eat them. Here's the here's, the rub
as officers on christmas eve, christmas eve
We gave everyone, everyone that came down and edible everyone got that'll, be up everyone and so on in the kitchen,
we're cleaning up looking and I go. We fuck him. We kill it. Oh shit, I think it's my know a thing as my my whole cardiologist
as I clean up. I go. We didn't over
normally we over by last sunday, that's over Joe Biden over by at all levels, but no
with food we we ordered the we cooked the perfect amount of food like there was just
one portion laughter the potatoes one portion of the french to one point like a music perfect, not like we did it, we can create the next.
well they're about a week ago. We did.
Over order either and I'm like this is amazing. My sister ghosts were all inedible which are like the fucking thing down, and the problem was. I was mis timing, these edibles and
ray meal. I had I was going. This is the best me alive
out of my life yeah. This is the greatest fucking meal and we were,
saying that when they do, they have a view
you like ours and last night my sister goes again. We she made dinner for us
I hate inedible. Last night I go I'm in a rice like this, my life, this rises
Are you says, rise at february, right city, why it is right that is good
it's like you, gotta stop being so tonight is the first night of mud eating edibles. I'm just going to go to sleep. I guarantee you, don't sleep you're not going to make it through. Then I wind up at them seven nights in a row now I need tonight you're, not sleeping. I was thinking about I'm I'm thinking about maybe just eating an edible and not drinking. I am in such are in respect of your substance game.
I wish I have to schedule if I'm going to drink or do an animal like for my own?
yet must address. We open yap with because it
If something will happen like somebody will all have to make a decision, a business decision like I'll pop an edible then like they need to know when an hour and I'm like, ah shit
look, that's always like anytime. I try and enjoy life. The universe goes, no no
or like I wake up in the morning- and I am just it's not it doesnt work over the last one was the last time you like. When was the last vacation. You too have never taken a vacation. I was thinking about that today. I have a hard time like like I was talking to.
andrew shots yesterday, an
he's on vacation and as I like, how do you do that like Heaven is checked, just dig want to costa rica? Unease
surfing and he's out doing, podcasts and not cream, and then he talks to me is like fuckin fucking fly down here
and in my head I was like I will but we're doing a podcast, I'm bringing my camera like yeah, I'm a guy. I couldn't I can't just I I told him. I can't I don't I I I just don't have that
Everything I do is work related, yeah I've seen your years ago since you're gonna drop and aim all drop in him. I was torn seinfeld and we are of the view that a button right now great jeers, sorted out- and you put me on that list. Just people
it s a magic so where we're hang out before the show,
because a hang and he said why
never been married, and I said because no woman can
me feel the way
if he alone stage- and I still feel that so I've I've been up since it
SAM and I've been working, nonstop, creating editing,
opening of my own, I haven't gotten to the wherever team, which are very envious off, is why
I did on my own, I make two clips. I post a pleasure. I make the clock put the right size for instagram, which is different than tik tok, which is different than twitter, like these assholes can't just to one format of sending every time you put something people tell you what you doing wrong everybody. Have you thought about making the thing that? Why does it going over the counter, but it's like she's just I just want to write effing jokes, but I can't I'm torture. So so that's what I do and it brings me such pleasure I can't imagine being on a beach feeling better than editing in getting content out. I was probably better at that when I was younger, but the business is changed so drastically that
I can't imagine it's just such a grind. Now
the saw my fucking comments.
There's so many talented comics. I watch videos. I see a dude.
I saw do the other day, those so much funnier the me and no one knows we as yeah and I was like
no one knows we is, and all I thought was fuck man of this.
I could learn how to like, promote himself get himself out there, a little bit he blow the fuck up. Would you have
reach out to that guy who sold him for them on the podcast and told him to come torment with me, wow yeah, I was like dude you're, fucking hilarious. I was like if you have any free time in January february or february march or April, it's good for you cause. I find the
most comedians are in a position to help people don't help. People like, I would say
today, you're helping me and I appreciate
Are you? Having announced, I listen to you on marin near the day on the on the plane, and I would like us to get bogged down.
I have an an audio in a while, so I just I've never been on a for real we've. Never done this! No, I think that's why I said when I was at my old house. I think you
I would have sworn you did, will never never done. You know how there's your podcast,
circle, like all you guys it. This is the first
in the circle that I've done for real yeah. I've never done your mom's house now shut the fuck up, Donny, that's, but we're out either
that I assume I've had everyone on twice I've. I've never done the closest I've come as I had Bobby Leon, my podcast yeah. That's the closest, but no I in an mare maryland
beyond that which very general very early on twice once I thought that was
second level. That's what but with that. But I would argue
that lands on you because I go. I would
I assumed I saw you the other in, and I you, after that I I'd love to do your part gas. You never texted me back. I never never universal
im in I'm in I'll, be honest. Everything happened with the oh well that ge and, of course it should happen with me. Come on.
I love you- and I bet you are mine in- was our mind because Bobby Lee told the story completely lying about something that happened in south africa said he was being mugged and whose
the ground they were holding down. He looked up and saw me and he is watching its
solar. My mothers are complete bull shit. Ok, we weren't there. We didn't like not jump in its ipl Bobby's, always the victim up. The ass, though I had him on, and I said, listen I saw you talkin about this on my mother's hauser end and I played the clip
and he knew he was lying. You seen his eyes and then I pleading and banks in haiti and was what was
I dared you to know you aren't there. He goes. I got there later and he told me the story later. I was at the hotel when he told me the story, but in his mind his crazy mind. He believes that I was there watching him get mocked, but Bobby has what I have, and that is you tell the story.
That you need people to feel like he needs.
to feel what he felt and when he felt is so much more trauma them. What actually
It happened like I do that a lot, and I do that all I did with almost every story is. I will tell you this. I will tell it like. I need you to feel it yeah. So like like I'll I'll. I I tell stories about me and Tom sometimes times it's like. That's, definitely not what happened. Lego
but you know that kind of dead and he's like well. She didn't ask me to get on my knees and I'm like yeah, but that's how I that's how it made like that's how I felt it. I felt it in the room.
and but land does not look I'll. Tell a story
but also at eight, I like to craft destroy so that its good. So then I don't know
just sit at a dinner party and tell you up bullshit fuckin story. I it's honouring a thunder
will tell you a story and bring it along with that Bobby said, because dupe gl believe everything I say on podcast is true to you and he admitted he lied at the end. It's a really beautiful clip. It's on my ticket
You have been on anyone's podcast. Nobody asked me, but no, but no one asked me
I think rogan asked me. No, I'm not asking grogan, I'm not asking! I totally right now I'll tell you right now, but I said I was talking to Joe the other day and I cement that bobby Kelly
in our view, was fuckin. Really
awesome is really a great fuckin, rogan appearance. These great bob and he said
yeah man. I can't believe I can't believe I hadn't had among
last year. What why aren't you antimony as yet asked music? I think,
George at times. People just forget that, like like, when you
texted me early hours ago, and I am I me I really
Lastly, it just recently set up, and
an organizational structure,
so that I can type names of people and just go only items fuckin in bag and just type in the thing
An riley tax issue the day and I was like an hour deafening when I'm on yeah
the old set up. It would be just me and unless I reply and set the date right, then it just doesn't happen. Yeah and now I have jen, and I I I I think,
it is. I have at times- and this is either true or my own insecurity- have felt not welcomed or rejected by the comedy community
and you can figure out. Why use what we talked about on merit and to the point where
It might blow your mind too. I I don't work. The comedy store, I'm not past at the comedy store they won't. Let me work the comedy store where there's a lot of people that are past the comedy store for whatever reasons, and I was impasse to the company store until like fucking four years
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off your order. So that's part of it because I believe that comedy podcast
thing was born out of the comedy store. All you
as a store people, so I wasn't there for the nascent the beginning of podcast
but I'm not I mean I am
store guy in that I go to this work for mostly nets, but I'm not in here
only a store guy,
A more an improv guy, because I started doing sets the
probably l land. I just never
store, wasn't wasn't welcomed me
welcoming me when I moved out here and I didn't know
those guys and it seemed like a collect that I wouldn't breakin do and then I think ultimately, Tom became friends with rogan and Joe
resell to me and we became friends and then I became friends with all those guys before I even did the store hadn't even formed the store. Before that, I think, and then I met friends them and then, when I got past the pug you're right podcasting is born out of the store. It's that's an interesting statement because you did have
There was a there was a tension between you and like, like. I don't even know who the comic would be but, like I know, you're
saint when we were young. I know that you had this like tension, vision
all this heat when you are young and you had all this
off going on- and I remember
watching you butt heads with, I don't even know.
I would almost say patrice, but it's not gonna patrice, because those were all your guys, yeah, patrice perche retries. Somebody said that there is a podcast episode. Where he's talking about me and saying just generous things. I'll say this about all those guys are all
the comedy seller in Boston, guys they work been nothing but kind of effect.
and I would come up the cellar stairs in they were comics table. Nobody ever make fun of me that were just they were cool. I don't think I've ever really body.
as with any other woody when you say you feel like a distance ring you in the comedy community. What do you feel where'd you fill? It is ah! Well I don't I don't
You know I reached out to I'm not going to say who, but two people I'll tell you off the air that are big in the podcast game. If at one I did their podcast a few years ago,
I should want! You hop on mine and what I'm saying hop on mine, a message saying above to hop on yours: yeah, ok and they flat out just you know, no, I'm too busy and I've gotten up before that. Kinda bums me
Well, I got I've gotten that and then I've seen them on other people's podcasts. They have suit you're too busy right just minds, not good enough for you yeah. I just I feel like like. I
always felt like I'm, not the comic that hangs out so
If you see me at that, if you see me at the store, I'm doing like one of the produce shows I dip in and I dip out, because
no, I'm going to get myself in trouble by hang out. That's what I think. That's the thing thing you got like cause. I would I felt really uncomfortable store when I first started going there and I remember talking about it in therapy and my therapist was like.
You said you wanted to be a you want to work at
If you want to work at the store you gotta hang out at the store you gotta get showed that you wanna work at the store yeah, and so that was like the hardest thing for me is to be what I would argue was a successful comic trying to get past
in front of people that weren't working, so I just thought you were one of the original guys. I was there with Bobby Lee early on in all thy soil. The same way I so I felt a connection between me. You an idiot because I think we're all roughly the same age
and we all had aid almost like an outsider's eye.
Was falling and an outsider in new york. I never felt like. I would never sit down at the table. The seller I'd walk in. I gave bust my balls for a second, but I just go to the bar. He asked talk. Geraldo talked to tell and fuckin leave
I never I never felt like I still to this day, don't feel like a comic that likes
sit around and just you know, ribs, and and does this
like I always feel like an outsider, but I felt that me, you and any of tat same all had a weird.
kind of energy that we weren't like.
the sounds really weird to say, but like we weren't entirely broken, so
come into comedy going like this will fix me like we were like
This is cool. I love this does what I found, what I love to do, and I'm also going
work hard and try to succeed right like like one
I'm done with my shows up. I want
sit down and right everything went that went wrong.
Wrong. I don't wanna, I'm not going to sit there and just make fun of each like. I just didn't. I didn't hang out with the key
next. I you know, maybe maybe that came across
Subject: ergot. Maybe I was arrogant, you would have a better perspective on me. Know me, you you haven't, I never saw you is arrogant. I saw you was busy, I always
Remember you having like one of those messenger bags on a leather go you have. I am just being busy like going I'm doing this under
this. I'm doing that and in a weird weight as business are, are caught. Comics do not reward hard work; they almost mock any sort of hard work like
its inherent in in comics, to be like a base you trying to make fun of you at least the general.
and when we started the guys that the water it they saw
you trying it was like they would make fun of you far than I thought
I always felt like I felt like coming from a not like sports nolan
only analogy. I with comedy with sports separate sports grown up, so it the first time ever did stand up
I remember saying to my dad. You remember that
You said about brad rakkeed grown up that he was born, play pro, that you could see it that there is something different with him I go. I think I found that in an comedy. I think that's my thing, and so I looked at comedy like I did just baseball really honestly, because baseball is a every day
in sport and comedy, was an everyday kind of sport. It wasn't like- and these are weird analogies but as a as a catcher. My dad said when I was a kid he was like come he's like there are people who can play baseball like they.
football meaning they got one game in them a week and then there's people who can play baseball like to play play football that my baseball withering away, every single fuckin dead,
yeah, a baseball player can show up every fuckin day and play, and I love that I love the idea. That comedy was like,
Did it was every fuckin day every day that that you were gonna bad such, but you played so much that you can
your average up so- and that was what I and I just
I remember seeing
like me, you and an eddie. Anyone like three issues that were I just felt like
the outside very make funnel very
I am and doing our own
thing. In that I want you. I just remember, especially when
the documentary came out with the the standup documentary I remember going. Oh, this is going to be fucking huge for him. This is going to be fucking huge for him.
because it was all but based on a nose like- and this is I bet there's people that are like that are like
fuck fuck him. He shouldn't gotten that I should ve gotten that it's my turn. That was the weird thing.
businesses are always been those weird rules, and I just never listened to a myself like tat.
Be why I wasn't accepted because I don't play by the rules on data like you all circumvent, I'm done,
in about stepping on anybody, because what I think is beautiful about stand up,
these there is room for everybody like. If I here did, you were pressure, got him like great, but I mean
heard. More now than an older and like I haven't, succeeded to the point that I had hoped for, but still there
plenty of room at all. I tell a story: I wanted to tell the story today, because it's about you about remember when we were in the dallas airport
this is years ago. This might be fifteen year
ago. It was one of those days were like when you go through the
what you see all the comics kyoto into digs common from gigs like there's a turnover day. You know it
in the area of data, and this
to me, says so much about your character and why I always respect you. It's it's! A nice, bert story of good good em, like I'm pretty positive
blacked out at the dallas everywhere, but keep going you, I didn't remember so
I see you noted up. This is what happened
I was on a show called teen wolf. We did a hunter.
As an irish member. I do remember that somehow, and yet you wanna tell me, I don't know you tell you tell it. Ok I'll tell it's so some fans recognize me and were like out of them
jumping up and down, probably wanted a picture. Then I look up.
There you are filming at
and yours you're. What's so excited said, and you put it up there, you couldn't be more support to you weren't going like. Ah, what did you pay them to scream like that? Like you didn't cut down the moment and I go bird is a super
ward a nice person and I wish there was more of that in comedy. I know dumb. I think I think I I've always looked at it. I I've see things from a on from not the right perspective. Maybe like I. I look at success in this business.
as like, it should be celebrated anytime. Anyone succeeds everyone, you know, no one likes cancer culture, more than comics comics the sec
something comes out on some comic. Every comic source turn all especially like not coming through working their tax in each other. Look at this fucking guy knew it garbage piece of shit and they are just like a member.
When I'm a ruin, Hardwicke got lit up and visit firm, I mean in all intents and purposes it seem like just as being a bad,
boyfriend. I don't remember any of the details of any of these anyway, I don't I mean, I know that young lady and I know her father as well, and I know both of them, and so so it's it's weird, because I had bad breakups or bad breakups. I didn't look whenever I'm not going to
but I remember the data happened. I was doing radio and always comic sorted texting, fuckin hardwick going down and I was like,
happy about, and I was like I, like Chris Hardwicke he's been very kind to me.
Look don't use a little bit of a weirdo rise in asia, we don't run the same circles and but he's all right.
very generous to me, a very kind and and I've known him for so long. I dont want
bad habit, anyone and when people
succeed. I fucking love it like I love to watch people succeeded.
I remember when dane got written up in USA today as the largest album
Selling median ever I remember I was my dad texted me or called me
it goes. Do you have the usa today and I said yeah, and he goes your body dane cook. He's he's just meant the fuckin number one, and I remember taking that in taking a shit.
And thinking and thinking boy. Nobody saw that if that coming back turned in a story is a really nice story of oil going so that's possible like goes that, wasn't a hostile, it's you know when dyestuffs menaces where gordon
are all of us were like me. We were both of us were working at the time, but, like everyone's like what
That will never happen in danger,
no I'm not saying everyone does balances
organs, but a lot of people do manasses where guard
then it's not it's, and but it's only achievable now, because dyestuffs like it's only like you got you people,
have to succeed for you to succeed. Also, you kept
I believe, in that whole fuckin? One dude gets all the fucking shit, the
I don't understand why comedians
sing on the most support, a person in the world, but but I haven't had a chance,
to dole out, but I know I would dole out Y know. Wave
I was like I'm thinking of the day. If I I have this fantasy of I made
billion dollars during sin of comedy. How would I give back to the community? I thought about that. A lot okay- and you can hear me this one already
I was on his part gas years ago, and I said you know what I was living in new york at the time. I would have a boss that just will go from club to club taking them.
to this day still makes funded at no should have bugging, oh by the way. I would just be writing that, both now and in the new thoughts I just be drinking,
no one is back in bosnia, Marie whirl ass. If he would like, instead of us jumping cabs or did they weren't goobers backed entropy or the subway, you got the comedy got a couple of buses cross in town taken the cop. What would that take royal? Now? Yes,
the fantasy was. I would shut up podcast studio space we put
users and lighting and a changeable background in. I would loud comics to come in work at a certain level that the only thing that gets hard. How do you do?
women who can and who can't, but I'm always like how can
I must get back. If you look at like musicians, you ever see like rock and roll hall of fame and every grit
macartney on stage with bob Dylan in their they're playing this song in that, like mick jagger's, they are these people,
so supportive and you do she down the part
gas community, but for the most part
comics are not that they're, not good. That's why I asked two earlier you found this guy. Are you going to help the guy you're going to elevate the guy
I was in that documentary I'll, bring it back to me personally in it can come back to if someone's been cancelled or comics in trouble
gives you the ammunition, the comics in the comedy community, to take that person down, so even if its
true at all you go by.
the guy, I believed tat, he did it.
She did it. I believe it so that documentary gave people
ammunition to say mama, like the guy, though that was it so in that document area? So
an interesting I have re. I watched it when it came out.
And I recently watched a couple clips, but it's just so
There's so much loaded in that you're. What why is it interesting first about you should instead is interesting, because you were one hundred percent, an open book you gave them. You gave them comp
eight access to all your emotions, all your thoughts, all the things we think inside
but don't say out loud. You thought inside
and set out loud, like it so easy
and by the way, now now it's even more. The clip I just watch other day was the Stephen right, clap annette
that's even more fascinating, because I've, because when I watched it for the first time I had never ever experienced what you are experiencing, what your experiencing was a ton of he like I'm talking the
industry was, it was already Adams day and they were asking you a flavor cake. You wanted for anything, you had the most you at them of powerful manager in the business representing you and you have the biggest comic in the war
world putting you in his documentary as well as their film anyone that heat was so fuckin intense, I'd, never spirit, unlike that, I still have it but have experienced the part where you said. I've experienced the part where you say something
reckless like oh and where the fucks like I've done that, because when you get a little leap, you get a little belief in yourself and you're like fuck, you I'm here how about well? How about everyone just pay attention
me for a second I bought some. I ask it here and in the very cats
what a fucking guy it's just like, Barry fucking go ahead and enter and by the way your does. The other part is like
people know you know, bury the thought like a stranger. They just walk them. Yeah, it's a guy. You know very intimate. Who knows a lot about you and I want
that recently and I so empathize with your statement, because I've done that we end and what
doing now, like he's directing he just wanted.
Oscar nearly right came up
that in the movie police you are unaware, I was. I don't think I saw anything wrong with that like I was just like I was a young guy, because to me, success was something else in in awe
stephen right growing up for shore. The funny thing is it this thing: people
still watch this. I and I dont know why I wish they would release the
regional version of this I thought it was me.
or even they showed more closely
I won't stand up to you. Had you could form an opinion whether it's funny or not. It showed me in a u haul packing it up in going off to LOS angeles, where I got it a huge deal with warner brothers, television for my own sitcom, but people watch it in they still. First of all, people are so dumb.
They think it's saw you in the news. Seinfeld thing it's like it's not even in hd, it's not even ceiling
Rectangle on the screen you dumb ass, is seinfeld what twelve you think. Maybe it's
released years like in excess of your who do you
Thank you are what what an asshole in unsanitary go. I'm the asshole bill.
cause be, is in this documentary yeah it still. The original chris rock pulls messiah with his wife bill, Crosbie he's the most kings, write it up and by the way they also,
sidebar. He sits on gary valentine by the way exists.
It produced by army wine, steed and still the asshole. You understand. I might be
the only one in this documentary that hasn't been the present. How did how people
I'm still the us all, because I said I believed by some circles, for this is before reality: television. Yes, this is before this before everything, but people are watching.
now still form the same opinions. They just don't understand. Editing they don't understand the producers ago when it before me a few. If you're gonna said
I felt tat for me, or you know you don't that you, you think you're funny and though cosby or whatever we wouldn't be natural as a comedian go I'm funnier than caused me,
me. Why? Wouldn't you the only reason you
up on state people getting up on stage are now thinking they're funnier than us in their younger two thousand. They should think data you
I want to take out the big person and had their confidence or you were telling the stores earlier about your father and the sports analogies I'll, tell you where, where the the road diverges- and that is sports is quantitative. Ok, you can point to write field and you could not get out of the park
If it goes out of the park, it's a home run. You can't deny that in comedy, if you don't like the person you're, just not going to die,
Even it doesn't matter how funny it is, you can say, jump on it. I don't like them. I don't like people at my show. Booker also written quote crossroads in the front row and decide not to laugh and you're like huh, what
why would you have energy and it does just what they want now, what they fuckin want. Yet they were
be there to troll you and put you down at an that's. Why, like it
I dont know what I was gonna say, but it's it's! That document every with such minutes such you, think it
help me or hurt me in the long run. Overall, I think it. I think I helped you overall, I think about I might my career could be worse. We do you feel like it.
Two. I think it's done so many things. I can't believe I'm still talking about it. I'm you know laughter this out a little aim out when it when I shot secret time you release the special
takes a third year. What was
as I remember this in santa ANA. Is this what we're talking about what the special you are. I was getting ready to shoot secret time and it was must have been two thousand seventeen okay and with a loud yeah and- and
and I'm talking to you about your special loved, your fuckin special, but I think I think you.
I think something like that. I think everything builds up builds to war. I think everything
in his dreams. I massively regret that are out there that I name in just a minute so much romania, but like just
You think I mean it's at him up over shared with my relationship with comics in the industry that were negative,
fact that I didn't need to say here that it could it just never set a fuckin word right day. Another reason why I haven't done podcast because I'm afraid you know
saying things or over sharing idols. My share a likeness. What the one cool thing about this is that we as, if there's anything you don't like, we'll take it out now and so butter
we can't leave and everything I mention the names of those three people bird over there. I remember when we see rogan earl back in the day was live so durst I mean there's twenty five podcast. I did yeah. That are just me. I, as fuck with no
No recollection of what I said: y'all going home the next morning and being like, okay and and and but there's and there's little things that I think my personality is especially on podcast. However, representing myself is changed.
in so many different ways were you're doing the thing that you said where the producer says
wouldn't be funny. If you said you're funny, you're funny and insightful, will we have done that on podcast, where maybe that's the big stamp?
that everyone sees for awhile and you got a kind of out grow it and go
it was a bit? We did it's not I mean it's done, don't want it to define who I fucking am yeah, but you just gotta kind of look passers and just keep driving forward.
I would argue- and I told this stability to the region. You're successful- is because you are an open book for them it, but that's why I like that's the thing that made me.
love! You in that documentary was an I kind of like I m kind of made me
Look it's seinfeld a little differently expose like us. I poet that he did kind of
show shitty sides you that was that were cool, but I had done if I'd with every single one of them. I denigrated with every single one of them, because, as a comic you just shared every fucking thought you had, you did not at it at all you let them get. You gave them a hundred and access and that's the only way to
fuckin and by the way it's a documentary. How many documentaries have been made about stand up is documented people still talk about. The fact is that there's been doing documentary forever, but I think I think that it's, I don't think anyone in naming of look at watching today thinking it was made today, they're fucking,
moron, but I think anyone who watched it when we watched it now looks at it and goes oh, I can't wait to see what he's doing
May I you know it's interesting because that that special more than thou that you love it thanks to its now on youtube. Ok, I bought it back from chosen
and I wanted to sell it to netflix. I wanted to sell it to other places during the pandemic ago. This is going to be easy right. Aren't they going to the content we can do to year and a half of being shut down? Nobody wanted it. So my team said
what did up on you too? I go for free, they go cheese.
what you see. You can always take it down. I put it on youtube. Expecting I didn't we
ah conjunction with or at the same time as the mariposa, so is going to do the marin paw gas and put this up to give people a point of reference
Could I knew we were gonna get into marin and I knew it and do I put up I go. I just want to get
amongst the guys like me, and you drive more merrick crazy actually to this aid and still he loved me for two days after their pockets. Fact hating me he said to me: what are you gonna do that today? I love the color of this part of the
Is that really love the color? So look at a look at it, I put it up. Training at twenty five thousand views. Look at what its at one point: five million- that's fucking awesome for me,
That's a big deal, that's his bible. She, I I put this on youtube a few months ago, hoping to get twenty five thousand years, so I just put like the one before that on takes the third.
two days ago and it's already up to thirty thousand for me,
These are big night by both for anyone there big number young age. Anyone there big numbers is a great fuckin special. This is a great focus. Both
Some great discussion under their about, like somebody just posted, wouldn't find a comment from a few minutes ago. Somebody Sergey shooting,
right here in the airport, healthier somebody
you're going to the most recent one. Somebody's a lot of people are typically fifty dollars. No yeah,
No, my money on youtube. Oh yeah, people that this is crazy, bert people. Just then mo me in
pow me and go thanks for the laugh. Like that,
was multimodal shut, the fuck up like more.
and filled the whole every fucking comment is positive
We'll look at see this is what I'm saying is that anyone who saw you in that seinfeld documentary that watches this special and I watch that spatula and I was like I was like man- is a fucking great goddamn special. I remember hitting you up and saying so.
What like, where did you should it? I got bunch of things the person used. That is shoot it where you have
it the only thing I really remember of the conversation I give good advice. I didn't know that yet he said shouldn't we have fans and I was like and you're like you do not want the
in the paper room. You want your fans to be there so make sure you have fans- and I remember ST jago doing philly, and yet I he it.
It's like I've, already sold it and you're like yeah good one, because I'll tell you the story in school because of this gets back to comedian, there's one that was. This is another five bucks thanks person
five bucks. Somebody says something you you'll see in a minute about a shining comedian, and I couldn't watching for years after that comedians adopt.
demanded by the way. This is where I get my feelings orders I start reading it than ones like this guy, so much better than that. I have ever greater and they go away like an. I don't read my comments. I don't need any of my comments, but the other day I read a comment
I was. It was someone someone and I was like he'll find it that I was someone shitting on someone and I was like I was like whoa. Oh my god, what is going on here?
and I got into the comments thinking. I've gotta be safe yet another even more!
engine and then someone wrote. Oh, you know bert crisis going out his feelings hard about this, because it did upset me- and I was like mother
I've been someone else's comment, yeah, that's inundate. Why at you they were its today still today to it out. I saw this morning, and I comment on
every single one cause. I really appreciate that he's gotta go back up to go all the way to the top. So I'll tell you a story. I'll take
I gave you that advice when I was shooting takes a third, which is a special. I just put up it's the one before this one is that up right now, it's up, I just put it up yet to on christmas up. Look it up
Why isn't this shit on networks? You know
but where's. Somebody said something about I couldn't watching for years. So there's some injury.
hosting discussion that goes on. I don't know, maybe you'll find it. Maybe won't do so. Here's here's here's what happened! I hope you liked that by the way like and subscribe that helps my my algorithm. It tip if that sports are called give me a nice big tip, show
So when I did this is how you have to take control your career, but I could tell you shovel stories like us, including how I got on the tonight, show for the first time, but I'll tell you this stuff.
about my special suggest remembered when I was taping ah takes the third we are setting up. We have production me
things and they were doing about six specials at weekend. They were
Everyone was getting to camera crews. The same
stage we'd have different backdrops the same director, ok and then it came down to their we're gonna release the ticket
and I said what are we selling the tickets, for they should honour. We give the tickets away, I it did in the what even a fans
in southern california, I've been doing irvine, improv breyer improv the ice house I go, I can sell five hundred tickets for special. I know it, they go.
I have been set up to sell tickets. We just do this mass give away hours in this
tell the offer, and I found it it's in the other stand of specials come
Oh, it is aware thanks. So what does it say always
where the funniest guys period. I will never understand that twenty twenty two that two thousand to documentary it's not like, they were amateur view.
first, they knew damn. Well, you can make people look good or bad with editing. Warning should have taken over the world after
in that, but I know for me. It took years before I was willing to listen to him again and then saw he was great. What the fuck was the most common that seven hours ago and that's by pajama person, but jam penge man,
headband, t v yeah, and I respond to all the comments and then some people to go. If it's like gilbert godfrey and bill burr at a baby
and then I always writer day that I don't think those two were even sleeping together. I like why do you have to make a comparison? How about I'm just already out of it? If I am a little gilbert godfrey, maybe it's because I'm jewish or if I'm a little billboard, maybe it's because we're both from Boston yeah. You know it's like who gives a shit like. Why do you? Why can't you get what you like? Look I've, never I've! Never! I can see him
What are some people that will be distracting at times? But I don't see that with you. I get lewis plaque. It's like I don't I didn't study this. I studied woody Allen. I studied jog
SAM Tennyson, the only thing called young I'll give you, my god.
People think this just came out. Do they go boy? Keep getting younger like people, don't understand so here's. So here's what happened. I have notes so here's the thing right so they said so the meetings wrapping up in a row.
I so tickets go on sale, tuesday, its with this code, you know or any special whatever right, and they said I said what, if I want to get some cops they see
Yeah just let us know ahead of time how many calm she wore a five hundred at they go. I go on five hundred
they already talking about omelette
give em away to my fans I'll. Do an email asked to my fans of what this new,
javert done this lonely whose producing this think they know this,
medea how why? What was mass confusion papers?
flying tears? You know now in the wrong, because I'm
outside the box- and they said, will give you three days to fill the place I within an hour. I sent them a less than five hundred people and that's why
look at this special. This people holding up foam fingers, hissing wanting Adams, weren t shirt from by shows like their fans, their fans and that's why this special
works. That's why the last special one takes the third works, because you have to take control of everything. I would have never let them I would have yeah. I have a. I take almost two
to control, because such thing, I am pretty neurotic about a little things,
I, like other souls of my shoes like out I'd, I dont like neared stages.
Hate mirrored stages and the sweet
a new shooting another one when the next one was so that's the thing. Ah now that
Why is my team says what you you
do cause so and so did doesn't so, and so did this you should spend,
is thousand of your own dollars, showed it and put it up on youtube for free, like that, doesn't seem like a smart business plan.
But that's what that's what it's come down to its well war. Here's the argument so like out I'll, take a look at still starve rose ari scholtz. Who else is big, I think yawning?
I did it. It was shane gillis, mark yeller miami late to the party, no, no, no, no, no yeah, no they're they're, all
they're all doing their own thing in putting it up and, in the end, the really uncontrolled their careers stars, probably more
I mean I'm only very acutely aware of stapi, because because.
I can't I why why I washed it'll happen like happen like I fell in love with the guy when they won't come down. I just got I fucking fight. He makes me giggle really hard him nick,
I meant that group amy giggle, really hard, no watched him do all his stuff,
I saw what he was wearing
forming and what he was doing, and I watched him open for Bobby and then when he,
released. His he took control is clear enough
fucking insane way and now he selling more
his in Boston, then probably
Ninety five percent of the comics that are going to Boston and then he's not from Boston yeah, so like that, I watch that there's nothing wrong with that man. Good shit is good shit if putting it anywhere
anywhere just giving an opportunity. I was just talking to a friend who had
deciding whether or not he wanted to shooter on netflix rate vo max, and he was going back and forth and we're texting, and he said you know. What do you think and I was like my advice- is fucking pointless because I don't, I really don't know any. I don't know I don't know where halston is going to find his materials. I just know that the guy was,
I see what is fucking hilarious throwback. You are absolutely hilarious anywhere, you put it. People will find it you're you're that talented, so just put it up wherever the fuck it needs go up like don't don't listen to my advice, whatever the fuck you can do. Do it cause it's going to be great you're. That good- and I say the same for you- you are I dude. There are very few specials that I watched and I went while fucked as a very special like that
get your that special, the the the one before this more the loud way. I just remembered the blue special alot of blue,
Pads and alone, I loved the blueness, and I love the ilo, the angles I loved
with so much. I loved about special sebastian
when he's in the teal fuckin sweater. I remember watching that gonna both fucker. This is good. This is
rate is right when comedies great jackie cations are special jackie occasions last fuckin special is so fucking, brilliant
huh that you got that this is where I'd say. I say this. I say this with. Like cautiously I'm not don't mean I'm not drawn through a
fucking shots fired anything by will say one of the benefits. Someone like you or jackie or
or- or someone has been doing it longer, that may be, has been under represented in the media and hasn't had the netflix specials, where the showtime specials, or what that one of the benefits is. When you put something out it's fucking,
good. You know how to do stand a comedy. You ve been doing it your whole adult life. So that's why that's getting one point to five million views?
and that's why the next one you shoot, I would argue, put more money into it. Make it look beautiful. I would shoot it and then I'd way, your options, youtube's look everyone's go to youtube for the content raising. If, if
as if this thing is seeing you know a few million times and it starts selling a lot of tickets. For me on the road I get it. I don't notice. Have you noticed this, but I am aging and I am for the first time, I'm like stop I'm going to fix this. Thank god. We've got this new sponsor. Lumen lumen is skincare brand for men with products that keep your face clean, while helping reduce the signs of aging does one of the best bundles they have is the anti fatigue, essential bundle which includes dark circle, defense, a daily dose of the best unripe cream for men that smoothes out your crow's feet and softens fine lines all while soothing those tired, puffy eyes, brightening your dark circles and fight the signs of premature aging with this must have addition to your men's skincare, routine, the charcoal cleanser. You can stop using that horse, dirty bar soap on your face. Luminous skin detoxifying, charcoal cleanser removes grime while helping keep
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I will say this about the internet and the
opportunities to sell produce. It is save my career, I would say:
Of course I would be. Nowhere is saved all wars like I was. I was at the bottom, my bottom,
for six years ago, five years ago, come on really do fired from travel channel is at stake
The travel channel, memorable snares, raw materials got another think they still. You know I to show in the travel channel two for america after dark hair years ago effect. I was on
When I was living in new york city and you could only get the travel channel like north of thirty fourth street and I love south
thirty four, she tried to go to my sister s house to watch my show our cable channel. He added I that's how early I was on travel social networks. By the way I was on netflix back my first seedy d.
Maybe
The most resistance was on netflix before netflix was even netflix. They reached out to me through my websites if we want to buy physically tens of years
cd dvds, I'm trying to find that email and they paid full price. I couldn't believe it I'm like. I just made two hundred dollars, I'm so excited this is I do try and try to get far from the travel channel. I was supposed to be funny or die tour. I got pulled off that. Why cause I was making it to the wall. I think mostly the tickets to the shows. I was on weren't selling
So they canceled, though, shows, and but I wasn't a name- I wasn't- gonna sell those tickets that all right,
didn't, have any money coming in.
Was reviewing our house. We just a moment where you're just like what the fuck
and and an and idolizes six years ago, ones it when one of the machine get posted, two thousand seventeen and so's. I I want to say, was today.
it was today. Why, how universal the lowest point of your life, twenty eight
the anniversary of the war was point tomorrow. You'll like tomorrow, tomorrow is wow. Tomorrow's, that's crazy!
I work I work donkey face. I worked at oxnard and why I remember my god anytime, you work. Oxnard will always point in your life. I love gummies got a job offer like shitting on oxnard fucking, love external help, you she she doesn't.
No, what oxnard is she thought? Oxnard is santa monica santa Barbara yeah. She
that's what was she was making fun of it, not realizing. It is a predominantly aggregate,
draw community where, with its it's just not the people, she thought she was making. Fuck me
but you didn't withdraw for the show. Try to cancel the show now think Bobby Lee took her weekend. I would have taken it. I love that place. I love oxford club. I was getting paid twenty five grand for new year's eve,
I remember this and I thought I can't believe you're paying burke that I sold zero tat. I,
that is a little tickets Tom was fat. Shaming me. We were doing await us competition behalf with rogan that I was going
lose? I knew my beard was getting shaved off and I had discovered a couple things that I feel
and very insightful. I discovered I learned how to edit right right before then I was doing vote.
Ogs and I learned in doing vlogs how to edit and I learned, how to add music and I learned how to loot music, and I learned that I learned how to do that and then I I started making posts.
on his grand. I was just jazzed up a little but yeah, but there are jobs up enough where they look professional and remember the rock retreat.
Where were the rock
mere commented, medium me and then
If people are at the lowest point in their life can say, the rock is retreating to observe yeah, and then that was at christmas and then rogan called me and was like. Do these videos are fucking bad as those two moments I was like, I soldier tickets. I've done. Ok start I was driving back. I was listening to creedence clearwater revival and I said:
I'm going to take charge my career, I am not listening to anyone anymore, I'm not doing any of the rules got. I'm gonna make content that I find good. My opponents ram, I'm going
to promote my shows and I'm going to take control my career in, and I the one of the first things I did as I started uploading clips to my youtube from my
special it was illegal. I didn't realize what I was doing was not allowed. I just upload in hawaii you to an end and on this day it's got fifty miles
reviews right now, just at fifty
fifty million oh shit. Now I feel bad about myself turns out
the twenty nine can be the lowest point. In my life till I was excited by one point: five million thanks part
he's, gonna say if I may, it's almost as if you went back to burke christ, you're working at the car at the house
and I heard you became the guy who wasn't going to play by the rules, it's as if you got lost for all those years. I you came back to your dad's advice and you were like I'm not going to take this crap, I'm going to play by my own rules and
We'll get not sewing on that progress in twenty
Do you not selling tickets? Based on that, I wish I could see what I mean.
really rogue independent is a lot of
I would have to hit a broken, be like yo, you repost, my tweet about my shell in portland, you'd moves from tickets by
I do I, but also people didn't know me as a stand up. They knew me as travel channel Joe rogan friend, so I was like I was like
Ebay, seller or or or fuckin
alton brown or any one that would have been or bourdain. I was just a guy, those on travel, so they know me as a stand up per se and that clip went viral and I remember
going and then doing rogue in the next few days, and then I
started selling tickets and then I started every idea
I had I that I thought it was good. Like I start doing, this thing called the waitstaff raffle and then that went viral, and then I and I was just like I was like fuck, I'm just going to
shoot. Everything cover everything post, everything, I'm an eminent self, promote and remember people goin, I member
here and I remember hearing a guy. I thought was a really good friend make fun of me and he's like I'm, not some, I'm a real comic, I'm not gonna fuckin put on a speedo to sell tickets, and I remember a guy. I liked that I thought were really good friends saying that a recent by the way- and I was like
was that I was like its edited out I've. It's interesting, because everything that we have made enormous progress, more ideas, and I don't like the guy- I don't just doesn't like me. I remember I remember seeing you mean
these videos, I think, you're. The reason we have to like everybody I'll be the jimmy camel comical new year's eve come see me like you,
doing these like videos and is essential. I had I had an idea where I said I want to do a dance video I wanted to do
I was watching a hip, hop dance, video, download, daughters, so pissed for so rocks over one year. We should do about dance yet, and
not that everyone shit on it. No, like the dumbest fucking thing in the world, as a woman learn a hip hop dancer. I learned hip hop dance for twelve hundred bucks. I heard a girl named d glaser and I did this dance and I learned how to do this dance. Ah, and I and I posted egg when she grabs her she's great, and so I did this dance folly, sweating so bad that a lot of backs wacko, and so I did this video- and I put my tour dates at the
and and it sold out all my tour de vos of itself immediately. I was like okay, so there's bert, with his shirt off that I want to ask you another question: do you are there any days? How do you feel about your body? It's so funny. I never really thought I didn't. I didn't grow up as a fat kid I hear, there's like kids that grow up, as fact
it's always see themselves as packets outdoors in shapes. I would see myself in shape like I was fine,
the very opposite of me: yeah, oh yeah,
like the shoes, so I put on my towards aids,
its growing than those also doubt amaze. Also out the day, I posted this.
The damage is yet more so than the next. What I did was like, and then I got a tyrant, gonna scrutiny risks
I set it up so that I was like split me and bigger venue
put me where we want also to take, as I can do, that yeah and so the next one I did was
arching band, one, my heart,
to ban for like living three
dollars, kind of our backyard, and I was I am no preparation, as like I just put on speed owners like yeah, would what's wrong.
Guys know and there were like. We know
rubber band, then the villain when they get on, and so we
We did
rubber band man. They just played it
and I just I just five directed at the moment. I said I I'll be lifting
its and then I'll walk out.
and some of the roma
the marching man stepped in and the guy will come out with the drums behind me and then you
has be around my pool is this. This is the making of.
You mean you're, a management, team, wet dream because
We know I'm not a wet dream because I'm so I'm actually nightmare o, because I'm so sorry
Had these guys sit around the pool and we did it and then sold out all those tickets, that's great and so, and so then I started going okay, so for added shows I'll do smaller things, but for big announces we just did the cruise the fully loaded cruise.
and then for fully loaded. I was like this obviously perfect, because
we were in arenas in stadiums object. We always had tickets. You can always had to say
you never sold out, so I was bring a whole team of us, so we shot during the day the editors
would sleep during the day. They stayed work all night and in the mornings they'd post and we set
could attendants, and so many of the venues you're shooting the shows and in relation to not just for just one would fun. That's what I what I yeah that's what I want figures are so many moments that our unscriptural. In fact, I have a tab yeah my youtube unscriptural moments that are just phony that just how.
When spontaneously and it makes people realize we, we watch a com.
These special you you,
If you have a beginning a and you have the the z, vn and you've got to get there, but when you see live comedy you're going to see shit like don't watch stand up comedy.
on these streamers in you too, and think that's what happens at clubs, notes, board or theatres wherever we apply in it, it's beautiful like that's. Why it's really important to put those on
script moments. Will that that's the beauty of of
shooting content! Anybody you cut it. Like
when you said I do it all myself. I did it all myself for the longest time- and I am I don't miss it because I would get stressed out like when you did as our service will,
I fuckin know it's gotta be this has gotta, be that I used to get so stressed out. I would do all myself, but I loved the I loved the
I love the making something the making something out of the funniest fucking bart cause. You make something cool but so like we did aura. We did vase. We've done everything
now now openings canada, my hands days, you don't want to take your shirt off. You just stop feeling today
feel good about myself now.
I love the energy of I love the energy of taking your shirt off. I don't think I've ever had my shirt off in public. I don't real yeah, I don't at the beach. I don't take yes for real yeah poor part like you'll, see if I ever go to
poor party- I just never get in a really
yeah I'm so florida like that, I love I'll, be a naked eye. Was a naked dude. My whole fucking life,
one of those we were dirty kid
yeah yeah dirty naked get. I didn't. I met with
speeding up until up- and I were speeding up until I was like well,
that's what I slider man knows. Vetoes Espinosa, let's get up, I just where speedo and I'd be enough.
me too, I pronounced below in the morning and we go fuck in play and I just like the idea of the bee of free. I still love it and then at what son, when I was a letter,
Well, that I remember the first time I got shamed for wearing a speedo teamwork. Kid you make fun of me, I think, is the end of
innocent kid I was, and now all of a to start following the rules
and so I bore son, britches sunburnt is,
our son, now index,
ass. I sat type in sun breaches. They were fucking bad, I would mean a person bridge is now sir,
you wearing this: is? U being defiant and being a rebels? Umbrageous sombre is weak
fuck you not all those years, another son, something that up north we war, I wanna, get back
it was somewhere. Those were cause, fuck, I'd where those I just bought a pair of retro pony sucre. They weren't they weren't elastic waistband. They were buttoned waistband. I didn't button waist,
Don't look at me like that of adding anyone, the axe, surfers yeah, yeah,
in fact the auction, because what's interesting about oxnard, which I do like
I just want to show that clear,
interesting is terrified about I'm scared. Jeez I wanna get cancel and oxnard moments.
That's all! Right! Now yeah I mean I it's I got what whitney was trying to do. She was trying to be funny
totally it may have missed in nowadays.
if you miss like that, but she was getting like death threats. I gotta
Did her progress right around the time it just like. Don't mention ox. Unlike what happened, I know it's like. What's your drama, she won't. She I think she was is the reason I don't
about like politics is she wasn't being addiction was honestly she
misinformed in what that city was. She thought she was punching up but in fact she's a wealthy woman making fun of what? What when I read it in the comments, what is a very working class city right and so
But I think that, but those are the best cities for comedy. Oh yeah, Philly philly is Philly boston, cleave
and omaha how enjoy detroit troika those like the greatest
Fuckin cities for comedy-
they say no stanhope said this a long time ago, but honest hard, nocturnes grape, I loved,
a lubbock club I bring my hour everytime. I was about two an hour ago. I think some people get angry at oxnard, because it's such a big room, it's hard to fill the tickets, but that's not oxnard fault. No levity lives bought the comics fault. If you don't, if you don't sell the tickets, if you don't hire the marches, that's a lot of those tickets that stand up live. Are a lot of fucking ticket comics get in trouble when cause you have to be able to take risks. You have to be able to get out there and like it should.
You know your white shouldn't be aligned book out of it. I think I dont think a marriage
some of the comments, but I I I just what like outrages, I don't think outrages as genuine, as was
like I think, it's easier to get outright, it's easier to get outrage posted and then almost like forget about it than than it was
I remember outrage. Genuine outrage was like the JANET jackson. Nipple slip, my people
had to write a letter, yet a fuckin
it was january. Now I mean it was like I remember going to places and hearing people talk about that right, because your kids were watching and also this girl's tit
like, but the trend is in this. What this is, why mix comedy harder and harder as everybody's, outraged about everything everybody their flights delayed in instead of just calling somebody goat, I can't believe it's too late. The solution now is to pick up the monitor the computer motor and throw it I've got you.
I wanted to. I was the comic I watched a comic. I saw that that do so
lady that today our fucking lunatic, I get scared. I haven't been on a flight knock on what I've been on a flight where there has been
a drunk passenger who loses issued on it, but that scares the five for I have when we were coming out a covert
I was not on a single flight, we're somebody wasn't taken off it
Are you seriously and I'm sitting,
one weighty, couldn't believe she had a middle see she thought tantrum an dodd demanded by
bob work. They tore off and I'm sitting going lady, you don't understand how hard it is flying whenever things on schedule, your name
never getting to that destination. Like sometimes I balk at first class and the like we puncture down, do our coach that'll happen to make sure they may have happened, and I just hope by just get me there
it there and shut the hell up like what who its
Five hours out of your goddamn wife, like like these people, are acting like a petulant little kids, I dropped the suitcase on a dude's face one time with a face. Forgive me well, you're yeah, I fucking I this is. This is the funny. The week I showed up late to the finale of eyebrows at the bar drinking yeah, it was in canada applying edmonton to phoenix phoenix to l a
ok. So I getting on I've of a steel, ramona yeah,
ro, went items in ramallah, roller back I'll catch us its steel, YAP, sub, whistle
If me, that means slicker than the other one yeah. So I pull up in the thing, and I think I got it up
What I don't realize, I'm put it all the way and in its slow,
I, the lands on a dude's face and breaks. His glasses almost breaks his shit and he is live at rightfully. So what I don't know is, he has already been fighting with the flight attendant, oh good, at before I got on the plane, yeah and he's a kid and now what he does is he accuses the flight of time.
then of collaborating with me in getting me throw that on his face, and now I'm lost like I don't know what you're talking about eye urine collusion your
collusion. I
if you're arrested. I want arrested and unlike alike, and that's why go up to the finding? Who are your listen,
I'm worried, I'm gonna get cut off cause I so I'm like I'm like. I don't know what the fuck she was. I've had problems with his passenger or we are going to have him detained in phoenix
I didn't do anything wrong. Don't worry so I said I said
I go home and I'm really sorry, I go, I'm not an collusion, and I said- and I echo please let me pay for
Suddenly the door collusion media. We play an algorithm, those causes.
Landon trouble was due to settle down with the word speak to me like a human, I just dropped. I just drafted
suitcase on your effing face you idiot conclusion. He then says I can't afford his glasses there so expensive. I can afford them
what he doesn't know is marked sales in canada in Edmonton. In the early ya, like two thousand ten were fucking, but now I shall have that cash did. I do I don't guess yeah. I had that gas forever, because too
with canada, get your shit together and get your dollar equal with our dollars. A bunch of this today
yeah. I had six thousand dollars more has in my pocket, the ipod, oh yeah, six thousand dollars. I in my pocket yeah as I'm talking this guy goes. You couldn't afford these losses that everyone, a first class, is looking at you watching this now and I'm drunk, but also like trying to make sure that I play this right of rank and ngos syrup. Oh all, says
I'm sending a first class as well, we're both at first class
I can only take it. It sends class near humped up, and I am not saying I'm rich, but I deathly can afford a pair of reading glasses and he goes try. I should give me a price and he goes fifteen hundred
dollars, and I per six thousand dollars in cash out carried off worm.
Really. I can offer you hear fifteen hundred dollars for your problems. I wouldn't negotiate an ice gave, it seems obvious,
I to my turn around and the whole first class cabins. I did that just do just pull out,
six thousand louise and crack em all
it's fucking, not as if we're at tim, hortons, coffee, and so I sit back round funny. Then it gives me a cocktails she's, like you, don't have to give him money and I was like nah. I felt bad. I gave him money, then the guy comes up.
Like the raptor two hundred dollars? Oh really, he was honest as a really good for him. Lord bosses and I went ok, and he gives me most of my money back and he goes of others keep four hundred bucks in that
It'll pay for the glasses. I want okay, so we could all, I would have said, keep the fifteen honey you're going to need it for bail. He doesn't
was about to get rested yeah, so I get off the plane I get off in phoenix and the cops grab me but ass. I look. I look like in the fund has, as I have not. I am. If not the guy sneaks past me,
and with his wife, you don't look like the ones we got arrested, he's fast me and then the cops
interrogating mean they're like what happened, and I was like us. I gotta be honest.
yeah. I didn't really see what the fuck happened with anyone yeah. He wasn't that bad on the flight and I dropped my thing on his face broke his glasses. I think I broke his nose yeah. So if he's upset I mean, and then I just went to the bar and left I disappeared- ran into Felipe Esparza
yeah to save the remainder Philippe herzog. Do I just took a due to nose, is at all
Oh
and one as yours, this region
what I was doing rogan a lot so probably two thousand twelve twelve to fourteen yeah yeah? I was back in the day when that was when you did so, but you could sell tickets and only a couple markets. Then you can sell. You sell twenty dollar tickets,
princeling a thirty five dollars. I think I'm still at that level. Twenty dollar ticket is, is a great match, great place to be because you can sell fuckin you can
you're not out of everyone's everyone's anyone's price range. Everyone can afford a twentieth, edra everyone for forty dollar nine out of date and end with drinks when you, when the thing that really hurt me was when I got to thirty five dollar tickets, and I audibly heard fans tell me I wasn't that
funny really you weren't thirty five dollar funny or funny everybody started with Tom. I don't need the oh really. I remember people coming up in the meet and greet I'm like dude thanks keep your ticket price reasonable, and I was like. Oh thanks in the: u boy Tom is charging thirty bucks. Tell him he's not that fucking funny and I was like as a
I'm definitely not going vault automata feeling that I'm here about said that about me right and then they said about me and then I mean ARI was like when I started doing theaters already got very fucking vocal with me personally about my take a break
and he wanted to be in now. He didn't want to be in control by ticket price, but he was like ARI who she fears. Yeah I do what I did
you ve no comics discussed our ticket prices argument homage right tickets over new year's eve. I can tell you that probably
I'm just glad about you. Have a hundred or to get its ticketmaster Zeb. Wouldn't look was soon
it's amazing as much as I like to just crap on my career and pretend I'm like a victim to me.
It's amazing. I was pictures of me. What is all that who picks this shit
the internet decided that picture on the left would mean
the tide, I nothing makes you look more middle aged ideas.
We can all do like a saturday night. Now you go on new year's eve. They gotta be pressing years. The least be fifty bar is another
the thursday twenty eight and thirty two does this air. Before then we can ever sheets open, no geo preferred ceiling.
how big is room? Thirty, nine in the back. What's the frost, seventy, seventy! I let's get to the front fifty nine seventeen,
that's reasonable for new years and fuck yeah yeah you're, going to new years in vegas fuck. Yet this will sell out too yeah yeah. That minutes. I remember last summer's hers that did well. They don't have you back. If you don't do well,
that's why that was my whole business plan was just make sure the club was happy and do whatever I could to sell tickets. But, more importantly, like
I'd hang out after I'd? Hang on the bar? I don't I get the staff loved you boys and you probably one of those assholes gives like a big tipp, makes people like me, look bad. I do I'm a pretty big tipper area
but but I will, you know what I used to do so like you'd paper party, when online regan network newspaper party for the entire
staff I would. I would do so. I found that I was getting remember going bonused one time I put us is like,
a thousand dollars and I was like whoa. I want to keep some for me right, but I go. I want to tip the waitstaff and I was like, but one hundred bucks isn't going to make a splash of ten people ever like ten bucks. I mean I'm sure they'll be like oh thanks, but it's not going to be like a like
back in the like age, and so I decided to do this thing called the waste of raffle, where I would put in one hundred bucks. I did it recently and was I was pretty sizable but I'd put in one hundred bucks and then pass a.
get around the audience they put in money, enemy pull one name out of the staff and then that person will walk like a thousand dollars, and that was a game, but don't you think day
then give it to every all the I keep what I what I did lot so they started doing my stop doing it, because I added I don't mind
look. I understand they all want the money, but the fun of it. The fun of it was giving someone a big present.
Yeah, giving someone a big moment where they got to not worry about money for a month or or the things.
and the things they would say we're so moving. One grows
pay for my diabetes medication now and what I want
yeah, I'm a month behind and but now I can catch up, and so I really appreciate that and you're like whoa one girl was like I get to buy the expensive courses
I'm pregnant and having a baby, and now I get to go by the nice car seat. We are going to buy the cheap one and I'm like, oh my god, like it, made a difference,
then they started colluding and they would all and like it was always the county old waitresses whose like no fuckin new people, but your names in the bank.
we deserve it like it was all. Was rick rig up Y got really nasty. Why so, then? Not so what
did was in medicine and I said to the staff I'm to give everyone the staff a hundred dollars,
everyone's getting one hundred dollars from me. It's great. That is so that you don't collude and split the money yeah, so no you're getting one hundred dollars. Anyway, that's really generous! So then I gave everyone one hundred dollars and then I said now we're going do the waitstaff raffle.
and whoever wins at winds, all of it huh
the girl who wanted just got dunbar boyfriend. She had moved out madison with them here,
they moved in together, and then he kicked drought and fuckin left to shed a fucking move all the stuff out,
Should this bush insanity that all stages are dominant but also the way just comes.
at one stage where sampson accepts the money and tells everyone where she's going to spend it night and we've had some good while I'm the best one. Was this guy? I forget his name and he said he was a black dude and he said started crying. I was like. Are you okay and we relaxing and exact kentucky goes now? I get to be. He goes next week's my daughter's thirteenth birthday and georgia was thirteen at the time and I was like I was like wow and he was like. Now I get to be the father, she thinks I am so what he goes. I didn't have enough money to buy her a present, let alone throw a party
Now, I'm a thrower party and I'm gonna get her what she wants, and everyone starts crying, and everyone starts running hundred dollar bills up to the guy and fucking loads him up. He walks like twenty seven hundred dollars and that's gonna affect your merch sales. After the show, though,
yeah
yeah
I agree that you like, I ate everybody. They should be generous, but let's remember shirts or thirty dollars and a lot of bad. Yet it
I'm excited that you're gonna do do more stuff on you too, because that's works, people funding, hunt, people either. I found my content, I go hbo max. I go spectrum, I go now
Alex that apple apple tv, no, no, no netflix for me is number one, but I don't watch. I watch every one special that comes out. I watch like the first ten minutes of every special that comes out just to just
was a no shoes- I'll shoot me a hard time, I'm having a hard time
getting older wearing cool shoes, not at all
can always wear coercion sign no by five, as today we're going to europe- and I
I want to bring sneakers with me cause I like forming a sneakers, yeah n a and then I was like well, maybe I'll, just get like a pair of like grown up boots and wear the
those for the whole trap and be a noun up now, but give up. What do I do by do by a lot of sneakers are just a couple pairs. I have. I have
Fortunately, companies have sent me a lot of stuff. We owe my garages,
full of shoes. I've never worn. Really me too. I have time now I just got those from a bus driver.
the lebron james of fruity pebbles. Those are so cool.
Really cool I bought when I started. I I got some money in my career I started buying.
issues from the eightys, the old, like retro. You just said that the pony.
Yeah, I got the ponies and then I got you know the soup
we're stars. They did the adidas. The police drives with a pull up the ones at the bottom celtics used where they had celtics had a pair. Maybe did the super started. You'll see what they look like yeah that are not yet so go to,
see the fifty dollars. You click on that image. Another way once why the show up.
She also superstar didn't say
at the eighties,
go on wine. You can actually by an auctions original
it's amazing is shoe
in the eighties we're skinnier there were more narrow and beat the tortoise shell with a detour to stop at the toe. The tortoise toe thing was more yellow.
Why have the so the other? When I was in arm? I just did
Cirque du soleil. I gotta tell you this story and I wore them for cirque du soleil, but I also wore them in what he did circus. I gotta tell you the story it because it's so funny, I I did that I wore
from the eighties by you. I bought a bunch of these, but I
no, not wear them outside it so
the green room, the other commerce like what. What do you mean?
rogers changes, user guide buildings? Don't these don't ages? Yeah say they stay
in these. Are these are too I don't where these are the ones at this,
the actual wearing out. What the last time they were good, I resign. I have
They choose that I only I keep on the bus and I I would
in bad weather, I won't where I from the bus to stick to the agreement
I will have em in the green yell and then I'll put him
the green exact out of velvet pair of airforce ones with iran.
it was on it. I love yeah and they're, really comfortable. I wear those all have. I had those I had a pink pair of air force ones and then I've I've gone through
some nike s bees I love like yet I just got some pink. Ah god, what is act out that dad converse pink to converse with its?
We still see susi made them together. All I ever saw those brenti sharp ass,
you aren't you by the way I reach out the brendan said today we should we do. I didn't know him in them. Really
jiving get along well in the green room, so I reached out to him. I should love to do your podcast beyond
listen. I'm open to doing you know,
when a passive you just reach out to people, I don't have anybody's number
the ghettos. How cool above is really the color is plumbing.
area. Do not plum area is no, but I like it. Yes, a flower that the we go to hawaii
they put around your neck. How cooler those
membranous shah, boris yeltsin.
Superstar, look it's yards yellow area. I have those kids, I wear
when on stage so I did so
to lay in vegas. They really mean it is sort to slay they. This
New york is called mad apple, it's in the new york new york and they got a couple months ago. So good I was in it now. Would you like about it? Can I look at
What does that scope a camera possess? I thought I was in october.
You do not know I get it in December. I don't hate it goes.
How did you like what you like about the show it was here? Let me pull up there. The youtube trailer for
yeah, it's really cool. I love the mixture of comedy because it's really stand a focus.
a lot of crowd work. I assume you're, the guy do in yellow the crowd work and now I just stand up ass.
Yeah asked yes, oh there's like there's a stand up guy then there's like the host doing crowd, work,
going in and then there's like crazy, accurate acrobatics and stunts? So it's like it, so
the survey but like the comedy version of soda. You gonna hear that citadels explanations great hold on. Oh, my god. What which has happened as a fucking rick last monday,
texted me that my glasses, or is that we go to the same optometrist. I guess that means the glasses are in.
You ve got video of my glasses sitting on the thing with my name on it. Like you look nice, looking glass did the weirdest, but why does he have
access to your glass, as is its? Is there so he's like he's
getting his glasses and he just see my glasses. So then is like
how many pairs do you need what I get for wow. That's a few mani noticed a few money is just it's irresponsible. There's here's how I believe I believe you should have a lot of the things
that? You need all the time I sunglasses chargers.
I remember when I realized this was all I had a little bit of money and I was like an I'd heard. Tom say their charge was across the room and christine as we have
we know. Yet why don't? We find a way to get our children up to the bed and he was like yeah. I guess we could afford to do that yeah and when he said that I it made it because I was that way. I have a charger then I was like why? Wouldn't I just get a longer charger, so I could walk instead of like having to hold it like this, the bed, but I just move it like this, so I have. I have a plethora of whoop chargers. What is that it's
whoop I have a whoops, so I always have these around in there always charged this one is a similar. I watch
I know that's for the whoop. What's a whoop, it's a it's! The best fitness tracker, I've ever worn in my entire life. I think I think somebody told me about their amazing, and so I have that I've beaten the chargers yeah I have always I go hard on pants and always
Me too, I love having geysers over here go and I do what other thing
reading glasses? I like tablets, grinder. I have reading glasses and sunglasses everywhere, because I
always need sunglasses, I'd really. I I've really sensitive eyes, and I am, I cannot see a thing without reading glasses
usually heard you ought to read one that once after five want to low wow
and then I kill how do you handle prescription verses reading so my they bifocals, no noma prescription or by their my real. The readers are just expensive readers cause and there a little better because
I use readers and I'm on my phone a lot. I will get a hard time
just in my eyes. Or can you wear these all the time or only male? Your only when I read write like I can't I've a hunter by fifty fifty twenty twenty fidget YAP, regular
I can see everything from everything, but when it gets in here I start it gets. I lose it. Yeah great
What I can see that that's a comedy jim
The war started reading glasses like when you are
he's going you're older. It just goes for one thing reading, but I fuck you go for everything, because now you have to like every
I'm you look your phone, which is every other minute gifted put on these glad. You just saw some. We gonna go ahead as I bought for pair and- and I like the frame
these are precisely the ones. Let me say anything I say what are the latest it's for me to take your one point. Seven box,
it is those are no. Those are those are legit. Prescriptions are one eye is worse than the other. I up here tell me if you can read off these dates in Jane
Were you owe the burke frazier and gin?
April, be an awesome january. Ninth will be in stockholm january tenth Berlin genuinely recently re glasses, reno. Thirteen, dublin general thick sixteenth assets, dont missile.
Shows athens, they're going to be great, genuine, I'm not allowed only fair and already in january
in manchester. Let's get united in go seaport. Price are generally twenty first class, go generally twenty second, newcastle generate twenty fifth amsterdam. Generally, twenty seven. I can't read that work, but what sneakers?
will burn be wearing. When you see him, I dont think I was I was thinking about. It then was like,
Maybe I just dont you sneakers I'd- have to kick his camera sneakers outdoors in europe in this manner. Yes, you can
can't you varies and caution dirtiest.
I buy a shit pair that you don't care about and just ruin them go. I'm going to ruin. One pair of sneakers bought a pair here's. The other thing I gotta tell you about fashion in general, nobody gives a shit. What any of us look
like where the only one that cares and arson
kurtz, I become shoreless. I would like to leave I'll put a little.
of effort into my shoots, the other guy right. That's fine, like everything else, I'm yet, but nobody cares and I'm wearing eighties. Superstars, like I could just get y know, so, no it out I've. I disagree. People do care. People do care. There are people to go
there are things I didn't think anyone noticed and people notice like. Ah I lie
a pair of michigan off whites.
Whereas there and the number one common I get from my guys, like nice, kicks like those fuck issues.
An umbrella and telling me was the first.
marilla shoes matter. I was playing red rocks and I said what shoes unaware of these in these and there were the off whites. The mission will fight the pink lace
is all over it. Yeah as she goes, I spark razzle dazzle and I said really she goes yeah like you're, not wearing
A thing in your red rocks like step up her shoe game and I went ire, and so
That's when I started really focusing on my shoes for my special I had two sets of shoes made I like made from the from this
pull up and an eye, and I picked based on like one was elephant almost python and I pay
based on our warmest stage. I let the audience
amazing, the audience psych dial then the like that,
once the blue ones and as I everyone.
and then one guy was like where one of each
I get amazing how much we put into like when I shot the more the loud special I still haven't, I probably bought.
Many different variations of wiping out and tested them different nights, which ones I felt comfortable and which one pop
tamar doubts or blights like there's so much involved, so much involved whose tell me this truce, what what are the latest feuds and in the pod cast comedy podcast world, whose feuding now
is something I'm not involved with at all at all, which is that's the only advantage to not being in the podcast or think there's any. I mean whether there is the big one was the the Bobby Lee Bernie shop, one that was the big one yeah. That was.
Probably the pair were together in the green room at the comedy store. I was there really are sent and we all took a picture that was that was a crazy one, because what was that over coachella yeah? It was, I guess,
Brandon had hit on kaleido I mean feel bad. It's all stop. People knows I'm not drunk during just rehashing old shit, but
Brennan it head on koala and
color and Annie and asked or brought up on their podcast and
but that he'd on, I guess he had hit on any to end, but
and say his name in them? Brennan. You know, I guess was columbine. That was like that. That was probably that it, maybe that's the biggest podcast drama.
I mean you get like the little ones like. I remember that, but the eyelids evoking get involved like does now. He is.
he doesn't get involved in his own drama. Beg you another one. Other views are there and what do we have to date? There was the one my favorite one was. A witch
a good one? Was the Michael J tim Dylan one europhile that now we ve got out? What could that be about is
I don't know, maybe tat s, not really all social media. So we can it's. I don't know how it happened.
but he I guess he post offices,
stories and then they do they go away in an hour. Yes, that's how he puts us in phone in, and so I guess in my im from my perception he was here
padding tim dylan like saying like you know, chinese done good
What I don't know I don't want to fuck you. I must really well, above by the way
I'm done about nod thing motives for letters but like he tyndall makes me laugh
hardly any one individual yeah, he is the funniest fucking guy in the world. You talkin about foma TIM had a christmas party there the day it was great, but did you go?
I didn't, I didn't get invited, I didn't get invited, and so I go. Ninety go I'd. I'd I saw Santana said that he went so. I d m tim. I was like
christmas party and you don't like me. I go it's my brand. I love parties now and then he wrote back. He a screen grab
invite and I went from other factory. Didn't you
me and my job and I just read it. None would like
reply later on and and I was and I go, I wrote back, I'm a fucking idiot PA and the news like, of course, ain't he, but mainly on the girls, but I guess I guess Michael J was, I oh, I would say, was head padding tim. I guess and then TIM's
once was just hilarious. It was like a good,
said about any of us he's like you know, my coaches done pretty good for a illiterate
alcoholic can't read: what is it
I mean it's not was it obviously can read it. So it's not isn't it the, but it's just funny yeah that drama, but I think they're friends, I think they were fucking around like I don't know if the Bobby Lee Bernard Shaw, but if it's real, it's very real. It was
farmers are gonna, get violent, no girl.
would be extremely once very basque right net. They did a podcast together to squash it. Just like the three and two point,
one million views. Oh you haven't seen. That is a pretty interesting one. Is it? Is it legit rosters and no? Oh, I mean I don't think I thought I think. Ultimately it is squash from Brendan's perspective, because
He did everything he could to apologise and make it right. I think also merely Bobby, and I've had I done if I with him feeling like this. I felt like this before Bobby feels like it.
It's the same thing that happened when I got drugged by ARI. He goes why me like. Why did? Why? Is everyone doing this to me like? Why does this happen to me? Do people think I'm weak or soft and I think that's what where bobby- and I had a long talk about it just talking about the feeling of you know, cause he felt like he was bullied and I've I've definitely felt like
that. The time for in this business is a whole thing. Is that katya comedies? Not it's it's weird, I remember telling patrice are so happy. We were friends and he was like we're, not friends. She's, like we were
altogether such a patriot, he's like what do you mean friends that he thinks he goes if I go to tampa to stay at your parents' house, and I was like probably not like them, we're not friends ha knows ago, I guess you're right and he was like. Are you picking me up from the airport? I was like no, and he was like them we're not friends huh. He was like. We were two guys who work together, who, like each other, that's what we are right and I was like
Oh okay and he's like: oh, don't get your feelings hurt about it and I was like no I'm just saying I thought we were friends of friends, we're not friends. So socio, like
s mouth like if I do brendan paw gas to have to worry about alienating Bobby
if I do am, I do I have. I made any enemies today by doing this, podcast, probably yeah. Probably I can play a couple of people that won't wanna. Have you got there, but really who's ad someone who, like really come out, saying? Oh, no, no, no, there's! Definitely people that really are there's. Definitely people who just think I think I get. I think I get. I think I make I dunno, I dunno what I there's comics that dislike me, but I think because,
Try you know I like trying. I don't hear anything bad about you or near there's. Comics dislike me. So what pie and thereby I mean really this is
we have done. Is that none of the month, nothing that really counts, like you all, rape, orgasm friends, with pretty much, you know anyone this area when it's a good package, you ever feel like you're you're done talking, is here
All yeah what somebody can be set like what wins the next one you're going do. What will you do the bare podcast out of here
out of Austin Boston that that podcast is that's different, so, like this podcast
for me as a labour of love in that I enjoy catching up and talking to comics, and I enjoyed this
and I enjoy it, I'm going to enjoy it more. We were
and his studio, I'm enjoy it me.
Or there I think some butter
two bears a different animal because I write down ideas for two bears. I write down ideas for two bears throughout the week like any time ago.
you go over to Brazil. Like does. I saw you like you're, going back and forth, which was funny about. Could you take out this mme fighter?
Could the Eu Israel earth no date media you're talkin?
yeah uh wait. I was yeah. I started it. Fuck
beat up. No doubt you have you and tom, oh, take em out,
when was this. Did this come out recently, each year,
I don't remember a lot of what I found out anyway. Nature make money is going to work. Tat allows one rose like that. No reason
I don't think they d, as that guy can take out, like someone tells me something tells me made, doesn't get a whole
what a nuance, so, oh, my god, this is gonna, be yards and art is, I mean, look I will I'll get my SH. I don't mind getting smacked by the deal. He was because Tom you were like wait if we like, if you went high and I went low toms like now, you don't think there's
any chance we could ever take out now is now like it was. I would be a great fuck, you
Remember doing us ever santa remember. Remember challenging yours,
ellie Israel, our sondra otto Sonia alessandra, yeah, I'm a challenging him to a fight.
And knowing I lose my thought, what we could do is we both have to start drinking beer we'd have to drink each drink.
and beers and then we'd fight cause, I think cause he doesn't drink. So I thought I could maybe get an edge cause. I'd be a little more confident. Do you think if you guys drank this can be
paper we drink and then put on those inflatable summa somewhere. Wrestler hibernating made the essen zuma wrestling. Nobody would if they had if they were willing to do that, we ought to be a great comics fighting mme cause. Mme,
comics, love em. I may I may loves comic, everyone loves ideas and that I think sometimes I too
gotta my ass, with guys I like, because everyone
those I like em, like I'm like Israel, is a very funny dude
and whenever I talk shit about him, it was. It was always
a fun hearted way you, I never tough shit about anyone. I dont like they're, not any emma funders. I don't like. I don't think
I don't know why I like em all every summer,
we want. I like a narrow, is cool deeds, so they have good sense,
numerous and there are four. Would any of them be willing to put on assume
ressler blow up, inflatable outfit and drink and
wash around about cowboy slowly. Would I bet you would I think you would be a guy that beer?
That would be fun too. I just I love. I like I have you seen the the two little guys trying to beat the big guy in the ring now can awesome. Have you seen that
What do you? What do you mean the guy dresses as like a guy dresses in like a like a fancy scottish acts, an outfit and then too little
as to asian due to try to beat him up and he tried to fight to asian. Due to its awesome, clearly seen that is fucking put two on one fight. Are you
notice that it did. The straw string is not even a second a bother. You know, I'm gonna fix on post efforts as a bother. You Emily
gotta, hear the circus all why waste to be released? Yeah, are you garbage summons burning when today of real couple hours ago is characterised by whereas it look his tube?
it is one I love it. I didn't I don't even know about it has allowed. I would would stand a chance now I bit by bit. He would not me out so
a quick you intolerable are bigger than him, but talk a lot bigger
major lama, wider area. You were finery waiting to oneself, I'm a man you gotta
these guys there beyond man
you really waiting as low. So like one fifty five all I got, I thought people wanted to fire.
You'd like waiting a one. Seventy I have sent you yourself, I had excellent believe are rarely if ever you she's a badge is roughly a third, today's
our anniversary he's like fire.
happy entities are our anniversary, ice and.
I'll get neighbours six feet, one. Seventy ways anyone see he's without he's the height is the weight. I should be,
at the height. I am so he's in great fucking.
Conditioning why's, he would be the ship
what I really regret saying that I want to fight may know you didn't say you want to fight him. It was a scenario I believe right. It was a scenario. Could you if there was a fight with a faint you didn't see out,
Fine, I think there's a couple I mean. I think the problem is what he would do he's just a bit better. Throwing his hand
then we are finally is better at everything. The eye is actually better effect say this he's better a comedy. Then ass, much ass, you! So we don't get it.
I just like that. I love the way he does, because that's not the way. This thing- and I do this- I do this at the gym burt when, when I'm at the gym,
and I see like a total muscle head like a guy whose entire life is dedicated to the gym and nutrition like when he's working out, I dunno the guy. I just got this ago
look at their reaction at so long because some of them play around round over. You know they get into it. They did is just little fuckin muscle at guys. Just he's
Stockton. Isn't me fella warner. I kept by the way I can't beat up anybody from start.
anybody over the age of ten starting, my outside its young, the fact that they are starting a fuckin, I'm number one.
I'm Joe quoted a promo video stockton and everyone at ski masks on miles like what the fuck
he's on the start and burdens are known to us, was media's fuck about us.
he's. My baby is one of my favorite fighters to watch. Yankee is fun while his brother to his brother, two men, they were so there's so much fund a watch, there's so much fuckin, fun.
it's it's kind of cool, but you think, if you are a fighter, do think like view that equivalent your comedy with fighting but fighter, do you think you bill
yeah. I don't know me. I always liked mohammed Ali to me I loved. I mean we're talking that night.
Do you think your mohammed ali I'll stay? No, I know I'm not, but you know so, let's try to find an eminent far or by a prize fighter. Boxer like I feel like I'm. Sometimes the guy that fought thyssen when he got out of jail
Who was that guy? The vulgar white guy mc mealy, yea yeah, you're, boss, yeah yeah guy, I feel like I definitely was
tommy gun yeah, like I definitely fuckin,.
Do we find the collector that's? What's this day was the day Mcnally peeping mealy
yeah, I'm I'm I'm a solid peeping neely,
like I'm a cinderella story that guy find out buster Douglas, find out with the pete mcneill he's doing now. I sit non cash know he didn't make that much he's gonna move. Now, I'm assuming you meant! Oh no! No! No! This is it was that good can tell bert. This is what they told him. You know the basics for shitless
Would you in your favour? Yeah, you win. You can have as much as you want the rush, your career, but this one you doing this one for low money. Thyssen gets all the money, the guy yeah. What's he do,
we did. I don't want to say someone's going to get me. Get me punched, but pete me merely could still beat the fuck out.
of any by any by our age, but it does have a weak appeal here, see what peter Macneil is doing now.
See if we can hire someone on sunday shape is young cameo I pity is, I think, you're in images yeah. This is not meant to go to all wikipedia o is oh. I just I dyson
I just deleted cameo from my fucking phone today why I was like I was like I've never used it. I dunno what the fuck it is. I just signed up for it for real yeah. I had the guy
The ceo on my podcast really yeah and he'll pitch me on cameo, okay. So that's what I said to him. He said what am I feeling nearly a it looks like he saw that one picture he looks like mark cuban now is great. That picture. That was probably there. The fight click on that one with it where he looks in great shape with his family. With that say, those jeans he's in great shape. Look at him.
Treatment merely wait; no, it doesn't look like his life turned out exactly the way you fuck you outside, but that its time
and go to implants for life. Have you seen this?
plan for life, commercial, sick at these people who have perfect teeth, and you look at them and they go that doesn't match up with what they look like. They were doing meth their entire life. Ok, and now they have perfect. It looks like.
They did nothing like a big, what a life go to shit, but they brushwood and fly
all danny executives may anxiety to think about it. Yeah anita anything, that's a light, but I'm gonna hurt my arm. The fact that
I know this sounds silly that I'll say this, but that my body was no longer perfect and I know that I'm fat and disgusting or whatever, but like the fact that I now was going to have an injury for the rest,
the fuck me up. You're. Here we go here. We go there's one. I was watching what is with these guys dressed up.
Yes, in a suit with high, they got gloves on these guys, guys.
He's, throwing them around the world.
we have created a funk? Ass kicked somebody here. He really can fight what year assess this
is this part resort to. So I got a little so this thing and I think he loses yet
so they got him down.
Try to talk about it over and over.
to learn. The thai lost shocking.
he's the ceo of the fight circus thing, is peter bull.
So that's outsmart, oh my god, I'm gonna! Let him when I said. Oh members, a long time we all of that
in rogan I was like it'd be great. If they put like a backpack on on on Jon jones, is
for the hundred thousand dollars they just let people and
the ring slowly and likes it first person
yet so you'd like what we call us, what the pin yadda.
because the last person cracks it open. Yet all of the first person that yeah, like so you've, eaten pinata and get a fraternity and you go alright. Here we go Pinkerton, you pick your order, but it's a gang bang and it's it's I mean it. I mean. There's the the I guess the whole. The hard part is that they're human beings. So what once you do that you're now you're you're taking? What is the human cockfighting
oh my god, their fighting enzyme east, when fighting this away than a real sign. These area is wearing one big sure. Well, this is insensitive. Alzheimer's twins rates. I'm used to end. This is like god, what where's the potato sack fight. This is unbelievable.
This is insensitive on so many different levels yeah. This is by the way, so you gotta team up with a lefty yeah, I mean yeah. You want to team up with a lefty. This is boring as fuck yeah this. This one isn't good. It's a get better.
I begged? What happens if the shirt rips the can
continue or yet and what's fights full fight, fight, circus. I mean I like
I, like all that he's a rough. Then they hug.
Subsidies.
Okay, I would love to interview the guy who puts fight circus on
by the way he's all they've only got four thousand subscribers like this guy John John nut, John Nutt sounds interesting and he's a big he's, a big thinker in a comic
notes TIM, not in canada. Failure on a guy shore
The ceo of cameo on my part session, so that I said dorothy I should
social explained cameo to my parents, and I open open, like my guess, what the rant always in you, don't know that,
the gas and I'm just saying that that nowadays
celebrities lebanese to accessible to people, people think that they can be bought? They want every Emily
Only two in every every car
went on line in my guest today is part of the problem.
And because I'm really against this concept of cameo instead just give it a try. He said you could make
You can't just leave the forty thousand dollars I'll, give you my referral code yet weight, and then I get a percentage. If I get a percentage point, you made bark zion sweet if you'd, okay, so so it's a little bit of a pyramid scheme
feels listened. I don't know if I love it, I've done a bunch of them so far, but my favorite one was this. This is a great cameo. Okay, somebody somebody said: could you make a video I envision
and sitting around the christmas tree on christmas. Emma play this video in it's you
We, my family, that I got tickets to see you new year's eve in LAS vegas. Now that's cool, because this is a guy that bought for tickets at seventy five dollar any bought. One of my care
The us, and so on that to me was fun.
There is in our own nelson is fucking hilarious. He is so fucking funny. He is one of the funniest bow homage Eric Charles nelson. I meant I've met, I've taught them.
Call him before he is so fuckin funny and I'm never going to this law went up three hundred and forty two what's at that involve it is.
cheap. It's up. Thirty nine dollar radio asked I stopped bad. Now
I mean I'll. Tell you what I wanna. Do you ready for this yeah? I want to do cameo, but for when I'm dead, oh daddy, oh so I'm going to do cameos,
Did it is a problem that I'm not on the main stream in exchange for comedians Jim Norton worth detect summoned so what's goin on sorts, daddy knows: cameo, lebanon,
I'm in a pre recordable cameos yeah, two people just to go through the most.
John good idea, John sir, I'm dead.
But a man. I was alive. I want a party with you here and then due to end the dew cameos. So when I am dead, I can still make money yeah. I can still make money from my kids and not just any pepper tone like would that be
Like who's a dead person that you wouldn't mind getting a like, would it be great if you could get a cameo from trees yeah? It's like burt,
but then you got it and it's almost like he was alive yeah. Well, you know what we're going to have the technology to deep fake all this stuff, oh yeah, dice dice for four. Fifty four hundred and fifty dollars yeah Jesus,
I see this is a problem that I'm not even as a comedy tab welcome.
The fans there, ain't dat, phan where Steve sweeney with his picture with a bill, burr sweeney, guy's, hilarious, Boston, comic one of the better.
At top comedy taverns don barris, but you really aren't on here yeah. This is bad. You just had the guy on your fucking podcast yeah. This is bad. I asked him for looking to leah. How much does he two hundred to fifty
polish shore Tom part. Twenty five submitted,
I some self so high that they don't get any area the game too.
That is a wave about Jeff die
dirty sanna, but is it getting its once again, I'm left out
then why don't you podcast give with this?
We tabs laughed dare gains
This is as Israel, where the fuck are you or any now this is bad skip. Scrolling tale
williamson and
kyler, stone
call the ceo all right now find out who may explaining to do. I'm telling you about yeah.
come on a par gas, and I know what I'm talking about. Cameo yeah and I'm gonna do daddy. You see if you pick up its blonde.
keep goin justin martindale. Mrs laura comic, rust Jared
fell, or you know even remotely. None of this is this.
Embarrassing. I've got it he's gotta pick up.
calling you now he's british by the way,
the ever picture- and I love jeff tee for twenty dollars, not misled com. Please lives,
number gave me: china, real outgoing message, only out a blog at ten reviews. Five stars five
or how much one hundred and twenty five dollar reasonable right, I'm thinking of doing it to one hundred and fifty right there in the actor section, what a teen wolf ho and acting on t v timo figure,
You're not gonna, because you one of his at what what is it? What do you do is going
hey man I gotta like what is that one, not that one, the next one chief, that one
This is what I've been reduced to look at these losers. I have to make a video for
I can't enjoy my christmas like everybody else, even though
celebrated. I have to make up.
You have a jewelry errand, unchristian, three
the losers worry your ass with a roast here, but I would rather you anyway, what start with a racket jewelry? Ah ha.
the order this video and watch with meat around him.
Usually you order for the other people, then there's errand, who completely screwed
her life by getting married in running off. Could you couldn't stick with the plan? The plan was
Do you want that all domestic together home again and be losers? The? If, if you do that, you like that
A membrane upper dad when she sees us if my debts dead
You start crying a nigger.
Smiling what's up with your dad ha. That's so forget great, that's I'd! I did cameo for tom did Joe thighs men, Martin weir. This. Is this guy's, unbelievable?
They marty so out of his wet jacuzzi excite latterly
I don't need that visual, I'm doing a pod gaslight doing
gas right now. Pretty big want burke priorities as martin black valise across from me all that beethoven's arrogant non producing anyway. We
so I'm trying to sell him on cameo here. Let me put my idea nowhere behold, but I'm trying to pitch among cameo martin here may want to do it.
keep deleted the acted he deleted the up to date. On to
vincenzo. Then I give my code. I get a priest
as if his earnings right so I go to great korea, so I go with the biggest loser. I go got great ice.
producers pulls up cameo on the big screen for us, the scroll. He goes into the comic
the standard comedian section, guess who's, not there yeah,
yeah. What is added, you know what I'd do if today's debate about what that guy, the algorithms and always takes is complicated by them
I took it, but I signed up for because I knew you and you're gonna
it's terrible things. I need to speak to out about product guy and I don't believe I did that on it's own could get your mad photos. Okay, let's fix up your ears. He's got a patriot, hey Martin, here's my pitch. I want to do cameos.
that are to be released and purchased one. I'm dead, daddy I'll, see you in private life.
You pray record, I prerecorded honour them expressed. It gets interesting question.
He's made a living off of kiss it. I can't
Mr Gallagher. I haven't had a minute, I'm in a pre record of bonds, with the most popular thousand names and no end those. If you, like
man. I'm dead, but man I was alive. I love the party with Martin yeah, wait wait. I do I get it
Ok, we're gonna progress right now, I'm in a bomb, an array upload cameo to my phone. I literally deleted
Is that use cameo don't use now, I'm not put it back on putting it back on. Please I mean the thing is. I need to study it right now. Is that what your greatest get as well, as is how you make people feel at the canada thing, is a gift for somebody.
and it really can have a huge impact on them so easy to say when you take a twenty five percent of earnings, will you
yeah, so you back in the heart of the great,
Martin. Thank you very much for being on the pike ass, I'm put cameo back on. I have to give him my
oh right, Martin, so I get a percentage or we applaud it.
Yes they've already, probably you oughta and three digit mocha coffee thanks to cheer, sadly have new years. It's great
so now the passes devolved into ass, both on our phones? No,
my my wife's texted me. We should wrap this up. We ve been on for two to our EU air. This angle, saying I do want to hear the circus alike
it's a funny because I think you'll gilding so you're pretty.
Sir Alston works
the show and it's a mix of like people
can't believe some people like swinging by their hair. Like it's our oh yeah, it's an amazing look at the slugger that stop right by with the music and the singing yeah the singing spray it. You feel good. There's people flipping around by their she's spinning by her hair, there's a band aid
been bar like the fun
The stage
then in the middle of the show. Let's have a stand up, comic, come out and do ten minutes of comedy really and they need somebody big. They had Brad williams, brad yeah, brad diddy, who was the first one to do it, so
offered me a six month contract. I said no campaign vegas for sex bondsman lover. So then they offer me three months, cop contract. I said no.
I be in with your mom months, so they may go about two months now Jane they got. What about
The month december, where I was already bought at a private show, and I the jimmy camel- and I was in brea, so I said
Johnny shows a week when that
then shows five nights.
to night, and it's so precision it's like the show starts exactly at this time. You go out exactly this time.
I bet better. Do exactly ten minutes, you better, don't screw it up to doing ten minutes yeah ten times a night a week, ten times a week, yeah yeah!
No, it's kind of hard. Did you just want to go out and feel at the audience you used to your show used to walking on people cheering it's like now. You ve just gone out after like
he's all star angry bad, antimony, good? It's! Ok! It's! Ok! It's ok!
you, but you know not about the money at this point in my career, but I enjoyed it. This is the nicest most giving cast
I've done a lot of things and microchip here this is, there was no ego with anybody. Do so welcoming it in his.
Important because this
closing number number the code
the number I was hammered out
What about your covert? I was on my bachelor party. I was one of the last night. We saw a man apples. I was ass, yet so joke at the end of the shop.
because the one of that there is a lot that, on balance bachelor party, you went to serve, see circle,
so let it so everyone laughed and I was with my fiance hearse her sister and then her significant other, so sounds like he's been
for stronger running of us. As we all remember, the lab tat had now
gonna allowed yourself now was rated, are thou? Did they swear? Did you hear dirty language at the bachelor party, and that was the august so that at the end of the show
do this huge it's the first time the entire cast is on the stage and their flippin in there
ants in and get the audience go and right and then a cap another stage goes way out. It's probably
thirty yards out into the audience,
It's like in the round and a taxi dig a cab dirt car drugs onto the stage.
Age in the lead singer get on top of it. It starts going like this singing get in the audience and then looks at me.
Age left. I can't see anything it's going on. I can just see the taxicab and it goes like this and I run out the whole. They all part all the gym
This! The trap ease, artists them deducted contortionists the jug they all part. In its my big moment, I run of stage I take about ok, the first night when perfect chemist this guy
don't like does second not goes perfect. Third night, I got I'd like
see what's going on, onstage I'd like to see right will the only place
It is, though you should have I'm curious, so I I the only place to watch. The monitor is downstairs in the green room, so I thought I'll watch it on the monitor in the minute. I see the taxi coming out I'll know, that's time to run up the stairs it'll. Take I calculated thirty seven seconds. I timed it.
And I knew I thirty seven seconds get up there. Well, when I didn't figurine
was it was gonna, be a lot of crossing backstage a water there. You know the p.
But like one on the audience I run through they come this throng, I'm avoiding people. I get to work
for sustained mice, my spot, my mark and the camps full out there.
It is already stopped and the sea
nor is making his way up stage. I go shit. I missed a cue, so I run out- and I realize do not parting, this still dance and in full
back right angle, shit, I'm in the middle, the closing number in, unlike
watching them in their deerlike. Moving really fast, like like athletes like a really big guys, like almost in a second,
The closing number, like I'm bumping into people of dancing around them and stuff like that, I'm not even make it a we re going to fire me tonight. I get to the fund of the stage in these people move fast. They were all gone, I'm alone at the front
of the states now right right there, all they ve all move. So now I thought I'm just gonna dance off like data to now. It looks like I'm in this yellow commercial, like you know like this guy doing like this, and I get off this stage and
the producer looks on getting fired and she said ah congrats, you just made the blue pearl real eichel. Please tell me of
We have this on tape. Issue goes yeah and then a minute later, the guy
what I didn't realize was the guy I didn't the guy
those upstage and then comes back and then gets on the taxicab there was it so.
came out orally. Until then
later? He calls me out and now I've gotta I've gotta go.
Into the stage again had like feeling like a buffoon, I have watched the video lion.
so he's up on the tax it yeah. That's it shows up on that.
But this isn't the club where I screwed up somebody has it cause they let everybody tape it and they are. They sent me a copy of it.
And everything I gotta follow this thing's hard to do yeah it's hard to do. While this is hard to do all, I
to do is be funny for ten minutes and then not MR closing q. I screwed that up. That's the bar there's a bar at the beginning that fucking great there.
Wait, wait just go to the end of the day you were there. Everyone wants
the dramatic it's just a picture that the other
yeah, see the guys onto one another, all the picture I wish I did write play. I wish I brought the video cause you can watch it. Can you scroll back? It's not like it's just a picture of their jollies talking right now. I I'd rather talk.
okay. Well now I want to go to no one wanna go to vegas and see a show yeah, it's it's! It's a fun shop, I'll go back and do it. I I can't do a long stretch now. Look how much fun
as in to not have to worry about selling. Take it as read that if your single and you there and although served to slay people single and they're all from fuck in different parts of the world,
If none of them were interesting to me not like the old guy on the cat is sort of slay once have, but I did have for travel channel and I had to jump off like a three story: dive off of the balcony of the pot into the thing, and they were, everyone was like in great fucking shape.
Yeah, there's a taxicab right, so here yeah. This is the end. This is it. Everybody doesn't look like that.
It should be on the stage
No, not yet it's close to it, though it's got. How other all moving like that. At this point,
see the leading us up one about age? I would have been in the middle of all this trying to get around all these people watch a movie. She that yeah,
imagine me weaving my way through this in real time,
it's scary and fast, because you're almost bumping into people simultaneously thinking what does the contract say? Do they have to pay
as for the other three nights or shows, even though I should have measured the comics in the middle of this and you just
I think you know any of the dads, the damsel now and then on the front of the stage alone now that this year they all start retreating stuff, but it was here. Oh, it was scary.
It was. I have this exact angle, but with me screw it up.
okay now now he's on top of the taxi. So is he going to call the comic out? Well, let's see if he does maybe Brad's get all this lady's got to get in the way of just doing it. Okay, cool! That's perfect!
for beginner about closely the com, is binding ass. If you want to do
We are going to be able to reach out to, but what does it?
desperate, if I say who I wanted, whose bond cancer wanted open at some of the mobility below muskie gender now should do ask ginger what to do.
yeah, give you don't. I really now should do tyrant loved to do. I had arbitrary garbage. Are you garbage who's out their fuckin amazing there? I just had a monitor on sundays burning today, their pockets is awesome. They basically go through and ask you
those two questions that define whether or not you are garbage or not ha, and it's fucking funny shit. I did your toys. I chose the best,
just did how we dolls. I came out today he's great I'd like to do to bears. Is it ever three bears? No,
as ever- to bears in a jew, no okay to bears, but whether we always need
guess, bear some. Obviously I would love to do like a rogan. I'd love to do
who mama's house.
Your mama's out your mama's house. Nobody knows
well. What did we
I on that? What do we make? We made a oh yeah, the fucking shitty meat. What's it called haggis haggis, yeah well I'll hit up some. When are you in Austin? Next I'll have to go to Austin to this part of the fucking gig? Ah detection.
Double up into rogan. I think it would have me audible, using publish rogan so booked up. The EU
And trying to get on rogan model, I usually I is different because I'm usually doing it with
Tom or our ear of doing the outlaws year, legacy minute yeah, but but even still like I'd. I am a little called
Is that how busy he is so, if, like I have, if I have a special coming out I'll call him the second one,
find out yeah
and tell him, but silicates he's I mean he's. I remember some of them some of the saying they're trying to get him to do that because they wanted to promote the special and he was booked out for like two months, while he's booked out with fucking, like huge guess, huh
Everyone yeah, it's amazing, he's a little hard to get as a comic these days, I think and but Tom's a great podcast. Your mom's house is a great podcast and if you time it right and Tom's there,
You do be a guess, bear on low or when I'm not there. Oh nice he's,
he annoying to think he does Tom talks anymore. Does he does she do Tom talk still was last one year ago you start to item talks
and who am open or I'll do any of em. I actually joy at age. You know it's interesting is that they're all differ
yeah I did harlin's yesterday it such a device harland call harlem yeah, yeah human mind me to he. Did he really?
If he ran into the store- and he was like we'll do a podcast I was like yeah- definitely have just been so fucking busy, gotta,
new mine at some point yo when, when dying each
I'm back in mid february, yellow storage space it out away a button. You know yeah. This is fine
I'm glad you did this body. Thank you very much. Thank you. I appreciate this episode
Transcript generated on 2023-07-11.