I sit down in the mancave with Ron Funches to talk about Ron growing up in Oregon, Halston and Rons connection to their home town, having a son with autism, and Rons best day ever.
Check out my new friend and "shoe guy" on instagram @angelo_Blano and order some new shoes from him!
This episode is brought to you by Hims. A one stop shop for hair loss, skincare, sexual wellness, for men. My listeners get a trial month of everything you need to keep your hair – for just $5. Just go to www.forhims.com/bertcasted
This episode is also brought to you by Blue Apron. To get $30 off your first order with free shipping go to https://www.blueapron.com/bertcast
This episode is also brought to you by Zip Recruiter. Try Zip Recruiter for free today by going to www.ziprecruiter.com/bertcast
This episode is brought to you by MVMT watches. For 15% off, free shipping, and free returns go to www.mvmt.com/bertcast
For all TOUR DATE & MERCH click HERE: http://www.bertbertbert.com To Follow me on.. Twitter: https://twitter.com/bertkreischer Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/BertKreischer Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bertkreischer/?hl=en Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/Akreischer
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Did you know, there's a growing movement of people choosing to live a paper based lifestyle, they're called paper. Terrence
and they proudly choose paper because of its positive impact on the forests and the environment. Here in the: u s, paper companies work with private forest landowners to grow and maintain for us, at a rate, nearly double the volume needed to make the paper packaging and boxes. You rely on every day in those products.
Can be recycled up to seven times during the movement
and go paper terry and learn more at how life unfolds dot com slashed paper tyrian
hey guys, ready by guest
ro quickly, bang up some towards aids. For you, I'm in grand rapids. More
Sixty them are the l, a marathon march eighteenth sacrament, upon
Twenty second do. Twenty fourth, and
only a broadway in lexington ducky, wise guys in utah, the nineteen to twenty first of April zany.
In nashville. The set with you you'll find me. I am off this week to go tape, my special yet in philadelphia. I am super fucking excited. Ah, yes, we are doing it for netflix, and I- and I'm couldn't be happier about that- it is a it is a it is. It's awesome has been a goal. I was a goal I set of mine,
A year ago after I did my last special- and I said you know I really want to do. Is she a netflix special because of one thing I heard? Was everyone saying yo man? I can't watch your special. Everyone said that and then people say why didn't you just do it netflix? Will they didn't offer to me the last time showtime was kind enough to offer me a special but us modern uk I had egg whites go up my nose area, yeah how'd that happen, eat them too fast. Did you eat them so fast? You sucked them up. Your nose know I feel like
throw up loads of those in my throat won't get some water. I hear a little fucking out here. Does it clears your throat? I hope that didn't I don't know if I can even own a dog what happened grow. Is it like this?
or is it like the sardine bone or the anchovy bone your throat ou year ago, so yeah, I'm shooting my special. I hope you guys enjoyed that. That will not be special
If god made, everything that can go wrong will go wrong today. I hurt my back in therapy and I got egg whites up my nose. How did you get it up? You know cause. I was eating too fast. I was breathing
wrong, snotty sag, no, nor through my nose snorted it like I was breathing and when
mine in my nasal cavity as breathing, so that some problems as a problem, some really excited for this week,
good me, too yeah the whole good girls are coming out and, and I'm super excited, that's all I can say Philly get ready, haven't changed anything about my the way I approach a week of work. I didn't I that's why I did that in the past and I always regretted it cause. I felt like I made it too precious and I didn't make it precious. I run this hour of ton of you see me on the road you've seen the hour and I'm ready. So I'm ready to do it. It's going to be great
progress has brought you buy. Hymns hymns is for me, one stop shopping for men. I know I use their minoxidil
and I'm getting on be financed, read the that, basically, is that he is the the ep, be it's. The people will be the ba. Does the generic forman act exotic, sometimes an exact I found out? I take some other thing. Yes, the generic Eric
generic just as good in last december, the v medicine for restaurants function. The patent just came off, so it's open game so help
so now, it's going to be offered in generic form and that's where you can get it at hems? You don't have to go to the doctor. It's so fucking embarrassing to go to a doctor and be like
so anywhere you. I know you
I got an email from somebody from the last read from hymns. A wife sent an email thanking you for talking about hymns because she didn't know about it and her husband had been having erectile dysfunction problems and he was really embarrassed to go to the doctor, and she said I this. This gave her husband hope and he was so excited after
If finding out about him, so it's really great yeah and they have medical grade. Medical doctors, real licensed doctors that you go on. You answer a few quick questions and totally confidential, and then the product is shipped directly to your door. You don't have to like alma by the way. I don't have problems when we were talking about this, but I do have problems getting my dick hard
my problem. Is it gets too hard too much? That's why I'm getting on the fluster? It gives you sexual problems, I'm gonna hope so. But but this is it's not don't. Think of erectile dysfunction. Is your dad's disease all my buddies, my summer months are their names, but a lot of my buddies always take a pill with them when they go out and party, and I can't wait to start using them because I heard that you just fuck like a beast, ha yeah we're not using that I'm going to fucking
Yeah he's talking about how know about that. So here's the deal if you have hymns is for you hair loss, and these aren't herbal supplements, hair loss, erectile dysfunction, one stop shopping, go to hymns. If you want to fix your hair loss like I did, get in front of the bus and and
I started using propecia like or not propecia minoxidil
try using Minoxidil and twenty two years ago, twenty five years ago about- and I start air- and I know from friends who stopped using it and other hair fell out.
In front of the bus get in front of us with all this go to him. Here's a call to action, okay, try
for a month today for just five dollars what the fuck as crazy or five dollars. That is right,
that's right. I mean today for a month for just five dollars, we'll get you started for five bucks. While supplies last see the website for full details, this would cost hundreds of dollars. That is true. If you went to a pharmacy or a doctor, gotta hymns, dot, com, slash bert costed, bert cast it be archie, see a s. T e g for hymns, that's hymns that forums, as is the website. F, o r h. I m s: dot com, slash bert, cast it for him,
dot, com, slash burt casted. Did you get that guy's got five bucks one month? Five bucks is amazing, multiplies laws are not gonna last long, but get in front of the guys and don't be embarrassed. If you can your deckard, does they got a pill to fix it? Is
I guess what I can't go to bed, what do things more, embarrassing, not being able to go to bed laying up with panic, attacks or not getting your dick hard? Oh god, I'd much rather have the fucking dick problem just appeal,
Take vale fix it, take a pill if you lose your hair, get in front of that girl for him skies. This podcast is also brought to you by
blue apron. Okay, I have a quick story. While you were out of town, we made chicken fettuccine with, and I thought it was amazing by the way, but I laugh comes walking up to the stove cause, we're making a plague so we're gonna watch a movie while we're eating or blue apron. She goes and is this blue apron and I go yeah she. She said what
This is a zucchini she's, ok for blue apron, I'll give it a try. She did. I was so angry because I've been trying to get her to eat gaining forever. She loved it shed a ton of it. Are you sure? Yes, blue apron? Is awesome, it went for us, it's affordable, it's fresh. It comes right to your door and we have these it. It is our family
they say a family, the cooked together states together and no joke. I really think blue apron brunner family closer together. I know I get more
from my blue apron reads: god love him so much, but it is the one one sponsor that I mean is
pst, so in our life that it is almost creepy a while know that they're not the one sponsor, but they are very much in our life. I mean it's, it's fantastic. I can't wait to get it on our doorstep. Every tuesday evening they offer three different plans. The two person meal plan, which serves two people. You choose from eight new recipes per week, with choice of receding, either two or three or
these per week, the family, a plan which we do that serves for people choose from former recipes. I get the familiar plan anyway, crime. They left overs totally. Sorry, I'm cup still choke.
And the wine plan six bottles of wine from renown. One makers delivered monthly was he were recipes. I got coming up there. You know all the stuff that, if you dont knowest often yeah is your first on us in the world
ghost they're, cheap everything's under ten dollars per person. They you can make it in forty five minutes. Last super flexible high quality delicious I mean here the meals coming up strip steak with potatoes, spicy maple, collard greens.
who are due to their stakes are phenomena here. They are that I love the way they had sent me. They tell you how to make them and I swear to god. You never fuck it up. You never fox up, and then you can apply that when you're thinking other things is really great by sea job.
MR fraud, vegetables and jasmine rice. This is the
well. I've been waiting for, haven't gotten yet soy glaze,
korean rice cake with broccoli in soft boiled egg
cause. I love soft boiled eggs, so I'm waiting for them to teach me how to make a soft boiled egg and then I'll just make them all the time. Yeah. We haven't gotten that creamy foose leni fusilli fusilli, fusilli pasta.
I eat pasta with fried rosemary and walnuts. I don't read real. Well, I'm a horrible reader anyway. Here's the call to action, guys blue apron is treating burt cast listeners to thirty dollars off your first order. If you visit blue apron dot com slash broadcast
so check out this week's menu and get thirty dollars off of blue apron dot com, slash bert, gast, blue apron, a better way to cook. I was probably that was probably my most casual non gagging.
their cock, red blue, ably. Maybe I will I really do love louis
and check him out its great weight, or is it really does change your life? I really do believe that this package is also
brought you by the hiring every business he's great people and a better way to find them some
better than posting your job online, unjust, praying the right people see it
Could I knew there was a smarter way to do this, so they
multiplatform that finds the right job candidates for you ziprecruiter
learned. What you're? Looking for identifies people with the right experience and invites them to apply to your job
limitations have revolutionised how you'll find your next higher. In fact, eighty per
employees who posted the job on if get a qualified get quality candidates through the site,
just one day and super doesn't stop there, may even
spotlight the strongest applications. You receive an you, so you,
never, miss a great match. The right candidates are out there. Ziprecruiter is how you'll find them. Isn't that right, Halston
businesses of all sizes, trust bit zip code of their irish right now. My listeners can tries it recruiter for free, that's right for free, go to zip recruiter, dotcom slashed burke cast that zipper cooler, dotcom, slash, bert, cast, zip recruiter, dot, com, slash
bert, cast zip recruiter the smartest way to hire a love when these reads got like a great like thing yet so.
an email from a fan the other day. I thought it was cool shit.
Sean Mcardle, congratulations by the way sean. I should have waited for that to the end. But alright, I just wanted to thank you for movement watches at 'em. The m t watch discount. I just used it to buy my groomsmen and myself. I just use it to buy watches for my grooms.
and myself I can't read- I don't know you're not reading well today, I would have never known about movement watches if it wasn't for your awesome podcast. I'm excited for the new special and look forward to you beating Tom, that fat fucking piece of shit in a race sincerely Sean p s there'll be a seat for you at the wedding. If you want to come open bar just saying p p s tell Tom, there's no buffet so that fat fuck can't come. Thank you. Sean. Congratulations. Brother hit me up lug to text me the details on your wedding. If it's close by with them or am I, what am I coming in and having a cocktail, but this podcast is also brought to you by movement watches. Did you know that land? I didn't know that a movement, a movement watch I was hoping I would get land or violence
yeah. You guys have me talk about them and you know those two calls dropouts started there on watch company. Is companies grown like crazy and now almost too?
Two million watches sold in over a hundred and sixty countries you fucking agonizing, they re looking why
They continue to revolutionize fashion, on the belief that they shouldn't break the bank style shouldn't break the bank. Now it's so nice, like those texting with Russell peters, about watches
the other day cause I was like. I want to get a new watch and I was like I don't. I don't know if the way watches are these days exactly
I only poor watch to go out right now, like like I
he's a running watch all day, long right and then, if I'm gonna go to stand up. I put on a nice watch like a movement watching Anna
I don't know if I want to spend fifteen
thousand dollars for, though the three hours I'll use it right and move.
watches are beautiful. You got me an all black one yeah, I love it. It looks. It looks a lot like my running watch yeah, so it's very sleek there and I dunno. If you've checked out the styles lately on the site, but they've doubled. The number watch styles and they're still expanding movement watches has caught, has come far from being a crowd, funded, kids working out of a living room in the past year, they've not only introduced a ton of new watch collections for both men and women come on inland, but also expanded his sunglasses and fashion forward bracelets for her all yeah. You can get all the forge it there. Yeah
This is awesome. I think that's a cool thing is to not have to think about what a buyer spouse have so just go online. Squirrels girls, girls
scroll scroll use a discount code and fucking get it. And these days,
yeah watches are more an accessory, you know than a utilitarian item. They they really add something to your outfit. So for women is nice to have a variety of watches. These watches are all about. Looking good and keeping it simple, watches. Don't tell you how many of these watches don't tell you how many steps you've taken that are going to pull your wrist up with text messages
It is a fact that annoying thing that happens, we have a watch on. He added starts fuckin buzzing lies. I got an airing mine, really yeah, where my real watch now, because I couldn't I kept, I found that it was pulling my focus so much. I wasn't in present time. These watches are simple and they look good
so here's the deal movement watches start adjust. Ninety five dollars at a department store we're talking
five hundred bucks, but here ninety five dollars movement-
you're doubt that by selling online they were able to cut out the middlemen, lava, shit and, and
I had all that retail market providing the best possible prizes classic designs, quality, construction style memo middle, get, fifteen percent off with free shipping and free returns by going to em v.
t dot com slice broadcast see why movement keeps growing check out their expanding collections
Just go to m m v m t, dot com, slash bert, cast, join the movement
in the movement join them movement all right, how much time
on the red so far, helstone.
Alright. Well I'm going to try to keep these short. I know people have been saying we're too breathy yeah and I agree, but but yeah I'm just excited for the special, so I'll keep you posted
on when it's coming out and I'll. Let you know how it went next week, but as for as for this weekend, I'm emotionally tapped out right now after this is the last people piece of work I'll. Do I'm going to look at shirts for my special, because I have to have a shirt to walk on stage to eating and I want to look at new jeans cause. I think these genes have beat up and I got a guy dropping off kicks and
you are going to give a shout out to this kid. He thought I'm going to he's coming by today. He got Angelo here. What's his name Angelo bland, do check them out on instagram. It's
g, yellow, underscore, b, l, a andy, oh and he's bring a movie shoes, and he
the are the reason I'm bringing this up he's on instagram. So, if you're into sneakers, he can check out his instagram, he posts shoes all all the time and then he can buy them directly from him and he's out of chicago. But he's always in l. A new york and the reason I bring this up is because today's guest is how I found out about him. I was looking at ron, funchess instagram and he had a pair a picture with him with new shoes, and I was like others are cool shoes,
and then he was like. This is my buddy who hooks me up with shoes, and so I went oh, I followed him just followed him as a lark and then he posted these jordans that had just come out that I
it's really really cool and he posted, and he said I have size thirteen. It's also hard to find size. Thirteen. So I hit him up and he's like. Oh I'm coming out to bring the shoes
cordelia and a week by what we talked about the honest by gas. A little bit as well is rotten. Crystal
the work together on undated evil, but
I dunno so anyway. I said. Oh, my god. If you haven't thirteen, I love him so he's bringing them out so so he'll be here we're going to shoot a video for my instagram pa, probably a little bit but today's guest. I met a long time ago. I met him backstage,
did you see be he's comedian? If you don't know who he is? If you don't know, is Egypt check him out? He's absolutely hilarious,
is probably one of the nicest guys in the business, and I met him back.
He was getting high. He's got a good giggle. Like me, we did Doug, loves movies and then
I'd run into him now and then and then one day I ran him to the airport and he was in great shape and I was I gave him a hug. I think I was a little buzzed by give them a hug was early in the morning and he was like he was like. I did not see that coming and I was like, but he's just he's. Just as you'll hear by isn't tone and inflection he just such a soft grey guy, but he's
hilarious comedian he's been online data bull, he had another show, either
I dunno, but it was pretty interesting. As we start this podcast off halston said. I have a funny ron, funchess story and I was like save it for the podcast and so too,
turns out. Holstein Enron ron went to the same funeral. I strongly that from the same hometown, but is a story
the pike, it's all about your land, although it so but I but so listen up, listen up
I love you guys mama hard copy of a fantastic weak shot out to everyone who tells me there store
of what they do? Other listen listeners, pike ass. I love that makes me so
happy to know that
you allow me to be in your ear, for I know an hour.
or to while you're work. So I hope you have a great weak
I certainly would have it so that our front door
angelo asthma. Bland does here. He was just dropping off my shoes, I mentioned in the in the intro to this round, bunches podcast that I
I found you through instagram on
on these criminals, like oh shit and so just followed you and then you put on one-
own one of your stories. You're like oh, I have these in a size, thirteen I was like. I want them now and then
at me, I'll be like. Oh, my god, then you were like. I can't believe you follow me and I was like. Are you fucking kidding me right, and so so you just
some of was asking really interesting. Question has explained:
second minimal, just others into the beginning of the podcast. It won't be like a four hour interview
won't be that long. Just curious is waning,
sue game, how you got into it and how it works so
so I'm trying into them talk right now that might give your anal michael. Yes, my so nice,
years old. I've grow grew up in chicago on from chicago and basic.
Lee since I was younger. I was just buying and selling like anything I could ozone suckers and fifth grade. I was so in phones,
freshman year, all these different stuff, and then I started on shoes because it was just like a big thing and I, in a fashion, so
one thinking or another, and I message crystal leah and I said like hey man, if you ever need issues, let me know I'm a big fan and two days later he messages back and was like some super down like. Let me know you could get me and then start sending me stuff. So I was just like holy shit. This is a real thing going on and I flew out here and I met him. I would get a picture
other super nervous and and now they could now I've got a few times together, and
What about your own fighter and the kid the other day yeah, which that was crazy? It's so funny, because I follow you he's on fire during the kid and he goes. I got a shoe guy and also I was like. Oh that's so funny
I was in my head. I was like a kind of one issue. Guy
Now I was u guy, but I but I'd following you, and I saw that there was a big things because also weekend,
There was a break release of shoes. Yeah there was a ton of shoes that came out that we can and even like. These are one of them that have just like. I don't even know the past month has just been crazy with it, but I dunno go ahead:
we're just so so. So how did how like how leeann was asking go ahead and finish your questions that I interrupted and said: let's put this on the podcast, you were saying
what is it had it with a only release shoes in chicago ally, in your rights
One of these are just they're, just exclusive shoes in general, like some of these, like I was saying there is only one hundred and sixty pairs made of some of the shoes that I've had and then like these, in particular, there's like around twenty thirty thousand, and it's just.
You can only get them if you're in one of these three cities or if you know
well, the guy or whatever it is. So how do you get- and I happen to know- a ton of people in these boutiques like there's boutiques in chicago there's boutiques in l, a out here and they're the only places to get the shoes so when they get them, I'm just have a connection cause. I've been doing it for so long that I have access to of. Like basically anything you need, I can get really was the most
spence shoe you ve ever sold. I sold a pair of red topers. Those are, those are a nike and Kennedy was shoe. Those are like six thousand dollars
wow. Now I think there are. There are even more now. Oh yeah mean nikes yeah, it's crazy. I have a pair in my house that they're called a hyper adapt. Those are the ones I was telling you guys. Those are made for nike friends and family. Only and those are like one of two hundred
choose loud at least to my knowledge, so yeah there's that gets crazy out there. I mean it's like essential.
it's like drug dealing except the legal version which, like I mean
That's fine by me, like I will,
Never like the kids and my high school. They would I'll just say like what you just said we'd, because he was made more like
it's way easier, there's more of demand, and it was true at the time but I've
ever been like? I never smoked, never drank. I never more like a clean cut person so carefully been you're nineteen years old yeah. I know
pre smart zol, oh and what I want to say is that, like when I came to meet crystallise the first day, I'm standing outside so carefully
story very quick knowing outside and it was then I think it oxnard like levity live comedy. Colombia might be right to try and
I I'm standing outside and there's a huge line of people waiting and now I'm like to some dick head with, like five bags of shoes,
standing out there like waiting so onto a messaging criminals, a hey like I'm here and he didn't see a chasm shoes
busy like he was in the green room or whatever. So I walk up, and I tell the person at the door. I was like hey I'm here for chris and they're, like yeah, ok,
like everybody says annals, acknowledge checklist. They checklist
it was not a list, and now all
the people. I know I'm gonna make fun of me. I could lay cruises get two years, then click send out there for ten minutes
Chris walks on everybody's, a holy shit has again, I told you guys, like Alice,
politically we saw there was interesting eleanor. All of this is just like a knowledge is crazy senior with you to meet hemmed function.
Samuel outward so punches. Anode attacks it with robert SAM salmon. I would like you, we should do a toolbar gassed, he's, I'd love to get in
your brain, who obsession with shoes, because I it is, it is fun. It's like you, don't get many treats as a guy, especially if you perform short.
us, where the only thing that can really accentuated your shoes,
is the male handbag,
and so so now runs on the pike today. What kind of shoes like what would you
what kind of shoes people are into or is it just like anything? Now I mean like with brown and all of them, it's like, I can do know like. I know what ryan likes it
he likes and when it and I know it, deletes likes.
when we are like the easiest heel. He did like easy. Now is a kind of like those are. Do she so it's not
so I know and he loves richer ones. Like he's kind of like me, we kind of the same style, but you I mean it.
Like whatever I guess I'll, just send them pictures and like a group chair which will probably be added
your plea and address. They were, and sometimes we actually sometimes. I feel like. I'm being annoying. No, like I pick up, shoot a lot, but it's just like they like it, so
As long as sam was like SAM was like yo bro, you can't have a respectable collection without seamounts. All black cements yeah he's like blacks,
and I was like- don't even know what they are, then it's like the like best show of all time, one of them, oh for real yeah. That's like the I think. Snapchat did some little thing.
And lucas complex? They said like the top ten shoes of all time. That was the number two really was number one. This. The shoe that I'm wearing right now is the top three lists in black and red is like the bread one desk
first jordan, that I remember that war yeah he got the nike had to pay five thousand dollars every single game. For Michael Jordan, aware those it's like yeah, they have a cool story behind them, because they're called the banned ones.
who's, gonna coil yeah. I was obsessed and they start making them was with nike s, bees low dunks. I think they are. They don't make em up
it'll make them. I I can't even find them online yeah I mean that's and that's the other thing. That's actually good. For me is like a ton of people message me and say like I want these, I want these whatever upcoming releases, but another thing that I do is like. If you were to text me and say I want to nineteen. Eighty five, like Jordan, shoe that suggests original is a collector's thing that go for like five
those are my. I can also get any of that stuff as well. So it's really like. If you need a new release, I could get em if you want something that's from ten twenty thirty years ago, like jazz,
so wow so- and I know there's guys that, like there's one guy
I saw a thing about him and there were like yahoo just deals with wrappers
and then another other kids. Just deals with sports stars
come into sports are really no enable wrap. It was the most honest I want you.
You say you are going to give up. Our will enable sports are really care about sport, gauze, and so you don't really fuck with sports guys in
seem to be any comics, and you see
dialogue and on all the comics. I know that's like that's: what's crazies when they first started posting pictures of me, it was, I think, sam lerner and Daniel levy, the producer of gold bergs. When I flew out there, they like brought me into sony, and it was just like
crazy. Like all of this, like I'm saying, is unreal and old. Then they brought me in and they took pictures with me- and I didn't even ask them to say this. They just said like the hollywood sneaker plug and that seemed so cool to me cause I was like, let's I dunno just like. Oh, it seemed like a really cool
nickname, so they start economy that and then one guy message me vlad come on,
his name is. I know him yeah. He does a youtube channel. Yeah he's. I think he does like youtube and he's a he's still doing stand up. Like comedy at, I think he goes to the I dunno the comedy store down here in the lab and stuff like that, and he message me and he said, like I saw you from SAM's post and all this stuff. So it's just crazy how like how many people are seeing it just from one guy that I got into unlike the kid that you're talking about.
I know you're talking about, and that is probably the same thing he only sells to sports cars he's probably really into sports. Like one day I like, I don't even want to be
selling shoes. My whole life it's kind of dislike. It should just works so like in the future, like my idea of it being a nineteen year old kid that didn't go to school and was a fucking idiot high school. My ideas like I've. If this is the way I could get like my network out there and get
no people like you and crystal clear and people that idolize then one day if I won-
beyond the comedy industry or the entertainment industry, like I can
it will know that like
You guys are my teachers and I'm going to school. I already want to steal you out of the shoe game.
you in as a man
you're, an agent working like you there, the
territorial ship that goes into the ice.
Fear of making money off selling reselling shoes to people is genius. It really is genius and the fact that you hustled it to the point where you know like, unlike like when you texted back, I was like oh fuck cool. You know that
Well, that's just overwhelming well yeah and most of the people that so I mean there's a ton of kids that are selling shoes right now, but kind of the kids that, like there's two ways to do it like. I could have gotten the message from crystal leia
and be like awesome. Here's a celebrity with a ton of money. I could just fuck him on the price and make a quick two hundred bucks, which is what most kids are going to do like they'll, just ship the pair out and that's it. But for me I would rather take a loss and tooth
now as fly out you're the next day, get your being be whatever I have to do and build a relationship because that to me as way more valuable than a hundred
profit on making a pair of shoes yo, and you can make so much money off of crystal clear
No, what is lacking is a cash cow right now I am wrong punches. They print fuckin money
He lives that yeah. That's that's! Fucking overwhelming give any more questions. Leon
now you're gonna change. Would you want Leon? I don't know how many women do do women. There is like all taboos that are really comfortable. I think she just got a pair. I just bought. I bought a pair
ultra can sell you a pair of size, nine or by them I buy, and I saw which we just bought geo parents are like them. She was like ugh.
no. You know you really should a landed as a whale, and I mean that literally and figuratively is signora eyes
because the girl is a fucking shoe guy, I'm trying to get like, I know that I'm also a big fan of bill burr and I know bill burr, like fuckin reps, on sneakerheads, so
I was gonna message him, those just messaging people on instagram. Now, let's get him
such an one day, and I take it out like hey but like bill. Like huge fan of you love your podcast, would you like be interested in any
makers and I like deleted isaac. What the fuck, like ironing, know the answer to this dossier. I saw, but it would be like you,
So the him there's another like dane cook I would want to sell to I mean anybody,
Isn't it only sell to it's like I want to meet them sewing is like the part that
You know I mean you, you wanna do comedy at all, or do you want to do?
to be in the entertainment business. What do you want to do after shoes?
on trying to build a u to channel right. Now. I've done stuff like on snapchat, like because I was up. I was popular in school for being like myself and like being kind of an asshole to the teachers and stuff
I wasn't like mean to them. I would just like not be interested I'd be sent on my phone and then I get kicked out of class, so I have liked as booklet of eighty six
tension slips that I was reading off my snapshot and then they said, make a youtube video. So, like I made a youtube video and the first week I got lake like four
honoured subscribers I was doing like it was ok and so on
and to build that up comedy as like a youtuber would be cool, but, like I dunno, if I have the balls to do it as like stand up which maybe when I'm older, I will cause I'm only nineteen or fuck
I dunno but yeah I I want to be in it. I just kind of find my spot. You know what I mean
Well, maybe we can get you me. You and SAM roberts do a sneaker podcast yeah. I mean that would be huge, I'm all for
and I feel like I'm not like that. Much of a shy person like just
know you're doing very well, my boss, yeah I mean I dunno. I'm gonna be shy to do what you're doing to people and go hey. I got some cool sneakers when I've been like yeah, I mean I've been so unselfish,
little. So when I was at school, I would just like run out the back door.
Some random guy shoes and then come back in and then get a detention.
I cry. While I made one hundred and fifty bucks today so yeah, why don't you start selling stuff so early or you like? Did you want money for a certain thing or nose? Just like I like
was like. I went to school and I had a lot of friends and it was later
like there were so many people that would do things that I wasn't interested in likes
morgan weed and like all that stuff- and it was just like my if I wonder
I meant I d like drink, drink beer and like
try to cool in front of my friend and I was sick fuck that, like
im just going to sit at home and figure stuff out so then I started. Fixing phones was my first thing after selling suckers in like grade school, so I was fixing phones and then it just came to shoes, because I guess I've just been a huge fan of them. I actually bought my dad a pair and when I was like fourteen and he didn't want 'em so as a gokhale just saw him on Ebay and then I profited from it, and that was one of like a personal like holy shit selling shoes is a thing
but I've bought a lot of shoes on Ebay yeah. I like where the especially the nike sb is where I couldn't get a hold of him anymore right and I liked wearing them. I see I'm not. I don't.
I don't mind wearing them until I wear. I wear them right, but I have a pair of adidas that he knows a big shoe. Guy is Adam devine, oh yeah, he's already is yeah he's a he's. He should get hooked up with and get tells the latest set you up with them and it's like
Even that's the thing is that I live in. Ask these people to do like you could ask you and silly cake dimension mean it like that, but I don't like to cause it's like. I don't know roland atom of brain out what it was. I sought always cm it. There's a sneak, replaced
in long beach or think in long beach, monotonous.
anyway, I'd see him go in. If I've see him going to sneaker places like two or three times right and he's like how they got this new shoe out, I want to grab it
and he showed me these. Not these adidas I'll show
and I haven't my thing and they're my favorite shoe I've ever warned that and do the the air pegasus eighties yak julia bottles from
he commented. I saw you posted a picture and you said like Nike sends me these ad, like all that, but those are those are great though I like those, it's been fucking around with the girl, because the dita sends him shit,
Tell him that I'm sponsored by night gears and listen. I don't know how I work with like. If I sold him shoes, he probably can give me like he won postman's page.
I mean or, like you wouldn't be able to say, like a well. This guy hooked me up. You think he would know why. I recall you don't think you'd be in conflict with adidas. Well, that's what I was thinking like. Maybe she doesn't even like this guy, I'm with you one second I'll call. Him is probably going to be eating cake a second while you calling him right now.
Hey you're on my you on my podcast for two seconds, and so don't say yet so don't say the n word and hey I
Can you still fuck with nike- is what you are not easily done when nike
hey? I got a great shoe guy. If you need me shoes, his name's angelo bland,
as ever my house right now, so let me
If you need anything I'll, go I'll link you guys up.
I know you get all your swipe. Free metallic,
it's. Alright I'll give you call later on. I leave tomorrow for billy,
by the arguments used. Toby he's the best man he's and he's making ridiculous money in spending at grazing arena, and for you guys, it's like in a way. The only stores down here that are the main stores like flakes
of stadium. Goods is like a couple of their once, but I walk in there and there's like these. Shoes are like five hundred bucks there, and I saw him all day for three hundred years. All like the p,
Well, that's why I guess I'm able to meet with you guys and like have something in common is because even for crystalline guy, that doesn't need to save fifty bucks when you're buying shoes like every week and when you're buying shoes that are limited. That are two thousand dollars that I could really save them like five hundred bucks per pair, then it's like way bigger, so there's more of a reason for them to come to me than to just go:
the street, and I mean it, saves time me being only ships out of its super ease. It was super easy to text with you in just go where we are today at noon or a great egg in which wants twelve thirty and it fits into my day perfectly.
Well, I appreciate you being on the progress report, though this up in front ron and-
will everyone will hit you up and increase your business and have you want me to like? Can I put like.
Where's instagram on here today of the message me so my instagram is at Angela
oh underscore blanda. So it's a
g e l, o underscore b, l, a n d o and that's about it, yeah awesome brother. Thank you so much for care. Thank you. What it does appreciate today's podcast, ladies and gentlemen, rom punches. The.
Do you
like me
One of our fellow human beings lyra why you are met in this?
I agree with you why I think I think you're the first guy,
out our garden like all the comics work in it, folkestone weight loss and you lost a ton away,
and I saw someone and by the way- and then I feel like we have a connection because
however, we had a hearing, one talk, shit about you, let's go and and
can't say ways the both really friendly comics wearily gettin, the guy
It's important to keep to keep them myself. Is people from talk touch to make them really hang out with me
yeah. I mean you need me. Ok, I there,
There s a manner
and then I saw that you taken wrestling lessons yeah the fuckin
Why, like you know, I think
start smoking lot upon lately. I'll, congratulate and- and I feel like I feel like it opened up like.
Things that would have been negative to me on.
on line when you go in like get office
can you see someone you like like a baby
old party. You would be like man look at that fucking house
there is car whatever yeah I'm seeing the opposite side when I get high.
When I get high, it's just changing your perspective is bringing out the positives in you, yeah, and I saw I saw you on the on doing rest
when I won't even high, but I, but I think that is lenient. I I'll fucking bad ass, how
all that you're like doing X.
Actually what you want to do tat! No! Thank you.
It has been a dream of mine since was a
had been my whole evident, really have many interests. Besides,
in the comedy, and I was in the wrestling and I thought, like I didn't think, either was an actual job. You know so I avoided doing both. I was just working at like a bank and in doing that type of shit and
I had. I lost a friend who do dido last year like a brain tumor, and then he he he passed and he kind of just was like. Oh you, you know you.
Samuel, same oboe, you're, just lay a life, is your legs. Some uganda
at any time, so I might as well do the things I want to do so. I was like oh might as well train for for trained for wrestling, something I've always been interested in and it's nice to do something where there's no goal for me. There's no, like I don't plan to go into wwf or anything.
I then it and it even when I started comedy had already had my son. So there was never this thing of late, I'm just
am fun and doing it? I was like no. I need to be successful because I want to feed this kid, so it's nice to have something, and I'm like. Oh I'm just doing this because I fucking love it. This is what I'd like to do
I gotta get out of here. That's an interesting segue into halls than in the back
so while somewhere you go ahead and to run your story. Tell me your story. I was at wilwood risk funeral. You were at his funeral, I was, I grew up in a little town called Dallas Oregon, okay, yeah.
that's where william spent a lot of time worked at that dominoes yeah. I worked at the dominoes for three years. Jake frazier story. I yeah it was a good friend of mine yeah for a long long time I knew will, since I was in high school because he worked with, he was like a manager of the
of a band and yeah I've, uganda, zig headway, music and so I've noticed and high school and then turn twenty one.
working at the dominoes with him and we we ve been very
for a really really long time, and I know a bunch of stories about you guys and how he was kind of instrumental in the beginning.
of your success in the beginning of your abhorrent.
A career and in his mom and
and yet let me stay in his moms babies. Tell me about this guy, ok, so
as well. Woodruff
He is a weird do our young very. Where do you think he was races?
why? Why do you always said the n and public yeah for as long as you know, no yeah
we enjoy it, so it's a hold on hold on hold on hold on, let's slow roll, this so already my heart, I have a friend of a friend, I won't say his name. Who is when we were
almost as aim out of respects. I wouldn't want people hearing this thing in the wrong thing he does. I have only his name is
sounds like a black bands name and our freshman year of college. They had segregated the dorms so that there was white or white white floors and black floor stairs what duds and he got put on a black floor and just was integrated very quickly into the black floor like he he was
black dude from like and he's the widest. This fucking guy looks like larry bird everyone that grew up with me knows what I'm talking about, but he is.
Always use the edward word not a negative, but in like a conversational kind of way, whether
was more in a negative way
Everything was a joke to everything over rethink numbers.
Usually awkward to the extreme, that's where they would be like he would just like. If he, if you, if he met you,
This measure that day in just met you and your wife, you say you have with asian, he would say some joe
two you really high and say some joke about your wiping dogs is a legacy.
And it's just he's not racist he's, not racist. He's not sexes he's one of the most open minded. People who I'd ever met in my life and one to us again
I didn't have a place my options when he thought about.
being detrimental to mike comedy career. He absolutely was low, is getting worse.
In separate from my wife. My options at that time were that I could go live with my mom
in my mom's rules in chicago, where that I'm gonna get a regular job, and I was going to do comedy on the weekend and I was like what that land,
just now, starting to and tread new commonly, four five and six years at that time and
and then the other asian values like what you can come.
However, my mama's basement, you can come split. The Mahars bay
man with me and you come stay there and I stay there and
barely paid any ranten Genji causing the track.
take me out, and I did hear them up stairs fighting about. How is he he she couldn't take me out.
No undue colony gaze together and just as the swedish do, but you would think a meaning chest. Chess captain
fought a ball team work.
domino deal poker.
Indeed comedy that that was his life. He didn't have like a real real job ever like that was his. He just did he figured out how he did what he wanted to do lived pretty much in a little hobble
for as long as I've known them in, but we'll just give you
wherever you need it like it. I always I consider myself a great friend
and now they gave you're. My friend, if I have a dollar you have fifty cents will was. The type of do is like oh,
if I'm your friend and I have a dollar, you have a dollar and if you need a dollar fifty, I will drum up that other fifty cents for it yeah, and so I was like that's not good for you that the person people will take advantage of him and things like that, but he was just one I mean again. I mean I I'm surprised, but not surprised, you're at that funeral because, like
However, there were people there who I love their people
hu. I hated the there of just of people. There was not a comedy club in Oregon we're coming up and this is a place called.
capitol theatre and in oregon, and then the dominoes came through with free catering for the funeral, which I had never seen before in my life shout out to Joe Frasier, yes yeah jake and I it was just definitely one of the funny the the funniest
Well, I've ever been to
aldi pass. I pretty funny
brain tumor. Anyone gets
eritrea get a removed
everybody was worried about him. Everybody talked to my aunt, taught him and a little bit, because our relationship will kind of go back and forth, sometimes where I could feel like he
all the things I wanted. He wanted. You know, and so there's like a little bit of like oh, you went and did this and I'm still kinda here, but I mean, when did when I went to the funeral, and I talked to his like nice and I talked to them family members and they talked told me how they always watch every episode of like powerless and on datable and all the shit that I had been on and, like I didn't know that cause we didn't really talk about that like. I would occasionally like send them some money or just be like hey, what's up but like that. That was had been a relationship at that time and we found out that he had a brain
tumor, and so then everybody, you know, started to rebuild relationships and we talked- and we had this long conversation about how he didn't he wasn't going to be bitter anymore and that he wanted to be a fucking, positive dude and he just
the positive and a lot of things and you just have to get it off his chest and then he goes surgery comes out
Two days later, he posted on twitter that I made it out. I'm alive. The next day dies really hasn't yeah. He joked about this brain tumor, the entire time that he knew about it by the way. Oh yeah, everything was a joke to him, and he
I work at dominoes with him all. He had this, this brain tumor and- and he would say I can't do this. I can't put the cheese I have
brain tumor? Up to now I loved will woodruff and have not yet very long. Time said, you know that you're in gas there
There is no sir, no sir, I play a shows with no says yea
I had my band and they had those, and this was when I was in high school. I actually I played guitar with gnosis for a little bit, but yeah I've known long story, short known for a very long time. He he talked only good things about you. I never heard anything bad. He never said anything bad about you and I don't think he
I genuinely said anything bad about anyone really and unless he was choking yes, fucking shit he's talking mad shit you're out there yeah. It says a lot about his character about. If, if, if he had a dollar, then you would a dollar too, because I I know I'd I've been there. You know- and I just think that the people cross paths with him were really lucky to have known him, and I just think that it says a lot because he always let his inner child play and that's something that I think a lot of people might strike.
with. Maybe not comedians, but just people in the real world. You know he was always playing yeah and that's what I loved I loved hanging out with him. Yes, he was always playing cs and always shouting
here I will allow always rick rolling. I sang couldn't say good day. Sir, do you like fucking will is for them to wait
path tat. You need to be doing the job wages there was really was cat. Jos fuckin, just
well what I learned a lot from will bessie doing colony. Where am I started?
Call me with him in this other headliner, who was more like a shitty dude.
Is that that's the story? I was yeah, I won't say his name, but it was definitely a class
It's a headliner learning experience where I was married at the time too and I'd have to be like, and I was like married. I didn't I wasn't doing anything and not that anybody.
The fuck them see it were than have any other way, but this do we lay we just be waiting in the parking lot, while he's fuckin head,
member, with the way in the parking lot while he held was referred to as a lesbian.
seeing contest between him and his lady in the audience and their girl. Her her girlfriend was the judge and they go back.
Can form is going down this lady and she was
it is I who is better at it, because his beard was about how well he could he percy, and so we,
the way for that for a few hours at the way I wish I knew this guy was those guys, though those those
there's some bye, bye, perfect circle called Judith, but now I get that cat on,
but called Judith. Another line in there that I used to apply to me working with headliners in your such
an inspiration for away that I never ever want to be here, and I let out I feel like theirs.
So much then headlines like a try to do the,
said I try to show people the things that like like like.
Cigarette. I was told about this, but like tipping out your feature, act here
and explaining to them what what
appropriate about is what your
I tell them what I make
tell them like this is how much money I'm making. This is
I'm telling you out this is
and people shouldn't tip you out this way,
people should, mrs how headlines works like one of them.
I mean,
I don't know, I'm I and I knew it. I knew people made money on the road, but for a very long time I thought like six
and was the most can make on the road, and I knew people made more than that. I know I knew that. I was aware of that. I just
was under. The impression that that is all I ever see was six grant
and dumb automatic sharing that
your future act and its theirs.
Much too featuring. That is changed a lot you know like when I was
nigeria to sit back and watch headliner and they kindly go
I can give them notes and tell them stuff they liked. It was all about stand up, you got done and then you are in the green room. There is no meet and greet you are in the green room and you were talking about the act and things have changed so fucking,
much. When did you start
I started with two thousand and three yeah yeah, I think waiting, but maybe two thousand and five. I gotta think how old is my son he's fourteen? I started when he was three so do that map, I'm not good with math how old your song fourteen
you're given to at fourteen years. I know I've been doing it eleven years. Oh, oh, you started when he was three yeah okay, I was like my daughter's thirteen.
You haven't, you heard him of. You were living in portland as women in an salem argon. Yes, m organ. How do you get there? We born
well. The guy did you end up in now I was I was born here. I was born in gardena for real and my dad and my mom split and my mom moved to Chicago. So I ended up in Chicago and my mom was like in like a real negative. Like abusive relationship.
we're a bunch of years and it just wasn't going well for me, I starting to like fight the dude, but it was messing with my school work, and things like
that and my dad got back into our life, so I ended up moving and he was in construction. There's a big construction boom in Oregon, and so I ended up. That's how I moved out. We who died to Oregon. You see you, you seem. You know. I hope yours
open the books? I think you are, but every time I look at you seem like youth. You seem like you, you shoulder hardship, very well, yeah like yours. I endorse your sons, autistic garden and and
Do you have the artistic right? My marriage is mile there as he gives all the real be ass. I see I watched you play with a bunch of. Are they are to secure its you're, so pace
it was on your instagram, maybe, and I just like it,
one of those things again that may my heart swell ranco does this do get? Did you buy wait the next day
saw you at the american airlines check in and I was I did the same.
Then I did you when I saw you today, I hold you and you're. Ok, I couldn't help, but I like it just it really kind of like you seem like a guy that rules with a very well yeah now definitely and has been my whole life. Yet here yeah now I mean I grew up in like a shitty area, Chicago
rough city and my mom was in a better relationship and need his kind. I learned
in fact of a lot. You know, and I just learned that I could
control my actions really what I was about- and I just learned to be really positive in that regard in, but you till you took that energy at all
most come food. It yeah cause. You darling
It goes multiple ways like my sister was affected the same ways, but she became really more strict and still studious, and just really she is a doctor and she was like she was like boom straight through school
straight to medical school, no snow stop and no breaks. No partying. You know that's what she was about and so for a while, especially when I was doing comedy it was a lotta, like your sister look at how good you are
this is due in havana. Utopia, we work and you get your shit together. You wangle father area for people like when I first met you
I was it was enough of that. I want to say, was do away with it
doug loves movies together, yeah, yeah, yeah and- and I was like, oh, it was almost frustrating there's a
people in the business at you me and you go
I said I wish there was a way to compartmentalize. As I said, this is Jim jefferies other day and he didn't really get it and I went no, but you got to
Get it like you understand what I'm saying is negative, but they're, so
naturally talented or so so, visibly talented that
as a regular, chronic like myself, whose just very lucky to make pay. The bills party goes further
ok and then, when you find out, the guy is a good guy. You're like mother fucker, you know what I mean and you were back there you're getting high on your own
in the fucking room with just effortlessly like it was effortless.
Those like and I met. I remember feeling like a real distance in the race of not there always world laughs but feeling a distance, a gap and watching you do it ever leslie. I told her to Jim Jeff,
As I said, you know, I watched your special the other day, so badly wanted to hate it, and he was like why I go cause. That's what as a comic
What you want to know that people's consent to look as I am,
in every show that I've sucked out and their vulcan painful.
and sometimes are important, and now I was
Jeffrey special any opens up the bill? Cosby joke and murdered me if food
lord me and I was like dude I live,
It is almost a best buy something. I've ever seen manuel favours puzzle. I've ever seen
he was. I would you wanted to socrates. I owe you know comics. You know that
We don't want them to you don't want to. I don't want to sit through an hour of bullshit yeah, but I I would I would love not to be jean.
Yes,
it is that I understand a bit. I know I mean I think a lot of it is like just the way I was raised and things born in and then natural trauma is where your is. Where you're like. Oh I'm,
It's like I've been train a lot of this training. I didn't really want to have you know to be able to deflect and make things funny. It was a way to survive. You know
It wasn't like this thing where you're like. Oh this,
This is gonna really help later.
It was more like no, I sound weird and girls don't earn into me. I didn't think I could they would be later be like. Oh you a bitch. You can be a jerk
an agreement on, did you ever try to sound different when you're young
Gerda Javert. Rather I would to a period.
I wanted to have a deeper voice yeah. I know my buddies called me on it now. I think, because I just learned to be funny when I was like twelve or thirteen is when I was like. Oh I'm, I'm funny, and this works when it gets me out of trouble. It gets me out of bad situations. It makes girls want to talk to me. You know- and so I just kind of honed in on that- and part of that was that I sounded weird or you know often the harshest parts were like when I worked at a bank call center and they
for half the job. They were just think I was like a southern lady and I will just go at a sort of amateur oil year without them.
Then there will really tom, because one of the things that could come up in his funeral was how how naturally an talented he was ass. Stand up here.
Was not particularly good at it, especially when he started. When I was working with him. We talk a lot cause he'd. Just do all these jokes that didn't really worried about his life, worrying about anything. They were just jokes and they just never work and he'd bomb, and I really learned
I mean it. I wasn't necessarily kellan. Ever from an early time I was able to him see I was able to go and do these things and how they all I'm ok
at this, and I will learn to get better by really was like. I have a lotta respect for someone who fuckin is eating eating shit. He's a good attitude is asking leg,
What am I doing wrong and then just grinding it out and gets better and gets better, and I mean I remember cause I've been working on this show idea and and I'm using wheel as a kind of a character idea, and then it he's will, as I'm sure you know, is very difficult to describe as a human being, I never met sure yeah. So so I'm trying to describe this character.
we just coming across as like. Why would we want those races working like? No? No he's got a heart of gold Grady that I like find these and probably like some of the latest videos that he did of his stand up and I just show them to them, and I was like watching the sets and it's all these things, that about his real life and about how his,
his nieces and indeed, is told this story about how he was day in this regard.
in his girls you hit me with those words a girl. No man wants to hear
actually they like, knowing that we need to talk, but I have a penis and I was like I always thought it was just some street jokey did then, as at his funeral, and then the girlfriends there
all this will real real whenever you're such a weird or do they even knew. When I lived with his
story about how he lost his virginity. I was their correct know. Why was there now where's your story? I gotta tell ya
in oregon,
at the time that they would do these shows at what was essentially just a swingers club trying to pick up Michael ryder
sorry, I'm sorry about that. I'm sorry about the microphone. Did you notice because receipts
that one around so much this one? I haven't touched it once and then we had a determined way and today the swinging club we're going to carmody
again I was married, so I was like I'm going to just do comedy and sit down and not look at anybody at all, but I'm gonna. Look, I'm gonna look around a lot, but I'm not gonna talk to anybody about what will he didn't have that issue and he was a virgin and
I just hope, the see at this time he was twenty, seven, twenty, eight or wow, and so this girl she was, she seemed very lovely, nice lady. She just took them to the back and and then,
and took his virginity. That's how he that's only allows rigidity. Eta swing is club after due in ten minutes a shitty
comedy. Well, I waited in the in the little kitchen, you're missing a very important detail. It was too,
old, fat. Lady, oh okay, yeah. He openly told that story to everyone, and, oh my god, cause he will didn't exactly take care of himself. So he added these struggle with the lake
as you know, in whatever way, yedo away dude yeah overweight day really shower as much as he should of.
life among everyone everywhere in the pot gases, Ike
and it's over, that I was out the everyone picturing there's like cool.
No, I
to learn from him too. He grinded it out and if he couldn't get shows where he wanted to he created his own shows. I remember one of my favorite things was he he went to the fox theatre in a very tiny town
organ. He knew he could draw a little bit, so it is created his own comedy show, and he brought some friends
and yet
and I dunno yeah, yeah and- and I know what do I know- men are an old pro yeah she's, pretty big into portland.
I dont mean order where they have worked over, follow the pilot, helium mamie, yeah, dynamically and yeah. I just I just I cared for him. So much now, I'm going to talk about yeah man. I know how I loved you get to talk to him about em in its very rare and listened in Oregon ryan rail now, as is awesome,
What a great time that's fuckin cool! That's really cool all my friends that are dead. I can only talk to my idiot friends about yeah. It's a bug. It always transpires into. We should get coke yeah
let's go
now
the only stories will be about really trying to fit in and smoking pot when he didn't smoke pot and try to eat at the dab. I don't know if you've ever
canada will never take any job, but I probably will never take a dab well yeah. He was like he's a guy who never smoked pot and he took two dads.
It's because we were at a friend gone to John's house and you're, like John's house, look cool in front of guns, John, you know, and he just sunk into god, John's couch and refused to move for three hours. We watched a movie
and then we were like they were getting ready to go to bed and we were like well, we gotta get outta here and he's just laying on the couch, oh yeah, he we. Finally, we pull him up, he's just sweating drenching with swear. We pull him up. He takes a few steps down the hallway.
Knocking over all their family photos. And then you know how, like you, you think I saw it in your house to keep your like all your shoes,
no cause? You? Don't people won't? Oh? No! I just I just bought. I just was at the nike outlet I'll have the girls. I like that. I I displayed them for the girls to see when they got home. My life love of family issues together, but they had all their
how could they discover
in the hallway tick issues often come in the hallway and we'll just vomited.
every pair of their she large scale. They were vomit and they wind.
Their bathroom into locked himself in the bathroom for another hour
I've been there all marijuana. I've been there. I've devils units of funny marijuana the only drug, I'm afraid of that's crazy
is a boy's entry. Only later I shall do my really occasionally mushrooms, that's a little drink allergic. We mean your logic. I will
project, but nobody like our way. What happens my throw closes up
echo vomit again breathe, you're, lucky people say there, but
forget about casual sags. It makes it very difficult to be very charming, which I am so works out: yeah yeah.
I will have a better more I'm doing my neck special about at in drink for a month ago, a month of twelve thirty, two days to be exact,
That was the first time I had like sober sacks
I may have had it. I guess, but I never really paid attention, but I was the first time that I was like. Oh I'm doing this stone sober, it was really aggressive. Yeah. No, I mean that's, usually all of mine so and makes it
difficult. We are right now. I know I make him a mistake. I know by them
I you know, I thought this out. I weighed all the pros and cons. I have a very sober mind and I still made a mistake, but it was great for when I first started comedy for sure cause. I didn't have anything to be like
This? Is my crutch or you know you just see I mean also. I was like three hundred and sixty pounds at that point. I can't imagine if you threw drinking on top I'd probably be dead. Was that your biggest three sixty? And what do you do to thirty to thirty guy? He looks better than to thirty. I work out my lot
yeah working? Thank you, I'm actually a little heavy. My latest was to twenty, but I got heavy over the holiday. This was two twenty I just got. I just got up to two twenty eight over the holidays, I've been really conscious of my weight. Lately, I'm running like crazy. How did you go?
How did you go about losing the way I just
I was there I got to my heavy is I was infilling grade and, and people are waking me
upon planes telling me that I had sleep apnea and I was like that's not cool people are strangers, are concerned about me and my mom was just
they're gonna like buying you, like five pictures, doesn't make me feel good, less concerned about you and I got
job on data bull and I try to lose
a little bit of weight on my own and then I lost thirty pounds, and then I put it back on because I had always been heavy, but I'd been able to maintain it by the fact that I was poor. So I couldn't eat that much and then, when you got money, I was like
Jeez tags all day, poles maids as I did when I got the three sixty and then in the cool, isn't bill
lawrence a guy who you know ran on datable was just like hey. I I use this trainer. If you want to use them I'll give them, let you use them for free for, like I think it was for ended up being about a year and then so I did that and then I just started continued once I got my other jobs and stuff. I just started painting myself and- and so I just had that trainer for like two years now and we've just been doing like that, and I just stopped
eating like share them in a still struggle dependent on my mood or from like stressed out, I mean I accidently the whole box of cereal, but I
london, miller, Emily and something I would never eat boxes area.
So no, no! My tells cry I didn't eat on the flight here and I just woke up. I flew in this morning from portland at six in the morning and I woke up and I ate a kitkat bar and it fucking tasted, so good yeah see that sounds crazy to me. I love chocolate. I think everybody's got their own vices like I couldn't have this out like these things,
It's real yeah and oh I I I've only eaten them. When I get high, not like I've. If I eat an edible, sometimes my my appetite will be voracious like and I will murder food, but for the most part I can say
from sweets for the most part when I'm working on a lotta yet and I'm not drinking us,
Peter all over me. I can't stop him. Ok, so that's it
The thing that you're like? Oh I'm, saving. My calories for drinking throw yeah yeah yeah yeah. I always save my calories for drinking. I've always been like that
but lately I've changed or we were talking about weed a little bit and I've been snowboarding on the weekends. So I've been
my snowboard with me wherever I go, and it's really kind of like the save my life a little bit because Adele,
drink per se as much as I would. I have a couple
and see how you re an active europe. Bulgaria and through I wanna, be active the next morning, so I smoke a little, but are we
before I started drinking and then I don't want to drink, it's almost like taking a xanax, and when did you start smoking weed when I was sixteen really yeah,
streets is not taken breaks I a year break when my son was born,
the latter day of my life to go there and then I think of them,
just over a month break in october. When you also word none,
and can others right? You did. You didn't know we
that one year completely sober otto
I liked it
I liked it, and I also as leg
I don't want to live like this like this? Is your name? Is so many hours of so many things to do, but it did did
shine a light on being like? Oh, maybe it only did get high in the airport bathroom like that
It's not just the airport bathroom yeah, you spoke very fly yeah
but and that would always just be like yeah, it's not fair people getting off of drinks. Why can I get high and I'm just like? Oh I'll just get home when I get there yeah I wish I could get high before I flew. I wonder if that would call me down. I think it would smoke this weed this weekend. I'm still like I
well, like I remember saying, Romanos he was like nigga nigga whoa. What kind of weed is it and he was like it's weed to smoke it you're gonna be fine, and I was like I'm still
The level were like us
of a weed. I will fill the difference. Yeah like I will this eighteen nanda doubtfully biodiversity, if I this indigo heavy hybrid this weekend caused belgian, faster
be my fair whatever's vote, my entire life- it literally,
like a annex- and I was like I was just chill as fuck-
well and it was like made me what it was like. You know the kind of weed where you go. I want to dive deep into netflix yeah like you like. I don't want to. I want to get in my bed
only a pillows all around me and I want to dive deepen enough, which is why should japanese duty trees of gear up what was unbearable,
really cool, is
further, I get away from it the more I able to appreciate the way
on other jobs, rather like less interested in me. Improvise anger, less interested in me being me
because a lot of times when that show that they're literally in the scripter would just say Chris says joke or ron comes up with joke and having that type of freedom which, at the time I was like mad? I was like why don't you write that joke you know, but having that type of freedom and the fun, and that was really awesome and just being on network
tv was over their eyes of young chris brent yeah, rick, glassman, yeah, yeah yeah. The comic of the group here. Did you guys just one
Do you guys ever do a tour together we did a tour yeah. They tried to promote it with a tour for the first two years, and that was fun but not profitable for me, because Chris took all them
funny so really yeah. So I was getting mad by the second year. I was like no, I can actually make money, so I wanted to plus they would they would take the fun out of touring.
Became more like a job more like
being on the show, because you had to go and promote to show in the daytime they were
They have late publishers.
Will there and people from embassy there who were network necessarily cool with gettin hype?
when a show and really in I'll, given irises like strategy I which either
fine. I never magna blowing in his face area, namely that by jazz data and why
peel and then I will I, whenever I take pictures with people that I always like hug them or hang out with them and talk with them for a bit and they would always be like move along move along moving along. So that's fucking, crazy, I was like
inside. At one point I was like look. I had this job before. I knew you guys. This is how I do it. So this is how I'm going to continue
to do a just eyeball for eighty year olds. I'd never understand. I have a high,
hard time wrapping my head around dating
or women like yeah. I saw that. What would the dankert thing David ain't? Your yeah, I mean
seems difficult. I dunno why you would talk about just let him play on their ipad. You parents won't let him play other people, I'm like yo, hey it's cyber sunday to play on your fucking ipad
I sit on Dana? I'm sir would now thinks more road. When I just I just go alike,
christened younger girls to
please answer. They say it. Clubs that he's like he likes you like. I don't know I nothing.
There's nothing wrong with it as their aid there of age or adults. Yeah there's nothing illegal. I think part of that. I wonder if it if, if societies
leaning into this puritanical, like with this me too.
thing is not to go like no. No, no! I wonder
would that article about dame was trade or trying to lean into his like yo
no, I think, is where you know they mean the bag. You can go back to the sixties and stuff. I think people were still like. Oh, it was as jerry Lee lewis about like that's, not the coolest carolina. She was fucking. Thirteen yeah yeah that'd be excuses, cause it yeah.
I I was really fucked up.
Yeah yeah. I get that too
Better than that sure I mean I'm certain both dillion can day will be like do
one I with a nineteen year old, draw me you'd, never go back to forty seven,
but I'm sure, like I just
Look at it like I!
there's so many times. I make a reference year that that young kids don't get yeah,
The gotta reference about long doug dong. In what one of my shows my I had to change it because allowed you did
get it. They didn't know that all know what that is. They thought I was being
race, yeah yeah, they thought I was making an asian name yeah and I was like no that's a character from sixteen candles and they're like dunno it by the way watch. Sixteen candles is racist.
so they were right. You do feel like do you ever feel like
I don't know your politics, I don't really care to know anyone's politics these days all on the same page, but do you ever feel, like the the all
seeing the liberals came at you and immediately assumed one thing because of you?
personality or persona you're you're you're. Like I carry yourself,
Well, I mean that's been my whole life is kind of fun. Learning them will go against those personas and and kind of using that for my advantage, especially being a
I was a larger
I being a large black man in Oregon? I remember you overweight. Now, I'm, like I remember a hard time picturing it. I can see it yeah as I learn how people saw me and then a lot of my comedy and again it was like going against that
and then, as my weight changed, I was like. Oh, I just have to keep being me and learn and tell jokes, but as far
as leg. Just people
our liberal and over me. I just never really.
the people who I really fuck away. We don't really ever talk about that type of stuff who's, your who's, your who's. Your group, I literally just hang out with people I've known from like back
in oregon, lay real yeah. My feature. Name's names gave dinner and I have known him since I danced comedy like he had been doing
we as a former israeli funny dude, has been in future.
so here and there, but in a calm down fishermen in any other people, I usually emma arnauld, was really really funny. Lady, maybe that's window. You know him
Where does that? Did you say your name? Earlier nice ethan?
what are Amanda arnold,
I know one of the arnold yeah they yeah they got unless they gotta they gotta start a sister group or get one of them's gotta change their name yeah. How about mostly just like?
A lot of my friends are my old time. Friends are people who helped me out like when I first started commonly called moshe.
Sure crimes were I'm anything.
That's really bad kemal in, but we want to help males who fuckin so happy for here had so great
big sec. I've seen it yet aroused ground amazing.
crazy, he's an interesting guy? I had him on the pike s awhile ago with first time. I think.
There's a part of my brain is a little bit of a media, had not a little bit model a lot of it. Ok, not nothing about
It says that yeah I have a man cave or late in the middle yeah. I think it's so funny, because I I I I had this joke one time where I said
I used to forsake escort
I can't organizational campus in the nineties.
For to stay where you walk rather cross campus. So they would get sexually assaulted, yeah and everyone everyone the same. So they go you major there
actually resulted older than I was like wait. Are you telling me I succeed? I look like someone who's, actually assaults, people and emeralds. Like yes, dude. I think I kind, I think the people that do that. Look like me, they're, like big
You do look a little bit like you, whether they re also norma, that's wrong. Yet, if I said I am harder.
I guess I don't know. I think it looks like anybody these days as true everybody. Can you never know Dustin Hoffman they're coming up for him and then
army pippin manner,
of your main jeremy pit. Taboo is a very good. Do you I'll
in law like he's
a brow hero, like all the browser like forget, low jury within a madame doing,
show with russia peter see alike, as I
Oh god, but I like yours, but everything ever is
in very bad things when you fuck that grown you killer and is
like a year,
he's at a light in there. That was so real he's like oh, you thought I was going to be some pod car that he's fucking her and she's like I was like wow man that months ago, from a real but yeah, that's interesting. So what?
so those are monitoring the rustling gases water.
Maybe you're starting wrestling like whew? Where did you fall in love with wrestling
I feel wrestling when I was a private five.
I fell in love with comedy and wrestling around the same time growing up in Chicago. There was a lot of I love lucy, that's how I fell in love with comedy was true, which is true, lucy and
my group, in a house of Jesus
When my mom and my dad divorce it wishes my mom,
am I ah and her daughter and then my sister, so is just for girls and in me,
and so I didn't really have much testosterone. We played a lot of pretty
pretty princess, I massage a of fee when they came home from work. Those were the gains I play yeah and
So when did you start gaining weight? I mean it seems, like my probably as long as I can remember, but my eight nine ten probably remember going back and forth still intimate donuts of the out of the kitchen thing.
I like how I would not get caught. If I ate the whole box of doughnuts, you know gonna get caught if you eat the whole box, yeah yeah, but you know no issues with overeating.
But my uncle, he would take me he like rats. Let you take me to rosemont horizon in Chicago and we would go see like hope, hogan and earthquake
It can this as dual watching w w e yeah debbie at the time.
You have some of the age.
It was still localised
like my, but we would see dusty
Yeah caravan VON Erich that one
whom Daniels like all these member. I remember
going to see a library say shown being blown away at the showmanship, the noises the overwhelming this of it? It was at the the tap artillery centres.
Then? It was right by the right by tampa catholic or not tip the catholic temp wrap, and it was, I remember, being blown the fuck up
way and then that you could meet them afterwards. Yeah yeah severity,
enlarges it was fun to have a place where you could yell at people, and you had these clough colorful career governor have just fallen in love with like,
the ultimate warrior before I knew he was raises, and we hate me
he was dead now, so I win.
All races, I beg you ever he was allow raises than the others, because he came out as leg conservative, pundit and started railing.
against women and gays and black people really yeah and black people yeah. Well, just re that I I go. I understand his rant about gays and women women, but what blackbeard yeah fuck? He was just a general, a racist and then he died and now they don't they just are like he was great.
Yea, it's fun
They have a whole award about him. Instead of about being like old warrior out here, you don't push you to protest about wrestling right now. I try to wear just damage time very busy,
yeah, but I mean x, Poc booze, a great wrestler have no next part for awhile yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah we've talked about it. We might still do it, but we did a show. We were doing live, shows at the senna family,
where we would just get high and watch ratlin it make fun of it. Now. We just curious
he's like our long videos of clips, that I light of lake
oh man and does he rose promos and no magic?
as one of my very things that you are doing for awhile yeah was you're doing when you're doing your tour you're doing wrestling promos,
To promote the two year- and I was
I was doing promos, but I wasn't doing wrestling promos, but the second you did proposals like mother, fucker katy. That's it that's. What I should have been doing. It is those were the best yeah dusty roads. As my favorite promos ever I've watched his does his promos
since then and been like fuck genius. I was
talk hogan anna in orlando, and I said
a holga. My buddy and I are like a weight loss thing and, and I would love you could do like a shout out, video just making fun of him he's like. What's his name brother, I was like Tom Segura he's like. Let's go, I pulled my camera up, he pulled off,
the best one minute to a t rant on cigarettes that I've either
You can see me in the shop just going like like getting
like so excited those guys have jobs that I don't think
a lot of chronic job yeah now near mason,
it's cool. Now, let me I'm friends with a lotta recipes and friends: will I independent wrestlers and it's cool to light
have that community leg. I feel, like my friends,
and like a lot of like it's like kind of like old vaudeville, where, like I don't just hang out with comedians, and I do hang up communes like angled comedians musicians, wrestlers and it's all kind of the same job like talking with them, what them, how learning, how they want to pop a crowd and and and
They want their master come off and also how
do their merge and things like that. I have learned a lot. I learn more about business.
in about being in entertainer from wrestling in rap music than I have from most committed
is because a lot of times when it was
in the comedians, it was like people who wanted to be really cool, who were like nah, don't do merged as lame like you're lame. If you do merge and then I'm talking to my wrestling friends and they're like how do you fucking survive, if you don't do merch, you have to have merged. Not only is it good for you for your bottom line, then
people were wearing your name out there. They have your name on their chest, you know, and I was once I learned to think about that and and to make the shirts cool and things that I'd actually want to wear. I was like, oh, I get a hide from me.
a fund, new item and then sell it. Just as I do from writing a cool joke, you know it is, is the same
type of I'm in here
and to promote yourself in
learning how you have to go outside of things, to make a name for yourself, regularly learning from wrestling
like they will only if you lead,
w w ii or something decides your pecking order? You're only going to be this high, but if you're willing to go outside of that and work your own route and you become famous in another way, then you get more money. When you go back to the w w e and it's like the same woods would stand up a lot.
That is why I would want to do like
I'm sure I love doing game, show the lagoon cook. Ngos have been only child
The ban on me
game? I do all these things and then I thought, as some people
who were more like stand up curious in their liking. Lets you mean that's fucking stupid, but, unlike
Yeah, but you don't see how that makes when I go to stand up and make more,
because my shows makes my rate go up and you know it
still doing my stand up, I'm not changing, I'm just and I'm just having fun.
It's silly, it's silly to me that I'm on a cupcake wars making a bunch of cupcakes. You know why the fuck am I here. This is awesome, you know and then once I learn
Think about that. I really feel like it is this I mean shit. You know like I bought a house.
serve and, like I m, really has forgotten
full time job. I worked one season a powerless after on data boldwood, and I was able to afford a house and keep my rates at himself without
having any papers show any type of calves. Any type of is has been mean willing.
The green and do everything in order to begin
of last year I had an epiphany about seeking our stuff, I loved and doing stuff. I love
meaning like my further. The best example is probably.
Once was a show that I loved
Will you wings tempt progressively hotter wings, and I just
I watched it. I loved it,
and I I think I enjoyed it for a long time and I was sharing it I'd retweet it and I'd post it whenever he posted one. I just liked it and then I did it
I did it probably the end of the year,
probably the end of last year.
And then I and it came out. Then I enjoyed it now and am going to do more of that, and so like Jesus, a miro or a show that I really loved. So I
shelter was like y'all would like to do show and they were like yeah. I mean I think at the beginning it was like now it would be really hard to unity is marilyn, but the beginning they're like
Yeah we're five days did village guests, please, and I just
did that my whole time. I did. I stop
doing conventional television because depressed me,
had been in it so long. It just depressed me bothered me
so I did at a guy's gross games and with
this guy
whereas it albeit anthony Roby and Jim, has caused
like how many guys grocer games. How was it and ass? I was just being ourselves like I hated it
so's cooled hang out, tammy end in lahti.
I realize I don't want to do tv anymore and he was like. I was the producer of that and I was like oh sorry, yeah, but I just stopped. I stopped.
Initial televisions. Kind of turn me off it had been. I don't like I dont like
I just want to do, and I want to do in only one here. Why don't you like about us? I don't I've been told what to do yeah. I read I the real problems that, like a genuine genuine problem with it, I dont want people trying to put words my mouth and we will try to produce me I'll. I feel like I can do me perfect. Please old ever tell me what to do
I don't like being told. I don't like being told to do what it comes down to. I think
sorting eddie. If I were in portland, he was it harvey's this weekend when I was a helium and we're on
of your snowboarding, I said worsen.
Well my fears as being stuck on a ski left are stuck in a roller coaster
miss why stop doing birth. Conquers goes, I couldn't be enrolled cos,
I was afraid of being slaughtered rollercoaster and he says it's called not was khalifa khalifa.
Phobia clean up ass. I am, and I was like- and I was gonna think that leads into a corner with me. A television europe project
the storm march, but molly
doing it because I can do it because I'm gonna do
I don't mind, paying now putting my money into something and doing it cause. I
oh yeah. That's what I like. I like that I like making stuff. I really do.
the porter stuff like doing my god loves movies or or or this
castro. Rogue is progress through tommy's talk, castor. I like doing
if you were like yo, I'm doing a a wrestling show me x park and we're just going to fuck around. I love that shit and I don't mind being told what to do on that stuff, but when the
it comes to like people in this business- I don't think really have any talent and just want to have a title of working in tv, yeah and then
come in alike, so I'm gonna need
you to grab the plate, hold it up, show everyone, and then I want
big smile and my dad don't ever fuck you talk to me like,
it makes my skin crawl now get there. But with that, what would be your dream job
My dream job is key
and what I'm working on I've always wanted to do a show about me and my son, and in raising being a single dad of a son with autism and do a comedy about that and cause. I don't think I've ever really seen I've seen some shows about
we would artisans and then his eyes very dramatic, and what is what are what? What like?
I think everyone knows what autism is. But what are what like? What are the the pillars of
tourism the things that you go,
Lack of eye contact were probably a pillar of autism. I
usually in bad hygiene in, but also my cells, got pretty great hygiene. Dora is horrible. I mean everyone every time I tell stories about my daughter at the end, everyone always says your daughter is autistic
well. She is on the spectrum of congratulations. If she is certain she has to fall. I think I'm on the fucking spectrum. I think a lot of people are on the spectrum. Yeah leah means a lotta things that you just didn't get dang.
when you are younger? And you know it's: it's such a large spectrum,
but my son, like kids, in a lot of people when they say that they're like I have aspergers, I'm not socially correct and stuff. My son has played classic autism, where, like
he was younger, he would as seizures and
It is when he certain foods. We came to the park and you just try to dart off.
stimulated very easily relate to this day, like what were you learn to like control,
his environment like he, whereas like arm earmuffs like the type you
it would get when you work at an airport or if you're going to a monster truck rally. He just wears those around the house really yeah, so he does
like all you are auditory, isn't over stimulate, really mean
get over stimulated similarly, like that
with things are loud yeah
I got a reason, sir big one really.
When did you guys? Those autistic we're
We know there is some thin
but we do know what it was for awhile. He just like. We thought it was death for a little while they just wouldn t. Just when listen to you like you get ya.
his name any behind ye, be right behind him and desires or bring Leon, and here I ll hurt woman. I was a baby. We thought she was deaf yeah guy with this might be a big day for you.
But yeah, but then we would play lake,
most world elmo's road theme song in his head, which is whip around and they always not dead. He
that and then he would always like replay alot of his view,
like an replay the jungle book, but like a lot of kids linked they'd watch movies and they watch it again listens to my sandwiches rewatched the same scenes late,
over and over again, and so there is a lot of blood
and then just again him. His speech.
Had started normal and then regressed
and now my mom brought it up. And after I was like no fuck, you you're wrong, then we were like we should get them tested and then we found out he was and how do they test for autism
a lot of ways. There is leg. Regular too
Instead they do like cognitive tests and they can find out base of his verbal skills and things like that. But then there's also like a blood test that tests like mercury levels and things like that hope for real now do you,
yeah like once you were like we had to get on the pier to get on disability which get like
hammond willie or by the best free, if we would didn't disability while he was here-
the poor. I don't even think I could have became a comedian because that's how we paid the rent for awhile was just, but once you've you try to apply for it. You have to get the blood tests, make sure really yeah, so we could.
getting a blood tests and find out of artistic and probably not an all
but you can, you will tell you if you're on the spectrum probably mean, but it probably will be like you're somewhere on the spectrum, yeah really nice. I started I used to think this is probably disrespectful
but I think autism was simply natural,
selection, meaning we were getting quicker and faster for the future of what it held that a lot of people
the way societies, work, streamlining, interact,
it is not necessary yeah and I used to think that it was like
Autism was us losing our tail yeah. Now, there's a lot of people that that don't that to that theory, really
tat were there is this term termed indigo children are crystal children, which means like
These are might the kids
who are guys into what is our guides into what the future is gonna be like
and this is the type of thing and in the latter always amid ways I mean. I believe that is a lot of things I learned from my son, about
shredding traditions and lay he just was
I remember christmas. We haven't like one of our first christmases in him. He knew that there is some
ip somewhere and he just and I were just like. Oh you, gotta wait for christmas. Santa clauses comment on the twenty fifth he's going to be here, and he just goes that's dumb
and how is like. Yet it is dumb, you're right, yeah, oh yeah, right as dumb and things like that wages.
kind of like
I get new lens on things because of him where I could. I could agree with you, but then,
languages, like my wish,
he just had easier time in school and stuff. So that's the tough part is apparent, is
wanting to live their life for them and get them through the hard parts, but the hard part,
what divine you yeah
Such a great attitude he's late. I've never seen him really get down on themselves for filet gazing
it ain't like he will tell you himself that he's a smart kid he's a kind kid he's, a handsome kid cause. That's
but he's been told his whole life in this cause. That's what he is.
and it's just cool to have
back perspective. That again, I mean similar to what willy or was like. Oh it's cool, to see someone who has
these challenges and does not lead
it affects them at all. Doesn't let him get them down you everything? Is
It really makes me where they work harder and in a better attitude because shake appeal ours was at the stream. We did
it causes strain on the marriage that ended the marriage, or was that just as bad from the get go? It was not the marriage marriages, a high school, like you know, in high school, my first girlfriend it's bad wow, yeah she's, not a good decision. When you look at it logically, you should water block she's way, really your sons
one doesn't look like he's: half black half white. He does, he think, he's all black. Well, you look like. I guess now that you say that may be, but I like it's so funny when you start to talk about your mom and your dad. I was like I dunno why
thought this browser goes down down. I pictured your dad
your dad as I like, a real man. You know like, like, though, the great
oh replied, one of those gray hands, and today we have just like the hand, tells a story it is only grab is that it gives you like
keys onwards.
I think I romanticize being black in my head.
I don't know why I'm doing
They re now about this. I've been thinking about you all weekend. So doing this bit of fathers,
I one time I dunno my. I don't think I'm thomas special about this, this black eyed it
his premise was that black is unaffected by the same afflictions like it
like the binding, is right. We will make em up residence, autism, dyslexia, eighty
are made up why people, diseases and
there was a true story. I was at a black club and
doing this. It was murdering hae. No,
He again, no eighty de mama smell
you wanna beggary, as has already been medicine, bitch an angel,
blogging, get no dyslexia anal just
dyslexia members about you,
about you enjoyed, there's your design, medicine bitch, and I got up on stage after room and ozone.
I hate her eyes were made a little footnote, his eyelids dyslexic, my daughter,
I just wanna, make a footnote your act. Your black is due
We got a D d and dyslexia, but you guys drop out of school. So early. We don't have time to catch it. That's all fine and it
murdered itself.
I gotta tell them a special, but I can't I don't worry. I can cause the real guys bit
become dumb. Small volumes lay such a in the time.
yeah yeah. I had a lot of contacts with elegant mutate badge. Oh god I can't you be, then
well what the fund of the transit. The point with the point being is that I was in a back, and I was like almost offended
yeah. He was talking like this and I would like- and I was like- we can't be- that different- that there are people in this room through the fund are funny
They must be laughing at his delivery. Not what he is saying is people managers.
Yeah. I know their world a hundred reserve shit we're living in a time right now were as well as well as lake goober, jokes and kale. Autism is the buzzword: these open, my eggs, you know they didn't use and instead a retarded because they feel that they can t get away with it. You know
fins me all the time unless you have something new you're adding to it, and I'm not really that offended all the time, but also I know I go like this is my personal life, just as your your daughters, your personal life, and perhaps, if you
didn't have that in your life you might have, you might have heard it at all yeah. You would have been laughed so funny. I might not have heard it all. I didn't think about that until you just said that a
because he said dyslexia, I reared outlaws eyebrow your fucking idiot, you like it.
because I heard him say autism and those ike and is so funny.
This this habit awhile ago is destined for. I knew you and I thought to back his autism.
I thought that I was like. Is he being real but he's under autism, and then he will.
Ghana, dyslexia, bitch and, as I wait hold on, but his deadly dyslexia.
Yeah was saying: like black people, don't go to therapy you're like well, maybe that might be, but at the same joseph there ain't, no gay black people like yeah that yeah there are. You know what are you talking about? It's just like in there are
cultural sweepings. Yes, that I did. I do agree with like, for instance, I had said
chapelle said on his special privately to friends.
So the inward bunch up up up up
I
I know
Black women are riding out black men every harking back to slavery. Time yeah I'd said that I would like, as you gotta be tell him. You gotta, be kidding me to think
the nfl network or e S, p, n or or professional football where they were ray. Rice knocked the fuck out of his
If that sexual harassment is it right there or that black will ignore black.
more speeding up while black men and I said that
I also the next thing out loud before anyone,
says it:
the next sexual harassment, one's gonna, be it's gonna, be a black. They have fought in a white chick.
Black man will be a little more vocal and low more like low, more rafter insects.
He won't
to his behaviour during
the sex, and then she will say it's rape and he'll be like hold the fucker phones. That's how I fuck you had
up up up up up up up up leg. I think that the next one like because they're so
at very least, that's how I loved the lady, no one
I won't say that no one will come and go. That's how I blog know. I like I like to lay you know. I'll I'll change must be demands. What was going on either a lotta people to do that.
my my my change, my speed, my whole life,
different men. Now there are men who have been trying to. Please went the woman, I've I've always I've. Always
very concerned
I my entire life if it was a kind of
So I go oh yeah that yeah no, no, I have to be one hundred percent in the vi. There be anything where I'm like pushy guy, I'm just not into the next thing. Yeah, no like I don't push into I've, never been some of the smack an ass. I've never been someone to like these were
put his fingers in their mouth. I never did that like I, just as some might think I dont like I dont like
some missing, my woman I like to
to write it out with her yeah,
No, that's! Ok! I just felt like that is a mark. I fuckin loud comedians get a bad vibes, bad rep and there lay down
me and my way, while one you like, we are constantly seeking approval late.
and includes in the bedroom. You know you're tryin, like I was there,
this lady there
when she climax she will spontaneously
birth and the laughter and I'll just like you, don't know what this means for me
I know you like. Let me know when it's happening. I want to work out some new material yeah. This you just took two of my favorite sounds and you wrap them together and now I gotta make this happen all the time we had great times, but I don't get that I just don't get
But there are guys I darrow guys that I mean there are people
It's all you guys. There are women there are,
that is well yeah. You know
I think
is interesting? Oh, I watch this love. Me too has taken this press couple weeks.
When I go and someone said, there's someone really big coming out of my blue or that's gonna, be.
Do you get caught up in that way?
they care about it. Now,
now, really am happy when people for people who fill it there. If
were victimize and they feel they need to get that off their chairs and the and and and they then
that's a new bravery for them, as they did this happen for me, call em, who, with that and to me
is now like a new thing worth. It's cause, it's always like does happen to me late. Unlike yet, is it just
the thing that happened, that will bring it out to the light. So that's not to me.
Another positive. You know like cool you, sam people can be fuckin assholes cos
Well, it's like, I don't have a problem with that. I know a lot of people do they like where they're like. Well, it makes it definitely how you can't even hit on. Ladies and I was like what do you mean, like you know, yeah, ladies always, let you know when it's gonna be a little more respectful, then I think that I think the aziz
it was by the biggest
doorbell to everyone. Every gags, I think every guy was like. Okay, I've been a little bit of that yeah, but yeah, but I feel like that was the one where people are most like. I don't know what this is. I don't know if this should be a thing and it's hard it's hard. You know I I always say I. I immediately defend disease because
guy. I only right only relate to bring it up because I'm biased, like I love, is easy. I mean
the first timing,
and the only times I've ever performed in arenas was with him. So dick nice guy he's nice to you, yeah yeah tribute me.
data like he is an asshole. I d
I'm still it'll that'll be easily be grooves above it is like I'd. I automatically, I think, he's fine.
He is well, but when I didn't mean him, he was a real prick meets a girl. Both
well literally lot of guys that don't like that guy yeah, but I can see that in the regards that you guys would like it breaks down
into like nerds vs jocks, so yeah, but it shouldn't be like when you're cool to someone you should be cool to somebody yeah I go to him and he was a dick and we were like we're like. I was
I just was caught off guard and I was like, oh so you're really simple.
I by the by the outcome at four
regular comic thing you you just see past it and just go
will also in the back of a kind of close bullshit just comics,
I said, yeah so, but I didn't take any joy watching thus think about it.
Adam because, like as I know I mean
at a man there's a lot of it as very complicated, not want to pile on him, because I know that I can't imagine being the situation is in. You know where, where it too,
complicated for him right now, but a body of course. He likes you
Why? Wouldn't it who's not going to fucking, like you know, some people down who name a comic as a dick to you and I'll fucking? If he's mine
stop talking again that their meaning now like before, I could say like when I first started. First went to like montreal and stuff like the people.
Leg Jim, nor in late those people they really ere. They were nice to me. They are now while also
I think I just heard my really heard my laugh from far away a little over the records imminent like be either. That's when my group, specifically, what happened was like I don't lose their whole crews, whoever you think that norway avi lost sight of all my early august, evaluating in a hurry and with me laugh and then I just see them to start mocking my. Let me laughing and I was late and
just like just I thought this was calm was I thought this was a place where I got away from people like this. I thought this was not football and
jack is in so for a while. I just don't like them by like jump a nice to me since then. Is it he's gems of very sweet guy, but I definitely.
Identify doubt what I only talking about when I was a young comic and I think, that's part of the new york seen as this bullying of like of like, if your young
on his you're young started become successful. Then you're you're, we can say the most brutal things you
if you ever meet patrice. No, unfortunately, he was a big influence on why I lost some weight, though oh for real yeah cause is have a stroke, yeah yeah me too. I part of like a treasure. I say if you thought it's better, that you never met patrice because of you
Mcnerney up guys were robbed. Patrice was a fucking taxpayer bully.
And in the most.
insightful hurtful way.
He was so far, but by where love patrice love em. I love that guy, but yeah that
I hate that that is what happens with all
buddy and regular comedy, and I don't think you're in all call it personally by do see that you could lean that way, yeah, but now mean that pride myself on amain fucking nerd. Yes, a hundred per cent on earth, it was a nerd at all on autonomy. We meal of pro wrestling video games, jabba warmer, I know,
lucky
we all like caressing, we all like progressively
but you may. I might have liked a little more you're taking rank ass if we go legitimately up to like two years ago. I rest
failure to come around in all arrests and friends in all my wrestling comedy friends with post about it on twitter and you go on, and I see all my comedy friends making the same.
shady joke about wrestling
all of em kourou, ale flogging all over again,
two years later at all, we lag whereas live I'm doing a movie with Josiana fuck. You Camille, I loved her
You'd go mail. I love you. I love you for years you hate a wrestling diana moving again
How do we do to you do lean? You do lean towards. I guess the people your most like. I think I am most likely jocks of comedy,
like rogan, ARI, Joey jody.
As tommy
Norton Bobby rich.
I do lean towards them yet
and I and I I I had.
Yeah I mean I had a rough run with the old scene when I was younger cause. They just looked at me and they were like yeah he's not going to be belonging here and I was like well I'm just a comic. I just want to tell jokes yeah. I think I was more like them artistically. Then I was like my friends
much more artistically all when I do stand up it is.
much more all than it is,
I think you get a ladder, respect in our community and then you get respect amounting one thing. That is the way we produce
we get along that. We both further like it
here. The places where we do get respect. You know. I don't expect that the late the guests,
regular car. Many people will. I maybe that's what I told you. I'm not scared. You know your last viral loved loves is there
I love being able to go and do my jokes at meltdown or largo are the comedy store and I don't like- and sometimes they might not work as well at the comedy store, but I'm gonna do my same jokes and
it might not work well, the companies were blown away. How I can do well on the road and or the o aren't on my case, this work
whose work I apologize me. I know me, I'm fuckin had so many nights run like this over
is killing everywhere, except
fuckin room. I turn in another comics volume
and I got last time I bomb there. I was just like really really you guys were diana de lille. He just talked to you about a flight to australia for ten minutes. He gave you nothing oh by the way, and I and I hope I haven't come out shitting on delete dogs. I love Julia. I love him. He like when you
space in my head. Based on your social media present, I get it makes me. Have you the only guy who this diagram stories
legitimately the only person whose instagram stories make me laugh like. I owe everything that it is. I I'm like. Okay, whatever like his shit, oh nice, I'm glad that you share that with us. Yeah yeah yeah, so that's all you're eating pizza or another sold out show room cool
it's awesome. I'm really good. I'm really happy for you who you sharing this with by the way I'm guilty of this too. I've done it where you like, sold out, shows this weekend who the fuck you like anyway, delete
oh yeah, I five does hate.
faces at my head voluntarily aware he'd, just as me
when his eyebrows and smile and before he, dogs and unions like and watch
him does drawing room, and then you up here like working on some new and it just
flat lines you like guys
I toiled over this over a cup of coffee this afternoon, like I've, reworked this
joke nine times and you watch him just effortlessly murdered, yeah he's great
yeah. No, I learned a lot from her for a mom.
a lot of my comedy. It's so funny too, because his acting is so muted yeah yeah he's such a.
Rate act. No really is a faint, but a lot of work and its craft and I'll
from him would allow MIKE stand up up until working with him. With me, I feel like I was
pull off a bank eyes. I was like I was just.
I hope we pull this shit off. You know, even if every set had told me before that I was good. I was like I dunno. This is going to be the one where they figure out, I'm a fraud, and I learn from him or he's just like. Oh fuck, like com,
Men's and man excited about your shit.
is contagious leg and- and I was you just- have the
learn to judge, even if they aren't loving it. You gotta love your shit and I didn't. He really helped me out a lot with Annie's. Also I mean it's fucking
They really lay down Loki
nice guy layers, we gotta, get very very nice guy. He went
I don't know, I guess I'll know Chris that well I mean I I ve no place was I know you, but I
For the same reasons, just very sweet guy, his stories made mainly fuckin giggle, yeah, nah, so fucking funny and its funding.
clothing frustrates the shit out of me. I never know where to buy clothes like that future ha ha, ha, ha ha. Feeling ass, it is like tat. Night was very do know. They all pants are a thing at thy apparent at our shores where you got while I will you knew I was passed. I was like genes are given
at the store one day- I've said there's a number of times. Have I say it again? I apologize. I came out of the store one time shirt off my dad jean.
To sixty online to sixty at the time, and I look out
increases worrying back to the future glow,
like. I don't even know what he's wearing and I had been.
looking at cars and his car was probably a quarter of a million dollars and
a girl. There was hotter than
any girl I've ever been with, came up to talk to him and he blew or offer a text, and I went
as is life really is a human being. I am as similar realisation with him when I walked past.
dressing room one day and he was on his phone tax, then
well one hot as euro that ever seen, who would never give me the time of day was pulling off his sneakers for him
because he couldn t behalf of it
I would like he's a prince,
who is he's the prince or haters hair?
I fucking hate that has the same hair. So he's never going to lose it all. You just broke my fucking art. I know I like dude his brother made a movie a long time ago, and I ended up watching his.
Others, maybe they look alike and thinking it was chris and be unlike
this guy is cause brothers really tell today is by the direction, wrote this moving, and I was
barcelona way, cause I'd, work
with christian likes, the inland empire we'd like an open mike out there, one night.
but he murdered. I think I got no final stage within that it was bad
an end.
an amendment
and then watching this movie and going god this guy's fucking talented as shit? What's going to stop him and then osama whitney, and then he was on on datable, he was just working non stop. I was like mother fucker and then
plus he had a brother. I was like oh okay, thank god at least he didn't direct that movie as well, but
would you ought to be our another? Second in the future,
any writer now right now, as we have learned a similar. What you are talking about is that
I have a hard time stand in one space lay in those was cool about on databases that if they wrote a joke,
and I didn't like it. I could just be late
and I would never be like this sucks barbie, like I don't like it, can we do
This and they were always open to that who, who created, that show bill lawrence, who scrubs and yeah cougar town clone high some of the shit, oh wow, and and they were always open to that, and then I, when I got my next job, they weren't as open to that like I would pitch them jokes, they would even tell me they'd, be like that
they funnier, but we gotta. We can't we go.
I get approval from the thing and they're not around, so we don't just do it yeah, yeah yeah. Can you just do it as is for now and I'll just be like man? If you guys wanted an actor, you could have got an actor in a weird way. Then I think you're a fantastic actor to the back door of acting as as as really as a personality yeah, but you kind of came in as like a guy. I think that
just like a rose. I oh shit, it's wrong, you know, and then you came in and you kind of.
Brought run into these roles, as opposed
to annex one of things. Let an agent low time to go. Tell me you'll, never
work is an actor, but you can
work is an actor. If you play bert he's a good
as far as like you're never going to be anyone other than bert. I mean I've been in I've been in acting class since I moved out here. So I've been classify five years now and still take acting classes, yeah for sure or stopped know I gave up. I love me cause. I want to be a lead. I want to do my show. So if I got a say in class,
Oh Jesus Christ ROM, I feel, like I'm fuckin, dropping the ball. Well, I mean it depends on your goals, my goals to act, but I kind of want to
you have my girl. She words she word would compel Jonah
her name's myra, Turley she's amazing works with a lot of people shirts, when Nikki glazers were two commands were rickert bra hauler. She worked with
and she wouldn't hurt herself within a bunch of shit, she's, still inactive actor, really
You have that
So let me up a few serious because, like yeah right now, delirious job in march, ok, a mushroom
work on this. Our love, that's my whole focus yeah. I get that
and yeah I too
acting classes and I just felt like
I felt like they were. I dunno I took
an acting coach for awhile. I think I just stopped. I think
the business changed for me and like what my dreams were and I think getting cast on something.
I didn't like the auditioning process. Yeah, I do does nope. I really didn't like it like. I was like I was like yeah. I think this is killing me.
What are they doing? What will your mind said about air hated? Would you were? How did you feel go into? It gave me where words and I hate it,
I was never
confident going in and out of those I never felt like.
Will you prepared? I was always prepared, but I never felt like I
representing the material I had in a in the best
light possible. I was thought I wish
If they would. Let me just improv this. I bet I could do it better than that. What did you I didn't like what was stopping you? I was young. I was young when I booked a couple of sitcoms
and every time I broke them, it was always ike
the great when I booked it. I did great shooting it.
But the process of auditioning adjust it made me now, I am in the hardest. Part is auditioning once you have it, I mean, except for like light, the constant fear of knowing you could be recast at any time. Does she eddie
the hardest part is always the auditioning. You know, but I had to learn that
the mines has ago from being like? Oh, I am neither.
Give them what they want to light, go and firmly
need anything from them they're here on my time, I think I was also auditioning when I needed money, and so I was like- oh, I hope, a book this.
Yeah, this can change my life yeah and that was-
the way to go in anything. Now.
Of additional, probably a little more like so many parts it piracy seem like you could play football coach basketball.
heart. You prefer
the fourth dad had a bartender at the bar guy cleaning up around the ball. I think I think I think,
Allow me to be on like phuket, like the only show I really really like right now is the mc the onset like nestle. I think that's a funny fucking shit like the good place. I don't even know what that is
What is it
it is a it's hard to explain, but basically it's a show about what happens to people after they die and they think they they are dancing yeah. Yes, I want to ruin. It was pretty good, it's good. It's pretty good.
I was pretty good. I wouldn't work while on a show like that, like I, I dunno why it seems like always sunny in philadelphia that it seems, but I would I would birthday would be good if I created that show which I think I want to create. The show too yeah, but that's also like saying like hey, I wanna run. I want to create my own burger joint, but I don't want to learn how to make the fries. You know,
You got that.
What kind of my goal is lay?
I want to make my own show, so I need to act on a show. I need to learn about. I needed I mean I
on a show. I wrote another pilot that I wasn't particularly one hundred percent invested in, but I was like these are the things that are going to help me learn when I didn't want to, because I was like well basically the thing.
my son, only I need to make this does a desk
it'd, be a thing that I fail and I so I'm willing to do a couple other things. First, that I would know I might fail and so that I get the experience so that when it's time to do this, we're ready to go
It has been my my my whole emma with that. Really, how would you have someone please son,
Will you get out get a kid, but you like? Would it be? Would it be a minute
Yes, I guess you ever like with political correctness. Now,
be ok to have have of a a kid and that's not autistic player kid that was autistic,
at our. We find a kid. That's autistic to play a kid. That's autistic yeah, I'm open to that. I just wanna find the best kid that represents my son at at the age that we were going to shoot at at. So that's really cool. Ok, I hope I hope you do that
I really hope I do it too. How did you
dodge way? How did you guys were getting on a getting pod get getting up august? I did I dodge getting a pilot everyone's gonna. I guess how did you know get a by catches
I have are like I love to him projects. I love starting things like a like our creative, showing the show clone midnight mirror man where we would the whole point
so that midnight roxy you encourage
dress up. I think I saw something for this yeah we'll eat. I like three times sold out
he's time and then I kind of like losing
I'm late.
and so they can there be anything park, ass, wise people, billygoat, jamaica, wrestling pie. Keyser do it, then,
it's like well, then. I won't like wrestling as much
it won't elsewhere, billions work, yeah and then the gis. I just special
once it got such a crowded field. I was like, if I don't have anything that I know I want to do, then I'm wasting people's time trying to put out a podcast where I'm like. I don't even know what this is about. You know so
was it the one with park and that would have been fun, but he he's kind of like it has an exclusive with this,
company and I didn't feel like those can be the best way for
actually get me up and get other foreign contract hated. Jesus Christ, I fucking hate, podcast companies
yeah a really is one of the things I detest when you win,
When I talk to someone, I won't say was like
is it going to want a comedy podcast where my ponca podcast gets ready to launch as someone who started it and he goes well, I'm still working on the deal
They are what deal like you're getting fucked
immediately you're getting fought. Yeah, you don't need a deal, you can just make it yeah, like
drives me now makes sense and watch what makes me crazy about this business is, are so many people that aren't talented,
It simply know how to put their fingers inside your pie, who now again the metal that yeah, I guess
staggered that more now, but it also sometimes I take it as a compliment when there, like a noble
direct your special or want to do this, or that- and I was like oh
You see value in me and
that's cool, I'm not gonna. Let you do that. I'm not gonna! Let you do the things you are, but I appreciate the fact that you tell me sometimes I'd I don't
necessarily have that high esteem for myself about real, I mean, I know, I'm good at com and m m there, another like leg, the especially for a few times
I mean I got married when I and then and then had started
and again, I wasn't used leg anyone that one of the date may, because I was
pool of light. That's where data me, because I could go get them into some party or something I oh, I was, I was crazy, is alive
it's time you met a chicken daily chick. You were,
it really just a kid yeah.
And now you're famous you're on a tv show your loosened way, you're looking good and people.
And your famous slightly famous, ok trust me, my mother, my threshold.
Fame is pretty fucking low. I consider myself famous yeah well if you're famous they're called babies, your devilish bug, yeah the dude who's who's with aryan tom at the national championship game and maybe got recognized like fifty times right walking around the stadium or through the weekend. It might have been more than that, but I said to them: I go: isn't it fun being famous and they're like yo, we're
not famous, and I was like the fuck we are like people are young or names and they were like nah. That's not that they're so humble about it, but I love it. I love. I love all that.
Trappings of of
business that the drafting bother people.
Like you said, like I love bullshit and in a meeting green talk, no guy bosnia. If ever bog ass, a lover,
talking to people and they go, I love you go, do
I lost sixty barrels because of the way the challenge tat. Anne had a shit, no norman. I definitely I thought the people after him.
Show you like. I usually like. I sell my share my merge online by using on travel at it, and I learned
to do that and then, but I
we'll meet and greet everyone, and I mean I look like that's one of the bases of why I was like I have to make the shows, because I get something
is about the weight loss in that and above the biggest one was like my I love how you talk about your son. I have a sigh,
I have a kid with autism or I have a brother I have this or that or I had one girl interrupt me in the middle of my act. When I start talking about my son, she just goes. I have autism
something like that makes sense the perimeter work, but it was too late to in the
whether they were like. Oh, we love how you talk about it and we don't see that and- and I was like I have to make this show I have to like and that's part of it whereas like
and in it I wouldn't even be a comic cause. I don't like to have him that, like I'm blessed, I'm lucky as shit that, like a divorced dude, I want exc.
Many college for three weeks. I am able to take care of my son and we have a house with a poor,
We have a list so that come in now me no,
when I say I did see a curse- all brought cover more than anyone here but, like the axe, didn't see a common problem, she seed cheap cheaply.
Four men in is he really gave up on my laptop,
if you're ever planned on it, your your mom didn't see it coming. No, she was actively telling me not to do that. I mean everybody is kind of supportive in the beginning, until it starts being costing them a little bit of money. You know when you're like, oh, I can't pay. My phone bill was checking. She told me
she told me you should move back to orlando cv. Cbs, sell boats, my dad,
and as I know this is my thing. There's a quota was in churchill that my mom gave me
mom and my mom always believed
may still live by the seller she's dead, but my mom definitely believed in me my dad.
think. Was I gotta get it like? You know
That's what you want to do. Fine, I don't get, it might have
backup plan. I'm sure he thought, but I didn't have one, but
I don't remember my one of my uncles call my mom and saying we should have a. We should talk to bert. Tell them it's not going to happen formed by the way I've been doing it like for a year.
I never really been doing it that long,
I've been doing it for a year.
How do you really done it and by the way I got a deal like six months in so like, but people still,
No, what I say I say tomorrow, if all the time, I'm a penny stock, I'm a petty soccer,
what did it mean and I was making sure
I was making no money and stand up and then I I blew up to
king seven hundred dollars weekend and I,
at twelve allows weekend. Thirteen allows weekend for years.
Then, and then you go to the place where europe, you start succeed,
being an you go, did you
had that we wanted to go. I fucking told you yeah
actually a really good week. I would love to tell this story. Oh it was the week that my divorce was finalized. I had to go back to my old town, salem, Oregon and
I just started run it in a judgment on come in and I think big this,
oh, I had just been announced by with an errand available yeah. So I was is really excited and heavy and
I just started running and all these people in the smaller.
I saw my son
my ex wife mom, and she was just like. I heard you doing something
The euro will well that's nice and then her huh
or ex husband at the time are what
the now her ex husband was like she's lion. We know exactly what you been up to wrap it around and also to shut up to that guy. I love that guy yeah yeah yeah that was grey, and then I saw this I'll do that
start economy were in the path and kind of was
weird to me when it was like. Oh you're, not gonna do shit, you're, never gonna make it, and then you and then I went to the gamestop to go, buy my son, a video game and he's the clerk behind the counter. He was just like: oh I hear you're doing well. This is a great day
and pay, and I'm walking down the street- and I run into this guy, who ran the capital city theatre, where my friend had their funeral whither the tender he was run in it. He was very church E. He didn't run it anymore, he's very turkey. I was running like a little of brokers. Shit saws run in a school,
like, where our common class, where I believe and I would be flat out a belated again make you funny, but I can show you how not to be an asshole. I open my eggs, we can put Joe
together. I'm someone that can help listen to your jokes and we can. We can figure this out to gather I'm also figuring this out. You know, and I assume it's people that were really cool and into it at this twelve year old kid that was actually really good at it. I hope that he continues and but then he like
It- was like nah we're going to cancel your class. We needed that we need to redo any more shows with you cause. I did this one show
it's me and it was like a bunch of lesbians from portland and he just hated it and it was just lag. Your shows too vulgar you're never going to make it in comedy being that vulgar and then
erica while the downstream first words out of his mouth. We really gone
say. I saw you own cone, data's keys, get in just and then
I went to an hour. K would have fran,
his girl and then arcade with a friend, yeah nineteen. Seventy nine was everyday for me, but then I ended up in a three way with these. Ladies on the day that I got a divorce and then when they leave- and I order some food from room service, the guy who does
There is a room service to me
as in the the ex husband who I just told you about when he got remarried that wife hated me to like you'll, never make it in comedy, and then the dude that drops off my food to me is her son, and so then I tip him. Fifty bucks to run this might be the best day ever it was.
Oh! I wish I had a day like that. It really I was like this. I go. I must have great karma like this was just a day that was meant for me. I got to tell everybody who hated on me. I didn't even say anything to them. They just knew they knew they were wrong and then I got a three way and then I got the tip that kid, so it was fun Jesus
It should end on that, as I don't think I'm top of that might be one of my bed as I like. I do. I do this thing where I live. Sometimes I try not to do it, but where I here
restoring that I try to find myself
similar and the whole time. I'm my remembering on this is the best I ever did
is your. This is your groundhogs day that you live every day and my divorce got finalized or you called the ex, no, not at all
Do you have for custody yeah nice? So
it's both live down here, she's still in salem. Now she lives in las vegas. Really, okay, yeah! That's my reaction to it yeah!
intense, crazy fuck it you have to give our universe, have to kill my wife deadly weapon.
Killer, I dunno what I'd do without her. Now I get that. No I'm happy. No, it was great, I don't even say a divorce. I say I completed my marriage. We made it through
his happy, I'm abbe I'm doing well,
if you don't fuck and also man
I tell you, you know you
there is a minority. I think I'll put myself in this
because I like, I only have one person the didn't like me in the business or two.
One was I thought I had.
APOLLO tomkins, less
im? So weird yeah- and you know he resources when he was drunk in it- was when he was drinking, but I will note that was why I think
my drinking, might have had a little bit to do that as well.
the only person I would really like a beef with word that I was like, and
over the
over the over in october. He reached out to me and sent me an email, very nice, email and kind of cleared it up and or at least explained.
his point of view and then asked me to explain my point of view and which I did.
And we cleared it up and I was like cool
and I kind of I was like oh cool. I don't have a problem with any comedy club now and I was like oh
at item. In that moment I was like others deeds that have problems.
and every comedy club like date, like those guys who have beef with people yeah
I know and then you go. Oh, I would hate to be that guy yeah and
guys, like me and you and I think, there's a lot of there's a lot of us. There's more.
The not just crews,
I have and like everyone likes,
I think I'm a guy that the logical, like your guy, that everyone
x and of your love. You
but I've never heard about word about you once they have good. If I do our text you and tell you suddenly, I asked why he has given
in the promote and not really right now, you're all a little bit but just like at colleges. So I don't feel like you do go around just murder college, you weasel prize or do okay. I'm gonna tell you right now by the way for everyone listening you ready for this. I guarantee you RON is getting probably twenty
five grand a college guaranteed us end quote, and I guarantee you goes in war,
it's out of his mouth, murders destroys at the end. There
a bunch of nineteen year old girls floating around him and runs like nah. I'm out that no I'm definitely usually out yeah bring my playstation. That's what we're doing. I know that seems like a lot of trouble. A lot of trouble, fucking shit.
In college I got off. I passed
idea will perhaps for me, is your offer colleges and the kids of her me?
I guess- and they know me in there like do we just reported you yeah, we both college it would we
we caught. We call quoted you re maretzek through the roof
Colleagues, I don't like doing them yeah we did it. We were party to
whenever someone meets my rate, my rate is ridiculous. Whenever,
meets it. I
immediately regret taking a gig because the same thing fuck it up
Do we care about company comedy? We just want to get fucked up. You yeah,
you know I do care about like I care about it. A lot I didn't I didn't corporate in veil that was
I have so much money. I was like a really prepared for it and I got up and start
it's all due to Tom millionaires and
Cargoes Emma just tell the machine story, and I was like,
He was told machine and those
but others go party and, like us, are right, yeah, it's against him.
So crashing, but also in a wherever I part of me was cool, and then we went down to a bar and I guess what they were
it was more of an interactive fans of the package and they wanted more of an interactive there like the animal
We get drink, but in order to come get you out here we have to pay you to do stand up, but we really just wanna hang with you and it was. They were really funny.
is there will again no yo yo yo yo this
Our indian guy make fun him real, quick and I was like. I don't really do that, like I'm, not good at that, like if I, if I did what I think you want me to do you out
Have we being racist like I'm like outnumber, can make fun of my friends, indian. I guess I could
make fun of them. I dunno, like have a you, don't know like I dunno the guy and as for example, the guy was your mom makes curry hiya asshole or whatever
in that event. Is the list is gonna get along currie? I'm but
but I just ended up getting fucked up with them and I was eating pain pills at the times that vulnerable waterfall and we just got started splitting up
hey pills, everyone's eating. A painful is a really great fucking time and I kept
like. I was like blown away. I was like this is all you guys wanted was just a party with me and they're, like fuck yeah. Those two were two shots with the machine and I was like I was like yeah
as was a cool my by way my wife and daughter, flown outside. I was going mobile phone if a waterfall and they-
in the hotel room, and I came back latest fuck, my wife's, like how was it and I go. I just told us the machine story and went party with him she was like. Are you fucking kidding me? I was like it was really awesome.
With all the time, then I want some college and the kids would like. We ve met your rates, so we smoke dm two,
I was like, oh man, you think I'm rogan, I'm not real like I don't do. Dmt like I'll, have a I and I, by the way I won't even drink with children like I'm not going to,
ring with enraged. Kid yeah, like that's fucking, know yet
the trouble you're asking for trouble patrolling and I'm not having sex with a nineteen year old. Unless you really foresaw me girls, if you listening,
no, but the young man I will. I'm am glad you did this morning. One do this for a long time and I got
give a shot out. Your manager, Melanie yeah love her cheek gray, love her.
For the first time on that, when I came out, ally, she's working audacious were in a boat brushing ray,
is that is she saw their general play so earlier
and she's married to Brian Hussein, who I fucking love, and we were at a weird this back when you could take your dick.
well in public. We were at them nah. Maybe I shouldn't tell this and tell the story of pocket brian wherein the me to category we were edible were at,
next word son's birthday party at a is a long time ago and by the way, if you're going to take your dick out anywhere, it's going to be at nick's sports birthday party legally required on the invitation. So
one boy I had this move.
where I could clinch my butt cheeks and my pants or dropped my ankles, and I I think, we're in the parking lot million brian or walking towards me, and I click my blood. She can drop my past, my ankles,
They go. Oh, what's up with that embryos! Oh, I know your move. He clinches his
cheeks in his pants. What it is TAT I went I loved so fucking already goes. I got your move, not big big, just
standing in face to face,
she's a she's, also manager, man yeah. Ninety the may, then she's really gray eyes.
had my back even when I was super super virgin, broken and think I was a good investment. She always thought any stock. Your buddy stock posada paid off.
Split a couple times: a butcher.
What everyone about twitter at ron is
A gram run function, gotta, run funds. Is that calm and see my dates and think,
in her and some other place?
but I have, I have forgotten:
get out man one of the best
must go sit back our say, you're the comic
but I want to go on with
grab for the show, and I want to say
red wine. Will I watch you you're you're, comedies, just walk in
it's very living room. It's like it,
feel like you're one of my we're like a friend you know like so, but you're fantastic
I think I can produce this brother. They rather me
the
this episode is brought to you by the machine.
Summers in the air
you're, probably again urged to take a break, hit the road and escape to well somewhere anywhere,
and booking dotcom, makes anywhere possible with a huge variety of places to stay all over the EU s from five star,
I jails, the beside bungalows cabins in the woods and more looking dot com, as you covered.
Where you want to go no matter what you want to do, go to booking dot com, to find your perfect place to stay this summer,
looking dotcom booking dad year that huge d,
The breach from a few weeks ago has probably moved off your radar, but your information,
could still beyond the dark web lifelong learning,
suspicious activity like someone using your info. If there's a problem, lifelong you,
es based identity, restoration specialists will work to fix it. No one
can prevent all identity theft or monitor all transactions, but lifelong will help protect your identity long after this breaches forgotten save up to twenty five percent.
first year at lifelong dot com. Slash aware,
Transcript generated on 2023-07-13.